VI

_Dear Kate_:

Say, but I am a happy girl! What do you think, Billy and me is in the

country. I am going to stay a week, and Billy is going to stay always, I

hope. After I had made that first visit to Mrs. Smith, I kept seeing

that place with the pigs and the chickens and the trees and the lake and

the nice green grass and the kids rolling over on it, and the room here

got smaller and hotter, and Billy got whiter, and I felt I couldn't

stand it, so I sat down and wrote Mrs. Smith, and asked her if she

wouldn't take Billy to board. She was real nice and came over to see me

one day, and ended up by taking me and Billy back with her. She asked me

to stay a week so Billy would get used to her and the place and not be

lonesome. The manager kicked, but I said I was sick, and I got a week's

leave. Mrs. Smith offered to take Billy for nothing, but I wouldn't

stand for that and we settled on $3.50 for his board. I offered to pay

more, but she would not listen to me. She says he will be company for

her baby, and that two is easier to take care of than one anyway.

This life here don't seem real to me. I went to bed at nine o'clock,

which I don't remember I have ever done in my life before. Even as a kid

I was on the streets until ten or eleven o'clock and, in the last three

years, three in the morning has been my bye-bye time. I went up to a

little room under the roof, and lay awake until almost morning, hearing

such a lot of strange sounds that I was as nervous as a hen. There was a

big tree by the corner of the house, and its branches would swish across

the roof as if a ghost was trying to get in the window. Talk about the

quiet of a country night, I never heard so many sounds in all my life

and they all seemed sad. The little frogs go chug, chug, as if their

hearts was broken, and every once in a while, the tinkle of the cow-bell

from some pasture down below, would come to me. There is a night bird

called the whip-o-will that set in a tree up near the barn and called

another one across the lake whose answer I could just hear. There is a

funny animal up here called the bull-frog, who sets upon a log over at

the back of the lake and hollars at his friends. The first time I heard

them, it nearly scared a lung from me, but now I lie in bed and laugh

when they commence. I thought the Smiths were joshing me when they

showed me the little thing that made such a big noise. Wouldn't it be

nice if we could make a noise as big according to our size as the

bull-frog does to his? I know lots of people that I would like to sit on

a log and hollar at.

It seemed I had just shut my eyes when they called me to breakfast, but

it was beautiful. We ate out in front of the kitchen door and saw a gray

mist rise over the lake all turning to rose when the sun touched it. It

looked like a pink silk dancing petticoat under a gray chiffon skirt.

Did you ever eat at a table under a great big tree looking out on the

water? You know you eat different. You eat slow, and you think of the

things you love, the things you have read about, and of what you would

like to be. The toast seems crisper, and the coffee tastes better, and

you forget the rotten crowd and old New York and the hot, dry streets

and the Childs restaurants and the dance halls and the whole bum world.

Then our evenings are so happy! We row around the lake and afterwards

come home and water the flowers. We must pump the water from the pump in

the kitchen and carry it in pails. I had one side of the lawn and Mrs.

Smith had the other side, and last night my flowers took fifteen pails.

It makes my back ache, and the pump coughs as if it had the T. B., but

the flowers are so pretty, and they look so happy and so old fashioned

in the big green tubs, that I am willing to do anything for them. Mrs.

Smith has learnt me their names. There are pansies with purple and

yellow faces, and proud red dahlias, and China astors and hollyhocks

against the wall, and flox all mixed together in a way that shows, as

Mrs. Smith says, that there is no social standing in the country. There

are some poor tea roses that by mistake got planted in a bed of

merrigolds, and they are not doing very well and act unhappy. Each

morning I go over them all and take away the foolish green worms that

always crawl back in the night, although I throw them over the fence.

Then, when all the "chores," as Mr. Smith calls them are done, we shut

the boat-house door and set on the veranda and watch the moon as it goes

down over the tree tops. It shines so beautiful through the pine trees

at the edge of the lake. Everyone is quiet. Even the babies snuggle down

in our arms and stop their chattering. There are two great toads that

live under the front veranda, who come out on the walk and look at each

other as only toads in love can look, and there is a cricket in the

tree down by the lake that calls to a lady cricket who lives over by the

ice house. She answered lovingly for two evenings, but I guess now she

is gone, and he sets in his lonely tree, and calls and calls, and no

soft-voiced cricket says, "Yes, dear." There is a loud-voiced cricket

that sets near the boat-house door, and says, "Come to me, come to me,"

and I fear my lady cricket has gone to him.

Then we take our little lamps and go to bed, and I have the baby near me

if I want to speak to him. I use to have to read till I couldn't keep my

eyes open any longer, but now sleep seems to come to me just like a

friend. Some way I feel that this is the right life, and if I only could

live it long enough, I might become a woman after all.

_Nan_.

Living Up to Billy · 第 7 / 43 题