April closed the book and handed it back without writing anything.
"If that is true, I really do not see what it has to do with you--or
me," she said coldly.
"Oh, I know it is true," said Mrs. Stanislaw, airily ignoring the rest
of April's remark. "I had it from a lady who is travelling
second-class because she has a bevy of children. She knows Mrs. Bellew
quite well, and, curiously enough, is a friend also of Cora Janis, who
wrote to her some time ago asking her to look out for Miss Poole on the
voyage. Naturally, Cora thought her governess would also be travelling
second." Mrs. Stanislaw smiled drily. "She little knows our April
Fool."
The girl's fascinated eyes watched the line of her smile. It was like
a thin curved knife, all the crueller for being artificially reddened.
"Why should you have such a down on her?"
The older woman's hard, handsome eyes took expression of surprise.
"A down on her? You are mistaken. I am only sorry that a girl should
so cheapen herself and her sex generally."
April could have shaken her, but it seemed wiser to try propitiation
instead. Her own career, as well as Diana's reputation, was at stake.
"After all, she has harmed no one but herself, Mrs. Stanislaw. As for
Captain Bellew, I daresay he told her long ago about his being married.
. . ."
"If you think so you think worse of her than I do," said Mrs. Stanislaw
acidly, "and I could hardly suppose that!"
"I do not think badly of her at all," retorted April indignantly. "She
is only a girl, and if she has been misled--well, it seems to me that
the situation calls for a little human charity rather than
condemnation."
"Of course," said the soft-voiced one. "I quite agree. Far be it from
me to condemn. One has, however, certain duties to one's friends."
April saw clearly what she meant, and that it was as useless to try to
divert her from her intention as to argue with an octopus. The very
fact that she knew Mrs. Janis would probably put an extinguisher on
April's career as a governess. Her impersonation of Lady Diana was
bound to come out, and if Mrs. Janis was cut on the same pattern as her
friend, she would be truly outraged by such an impertinence in a mere
governess. There was little to do but keep a tight lip and hope for
the best. For the moment, indeed, her troubles were swamped by a flood
of pity for Diana. She felt sure that Diana was in love with Bellew,
and feared that he had not told her the truth. On the other hand, he
might honourably have done so, and Diana being the reckless
scatterbrain she was, still chose to dally on the primrose path of
danger. It was hard to know what to do.
On the main deck dancing was in full swing, and the first sight that
met her eyes was Diana and Bellew scampering in a tango. Diana wore a
satin gown of curious blue that gleamed and shone like the blue light
of sulphurous flames, and as she danced she trilled a little French
song that was often on her lips:
"Tout le mond
Au salon
On y tan-gue, on y tan-gue,
Tout le mond
Au salon
On y tan-gue, tout en rang."
It was a parody on an old South of France chanson, and everyone was
singing it in Paris that year. Someone far down the deck, who had
evidently read the original in Alphonse Daudet's _Lettres de Mon
Moulin_, took up the refrain:
"Sur le pont
D'Avignon
On y dan-se, on y dan-se,
Sur le pont
D'Avignon
On y dan-se, tout en rond."
Small use trying to stop her and speak serious things to her in that
mad frolic. April herself was whirled into the pool of music and
movement, and did not emerge until the band, at a late hour, struck up
the National Anthem. By special dispensation of the Captain, dancing
had been prolonged because it was the last ball of the voyage. The
next two nights were to be respectively devoted to a bridge-drive and a
grand farewell concert. However, only a score or so of the most ardent
dancers were left on deck when the final note of music sounded and the
lights went out with a click. Figures became wraith-like in the
moonlight, and April gave a sigh as her partner's arm fell from her
waist and they drew up by the ship's rail, where Vereker Sarle stood
watching them and smoking.
"And that's the end of the story," said she, laughing a little
ruefully. Her partner went away to get her a cold drink, and she half
expected Sarle to reproach her because it had been his dance and she
had purposely avoided dancing with him. But he only said: "Africa is
the beginning of many stories."
She shivered a little, though the night was warm.
"I am beginning to be afraid of her--this Africa of yours!"
"No need for you to be afraid anywhere," he smiled. "There will always
be those who will stand between you and fear."
"How little you know!" she said abruptly. "I haven't a friend in the
world."
There was a short silence, and they looked straight at each other, the
slim, tall girl in her diaphanous tulles, the powerful, innocent-eyed
man.
"You must be joking," he began. Then he saw the trouble in her eyes
and her quivering mouth.
"But even in jest, never say that, while I am in the world," he added
gently. She was so grateful for the chivalrous words that she dared
not speak for fear the tears should rush out of her eyes. Impulsively
she put out her hand, and his brown, firm one closed on it, and held it
very close. Then he carried it to his lips. She heard him say one
word, very softly: "Diana."
At that she tore her hand from his and sped away swiftly into the
darkness. Once in her cabin she locked the door, turned out the
lights, and flung herself on to the bed. For a long time she lay
there, a rumpled heap of tulle and misery, weeping because life was a
cruel brute who kept her gifts for the rich and wellborn or the old and
indifferent, mockingly withholding from those who were young and eager
and could better appreciate them.
"What is the use of youth and good looks when one is poor and lonely?"
she sobbed. "They only mock one! It is like having a Paris hat put on
your head while your feet are bare and bleeding and your stomach is
empty."
She wished she had never begun this miserable game of Diana Vernilands,
never tasted the power of rank and place, the joy of jewels and pretty
clothes. She wished she had never left England, never seen Vereker
Sarle, and, above all, she wished she were dead.
It was about two in the morning before she had finished wishing and
sobbing. Youth began to assert itself then, and she thought of what a
sight would be in the morning, with tangled hair and swollen eyes.
Languidly at last she rose. The tulle dress was ruined, but little she
recked. Rather she felt a fierce satisfaction in the thought that it
was done for, and Diana could never wear it.
That wretched Diana! . . .
But when her flushed face was bathed and her hair brushed out she
thought more kindly of Diana, remembering that she, too, was in
trouble. Well, tomorrow there would have to be a great clean-up of all
these miserable pretences and deceits; tonight, at least, she would try
and sleep. Her hand was on the switch to turn out the lights when
there came a knocking at the door. It was such a strange, peremptory
knocking--such a careless outraging of the small hours, that for a
moment she stood rooted with astonishment and apprehension, staring at
herself in the mirror that composed the back of the door.
"Who is it?" she stammered at last.
"The Captain," said a stern voice, and in the glass she saw her cheeks
and lips become pale. What on earth could be wrong? Was the ship on
fire, or wrecked? Had their last hour come?
"I am sorry to bother you, but will you please open the door for a
moment?"
By a great effort she composed herself and did as she was bid. A
little group of people with strained faces and staring eyes presented
themselves behind the Captain; she recognized several men, the
stewardesses, and Mrs. Stanislaw; while in the shadows beyond them was
whispering and much shuffling. The whole ship seemed to be afoot.
Captain Carey gave one swift look round the cabin, then his eyes rested
on her startled face, and he patted her arm gently and reassuringly.
"Don't be alarmed, my dear Lady Diana," he said, in his tender, Irish
voice, from which all sternness had vanished. "It is only that we are
looking for Miss Poole, and we thought that possibly she might be in
here with you."
"Miss Poole!"
The girl's face stiffened and blanched. She put out a hand to support
herself against the dressing-table. The Captain signed to a
stewardess, and the little crowd moved away. There was loud knocking
on another door.
"Why are they searching? . . ."
The stewardess patted her arm, even as the Captain had done, but being
a simple woman, she spoke simply, and without waste of words.
"There is a fear that she is not on the ship."
"Not on the ship!" whispered April. "But where else could she be?
What other place? . . ."
Then she understood. There was no other place. . . . Her knees
trembled, and the stewardess supported her to the sofa. She sat down
with chattering teeth, smitten by a great and bitter cold. Diana--the
sea . . . warm, merry, gay Diana in the cold sea!
"I don't believe it. It can't be true!"
"Mrs. Stanislaw had reason to think that she intended to commit suicide
tonight . . . and when she did not come to bed by two o'clock, she
thought it her duty to inform the Captain, who is, of course, bound to
search the ship."
"It can't be true. . . . I don't believe it," repeated April
mechanically; but all the time her heart was in terror, remembering
Diana's pale looks and the news she had heard tonight of Bellew's
marriage. Had he told Diana, then . . . and was this the result? All
at once it became impossible to sit still any longer. She must know
the truth. She jumped up, searched feverishly for a cloak to put on,
and pulling the stewardess with her, hurried on deck. But after a few
steps they came to a standstill, for the crowd following the Captain
had suddenly and curiously broken up and separated before the door of
one of the deck cabins. Men and women who a moment before had been
clustering and whispering agitatedly together were now hurrying past,
each apparently intent on reaching their own cabins in the quickest
time possible. For one horrible moment April thought it was some
tragic discovery that was scattering them, but a moment later she
realized that tragedy had gone from the air. The deck was flooded with
electric light, and people's faces could plainly be seen. Many
expressions were written there, but none of pity or sorrow. The men,
for the most part, looked embarrassed; the women's expressions varied
from frozen hauteur to scornful rage. They behaved like people who had
been bitterly wronged by some lying tale. The one predominating
emotion shared by all seemed to be an intense desire to escape from the
scene. In less than two minutes not a soul was left on the deck save
the dazed and astounded April. She remained, wondering what on earth
it was all about; why without visible reason the search had come to
such a sudden end, and what could be the meaning of the phrase Mrs.
Stanislaw had flung at her as she passed.
"The April fool has surpassed herself!"
A sickening apprehension crept over the girl. That Diana was not
overboard seemed certain; but what new folly had she committed? As if
in answer to the gloomy query, the lights were once more switched out,
and a strange vapoury greyness took possession of the ship. It was
that still small hour when the yellowing East adds pallor to the night
without dispersing its darkness.
Then two things happened. The door of that cabin before which the
crowd had so mysteriously disintegrated opened very softly, and through
the aperture stole forth a woman's figure. . . . For a swift moment
the light from within rested on yellow hair and gleaming blue satin;
then the door closed and the figure became part of the stealing dimness
which was neither night nor morning. But April, who stood in her path,
had seen and recognized.
"Diana!" she cried.
The other girl stood stock still. Her face showed ghostly in the
greyness. She peered at April, clutching at her arm and whispering:
"For God's sake take me to your cabin!"
They crept down the deck like a pair of thieves, hardly breathing till
they were behind the locked door. Without looking at her, April saw
that there was trouble to meet. She remembered the faces of the other
women, and the instinct to protect a fellow-creature against the mob
rose in her.
"Tell me what it is. I'll help you fight it out."
But Diana had flung herself down with a defiant air on the sofa.
"Don't you know? Weren't you one of the hounds on my track?" she
demanded, in a high-pitched whisper. April looked at her steadily.
"The whole thing is an absolute mystery to me. I know nothing except
that first you were missing, and then apparently they found you----"
"Yes; in Geoffrey Bellew's cabin!"
The April fool had, indeed, surpassed herself! April blenched, but she
took the blow standing. After all, she had been as great a fool as the
girl sitting there, for she, too, had handed over her good name into
the careless hands of another; had sold her reputation for a song--a
song that had lasted seventeen days, but seemed now in the act of
becoming a dirge.
"Do you mind telling me what happened, so that I know exactly where we
stand and what there is to be done."
Diana laughed.
"There is nothing to be done."
April forgave her the laugh, because it was not composed of merriment
nor any elements of joyousness.
"I went to Geoffrey's cabin because we had things to talk over, and it
seemed the only place where we could get away from prying eyes.
Somehow I stayed on and on, not realizing it was so late . . . and
then, and then . . ." She began to stammer; defiance left her . . .
"then, that awful knocking . . . those faces staring in! . . . all
those brutes of women!" She covered her eyes with her hands and broke
down utterly. "My God! I am done for!"
April thought so, too. It seemed to her they were both done for, but
there was not much help in saying so. Diana's confession horrified
her, and she saw that her own future at the Cape was knocked as flat as
a house of cards that is demolished by the wayward hand of a child.
Yet at that moment her principal feeling was one of compassion for the
girl on the sofa, who alternately laughed and covered her eyes, and now
with a pitiful attempt at bravado was attempting to light a cigarette,
with hands that shook like aspen leaves.
"I suppose it was that cat Stanislaw who started the search for me?"
"It appears that she got into a panic when you did not return to your
cabin, and went and told the Captain she feared you were overboard."
"The she-fiend! Much she cared if I was at the bottom of the sea! She
had pried out where I was, and that was her subtle way of advertising
it to the whole ship."
"I believe you are right," said April slowly, "though it is hard to
understand how any one could do a thing so studiedly cruel."
"Cruel! She is a fiend, I tell you," cried Diana. "One of those women
who have nothing left in their natures but hatred for those who are
still young and pretty. I realized long ago that she would ruin my
reputation if she could, but I did not give her credit for so much
cleverness."
"Well, at any rate, she is not so clever as she thinks," said April
drily. "For she hasn't ruined your reputation, after all; only mine."
Diana started; terror came into her eyes.
"My God, April! You don't mean to give me away?"
April knew very well what she meant to do. She had tasted of "the
triumph and the roses and the wine," and the bill had been presented.
Even though it left her bankrupt and disgraced, she was going to honour
that bill; but she could not resist finding out what point of view was
held by Diana as to similar obligations.
"You think, then, it is _my_ name that should be left with the smirch
on it?" she asked dispassionately.
Diana grew crimson and then very pale.
"The scandal . . ." she stammered; "my people . . . you don't know what
it would mean to have such a story attached to me."
"It would be better to have it attached to me, of course," April
agreed, with an irony that was entirely wasted on Diana.
"You see that, don't you?" she said eagerly. "After all, nobody knows
your name, and it will soon be forgotten. But mine----"
April could only smile. She saw that pity was entirely wasted here.
Diana was so eminently able to look after herself when it came to the
matter of self-preservation.
"And it will only be for another couple of days. After that we shall
never see Mrs. Stanislaw or any of this rotten crew of women again."
"You are an optimist," was April's only comment. "After all, it is I
who will have to bear the brunt of their insolence tomorrow, whatever
name I go under," complained Diana.
"I'm afraid I cannot give you my face as well as my name to help you
bear it," said April drily. Unexpectedly the retort pierced, for Diana
suddenly burst into tears.
"I know you think me a beast. But I really _am_ thinking more of my
father than of myself. He is terribly proud. It would break his heart
to hear this story of me being found in a man's cabin. Oh! How could
I have done such an awful thing! You think I don't care, but I can
tell you I could simply die of shame."
April was softened once more.
"Don't cry, Diana, and don't worry any further. Of course, your name
shall never come out. That is quite settled. Come, now, and let me
help you into bed. You had far better stay here than face that tigress
Stanislaw in her den."
Nevertheless, when she had safely tucked the still weeping and
collapsed Diana into her berth, she thought it advisable to make an
excursion herself to the den of the tigress, ostensibly to fetch
Diana's night-things; in reality to let her know where Diana was
spending the night, and that the girl had one woman friend at least to
stand by her. Even as she expected, Mrs. Stanislaw was awake and lying
in wait, ready to spring. It must have been a disagreeable surprise to
see April instead of the victim. The former's manner was all suavity.
"I am sorry to disturb you, but I have come for Miss Poole's things.
She is not at all well, and I have persuaded her to spend the night
with me." Tranquilly she began to collect night-wear, slippers, hair
and tooth brushes. The tigress, being thoroughly taken back, could do
nothing for the moment but breathe heavily and glare. April, with the
wisdom of the serpent, made haste to escape before the feline creature
regained the use of claw and fang.
But there were worse things to face in the morning. Even though Diana
postponed the evil hour by pretending she was ill and having her
breakfast in bed, she could not stay in the cabin for ever. Once the
first days of seasickness are over there is a rule against people
stopping in their berths all day except under doctor's orders, and the
stewardesses are very rigid in enforcing this. Besides, the Captain
and first officer inspect cabins between ten and eleven A.M., and Diana
had no particular yearning to see them again just then.
April went down to breakfast as usual, outwardly composed, but with an
eye secretly alert to spy out the land. It did not take her long to
discover that all the women were in arms, with their stabbing knives
ready for action. Mrs. Stanislaw had evidently not been idle, and the
name of "Lady Diana" was already bracketed with that of the April Fool.
To send her entirely to Coventry was rather too drastic treatment for
an earl's daughter, but many a cold glance came her way.
"Birds of a feather nest together," was one of the tart observations
that fell upon her ears as she passed a group of women who only
yesterday were fawning upon her. Plainly it was considered a fresh
outrage upon womanhood that she should have given the protection of her
name and cabin to the heroine of last night's scandal.
She did not mind very much. With a clear conscience on this count at
least, she was able to meet their displeasure imperturbably. But she
could not help feeling sorry for the real Diana.
That unfortunate creature, on venturing forth to her own cabin, was met
by the sight of Mrs. Stanislaw dragging all her possessions into the
corridor. It appeared that even for the few remaining days at sea the
tigress could not lie down with the black sheep! A sweet and
sympathetic soul, who also lived down the same alley and had the same
horror of contaminating influence, had therefore offered to take her
in. The picturesque incident was being witnessed and silently approved
by women in the neighbouring cabins, who, curiously enough, all
happened to be busy packing with their doors open, so as not to miss
anything.
It must be remembered that most of these people had been persistently
flouted, even insulted, by Diana during the voyage. Some of them,
matrons with daughters of their own, were really shocked by the "bad
example" her behaviour had established. So it was perhaps not to be
wondered at that a sort of combined sniff of holiness and
self-righteousness went up to Heaven when the culprit came barging down
the passage, nose in air, and a defiant flush upon her cheek.
Stumbling over the trunks and piles of clothes which littered the
place, she managed to gain her room, and close the door behind her with
a resounding bang to show how little she cared about any of them. But
it was immediately reopened by Mrs. Stanislaw, come to fetch more of
her things, and not averse to talking as long as possible over the
business. By continually going backwards and forwards for small
armfuls of articles, and always leaving the door open, she managed to
deprive Diana of all privacy. The latter bore with it for as long as
her patience lasted, which was about five minutes. Then she flung out
of the room, hoping to find refuge elsewhere. But wherever she went it
was the same. In the writing-room everyone bent suddenly over their
blotting-pads, and the balmy morning air took on an arctic chill.
Music and conversation faded away when she sauntered into the music
saloon. On deck even the sailors looked at her curiously. The story
of her indiscretion had penetrated to every corner of the vessel. The
miserable girl fetched a book from the library and tried to hide
herself behind it, seated in her deck-chair. She soon had that side of
the ship to herself.
Later, it was discovered that a lady with whom she was engaged to play
off a final in deck quoits had "scratched." The same thing happened
with regard to the bridge-drive. The girl who was cast as her opponent
in the opening round publicly withdrew her name from the competition.
There it was, up on the games notice-board--a girl's name with a black
pencil mark drawn through it. All who ran might read, and a good many
did run to read. Clearly the April Fool had become the object of the
most unanimous taboo ever set in motion on a ship. Her name was mud.
Even the men did not rally to her aid, though she had been popular
enough with them before. There are few men who will not crumple up
before a phalanx of women with daggers in their hands and feathers in
their hair; even as the big-game hunter thinks it no shame to flee
before a horde of singing ants! The only two who behaved with natural
decency were Bellew and Sarle. The latter appeared utterly unconscious
of anything unusual when he came and sat down by the two girls. There
might have been a little more deference in his manner to Diana; that
was all. As for Bellew, he had not been trained in the diplomatic
service for nothing. He possessed to a marked degree the consummate
sang-froid that is a natural attribute of aides-de-camp. Nothing could
have been more cool than his manner when he joined the group and
suggested a game of quoits. The whole world of the ship had its ears
cocked to listen to these two, and was watching them acutely--with eyes
that gazed at the horizon. If only Diana could have comported herself
in a rational manner the situation might at least have been decently
salvaged, if not carried with triumph. But she had lost her nerve.
Intrepid throughout the voyage in committing every possible folly, now,
when a little real courage was needed, she crumpled. The fierce white
light of public disapproval withered her. It was pitiful to see the
way she went to pieces--to hear her hysterical laughter and foolish
remarks.
"For goodness' sake have the courage of your sins! Show some blood!"
was the rebuke April longed to administer together with a sound
shaking. But anger was futile, and rebuke out of the question. The
only wise thing was to retreat in as good order as possible to the
cabin of which Diana now enjoyed sole possession, and there reconsider
the position.
"I can't bear it," she whimpered desperately. "I can't stand another
two days of it. I tell you I shall go mad."
"Nonsense!" April responded, with a cheerfulness that found no echo in
her heart. "You must take a pull on yourself, Diana. As you said last
night, you owe these women nothing, and will probably never see them
again."
But Diana's lay had changed tune.
"Oh! Won't I? . . . I feel they will haunt me all my days. What is
that couplet?--
"He who hath a thousand friends hath not a friend to spare;
But he who hath one enemy shall meet him everywhere."
A man said to me yesterday that what is done on the voyage to the Cape
is known at Cairo within a week if it is sufficiently scandalous." She
wept.
"A blue look-out for me!" thought her listener, dismally imagining the
name of April Poole flashing from one end of the great continent to
another. Not only at the Cape would she be debarred from earning her
living! This impression was confirmed by some of the remarks women
made to her later in the day. They were all quite willing to be
friendly as long as she was not in the company of the black sheep.
"She might just as well take ship back to England," one said. "No one
will employ her as a governess after this. The story will be all over
Cape Town within an hour of our arrival."
"You can't live these things down in Africa," said another. "Of
course, she might get a job up-country, where people are not particular
and only want a kind of servant to look after their children."
It was no use April protesting against the cruelty of condemning a girl
for ever because of one indiscretion. Her listeners only looked at her
suspiciously. One old Englishwoman, who had lived many years in South
Africa, put the case more cynically than kindly:
"Girls who earn their living are not allowed the luxury of
indiscretion. If it had been _you_, now----"
"Do you mean that I should have been forgiven by reason of my position?"
"My dear," was the dry reply, "it is the same old snobbish world
wherever you go. What constitutes a crime in one strata of society is
only eccentricity in another."
April communicated the gist of this worldly wisdom to Diana, half
hoping that it might give the latter courage to disclose herself and
perhaps clear them both of any worse indictment than upon the count of
foolishness. But it was a futile hope, and nothing came of it except
more tears and another wild appeal not to be "given away." All sense
of justice had left Diana, or been swamped by the newly-born fear for
her family's honour.
Thus the miserable day wore to its close. A steward, no doubt heavily
subsidized, spent most of the afternoon carrying notes backwards and
forwards between Diana and Bellew. April stayed in her cabin as much
as possible, and for the rest was careful to be always near other
people, so that Sarle would find no opportunity of giving expression to
the things to be seen in his eyes. It was a precarious joy to read
those sweet things, but she dared not let him utter them. For when the
debacle came at Cape Town, he must have nothing to regret. The moment
they were quit of the ship and its scandal she would be relieved of her
promise to Diana and able to tell him the truth. If he had spoken no
word of love to her before then he would be free as air to go his way
without speaking one, while she just slipped away and disappeared, to
be seen of him no more. But if he chose not to go his ways----? If
when he heard all he still wished to stay? Ah! what a sweet, perilous
thought was that! She dared not dwell on it, and yet if she banished
it utterly from her mind all the thrill went out of life, and every
throb of the engine bringing them nearer land seemed a beat of her
heart soon to be silenced for ever.
Evening came at last--an evening of dinner parties and best frocks,
with an early commencement of the bridge-drive afterwards. Sarle,
several days before, had arranged to have a special small table for
four with a special dinner, asking April to be his hostess and choose
the other two guests. She, with an instinct that they would be left
out in the cold by everyone else, had chosen Diana and Bellew. Now, at
the last moment, Diana shirked the ordeal, and from behind her locked
door announced in muffled tones that she had a headache and was going
to bed. So April sent a message to Sarle, giving him the chance of
filling the gap if he so wished. When she went down she found him
waiting for her with Bellew and Dick Nichols, the old poker-playing,
battle-scarred warrior of the smoke-room, whose acquaintance she was
delighted to make. He was a little bit shy at first at sitting down in
his worn though spotless white-duck slacks opposite the beautiful girl
in black and silver, with straps of amethysts across her satiny
shoulders. But she had that gift which is born rather than acquired of
setting people at their ease, and she wanted to get the liking of this
man who was Sarle's friend. So she beguiled him by the blue of her
eyes and the eager interest of her smile, and he opened up like a book
of strange stories and pictures under the hand of a child. Listening
to the talk, she was transported to that strange region of bush and
spaces that is far from being enchanted land and yet casts an
everlasting spell. She heard lions roar and the shuffling steps of
oxen plodding through dust; felt the brazen glare of the sun against
her eyes; saw the rain swishing down on grass that grew taller than a
man's head.
She remembered a verse of Percival Gibbon's about the veld:
There's a balm for crippled spirits
In the open view
Running from your very footsteps
Out into the blue,
Like a wagon track to heaven
Straight 'twixt God and you.
Both Sarle and Nichols knew that track, she was sure. They were oddly
alike, these two veld men, with their gentle ways, their brown muscular
hands, and their eyes full of distance. A very different type to the
sleek and handsome Bellew, who sat so composed under the many blighting
glances cast his way.
"They know about the guile of creatures, but he has made an art of
beguiling human beings," thought April, and all the vexation of the day
came surging over her, almost spoiling her dinner and the pleasure of
the evening. Almost--not quite! When you are "young and very sweet,
with the jasmine in your hair," and have only to raise your eyes to see
desire of you sitting unashamed in the eyes of the man you love,
nothing can quite spoil your gladness of living. All the same, she
stuck to the card-room the whole evening, and her resolution to give
Sarle no chance of saying anything he might regret. He must have
realized it after a time, when she had once or twice eluded his little
plots to get her on deck, but he gave no sign. He was a hunter, and
could bide his time with patience and serenity.
It was not in her plan that when they parted it should be just where
the shadows of a funnel fell, nor that he should leave a swift kiss, in
the palm of the hand she tendered him in bidding good-night; yet both
of these things came to pass.
* * * * * *
The stewardess who brought her an early cup of tea handed her a letter
with the remark:
"It was under your door, m'lady. And please would you like your big
trunks from the hold brought here, or will you pack in the
baggage-room?"
"Oh, here, I think, stewardess. It will be much more convenient."
"Of course it will," agreed the good woman. "But, there! how the
baggage men do grumble at having to lug up big trunks like yours and
Mr. Bellew's!"
"I am very sorry," said April "but I'm afraid I can't help it." She
had reflected swiftly that as she and Diana had so many possessions to
exchange before packing, it could only be done in the privacy of he
cabin. She was very tired after a "white night" all too crowded with
the black butterflies of unhappy thought, and when she looked at the
superscription on the envelope and saw that it was in Diana's writing
she sighed. All the worries of the coming day rose up before her like
a menacing wall with broken glass on the top.
"Blow Diana! I wish she were at the bottom of the sea," she said to
herself, with the irritability born of a bad night.
Leaning on her elbow, she sipped at the fragrant tea and reflected
sorrowfully on what a happy creature she would have been that morning
if she had never met Diana Vernilands and entered into the mad plan of
exchanging identities! What a clear and straight road would have lain
before her! . . . with the man whose kiss still burnt the palm of her
hand waiting for her at the end of it! But instead--what? She sighed
again and tears came into her eyes as she lay back on the pillows and
tore open the envelope. Then suddenly her body lying there so soft and
delicate in the luxurious berth stiffened with horror. The tears froze
in her eyes. The letter at which she was staring was composed of two
loose and separate pages, on the first of which was scrawled a couple
of brief sentences signed by a name:
"_I cannot bear it any longer. I am going to end my troubles in the
sea._
"APRIL POOLE."
Mechanically her clutch relaxed on this terrible first page, and she
turned to the second. It was headed: "_absolutely private and
confidential, to be destroyed immediately after reading,_" and the
words heavily underscored; then came wild phrases meant for April's
private eyes alone.
"I am leaving you to face it all. For God's sake forgive me and keep
your promise. Never let any one on the ship or in Africa know the
truth. Spare my poor father the agony of having his name dragged in
the dust as well as losing his daughter. Do not do anything except
under the counsel of _the other person_ on this ship who knows the
truth and who will advise you the exact course to take. But do not
approach him in any way or speak of this to him until all the misery
and excitement of my suicide is over. I have written to him, too, and
he will advise you at the right time, but to drag him into this would
only ruin his career, and earn my curse for ever. I trust you utterly
in all this. Oh, April, do not betray my trust! Do not fail me! I
beg and implore you with my last breath to do as I ask. Go on using my
name, and money, and everything belonging to me until the moment that
_he_ advises you to either write my father the truth or return to
England and break it to him personally. If he hears it in any other
way it will kill him, and his blood be on your soul as well as mine. I
pray, I beseech, I implore you, be faithful to your unhappy friend,
"DIANA."
It took a long time for April's stricken mind to absorb the meaning of
it all. Over and over she read the blurred tear-blistered sentences,
sometimes weeping, sometimes painfully muttering them aloud to herself.
When she had finished at last, her course was set, her mind made up.
She knew the letter by heart, and sitting up in bed, white as a ghost,
she slowly destroyed it into minutest atoms, putting them into a little
purse that lay in the rack beside her. Then she rang the bell. To the
stewardess who came she said calmly, but with pallid lips:
"If Miss Poole is in her cabin, ask her to come to me."
Then she whipped out of bed, flung on a wrapper, and arranged her hair.
When the woman returned, she knew the answer before it was spoken.
"Miss Poole is not in her cabin. Her bed has not been slept in."
"Ask the Captain to come here."
In a few moments it was all over. The Captain had come and gone again,
with the first page of Diana's letter in his hand. The procedure after
that was much the same as it had been two nights before, except that
the Captain went alone on his search, and the result, with the evidence
he held in his hand, was a foregone conclusion from the first. All
inquiry terminated in the same answer. No one had set eyes on "Miss
Poole" since the previous evening. The last person to speak with her
was the stewardess, who, on finding she did not intend going to dinner,
had offered to bring her some, but had been refused. The rest was
conjecture--a riddle that only the sea, lying as blue and flat and
still as the sea in a gaudy oleograph, could answer. The story had
flown round the ship like wildfire, and hardly a soul but felt as if he
or she had taken part in a murder. Women reproached each other and
themselves, and men went sombre-eyed to the smoke-room and ordered
drinks that left them still dry-mouthed. The blue and golden day with
the perfumes of Africa spicing its breath took on a brazen and arid
look. It was as if old Mother Africa had already reached out her
brazen hand and dealt a blow, just to remind everyone on the boat that
she was there waiting for them, perhaps with a tragedy for each in her
Pandora box. The Captain had not let it be known where and with whom
Diana's last note had been found. With the remembrance of April's
ashen face as she had handed it to him, he wished to spare the girl as
much as possible.
As for her, the one clear thought in her mind was that she must obey
Diana's last behest and keep silence. It was not hard to do that, for
she had no words. Throughout the day, in a kind of mental torpor, she
helped the stewardess sort and pack all the costly clothes and
possessions which were really Diana's, putting them into the trunks
already labelled for a hotel in Cape Town; her own things were locked
and sealed up in the abandoned cabin on the lower deck, and she would
probably never see them again. She did not attempt to speak to Bellew,
though she knew that an interview with him awaited her, for there could
be no mistake about his being that _other person_ referred to in
Diana's letter. Neither did she see Vereker Sarle. He sent a note
during the afternoon, a very sweet and friendly note, hoping that she
was not ill, and begging her not to be too upset by the tragedy. And
between the lines she read as he meant her to do.
"Why are you hiding from me? Come on deck. I want you."
She wanted him, too. She longed for the comfort of his presence, but
did not dare meet him. A greater barrier than ever existed between
them. The dead girl stood there with her finger on her lips. The
truth could not now be told to Sarle, until, at any rate, it was known
to that unhappy old man in England whose head must be bowed in sorrow
to the grave. After that, who could tell?
Somehow she felt that all hope of personal happiness with Vereker Sarle
was over. It was unfit that so clean-souled and upright a man should
be involved in the tangle of lies and deceit and tragedy that she and
Diana had between them encompassed. He would shrink from her when he
knew all, of that she felt certain, and it made her shrink in turn to
think of it. So she sent only a little formal line in answer to his
note, making no reference to the likelihood of seeing him on deck or
anywhere else. It looked cold and cruel enough to her, that note, like
a little knife she was sending him; but it was a two-edged knife, with
which she also wounded herself.
The stewardess brought her tea and toast, and she stayed in her room
all day. Only in the cool of the evening, when everyone else was
dining, she crept out for a few moments, and leaned upon the ship's
rail, drinking in the air and staring at the moody line of land ahead
that meant fresh experiences and trouble on the morrow! She was afraid
to look at the sea!
No farewell concert took place that night. People whispered together
in little groups for a while after dinner, but all the merriment of the
last night at sea was lost in the sense of tragedy that hung about the
ship. Almost everyone was oppressed by a feeling of guilty
responsibility for what had happened. The inherent decency of human
nature asserted itself, and each one thought:
"Why did I not give the poor girl a helping hand instead of driving her
to desperation?" It was remembered that "Lady Diana" had stood by her,
and everyone yearned to absolve their souls by explanation to the
person who (to her great regret) bore that rank and title. But she had
put a barricade of stewardesses between her and them, and was invisible
to callers. Some few of the younger and more resilient passengers, in
an effort to shake off what seemed to them useless gloom, went and
asked the Captain to allow the band to play on deck. He consented,
stipulating only that there should be no dancing. Of course, no one
wanted to dance, but as ships' bands specialize in dance music, the
musicians struck at once into a tango, and it happened to be the one
Diana had made her own by singing her little French rhyme to it:
"Tout le monde
Au salon
On y tan-gue, on y tan-gue."
It only needed that. Every mind instantly conjured up the picture of a
vivid figure in a frock that gleamed blue as sulphurous flames. A
hysterical woman sprang up screaming shrilly, and had to be taken away;
a solitary sea gull, its plumage shining with a weird blueness in the
electric light, chose this moment to fly low along the deck, crying its
wailing cry. That was enough. Another woman began to scream; the
music stopped, and there was almost a panic to get away from a spot
that seemed haunted. In a little while the first-class deck was as
deserted as the deck of a derelict, and the ship was wrapped in
silence. The personality of the April Fool seemed more imposing in
death than it had been in life!
By morning the _Clarendon Castle_ had reached her destined port, and
lay snugly berthed in Cape Town docks. April, venturing out at the tip
of dawn to get a first glimpse of Africa, found that a great mountain
wrapped in a mantle of mist stood in the way. It seemed almost as if
by reaching out a hand she could touch the dark sides of it, so close
it reared, and so bleak it brooded above her. Yet she knew this to be
an illusion of the atmosphere, for between her and the mountain's base
lay the streets and little white houses and gardens of Cape Town. It
might have been some southern town on the shores of the Mediterranean
except for that mountain, which made it unlike any other place in the
world. The "Table of the Mass," the Portuguese named it, and when, as
now, silver mists unrolled themselves upon the flat top and streamed in
veils down the gaunt sides, they said that the cloth was spread for the
Sacred Feast.
April thought of all the great wanderers whose first sight of Africa
must inevitably have been the same as hers--this mysterious mountain
standing like a grey witch across the path! Drake sighted it from afar
in 1580; Diaz was obliged to turn back from it by his mutinying
sailors; Livingstone, Stanley, Cecil Rhodes, "Doctor Jim," all the
great adventurers, and thousands of lesser ones, had looked upon it,
and gone past it, to their sorrow. For if history be true, none can
ever come out from behind that brooding witch untouched by sorrow.
They may grow great, they may reap gold or laurels, or their heart's
desire; but in the reaping and the gaining their souls will know grey
sorrow. A rhyme of her childhood came unsolicited into April's mind:
How many miles to Banbury?
Three score and ten.
Will I be there by candlelight?
Yes, and back again:
Only--_mind the old witch by the way_!
She shivered, but the sun burst like a sudden glorious warrior upon the
world, dispersing fear, and making her feel as though, after all,
everything and everyone was young, and all life decked out in spring
array. If only the burden of deceit had not been upon her, how blithe
and strong in hope could she have set foot in this new land.
As she turned to go back to her cabin she found Geoffrey Bellew by her
side. He appeared a little haggard, and some of his habitual
self-assurance was missing. No doubt he had seen Table Mountain on
former visits to Africa, yet he looked at it rather than into the eyes
of the girl he addressed.
"Will you go to the Mount Nelson Hotel?" he said in a low tone. "I can
meet you there, and we will talk matters over."
"When?" she said. Spring went out of her. "Where is the hotel?"
He reflected for a moment.
"Well, perhaps you had better give yourself into my charge. I will see
you through the Customs, and drive you up afterwards, and make all
arrangements--shall I?"
She consented. It seemed as good a plan as any for avoiding bother,
and had the recommendation that it would keep off Vereker Sarle. So,
later, when crowds began to surge and heave upon the ship, everyone mad
with excitement at meeting their friends, and mountains of luggage
barging in every direction, she stayed close by the side of this man
she disliked intensely, yet whose smooth ability to deal with men and
matters she could not but admire. Obstacles fell down like ninepins
before him; stewards ran after him; officials waited upon him; his
baggage, the heaviest and most cumbersome on the ship, was the first to
go down the gangway, and April's with it. A few hurried farewells, and
she found herself seated beside him in an open landau, driving behind a
conveyance full of trunks towards the Customs House. A dull pain
burned within her at the remembrance of Sarle's face. He had looked
from her to Bellew with those steady eyes that saw so much and betrayed
so little, merely remarking, as he took the hand she tendered lightly
in farewell:
"One doesn't say good-bye in Africa, Lady Diana, only 'So
long'--meaning that we may meet again tomorrow, perhaps even today."
He had not even looked after them as they left the ship. Yet April,
because she loved him, was aware of his astonishment at this strange
and sudden intimacy of hers with Bellew. Still, what was the use of
caring? There were worse hurts in store for him, if, indeed, they met
again as he predicted. She bit on the bullet and ignored the pain at
her heart. Bellew did not waste any small talk on her; that was one
comfort. He seemed to be more concerned about his luggage than about
her, shouting out to the coloured men to be careful and to remove
nothing from the van without his direction. At the Customs House, in
fact, all his stuff was left assiduously alone. April's was opened and
gone through rapidly by the officials; but the production of his papers
and credentials as an attache to the Governor of Zambeke, or some such
outlandish place, gave Bellew instant immunity, and no single article
of his belongings was unlocked. Within a few moments they were again
_en route_ for their hotel.
Their way took them by the main thoroughfare of the town, and April was
astonished at the numbers of people flocking on the pavements, filling
trams and rickshaws, drinking tea on the overhanging balconies and
restaurants. The air was sunny, yet with the fresh bite of the sea in
it, and everyone seemed gay and careless. The whole of one side of the
wide street was lined by Malays and natives offering flowers for sale.
In front of the Bank a sort of floral bazaar was established, the
bright head "dookies," silver bangles, and glowing dark eyes of the
vendors making a brave show above the massed glory of colour in their
baskets. Huge bunches of pink proteas, spiked lilies of every hue,
bales of heather and waxen white chinckerichees filled the air with
heavy perfume. The sellers came pressing to the passing carriages,
soliciting custom in the soft clipped speech of the Cape native.
Bellew, for all he was so distrait, had the graceful inspiration to
stop and take on a load of colour and perfume, and April for a moment
lost count of her troubles in sheer joy of the senses.
"But where do they come from?" she cried. "I have never seen such
flowers in the world."
"There _are_ no flowers in the world like those from Table Mountain,"
he said.
"That old bleak beast?" She gazed in astonishment at the grey mass
still hovering above and about them. "She looks as though nothing
would grow on her gaunt sides except sharp flints."
Bellew laughed.
"Those gaunt sides are covered with beauty, and hundreds of people make
their living from them."
"Africa is wonderful," sighed April, and suddenly the weight of her
burden returned.
"Africa's all right, if it weren't for the people in it," he retorted
moodily.
The hotel proved to be a picturesque building perched on rising ground
above lovely gardens. Some of its countless windows looked over the
town to the sea; but most of them seemed to be peered into by the
relentless granite eyes of the mountain. April's first act was to draw
the blinds of her room.
"That mountain will sit upon my heart and crush me into my grave if I
stay here long," she thought, and felt despairing. Bellew had engaged
rooms for her, boldly inscribing the name of "Lady Diana Vernilands" in
the big ledger, while she stood by, acquiescing in, if not contributing
to the lie. Afterwards he went away to superintend the unloading of
his luggage. It appeared that his three immense trunks contained much
valuable glass and china for the Governor's wife, and he was taking no
risks concerning their safety.
Although making only a short stay, and in spite of the glum looks of
the porters, he had everything carried carefully up to his room on the
fourth floor. Glum looks were wasted on the bland Bellew, who lived by
the motto "_Je m'en fiche de tout le monde_," and who on his own
confession would have liked Africa to himself.
No word concerning the tragedy had yet passed between him and April,
but she knew that something was impending, and that she would probably
do as he told her, for he seemed in the strange circumstances to occupy
the position of sole executor to Diana's will. On going down to lunch
she found that he had engaged a small table for them both, but was not
there himself. What pleased her less was that as regards company she
might just as well have been back on board the _Clarendon Castle_.
Almost every one of her fellow-passengers was scattered around the
multiplicity of small tables. It would seem as if the "Mount Nelson"
was the only hotel in the town, although she remembered quite a number
of others in the Directory. Even Vereker Sarle was there. Far down
the long room she saw him sitting with two other men: one of them, Dick
Nichols, looking very much at home; the other a distinguished,
saturnine man with an English air to him, in spite of being burnt as
black as the ace of spades. She was aware that Sarle saw her, and had
a trembling fear that he might join her. It was almost a relief when
Bellew came in towards the end of the meal, for she knew he would prove
an effective barrier. He looked hot and weary, and explained that he
had been obliged to go back down town to attend to some business.
"I think you had better take up your quarters here for a time," he
added. She flinched at the prospect.
"But why? It is so public! Everyone off the boat seems to be here,
and I shall have to keep on telling lies just because I know them. It
seems to me I can't open my mouth without telling a lie, and," she
finished desperately, "it makes me sick."
He looked at her coldly. His fine brown eyes could be hard as flint.
"I thought it was a promise--some sort of a compact--to do what was
best--_for her_?" he remarked. A little cold wave of the sea seemed to
creep over her soul, and she could see her hands trembling as she dealt
with the fruit on her plate.
"Very well," she acquiesced tonelessly, at last; "if you think it best.
How long am I to stay?"
"Until next week's mail-boat sails," he said slowly. "I have been down
to see if I could get you a berth on this week's, but she is full up."
"You want me to return to England?" There was desperate resistance in
her voice now. She had not realized until that moment how much she
wished to stay.
"It is not what _I_ want: it is for her," he insisted ruthlessly. "You
must go to her father and explain everything. Letters are no good."
She was silent, but her eyes were wretched. She wanted to stay in
Africa.
"After all, it is your share of the payment for folly," he pursued
relentlessly. That was too much for her temper.
"And yours?" she flashed back.
His face did not change, but his voice became very gentle.
"Don't worry. I too am paying."
She would have given much to recall her fierce retort then, for after
all, it was true that she was not the only one hit. This man too was
suffering under his mask. He had loved Diana, and that his love was
the direct cause of the tragedy must make his wretchedness the more
acute. With an impulse of pity and understanding she put out her hand
to him across the table, but instead of taking it he passed her a
little dish of salted almonds. Mortified, she looked up in time to see
Sarle and his friends going by, and was left wondering how much they
had witnessed, and whether Bellew had meant to snub or spare her. The
whole thing was a miserable mix-up, and it almost seemed to her as if
Diana had as usual got the best of it, for at any rate she was out of
the deceit and discomfort.
She thought so still more when the women surrounded her in the lounge,
and drew her in among them to take coffee. They were all as merry as
magpies, and seemed to have clean forgotten the tragedy of the ship
except in so far as it lent a thrill to conversation. Several who were
going on the next day to different parts of the country pressed her to
visit them at their homes. Mrs. Stanislaw came up with her claws
sheathed in silk and a strange woman in tow, and murmuring: "I _must_
introduce Mrs. Janis. She is anxious to know all you can tell her of
poor Miss Poole," stood smiling with a feline delight in the encounter.
April turned from her bitter face to the other woman, an
elaborately-dressed shrew with a domineering hook to her nose, and had
the thankful feeling of a mouse who has just missed by a hair's breadth
the click of the trap on its nose.
"I'm afraid I can give you no more information than is already
available," she said distantly.
"It seems to be a most shameful affair," complained Mrs. Janis; "and
the wretched girl apparently has no relatives one can write to."
"None," stated April firmly and gratefully. She could well imagine how
this lady with a grievance would treat the feelings of relations.
"Perhaps Captain Bellew might know of someone," purred Mrs. Stanislaw.
"You had better ask him." It was April's turn to smile, though wryly
enough. "He will deal with you without the gloves," she thought, and
turned away from them.
The lounge was a pleasant place, with French windows leading into the
garden; deep chairs and palms were scattered everywhere, and it smelled
fragrantly of coffee and cigars. Groups of men and women clustered
about the small tables, smoking and talking. One corner was fenced off
by a little counter, from behind which a distinguished-looking waiter
dispensed cocktails and liqueurs with the air of a duke bestowing
decorations. This was Leon, who knew the pet drinks and secret sins of
everyone in South Africa, but whose discreet eyes told nothing. The
knowledge he possessed of men, women, and things would have made a
fascinating volume, but no one had been able to unseal his lips. He
hardly ever spoke, simply mixing the drinks and indicating with his
hand the tables to which they should be carried. April was in the
presence of a personage without being aware of it. Neither did she
know until much later that this pleasant lounge was one of the
principal gossip centres of the country. In its smoky atmosphere many
a fair reputation has withered away, many a great name been tarnished
for ever. As for the baby scandals that are born there, have legs and
arms and wings stuck on to them and are sent anteloping or flying all
over the country, their name is legion!
Bellew had left her immediately after lunch. He said that he had an
appointment with an old friend of his mother's, and should be leaving
to stay with her for several days before continuing his journey. April
had, in fact, from her seat in the lounge seen him come out of the lift
into the hall accompanied by a little bent old lady, and watched them
drive away together in a taxi. Thereafter she breathed more freely,
and a longing to be in the open air out of this smoke-laden atmosphere
moved her to extricate herself from the chattering crowd of women and
make her way to the veranda. It was cool and fresh there under the
stone porticoes, with veils of green creepers hanging between her and
the blazing sunshine and colour of the garden. She sat down, and, as
is always the way with a woman in moments of silence and beauty, her
thoughts immediately clustered about the image of the man she loved.
What was Vereker Sarle thinking of her? Would he go from the Cape to
his home up north without trying to see her again? While she pondered
these things he walked out through one of the tall French windows and
came towards her, followed by his dark, saturnine friend. They
approached like men sure of a welcome, Sarle smiling in his disarmingly
boyish fashion, the other man smiling too: but with a difference.
There was some quality of sardonic amusement and curiosity in his
glance that arrested April's instant attention.
"I warned you that it is hard to shake off your friends in this
country," said Sarle gaily. "May we come and sit with you for a little
while? Sir Ronald tells me that you and he are quite old friends."
Her heart gave a leap. Instantly she understood the sardonic amusement
of the stranger's demeanour. If any other man than Sarle had been
there she would have thrown up the sponge. But she could not bear to
have the truth stripped and exposed there before him. It was too
brutal. If he must know, he should know in a less cruel manner than
that. She faced the new-comer squarely, her features frozen to an
outward composure.
"This is a very pleasant surprise, Lady Di!" he said easily, while his
eyes expressed the utmost amusement. "It must be nearly two years
since we met?"
"Oh, surely much longer than that?" she answered, and her smile was
almost as mocking as his. They stood taking each other's measure
whilst Sarle dragged forward some chairs. A faint admiration came into
the man's face. She was a fraud, and he knew that she knew that he
knew it, but he had also to acknowledge that there was fine metal in
her even for an adventuress. As a duellist at least she seemed worthy
of his steel. Besides, in her gown of faint lilac and her orchid-laden
hat she was a very entrancing vision. The duel might be picturesque as
well as piquant.
"I trust you left Lord Vernilands well?" he inquired politely. She dug
desperately in her mind for a moment. It seemed foolishly important to
be truthful, even though this man knew she was acting a lie.
"He is never very well in the winter," she answered, without any
apparent interlude for thought. Sir Ronald was even more pleased with
her.
"That is so," he agreed. "I remember when I left Bethwick that autumn
he was just in for his annual bout of bronchitis."
The two men sat down, and, with her permission, smoked. Sarle had
placed his chair where he could look full at her, missing no shade of
expression on her face. His frank warm eyes enfolded her in a gaze of
trust and devotion that was as patent to the other man as to her.
There was no peace for her in that gaze; things were too desperate for
that; but it nerved her resolution to fence to the death with this
polished gamester. She had her back to the wall, and resolved to die
fighting rather than make an ignominious surrender before the man she
loved.
Sarle looked from one to the other contentedly. For once his
far-seeing veld eyes played him false.
"I am so glad you two are friends," he said. Then, addressing April,
"Odd that we shouldn't have discovered it before, for, you know, Kenna
is my best friend, as well as my ranching partner."