CHAPTER XXX. Contains a Letter to Virginia

Having repaired one day to his accustomed dinner at the White Horse

ordinary, Mr. Warrington was pleased to see amongst the faces round the

table the jolly, good-looking countenance of Parson Sampson, who was

regaling the company when Harry entered, with stories and bons-mots,

which kept them in roars of laughter. Though he had not been in London

for some months, the parson had the latest London news, or what passed

for such with the folks at the ordinary: what was doing in the King's

house at Kensington; and what in the Duke's in Pall Mall: how Mr. Byng

was behaving in prison, and who came to him: what were the odds at

Newmarket, and who was the last reigning toast in Covent Garden;--the

jolly chaplain could give the company news upon all these points,--news

that might not be very accurate indeed, but was as good as if it

were for the country gentlemen who heard it. For suppose that my Lord

Viscount Squanderfield was ruining himself for Mrs. Polly, and Sampson

called her Mrs. Lucy? that it was Lady Jane who was in love with

the actor, and not Lady Mary? that it was Harry Hilton, of the Horse

Grenadiers, who had the quarrel with Chevalier Solingen, at Marybone

Garden, and not Tommy Ruffler, of the Foot Guards? The names and dates

did not matter much. Provided the stories were lively and wicked, their

correctness was of no great importance; and Mr. Sampson laughed and

chattered away amongst his country gentlemen, charmed them with his

spirits and talk, and drank his share of one bottle after another, for

which his delighted auditory persisted in calling. A hundred years ago,

the Abbe Parson, the clergyman who frequented the theatre, the tavern,

the racecourse, the world of fashion, was no uncommon character

in English society: his voice might be heard the loudest in the

hunting-field; he could sing the jolliest song at the Rose or the

Bedford Head, after the play was over at Covent Garden, and could call a

main as well as any at the gaming-table.

It may have been modesty, or it may have been claret, which caused his

reverence's rosy face to redden deeper, but when he saw Mr. Warrington

enter, he whispered “Maxima debetur” to the laughing country squire who

sat next him in his drab coat and gold-laced red waistcoat, and rose up

from his chair and ran, nay, stumbled forward, in his haste to greet the

Virginian: “My dear sir, my very dear sir, my conqueror of spades, and

clubs, and hearts, too, I am delighted to see your honour looking so

fresh and well,” cries the chaplain.

Harry returned the clergyman's greeting with great pleasure: he was glad

to see Mr. Sampson; he could also justly compliment his reverence upon

his cheerful looks and rosy gills.

The squire in the drab coat knew Mr. Warrington; he made a place beside

himself; he called out to the parson to return to his seat on the other

side, and to continue his story about Lord Ogle and the grocer's wife

in------. Where he did not say, for his sentence was interrupted by a

shout and an oath addressed to the parson for treading on his gouty toe.

The chaplain asked pardon, hurriedly turned round to Mr. Warrington,

and informed him, and the rest of the company indeed, that my Lord

Castlewood sent his affectionate remembrances to his cousin, and had

given special orders to him (Mr. Sampson) to come to Tunbridge Wells and

look after the young gentleman's morals; that my Lady Viscountess and my

Lady Fanny were gone to Harrogate for the waters; that Mr. Will had won

his money at Newmarket, and was going on a visit to my Lord Duke;

that Molly the housemaid was crying her eyes out about Gumbo, Mr.

Warrington's valet;--in fine, all the news of Castlewood and its

neighbourhood. Mr. Warrington was beloved by all the country round,

Mr. Sampson told the company, managing to introduce the names of some

persons of the very highest rank into his discourse. “All Hampshire had

heard of his successes at Tunbridge, successes of every kind,” says

Mr. Sampson, looking particularly arch; my lord hoped, their ladyships

hoped, Harry would not be spoilt for his quiet Hampshire home.

The guests dropped off one by one, leaving the young Virginian to his

bottle of wine and the chaplain.

“Though I have had plenty,” says the jolly chaplain, “that is no reason

why I should not have plenty more,” and he drank toast after toast, and

bumper after bumper, to the amusement of Harry, who always enjoyed his

society.

By the time when Sampson had had his “plenty more,” Harry, too, was

become specially generous, warm-hearted, and friendly. A lodging--why

should Mr. Sampson go to the expense of an inn, when there was a room

at Harry's quarters? The chaplain's trunk was ordered thither, Gumbo was

bidden to make Mr. Sampson comfortable--most comfortable; nothing would

satisfy Mr. Warrington but that Sampson should go down to his stables

and see his horses; he had several horses now; and when at the stable

Sampson recognised his own horse which Harry had won from him; and the

fond beast whinnied with pleasure, and rubbed his nose against his old

master's coat; Harry rapped out a brisk energetic expression or two, and

vowed by Jupiter that Sampson should have his old horse back again:

he would give him to Sampson, that he would; a gift which the chaplain

accepted by seizing Harry's hand, and blessing him,--by flinging his

arms round the horse's neck, and weeping for joy there, weeping tears

of Bordeaux and gratitude. Arm-in-arm the friends walked to Madame

Bernstein's from the stable, of which they brought the odours into her

ladyship's apartment. Their flushed cheeks and brightened eyes showed

what their amusement had been. Many gentlemen's cheeks were in the habit

of flushing in those days, and from the same cause.

Madame Bernstein received her nephew's chaplain kindly enough. The old

lady relished Sampson's broad jokes and rattling talk from time to time,

as she liked a highly-spiced dish or a new entree composed by her cook,

upon its two or three first appearances. The only amusement of which she

did not grow tired, she owned, was cards. “The cards don't cheat,” she

used to say. “A bad hand tells you the truth to your face: and there is

nothing so flattering in the world as a good suite of trumps.” And when

she was in a good humour, and sitting down to her favourite pastime, she

would laughingly bid her nephew's chaplain say grace before the meal.

Honest Sampson did not at first care to take a hand at Tunbridge Wells.

Her ladyship's play was too high for him, he would own, slapping his

pocket with a comical piteous look, and its contents had already been

handed over to the fortunate youth at Castlewood. Like most persons of

her age, and indeed her sex, Madame Bernstein was not prodigal of money.

I suppose it must have been from Harry Warrington, whose heart was

overflowing with generosity as his purse with guineas, that the chaplain

procured a small stock of ready coin, with which he was presently

enabled to appear at the card-table.

Our young gentleman welcomed Mr. Sampson to his coin, as to all the rest

of the good things which he had gathered about him. 'Twas surprising how

quickly the young Virginian adapted himself to the habits of life of

the folks amongst whom he lived. His suits were still black, but of the

finest cut and quality. “With a star and ribbon, and his stocking down,

and his hair over his shoulder, he would make a pretty Hamlet,” said the

gay old Duchess Queensberry. “And I make no doubt he has been the death

of a dozen Ophelias already, here and amongst the Indians,” she added,

thinking not at all the worse of Harry for his supposed successes among

the fair. Harry's lace and linen were as fine as his aunt could desire.

He purchased fine shaving-plate of the toy-shop women, and a couple of

magnificent brocade bedgowns, in which his worship lolled at ease, and

sipped his chocolate of a morning. He had swords and walking-canes, and

French watches with painted backs and diamond settings, and snuff boxes

enamelled by artists of the same cunning nation. He had a levee of

grooms, jockeys, tradesmen, daily waiting in his anteroom, and admitted

one by one to him and Parson Sampson, over his chocolate, by Gumbo, the

groom of the chambers. We have no account of the number of men whom Mr.

Gumbo now had under him. Certain it is that no single negro could have

taken care of all the fine things which Mr. Warrington now possessed,

let alone the horses and the postchaise which his honour had bought.

Also Harry instructed himself in the arts which became a gentleman in

those days. A French fencing-master, and a dancing-master of the same

nation, resided at Tunbridge during that season when Harry made

his appearance: these men of science the young Virginian sedulously

frequented, and acquired considerable skill and grace in the peaceful

and warlike accomplishments which they taught. Ere many weeks were over

he could handle the foils against his master or any frequenter of the

fencing-school,--and, with a sigh, Lady Maria (who danced very elegantly

herself) owned that there was no gentleman at court who could walk a

minuet more gracefully than Mr. Warrington. As for riding, though Mr.

Warrington took a few lessons on the great horse from a riding-master

who came to Tunbridge, he declared that their own Virginian manner was

well enough for him, and that he saw no one amongst the fine folks

and the jockeys who could ride better than his friend Colonel George

Washington of Mount Vernon.

The obsequious Sampson found himself in better quarters than he had

enjoyed for ever so long a time. He knew a great deal of the world, and

told a great deal more, and Harry was delighted with his stories, real

or fancied. The man of twenty looks up to the man of thirty, admires

the latter's old jokes, stale puns, and tarnished anecdotes, that are

slopped with the wine of a hundred dinner-tables. Sampson's town and

college pleasantries were all new and charming to the young Virginian. A

hundred years ago,--no doubt there are no such people left in the world

now,--there used to be grown men in London who loved to consort with

fashionable youths entering life; to tickle their young fancies with

merry stories; to act as Covent Garden Mentors and masters of ceremonies

at the Round-house; to accompany lads to the gaming-table, and perhaps

have an understanding with the punters; to drink lemonade to Master

Hopeful's Burgundy, and to stagger into the streets with perfectly

cool heads when my young lord reeled out to beat the watch. Of this, no

doubt, extinct race, Mr. Sampson was a specimen: and a great comfort it

is to think (to those who choose to believe the statement) that in Queen

Victoria's reign there are no flatterers left, such as existed in the

reign of her royal great-grandfather, no parasites pandering to the

follies of young men; in fact, that all the toads have been eaten off

the face of the island (except one or two that are found in stones,

where they have lain perdus these hundred years), and the toad-eaters

have perished for lack of nourishment.

With some sauces, as I read, the above-mentioned animals are said to

be exceedingly fragrant, wholesome, and savoury eating. Indeed, no man

could look more rosy and healthy, or flourish more cheerfully, than

friend Sampson upon the diet. He became our young friend's confidential

leader, and, from the following letter, which is preserved in the

Warrington correspondence, it will be seen that Mr. Harry not only

had dancing and fencing masters, but likewise a tutor, chaplain, and

secretary:--

TO MRS. ESMOND WARRINGTON OF CASTLEWOOD AT HER HOUSE AT RICHMOND,

VIRGINIA

Mrs. Bligh's Lodgings, Pantiles, Tunbridge Wells,

“August 25th, 1756.

“HONOURED MADAM--Your honoured letter of 20 June, per Mr. Trail of

Bristol, has been forwarded to me duly, and I have to thank your

goodness and kindness for the good advice which you are pleased to give

me, as also for the remembrances of dear home, which I shall love never

the worse for having been to the home of our ancestors in England.

“I writ you a letter by the last monthly packet, informing my honoured

mother of the little accident I had on the road hither, and of the

kind friends who I found and whom took me in. Since then I have been

profiting of the fine weather and the good company here, and have made

many friends among our nobility, whose acquaintance I am sure you will

not be sorry that I should make. Among their lordships I may mention the

famous Earl of Chesterfield, late Ambassador to Holland, and Viceroy of

the Kingdom of Ireland; the Earl of March and Ruglen, who will be Duke

of Queensberry at the death of his Grace; and her Grace the Duchess, a

celebrated beauty of the Queen's time, when she remembers my grandpapa

at Court. These and many more persons of the first fashion attend my

aunt's assemblies, which are the most crowded at this crowded place.

Also on my way hither I stayed at Westerham, at the house of an officer,

Lieut.-Gen. Wolfe, who served with my grandfather and General Webb

in the famous wars of the Duke of Marlborough. Mr. Wolfe has a son,

Lieut.-Col. James Wolfe, engaged to be married to a beautiful lady now

in this place, Miss Lowther of the North--and though but 30 years old he

is looked up to as much as any officer in the whole army, and has served

with honour under his Royal Highness the Duke wherever our arms have

been employed.

“I thank my honoured mother for announcing to me that a quarter's

allowance of 52l. 10s. will be paid me by Mr. Trail. I am in no present

want of cash, and by practising a rigid economy, which will be necessary

(as I do not disguise) for the maintenance of horses, Gumbo, and the

equipage and apparel requisite for a young gentleman of good family,

hope to be able to maintain my credit without unduly trespassing upon

yours. The linnen and clothes which I brought with me will with due care

last for some years--as you say. 'Tis not quite so fine as worn here by

persons of fashion, and I may have to purchase a few very fine shirts

for great days: but those I have are excellent for daily wear.

“I am thankful that I have been quite without occasion to use your

excellent family pills. Gumbo hath taken them with great benefit, who

grows fat and saucy upon English beef, ale, and air. He sends his humble

duty to his mistress, and prays Mrs. Mountain to remember him to all

his fellow-servants, especially Dinah and Lily, for whom he has bought

posey-rings at Tunbridge Fair.

“Besides partaking of all the pleasures of the place, I hope my honoured

mother will believe that I have not been unmindful of my education.

I have had masters in fencing and dancing, and my Lord Castlewood's

chaplain, the Reverend Mr. Sampson, having come hither to drink the

waters, has been so good as to take a vacant room at my lodging. Mr. S.

breakfasts with me, and we read together of a morning--he saying that I

am not quite such a dunce as I used to appear at home. We have read

in Mr. Rapin's History, Dr. Barrow's Sermons, and, for amusement,

Shakspeare, Mr. Pope's Homer, and (in French) the translation of an

Arabian Work of Tales, very diverting. Several men of learning have been

staying here besides the persons of fashion; and amongst the former was

Mr. Richardson, the author of the famous books which you and Mountain

and my dearest brother used to love so. He was pleased when I told him

that his works were in your closet in Virginia, and begged me to convey

his respectful compliments to my lady-mother. Mr. R. is a short fat man,

with little of the fire of genius visible in his eye or person.

“My aunt and my cousin, the Lady Maria, desire their affectionate

compliments to you, and with best regards for Mountain, to whom I

enclose a note, I am,--Honoured madam, your dutiful son, H. ESMOND

WARRINGTON.”

Note in Madam Esmond's Handwriting,

“From my son. Received October 15 at Richmond. Sent 16 jars preserved

peaches, 224 lbs. best tobacco, 24 finest hams, per Royal William of

Liverpool, 8 jars peaches, 12 hams for my nephew, the Rt. Honourable

the Earl of Castlewood. 4 jars, 6 hams for the Baroness Bernstein, ditto

ditto for Mrs. Lambert of Oakhurst, Surrey, and 1/2 cwt. tobacco.

Packet of Infallible Family Pills for Gumbo. My Papa's large silver-gilt

shoe-buckles for H., and red silver-laced saddle-cloth.”

II. (enclosed in No. I.)

“For Mrs. Mountain.

“What do you mien, you silly old Mountain, by sending an order for your

poor old divadends dew at Xmas? I'd have you to know I don't want your

7l. 10, and have toar your order up into 1000 bitts. I've plenty of

money. But I'm obleaged to you all same. A kiss to Fanny from--Your

loving HARRY.”

Note in Madam Esmond's Handwriting

“This note, which I desired M. to show to me, proves that she hath a

good heart, and that she wished to show her gratitude to the family, by

giving up her half-yearly divd. (on L500 3 per ct.) to my boy. Hence

I reprimanded her very slightly for daring to send money to Mr. E.

Warrington, unknown to his mother. Note to Mountain not so well spelt as

letter to me.

“Mem. to write to Revd. Mr. Sampson desire to know what theolog. books

he reads with H. Recommend Law, Baxter, Drelincourt.--Request H. to say

his catechism to Mr. S., which he has never quite been able to master.

By next ship peaches (3), tobacco 1/2 cwt. Hams for Mr. S.”

The mother of the Virginians and her sons have long long since passed

away. So how are we to account for the fact, that of a couple of letters

sent under one enclosure and by one packet, one should be well spelt,

and the other not entirely orthographical? Had Harry found some

wonderful instructor, such as exists in the present lucky times, and

who would improve his writing in six lessons? My view of the case, after

deliberately examining the two notes, is this: No. 1, in which there

appears a trifling grammatical slip (“the kind, friends who I found and

whom took me in”), must have been re-written from a rough copy which

had probably undergone the supervision of a tutor or friend. The more

artless composition, No. 2, was not referred to the scholar who prepared

No. 1 for the maternal eye, and to whose corrections of “who” and “whom”

Mr. Warrington did not pay very close attention. Who knows how he

may have been disturbed? A pretty milliner may have attracted Harry's

attention out of window--a dancing bear with pipe and tabor may have

passed along the common--a jockey come under his windows to show off a

horse there? There are some days when any of us may be ungrammatical and

spell ill. Finally, suppose Harry did not care to spell so elegantly for

Mrs. Mountain as for his lady-mother, what affair is that of the

present biographer, century, reader? And as for your objection that Mr.

Warrington, in the above communication to his mother, showed some little

hypocrisy and reticence in his dealings with that venerable person, I

dare say, young folks, you in your time have written more than one prim

letter to your papas and mammas in which not quite all the transactions

of your lives were narrated, or if narrated, were exhibited in the most

favourable light for yourselves--I dare say, old folks! you, in your

time, were not altogether more candid. There must be a certain distance

between me and my son Jacky. There must be a respectful, an amiable, a

virtuous hypocrisy between us. I do not in the least wish that he should

treat me as his equal, that he should contradict me, take my arm-chair,

read the newspaper first at breakfast, ask unlimited friends to dine

when I have a party of my own, and so forth. No; where there is not

equality there must be hypocrisy. Continue to be blind to my faults; to

hush still as mice when I fall asleep after dinner; to laugh at my old

jokes; to admire my sayings; to be astonished at the impudence of those

unbelieving reviewers; to be dear filial humbugs, O my children! In my

castle I am king. Let all my royal household back before me. 'Tis not

their natural way of walking, I know: but a decorous, becoming, and

modest behaviour highly agreeable to me. Away from me they may do, nay,

they do do, what they like. They may jump, skip, dance, trot, tumble

over heads and heels, and kick about freely, when they are out of the

presence of my majesty. Do not then, my dear young friends, be surprised

at your mother and aunt when they cry out, “Oh, it was highly immoral

and improper of Mr. Warrington to be writing home humdrum demure letters

to his dear mamma, when he was playing all sorts of merry pranks!”--but

drop a curtsey, and say, “Yes, dear grandmamma (or aunt, as may be),

it was very wrong of him: and I suppose you never had your fun when you

were young.” Of course, she didn't! And the sun never shone, and the

blossoms never budded, and the blood never danced, and the fiddles never

sang, in her spring-time. Eh, Babet! mon lait de poule et mon bonnet

de nuit! Ho, Betty! my gruel and my slippers! And go, ye frisky, merry

little souls! and dance, and have your merry little supper of cakes and

ale!

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