CONFIDENCE.
"What are you doing, _tres chere_?" asked Rita, suddenly appearing at
Margaret's door. "How is it you pass your time so cheerfully? how to
live, in this deplorable solitude? You see me fading away, positively a
shadow, in this hideous solitude!"
Margaret looked up cheerfully from her work.
"Come in, daughter of despair!" she said. And Rita came in and flung
herself on the sofa with a tragic air.
"You are doing--what?" she demanded.
"I have rather a hopeless task, I fear," said Margaret. "Peggy's hat!
She dropped it into the pond yesterday, and I am trying to smarten it up
a little, poor thing! What do you advise, Rita? I am sure you have
clever fingers, you embroider so beautifully."
"I should advise the fire," said Rita, looking with scorn at the
battered hat. "Put it in now, this moment. It will burn well, and it can
do nothing else decently."
"Ten miles from a shop," said Margaret, "and nothing else save her best
hat. No, my lady, we cannot be so extravagant. If you will not help me,
I must e'en do the best I can. I never could understand hats!" she added
ruefully.
"_Why_ do you do these things?" Rita asked, sitting up as suddenly as
she had flung herself down. "Will you tell me why? I love you! I have
told you twenty times of it; but I cannot understand why you do these
things for that young monster. Will you tell me why?"
"In the first place, she is not a monster, and I will not have you say
such things, Rita. In the second place, I am very fond of her; and in
the third, I should try to help her all I could, even if I were not fond
of her."
"Why?"
"Because it is a duty."
"Duty?" Rita laughed, and made a pretty little grimace. "English word,
ugly and stupid word! I know not its meaning. You are fond of Calibana?
Then I revere less your taste, that is all. Ah! what do you make there?
That cannot be; it cuts the soul!"
She took the hat hastily from Margaret's hand. Had the latter been a
little overclumsy on purpose? Certainly her dimple deepened a little as
she relinquished the forlorn object. Rita held it on her finger and
twirled it around.
"The fire is really the only place for it," she said again; "but if it
must be preserved, do you not see that the only possible thing is to
turn this ribbon? It was not wet through; the other side is fresh."
She still frowned at the hat, but her fingers began to move here and
there, twisting and turning in a magical way. In five minutes the hat
was a different object, and Margaret gave a little cry of pleasure.
"Rita, you are a dear! Why, it looks better than it did before the
wetting, ever and ever so much better! Thank you, you clever creature! I
shall bring all my hats to you for treatment, and I am sure Peggy will
be so much obliged when I tell her--"
"If you dare!" cried Rita. "You will do nothing of the sort, I beg, _ma
cousine_. What I have done, was done for you; I desire neither thanks
nor any other thing from La Calibana. That she remain out of my sight
when possible, that she hold her tongue when we must be together,--that
is all I demand. Reasonable, I hope? If not--" She shrugged her
shoulders and began to hum a love-song.
Margaret sighed. "If you could only see, my dear," she began gently,
"how much happier we should all be, if you and Peggy could only make up
your minds to make the best of it--"
"The best!" cried Rita, flashing into another mood, and coming to hover
over her quiet cousin like a bird of paradise. "Do I not make the best?
You are the best, Marguerite. I make all I can of you--except a
milliner; never could I do that."
"Listen!" she added, dropping on the floor by Margaret's side. "You see
me happy to-day, do you not? I do not frown or pout,--I can't see why I
should not, when I feel black,--but to-day is a white day. And why? Can
you guess?"
Margaret shook her head discreetly.
"I cannot do more than guess," she said, "but you seemed very much
pleased with the letter that came this morning."
Rita flung her arms round her. "Aha!" she cried. "We perceive! We drop
our dove's eyes; we look more demure than any mouse, but we perceive!
Ah! Marguerite, behold me about to give you the strongest proof of my
love: I confide in you."
She drew a bulky letter from her pocket. Margaret looked at it
apprehensively, fearing she knew not what.
"From my friend," Rita explained, spreading the sheets of thin blue
paper, crossed and recrossed, on her lap; "my Conchita, the other half
of my soul. You shall hear part of it, Marguerite, but other parts are
too sacred. She begins so beautifully: '_Mi alma_'--but you have no
Spanish yet; the pity, to turn it into cold English! 'My soul' has a
foolish sound. 'Saint Rosalie, Saint Eulalie, and the blessed Saint
Teresa, have you in their holy keeping! I live the life of a withered
leaf without you; my soul flies like a mourning bird to your frozen
North, where you are immured'--oh, it doesn't sound a bit right! I
cannot read it in English." Indeed, Margaret thought it sounded too
silly for her beloved language, but she said nothing, only giving a
glance of sympathetic interest.
"She tells me of all they are doing," Rita went on. "All day they sit in
the closed rooms, as the sun is too hot for going out; but in the
evening they drive, and Conchita has been allowed to ride on horseback.
Fancy, what bliss! Fernando was with her!"
Rita stopped suddenly, and Margaret, feeling that she must say
something, echoed, "Fernando?"
"Her brother," said Rita, and she cast down her eyes. "Also a friend of
mine,--a cousin on my mother's side; the handsomest person in Havana,
the most enchanting, the most distinguished! He sends me messages,--no
matter about those; but think of this: he is leaving Havana, he is
coming to New York, he will be in this country! Marguerite! think of
it!"
"What shall I think of it?" asked Margaret, raising her eyes to her
cousin's; the gray eyes were cool and tranquil, but the dark ones were
full of fire and light.
"Is he a friend of your father's, too, Rita?"
Rita's face darkened. "My father!" she cried impatiently. "My father is
a knight of the middle ages; he demands the stiff behaviour of fifty in
a youth of twenty-one. He, who has forgotten what youth is!" She was
silent for a moment, but the shadow remained on her beautiful face.
"After all, it is no matter," she said, rising abruptly; "I was
mistaken, Marguerite. The letter is for me alone; you would not care for
it,--perhaps not understand it. You, too, have the cold Northern blood.
Forget what I have said."
"Oh, but, my dear," cried Margaret, fearful of losing her slight hold on
this creature of moods, "don't be so unkind! I want to know why they
must sit in the house all day, and what they do from morning till night.
I have always longed to know about the life you live at home. Be good
now, wild bird, and perch again."
Rita wavered, but when Margaret laid her cool, firm hand on hers, she
sank down again, though she still looked dissatisfied.
"We sit in the house," she said, "of course, in the heats,--what else
could we do? Only at night is it possible to go out. No, we do not read
much. It is too hot to read, and Cuban women do not care for books; oh,
a romance now and then; but for great, horrible books like those you
_raffole_ about downstairs there,--" she shook her shoulders as if
shaking off a heavy weight. "We sew a great deal, embroider, do
lace-work like that you admired. Then at noon we sleep as long as
possible, and in the evening we go out to walk, drive, ride. To walk in
the orange-groves by moonlight,--ah! that is heaven! One night last
month we slipped out, Conchita and I, and--you must never breathe this,
Marguerite--and met my brother and Fernando beneath the great
orange-tree in the south grove--"
"Your brother!" exclaimed Margaret. "You never told me you had a
brother, Rita!"
"Hush! I have so much the habit of silence about him. He is with the
army. My father is a Spaniard. Carlos and I are Cubans." Her eyes
flashed, and she looked like the spirit of battle.
"My father will not hear him named!" she cried. "He would have Cuba
continue a slave, she, who will be the queen and goddess of the sea when
the war is over! Ah, Marguerite! my heart is on flame when I speak of my
country. Well,--we met them there. They are both with the army, the
insurgents, as the Spaniards call them. We walked up and down. The
orange-blossoms were so sweet, the fragrance hung like clouds in the
air. I had a lace mantilla over my head,--I will show it to you one day.
We talked of _Cuba libre_, and they told us how they live there in the
mountains. Ah! if a girl could fight, would I be here? No; a sword
should be by my side, a plume in my hat, and I would be with Carlos and
Fernando in the mountains. Well,--ah, the bad part is to come! Carlos
had been wounded; his arm was in a sling. Folly, to make it of a white
handkerchief! The senora--my father's wife--must have seen it shining
among the trees; we know it must have been that, for we girls wore black
dresses of purpose,--a woman thinks of what a man never dreams of. She
called my father; he came out, raging. We had a fine scene. Burning
words passed between my father and Carlos. They vowed never to see each
other more. They went, and Conchita and I go fainting, dying, into the
house. Three days after comes my uncle's letter,--behold me here!
Marguerite, this is my story. Preserve it in your bosom, it is a sacred
confidence."
Margaret hardly knew whether she were in real life, or in a theatre.
Rita's voice, though low, vibrated with passion; her eyes were liquid
fire; her little hands clenched themselves, and she drew her breath in
through her closed teeth with a savage sound. Then, suddenly, all was
changed. She flung her arms apart, and burst into laughter.
"Your face!" she cried. "Marguerite, your face! what a study of horror!
You, cool stream, flowing over white sands, you have never seen a rapid,
how much less a torrent. You, do you know what life is? My faith, I
think not! I frighten you, my cousin."
Margaret was indeed troubled as well as absorbed in all she had heard.
What a volcano this girl was! What might she not do or say, in some
moment of passion? This was all new to Margaret; her life had been so
sheltered, a quiet stream indeed, till her father's death the year
before. She had known few girls save her schoolmates, for the most part
quiet, studious girls like herself. She had lived a great deal in books,
and knew far more about Spain in the sixteenth century than Cuba in the
nineteenth. What should she do? How should she learn to curb and help
these two restless spirits, so different, yet both turning to her and
flying in detestation from each other?
Pondering thus, she made no reply for a moment; but Rita was in no mood
to endure silence.
"Statue!" she cried. "Thing of marble! I pour out my soul to you, and
you have no words for me! And we have been here a week, a mortal,
suffering week, and I know nothing of your life, your thought. Tell me,
you, how you have lived, before you came here. I frighten you, I see it;
try now if you can tame me."
She laughed again, and shook all her pretty ribbons and frills. Every
day she dressed as if for a _fete_, and took a mournful pleasure in
reflecting how her toilets were all wasted.
"How did I live?" said Margaret vaguely. "Oh, very quietly, Rita. So
quietly, I don't think you would care to hear about my days."
"I burn to hear!" cried Rita. "I perish! Continue, Marguerite."
"I lived with my dear father." Margaret spoke slowly and reluctantly.
Her memories were so precious, she could not bear to drag them out, and
expose them to curious, perhaps unloving, eyes.
"Our house was in Blankton, a tiny little house, just big enough for
Father and me; my mother died, you know, a good many years ago, and
Father and I have been always together. He wrote a great
deal,--historical work,--and I helped him, and wrote for him, and read
with him. Then--oh, I went to school, of course, and we walked every
afternoon, and in the evening Father read aloud while I worked, and I
played and sang for him. You see, Rita, there really is not much to
tell."
Not much! yet in the telling, the girl felt her heart beat high and
painfully, and the sobs rise in her throat, as the dear, happy, peaceful
days came back to her; the blessed home life, the love which hedged her
in so that no rough wind should blow on her, the wise, kindly, loving
companionship of him who had been father and mother both to her. The
tears came to her eyes, and she was silent, feeling that she could not
speak for the moment. Rita was thoughtful, too, and when she spoke
again, it was in a softened tone.
"I can picture it!" she said. "It is a picture without colour; I could
not have borne such a life; but for you, Marguerite, so tranquil,
demanding so little, with peace in your soul, it must have been sweet.
And now,--after this summer here, only not horrible because in it I
learn to know my dear Marguerite,--after this summer, what do you do?
what is your life?"
"I hope to get a position as teacher," said Margaret. "Then, when I have
earned something, I shall go to the Library School, and learn to be a
librarian; that has been my dream for a long time."
"Your nightmare!" cried Rita. "What dreadful things even to think about,
Marguerite! But it shall not be; never, I tell you! You shall come back
with me to Cuba, and be my sister. I have money--oceans, I believe;
more than I can spend, try as I will. You shall live with me; we will
buy a plantation, orange-groves, sugar-cane,--you shall study
cultivation, I will ride about the plantation--"
"By moonlight?" asked Marguerite mischievously.
"Always by moonlight!" cried Rita. "It shall be always moonlight! Carlos
shall be our intendant, and Fernando--"
"I think Fernando would much better stay in the mountains!" said
Margaret decidedly.