And if at the last moment before the reporters goes home for the night
word comes that the Germans made another strong attack on Hill
Six-sixty-six B, y'understand, they strike out everything except 'World
Wants Work Wonders' and let it go at that."
"Referendum and Recall is something else which you used to see a whole
lot about in the papers," Abe said, "and while I always ducked 'em
myself, at the same time there must be a whole lot of people which is
wondering what ever become of 'em since the war started."
"The chances is," Morris declared, "if they was to come across the names
Referendum and Recall in the papers to-day, Abe, they would say it's a
miracle they escaped as long as they did, because they've got a hazy
impression they read it somewheres that the Recollection, the
Resurrection, and the Reproduction of the same line was sunk by U-boats
about the time they torpedoed the Minnieboska, the Minnietoba, and all
them other Minnies."
"Prize-fighting is also got a black eye in the way of newspaper
publicity since we went into the war, Mawruss," Abe continued, "and it
ain't remarkable, neither, when you look back and think of the pages and
pages the newspapers used to print about a couple of loafers trying to
hurt each other with gloves on their hands, which, believe me, Mawruss,
a green shipping-clerk could give himself worse _Makkas_ nailing up one
case of goods than them boys could do to each other in a whole season
already."
"I bet yer," Morris said, "and for such a picnic Jeff Willard used to
get over a hundred thousand dollars yet."
"Can you imagine how much money one of them aviators over in the old
country ought to draw under such a wage scale?" Abe asked. "I read an
account of what an aviator has got to do when he goes up in an
airyoplane, Mawruss, and at one and the same time while he is balancing
himself five thousand feet in the air he takes photographs, shoots off
guns, drops bombs, sends wireless telegraphs, and also runs and steers
an engine which is so powerful, y'understand, that if you would be
running it on dry land, Mawruss, you wouldn't be able to take your mind
off of it long enough to think about the high cost of camera supplies,
let alone taking pictures yet."
"I wonder if such a young feller has got also a knowledge of bookkeeping
and stenography," Morris speculated.
"What difference does that make?" Abe asked.
"Because, Abe, if after the war we could get him to come to work in our
place it would pay us to give him a hundred dollars a week even," Morris
replied, "on account it would be a cinch, after what he's been used to
in his last position, for such a young feller to operate an electric
rotary cutting-machine with his left hand and press garments with his
right, and he has still got both legs and his head left to keep the
books, answer the telephone, run a typewriter and an adding-machine,
and fix up a new card index for our credit system."
"At that he would probably throw up the job on account he didn't have
enough to do to keep him busy, Mawruss," Abe commented, "and also it's
going to be pretty hard for them fellers to settle down after the war
gets through, considering all the excitement they've had with their
names in the papers and everything."
"Say!" Morris exclaimed. "The fact that a feller like Hindenberg is now
getting his name in the paper the way it used to was a few years ago
with Hannah Elias and Cassie Chadwick ain't no criterion to judge by,
Abe, because what war done to make the newspapers forget their old
friends Bryan and Evelyn Nesbut ain't a marker on what peace is going to
do to a great many of these here front-page propositions which is
nowadays accustomed to being continued on page two, column five,
y'understand. Why, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if in about five or six
years from now, Abe, you are going to take up the paper some morning and
read an item like this: