A SACRIFICE
Once more the labours of a twelvemonth had been exhibited at the Academy of
Design--some to be classed among things "that were not born to die;" others
to fall into nameless graves. Mr. Clifton was represented by an exquisite
OEnone, and on the same wall, in a massive oval frame, hung the first
finished production of his pupil. For months after Russell's departure she
sat before her easel, slowly filling up the outline sketched while his eyes
watched her. Application sometimes trenches so closely upon genius as to be
mistaken for it in its results, and where both are happily blended, the bud
of Art expands in immortal perfection. Electra spared no toil, and so it
came to pass that the faultless head of her idol excited intense and
universal admiration. In the catalogue it was briefly mentioned as "No.
17--a portrait; first effort of a young female artist." _Connoisseurs_, who
had committed themselves by extravagant praise, sneered at the announcement
of the catalogue, and, after a few inquiries, blandly asserted that no tyro
could have produced it; that the master had wrought out its perfection, and
generously allowed the pupil to monopolize the encomiums. In vain Mr.
Clifton disclaimed the merit, and asserted that he had never touched the
canvas; that she had jealously refused to let him aid her. Incredulous
smiles and unmistakable motions of the head were the sole results of his
expostulation. Electra was indignant at the injustice meted out to her,
and, as might have been expected, rebelled against the verdict. Some weeks
after the close of the exhibition, the OEnone was purchased and the
portrait sent home. Electra placed it on the easel once more, and stood
before it in rapt contemplation. Coldness, silence, neglect, all were
forgotten when she looked into the deep, beautiful eyes, and upon the
broad, bold, matchless brow.
She had not the faintest hope that he would ever cherish a tenderer feeling
for her; but love is a plant of strange growth. A curious plant, truly, and
one which will not bear transplanting, as many a luckless experiment has
proved. To-day, as Electra looked upon her labours, the coils of Time
seemed to fall away; the vista of Eternity opened before her, peopled with
two forms, which on earth walked widely separate paths, and over her
features stole a serene, lifted expression, as if, after painful scaling,
she had risen above the cloud-region and caught the first rays of perpetual
sunshine.
Mr. Clifton had watched her for some moments with lowering brow and jealous
hatred of the picture. Approaching, he looked over her shoulder, and said--
"Electra, I must speak to you; hear me. You hug a phantom to your heart;
Russell does not and will not love you, other than as his cousin."
The blood deserted her face, leaving a greyish pallor, but the eyes sought
his steadily, and the rippling voice lost none of its rich cadence.
"Except as his cousin, I do not expect Russell to love me."
"Oh child! you deceive yourself; this is a hope that you cling to with mad
tenacity."
She wrung her hand from his, and drew her figure to its utmost height.
"No; you must hear me now. I have a right to question you--the right of my
long, silent, faithful love. You may deny it, but that matters little; be
still, and listen. Did you suppose that I was simply a generous man when I
offered to guard and aid you--when I took you to my house, placed you in
my mother's care, and lavished affection upon you? If so, put away the
hallucination. Consider me no longer your friend, look at me as I am, a
jealous and selfishly exacting man, who stands before you to-day and tells
you he loves you. Oh, Electra! From the morning when you first showed me
your sketches, you have been more than my life to me. Every hope I have
centred in you. I have not deceived myself; I knew that you loved Russell.
When he came here, I saw that the old fascination still kept its hold upon
you, but I saw, too, what you saw quite as plainly--that in Russell
Aubrey's heart there is room for nothing but ambition. I knew how you
suffered, and I believed it was the death-struggle of your love. But,
instead, I find you, day by day, before that easel--oblivious of me, of
everything but the features you cling to so insanely. Do you wonder that I
hate that portrait? Do you wonder that I am growing desperate? If he loved
you in return, I could bear it better; but as it is, I am tortured beyond
all endurance. I have spent nearly three years in trying to gain your
heart; all other aims have faded before this one absorbing love. To-day I
lay it at your feet, and ask if I have not earned some reward. Oh, Electra!
have you no gratitude?"
A scarlet spot burned on his pale cheeks, and the mild liquid grey eyes
sparkled like stars.
He stretched out his hand, but she drew back a step.
"God forgive me! but I have no such love for you."
A ghastly smile broke over his face, and, after a moment, the snowy
handkerchief he passed across his lips was stained with ruby streaks.
"I know that, and I know the reason. But, once more, I ask you to give me
your hand. Electra, dearest, do not, I pray you, refuse me this. Oh, child!
give me your hand, and in time you will learn to love me."
He seized her fingers, and stooped his head till the silky brown beard
mingled with her raven locks.
"Mr. Clifton, to marry without love would be a grievous sin; I dare not. We
would hate each other. Life would be a curse to both, and death a welcome
release. Could you endure a wife who accepted your hand from gratitude and
pity? Oh! such a relationship would be horrible beyond all degree. I
shudder at the thought."
"But you would learn to love me."
"But you cannot take Russell's place. None can come between him and my
heart."
"Electra Grey, you are unwomanly in your unsought love."
"Unwomanly! If so, made such by your unmanliness. Unwomanly! Were you more
manly, I had never shocked your maudlin sentiments of propriety."
"And this is my reward for all the tenderness I have lavished on you. When
I stooped to beg your hand, to be repulsed with scorn and loathing. To
spend three years in faithful effort to win your heart, and reap ----
contempt, hatred."
Staggering back, he sank into his arm-chair and closed his eyes a moment,
then continued--
"I would not have troubled you long, Electra. It was because I knew that my
life must be short at best, that I urged you to gild the brief period with
the light of your love. I would not have bound you always to me; and when I
asked your hand a few minutes since, I knew that death would soon sever the
tie and set you free. Let this suffice to palliate my 'unmanly' pleading. I
have but one request to make of you now, and, weak as it may seem, I beg of
you not to deny me. You are preparing to leave my house; this I know; I see
it in your face, and the thought is harrowing to me. Electra, remain under
my roof while I live; let me see you every day, here, in my house. If not
as my wife, stay as my friend, my pupil, my child. I little thought I could
ever condescend to ask this of anyone; but the dread of separation bows me
down. Oh, child, I will not claim you long."
She stood up before him with the portrait in her arms, resolved then and
there to leave him for ever. But the ghastly pallor of his face, the
scarlet thread oozing over his lips and saturating the handkerchief with
which he strove to staunch it, told her that the request was preferred on
no idle pretext. In swift review, his kindness, generosity, and unwavering
affection passed before her, and the mingled accents of remorse and
compassion whispered: "Pay your debt of gratitude by sacrificing your
heart. If you can make him happy, you owe it to him."
Softly she took his hand, and said in a low, thrilling tone--
"Mr. Clifton, I was passionate and hasty, and said some unkind things which
I would fain recall, and for which I beg your pardon, I thank you for the
honour you would have conferred on me, and for the unmerited love you
offered me. Unless it were in my power to return that love, it would be
sinful to give you my hand; but, since you desire it so earnestly, I will
promise to stay by your side, to do what I can to make you happy; to prove
by my devotion that I am not insensible to all your kindness, that I am
very grateful for the affection you have given me. I come and offer you
this, as a poor return for all that I owe you; it is the most my conscience
will permit me to tender. My friend, my master, will you accept it and
forgive the pain and sorrow I have caused you?"
He felt her tears falling on his fingers, and, for a moment, neither spoke;
then he drew the hands to his lips and kissed them tenderly.
"Thank you, Electra. I know it is a sacrifice on your part, but I am
selfish enough to accept it. Heaven bless you, my pupil."
"In future we will not allude to this day of trial--let it be forgotten;
'let the dead past bury its dead.' I will have no resurrected phantoms. And
now, sir, you must not allow this slight hemorrhage to depress you. In a
few days you will be stronger, quite able to examine and find fault with my
work. Shall I send a note to Dr. Le Roy, asking him to call and see you
this evening?"
"He has just left me. Say nothing of the hemorrhage to mother; it would
only distress her."
He released her hands, and, stooping over his pillow, she smoothed the
disordered hair, and for the first time pressed her lips to his forehead.
Thus she bowed her neck to the yoke, and, with a fixed, unalterable will,
entered on the long dreary ministry to which she felt that duty called.