[Illustration: His Hunting Costume is rather startling.]
[Illustration: His Method of Amusing himself in Covert was unusual.]
[Illustration: His style of Riding was a trifle reckless.]
[Illustration: And when he compelled some Bullocks to join in the chase,
it was hardly the thing.]
[Illustration: But all this wouldn't have mattered so much, if he hadn't
galloped through the Hounds--]
[Illustration: And murdered the Fox with his infernal Whip!]
* * * * *
"LE KICKE-BALL" IN FRANCE.
(_A Vindication._)
MON CHER MONSIEUR PUNCH,--That you have been the victim of "a 'oax,"
crafty, ingenious, and abominable, there is now no shadow of a doubt.
That letter palmed off on to your good and trustful nature the week
before last, with the signature of "LE HEADS MASTERRE," professing to
deal with the subject of the International athleticism, I should
unfailingly pronounce, after cursory investigation, to be a forgery,
impudent and profound. For survey the facts: while it proposed, in a set
of regulations _bizarre_ and fantastic, to abolish "Le 'Arf-back," as a
superfluous officer in the French game, a contest took place in the very
centre of this Paris, in which not only the "'Arf-back," but the
"Three-quarterre-back" was referred to as having been _changed four
times in the progress of one game_! Nor was this all. So highly and
efficiently trained by the indefatigable Principal had been the French
"'Ome-team," that,--glorious announcement to make,--they succeeded in
carrying off the victory, not merely from one of your Public School
Clubs, representing only one country, but from a united "_Onze_," that
might have been regarded with a natural and excusable patriotic pride,
as the combined force of all the whole civilised world. Yes, the force
opposed to our courageous youths of the _Lycée Janson de Sailly_
comprised not only Englishmen, but other nationalities, including sons
of the American United States and Holland. Against this formidable
combination the active and sportsmanlike youth of our re-awakened
athletic France scored a victory, easy, swift, and complete, of two
tries to nothing.
For further particulars, I refer you to the newspapers of the period,
that furnish the details of the affair. In them you will see that, so
far from "_Le Scrimmage_" being abandoned, on the contrary, several, of
a character hotly contested, and severe, appear to have arisen in the
efforts necessary to secure _les deux "tries"_; for though no mention is
made of the Hospital ambulance, yet it is hinted that much
sticking-plasterre must have been used in fastening up and healing the
many contusions, grave, startling, and various, resulting from the
furious kicking of legs, and struggling of bodies, inevitable in the
progress of "_Un Scrimmage_" in which _Three-quarters-back_,
_'Arf-backs_, _Forwards_, and _even Goal-keeperes_ were often mingled in
confusion, bewildering and prolonged, and only saved from being deadly
and prostrating by the admirable _élan_ and courageous spirit with which
it was encountered.
No, _mon cher Monsieur Punch_, I do not say that when our Athletic
Committee commence their investigations of the dangers obvious and
definite connected with the conduct of your _jeu de Cricquette_, that
they may not alter the constitution and weight of the ball, which I
understand is made of lead, and weighs ten pounds and three-quarters,
and reduce the size of _les batte-clubs_, themselves instruments to an
excessive degree ponderous and grotesque, probably eliminating entirely
from the field such dangerously-located officers as "Le Long-stoppe,"
"Le square-legge," and, above all, "Le wicket-keepere," but this does
not affect their action in considering the reformation of the rules for
the legitimate and reasonable conduct of the game of "Kicke-ball." No,
_mon cher Monsieur_, these they are agreeable to leave as they are,
remembering that the ball, formidable though he may be on account of his
size, is harmless as a butterfly in the contact, being filled only with
air. Moreover they see no reason to change when an "_Onze_" of this New
Athletic France can, with the old rules, claim as she does the noble
victory of _le deux_ "tries" to nothing, and enables the writer of this
letter of correction, with a satisfaction that is keen and infinite, and
a pride that is profound and pardonable, to subscribe himself hereunder,