In a trench over in Flanders, during a slight lull in the engagement, a
soldier was making an impromptu toilet. He lowered his head for an
instant and thereby caught a cootie. As he did so, a shell fragment flew
by, just where his head had been. He held the cootie in hand
meditatively for a moment, and then said:
"Old fellow, Oi cawnt give you the Victoria Cross, but I can put you
back!"