So determined is the esprit du corps of the fashionables, that
ambitious young ladies secretly pride themselves upon the attainment
of womanly weaknesses.
There are certain "female weaknesses" which one would think young
ladies might hesitate to mention; but so strong is this secret pride
in the signs of ladyhood, that many fashionable young ladies go over
the details with real pleasure.
I once heard a conversation between an invalid aunt and four young
ladies. The young ladies were all unmarried, and the oldest not
above twenty-three. The aunt was a successful competitor in the race
for number and intensity of sufferings, and embraced every
opportunity to make a tabular statement. Her spine was the favorite
theme. The burning, the pain, the sharp and indescribable dartings
and excruciating tortures were something fearful to hear. But the
girls constantly interrupted her with saying, "That is just the way
I feel;" and, "I have exactly that pain;" and, "precisely, I have
had that pain for months."
The aunt replied, "Now, girls, don't tell me that. It isn't possible
for you to have such afflictions at your age." But they declared,
with sparkling eyes, that every one of the sufferings she had
described,--every one of them,--they enjoyed in the most dreadful
way. The aunt enjoyed another class of affections, upon which she
lingered with real gusto. I do not feel at liberty to go into
particulars; but here again the young ladies were enough for her.
They declared, without flinching, that every one of her sufferings,
they had, and what was more, they had certain horrible variations
which they described, and which, in fact, I thought rather outdid
the poor aunt. Aunt spoke of her headache in the most brilliant
style; but here the girls were not to be beaten. In fact, it was
neck and neck to the end.
I have heard conversations of another sort which are pertinent in
this discussion. A strong country woman, accustomed to work in the
garden, and to take long walks, mentions to a group of fashionable
young ladies, that she has just walked six miles. "Wonderful!
dreadful! is it possible? Why, I couldn't walk six miles to save my
life." Perhaps the country aunt says, "I finished a large washing
before leaving, and hung the clothes upon the line." Miss Araminta
exclaims, "I never washed anything in my life. Why, how is it done?
and how dreadful it looks to see all sorts of clothes hanging out in
a yard."
The common affectation of ignorance of all useful work is another
illustration. A young lady sometimes knows how to make certain rare
and delicate cake, but she never knows how to make bread; she knows
how to make pink dogs in worsted, but not how to make a shirt. She
knows how to crochet, but not how to make garments for herself or
her brothers; and thus on through the whole list. She knows nothing
whatever of useful work, in which the body and heart may be brought
into earnest, womanly play.
My dear girls, I could show you in this city a sight, which would
make you sick at heart. I know a home, in which you could see, on
any day, just before dinner, a pale, thin, overworked mother
hurrying to and fro in her kitchen, and in the parlor overhead four
daughters. One young lady is playing the piano (classical music),
and the others are crocheting, tatting, and feasting upon the "Awful
Secret of the Mysterious Milk-Maid," and one other thing--waiting to
be called to dinner. And, although the mother generally thinks it
very hard, I have known many cases where she joined in, and really
advocated this plan of bringing up daughters.
You may hear such a mother exclaim, "Well, I don't care; my girls
shan't be worked to death as I have been. Let them have an easy time
while they can; their turn will come soon enough."
So they screw up their waists, recline upon a couch, and ponder the
"Fearful Doom of the Mysterious Count," and thus get ready to take
their turn. Thousands of young ladies, in this city, are being
trained for wives and mothers by such means.