"Drink to me only with thine eyes"--
And if you happen to survive a
So curious potion, pray advise
How it affects the conjunctiva!
This problem, which my mind absorbs,
A veritable Gordian knot is:
How can maids swallow with their orbs?
Where's the protecting epiglottis?
"I sent thee late a rosy wreath"--
For Science' sake, my Angelina,
And hope you noticed underneath
Those buds of _rosa damascena._
No high-flown zeal my soul uplifts,
And as for ardour, I've not got any;--
I simply send you floral gifts
To help you forward with your botany!
* * * * *
THE FLIRT'S PARADISE.--Coquet Island.
* * * * *
[Illustration: SO SWEET OF HER!
_Lady_ (_recently married, in answer to congratulations of visiting lady
friend_). "Thank you, dear. But I still find it very hard to remember my
new name."
_Friend._ "Ah, dear, but of course you had the old one so long!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: "Oh, George dear, the landlord has raised the rent!"
"Has he? _I_ can't!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: EVIDENCE OF AN EYE-WITNESS
_Guest._ "Why do you believe in second sight, Major?"
_Major Darby_ (_in an impressive whisper_). "Because _I_ fell in love at
_first_ sight!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: FULL MOON]
[Illustration: FIRST QUARTER]
[Illustration: THIRD QUARTER]
[Illustration: NO MOON]
* * * * *
THE BRUTE CREATION.--Husbands who beat their wives.
* * * * *
THE HEIGHT OF MODESTY.--The most bashful girl we ever knew was one who
blushed when she was asked if she had not been courting sleep.
* * * * *
[Illustration: "_Are_ you comin' 'ome?"
"I'll do ellythik you _like_ in reasol, M'ria--(_hic_)--bur I _won't_
come 'ome."]
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Harold._ "And now, darling, tell me what your father
said when you told him we were engaged."
_Sybil._ "Oh, Harold, don't ask me to repeat his language!"]
* * * * *