O wad some power the giftie gie ’em,
To see their legs as others see ’em!
It was frae monie a short skirt free ’em,
And foolish notion,
That toothpicks and piano legs
Inspire devotion.
* * * * *
Did It Ever Happen to You?
Met a pretty girl one day,
Took her down to see a play;
Bought her candy, cake and cream,
And other things that she had seen.
Thought I was in good all right,
When I took her home that night,
Hung around and begged a kiss,
And what think you she said, this miss?
“Of all the cheap skates I ever lamped with my ‘once overs,’
You are the crustiest two by twice, hair-brained gazeke on
Gawd’s earth,
Shake those gunboats of yours and evaporate.
GOOD NIGHT!”
* * * * *