BAG AND BAGGAGE
The Court Godmother returned to the Throne-room. She had not attached
much importance to what Daphne had told her, but, even if she had, she
would have belittled it in her extreme desire to avoid any action that
might entail inconvenience to herself.
In the Throne-room, Count Rubenfresser had just been announced.
"Yes, Duchess," said Queen Selina, in answer to an astonished inquiry.
"That is dear Edna's fiancé. A fine young man, is he not?"
"Heavens! I should think he _was_! I should call him a giant myself,"
replied the Duchess bluntly.
"I _told_ you he was _rather_ tall. I think he's grown since his
engagement. How do you do, my dear Ruprecht? Come and be introduced to
my old friend the Duchess of Gleneagles, who is _so_ very anxious to
make your acquaintance."
"I don't much care about knowing old women," said the Count, who had no
great love for his future mother-in-law, and had become much less
deferential of late.
"But this one's a _Duchess_, Ruprecht!" whispered the agonised Queen.
"Edna, my love, perhaps _you_ had better----" and eventually he
submitted with a slight scowl to be led up and presented by his fiancée.
"I hear I am to congratulate you--er--Count Fresser," said the Duchess.
"You are certainly a fortunate man to have won a Princess."
"Not more fortunate than she," he replied. "She wanted a Superman, as
she calls it. I am doing all I can to become one."
"If she isn't satisfied with you as you are, she must be hard to
please."
"_She_ is satisfied enough," he said. "Now it is for her to _please_ me.
She knows that by this time--don't you, Edna?"
"Yes, Ruprecht dear, yes," said Edna, hastily. "Of course I do. This is
how he's taken to bullying me, Duchess," she added lightly. "Don't you
think it's too bad of him?"
"It seems a little early to begin. You shouldn't allow it."
"Oh, but I _like_ him to!" said Edna, pressing the Count's great arm.
"In that case, my dear," said the Duchess, "you have every prospect of a
happy future!"
A blast from the silver trumpets here proclaimed that luncheon was
served.
"Lunch, at last, eh?" said King Sidney, bustling up to the Duchess.
"Permit me to offer your Grace my arm. Clarence, my boy, you take in her
ladyship here. Selina, my love, if you will lead the way with the
Marshal."
The Count followed with Edna, and the Fairy Vogelflug arrived in time to
bring up the rear with Princess Ruby.
"It's a most extraordinary thing," said the King, after they had sat
down to lunch in the hall with the malachite columns, "a most
extraordinary thing, that, when we have company like this, there should
be no more than six pages to wait on us! We generally have at least a
dozen. What's become of all the rest of you?" he asked a page.
"I cannot say, sire," answered the boy. "They were waiting in the
courtyard to receive His Excellency the Count, but have not yet
returned."
King Sidney told the Court Chamberlain to send for them at once, but the
messenger returned with the information that the missing pages were
nowhere to be seen.
"Must have run off before I arrived," said the Count, laughing
boisterously. "Played truant, the young rascals!"
The Fairy, however, recollected Daphne's story of the sack, and was
seized with suspicion. Was it possible that the royal pages--? If so,
she felt something ought to be done--though not by her. She was too
cautious an old person to take unnecessary risks, and decided to employ
a deputy.
"Ruby, my child," she whispered to the little Princess, who was sitting
next to her, "I believe the Count has brought a present for you. It's in
a sack in his coach. Ask him what it is."
"I don't want to know," objected Ruby, "I wouldn't take any present from
_him_--except Tützi, perhaps."
"I may be wrong," said the Court Godmother, "perhaps it isn't for you
after all. But I'm sure it would make him very uncomfortable if you
asked him, before everybody, what he happens to have in that sack of
his."
"If I was sure of that," said Ruby, "I'd ask him like a shot!"
"You may depend on it. And more than that, Lady Daphne is particularly
anxious to know."
"Oh, if _Miss Heritage_ wants me to, all right!" said Ruby. "I say,
Count Rubenfresser," she called across the table, "I want to ask you
something."
"If it's a riddle, little Princess," replied the Count, with his mouth
full, "I give it up beforehand."
"It isn't a riddle. It's this: What have you got inside that sack?"
"Sack?" said the Count blankly. "I don't understand. I have no sack
here."
"I don't mean here. I mean the sack that's inside your coach."
"Ruby, my dear," interposed her mother, "you mustn't be so inquisitive.
It's very rude."
"I know he has got a sack there, Mummy," insisted Ruby, "and I do want
to know what he's got in it."
"Hear me rag my precious brother-in-law," said Clarence aside to Lady
Muscombe. "A sack, eh?" he said aloud. "What do you bring a sack out to
lunch for--scraps?"
"For shame, Clarence!" cried Edna.
"It's not a sack, as it happens," said the Count sulkily. "It's a long
bag--and what I use it for is entirely my own business."
"I don't know so much about that," retorted Clarence. "With such a lot
of plate in the Palace!"
"Clarence!" cried Edna again. "This is too outrageous of you!"
"Much!" put in Lady Muscombe. "As if the Count couldn't bring his clubs
with him if he's going on to golf somewhere!" she said to Clarence in an
undertone. "And of course he'd want a very long case for them! You
really _must_ behave more decently!"
"I mean having this out with the beggar," he replied. "Count, her
ladyship suggests that you may have golf clubs in that bag of yours. Is
that so?"
"And if I have," said the Count. "Why shouldn't I?"
"Because you don't play golf. No one does here--now, and I'll take my
oath you can't tell a brassey from a putter. You never owned a set of
clubs in your life!"
"Really, my boy!" said King Sidney nervously. "A scene like this! Before
our guests! It won't _do_, you know. Drop it!"
"Yes," said Lady Muscombe, laying her pretty but slightly over-manicured
fingers on Clarence's sleeve. "You're only making everybody
uncomfortable. Talk to me instead!"
"Presently," he said. "If you really have got golf clubs, Count, I
should like to have a look at them after lunch."
"I never said I had got those things," replied the Count, with a
wonderful command over his temper. "And if you want to know what _is_ in
the bag, I don't mind telling you--only a few pumpkins from my own
gardens."
"You mean to say you make such pets of your bally pumpkins that you take
'em out driving with you? That's such a likely story!"
"Clarence," said the Queen, "I will not have poor Ruprecht badgered like
this. If he chooses to carry pumpkins with him--as we do gold
sometimes--and distribute them to deserving persons, it is so much the
more to his credit."
"He'd get 'em buzzed back at his head pretty soon, if he did!" replied
the impenitent Clarence. "He's not exactly the object of general
adoration in these parts, as he jolly well knows.... Anything upset you,
Marchioness?" he inquired of Lady Muscombe, who was giggling with a
quite un-peeress-like lack of restraint.
"Nothing," she said faintly. "Only the--the pumpkins. You really are
_rather_ a funny Royal Family, you know!"
"I'm sorry to make myself unpleasant, Mater," said Clarence, returning
to the charge. "But I can't swallow those pumpkins. I want the sack
brought in so that we can satisfy ourselves what there _is_ in it." The
Court Chamberlain, in the hope that the contents, whatever they might
be, would at least serve to compromise the Count, instantly despatched
one of the pages to fetch the bag.
"Baron," said the Queen angrily, "it is for Us to give orders--not you!"
"Your Majesty must pardon my presumption," he said, as the pages had
already obeyed him. "I was merely carrying out the wishes of His Royal
Highness the Crown Prince."
"I shall die if this goes on much longer! I _know_ I shall!" gasped Lady
Muscombe.
"Ha!" cried Clarence, as the pages staggered in with a huge distended
sack. "Leave it alone, I'll open it myself."
"Surely not without asking the owner's permission?" said the Duchess,
who had hitherto witnessed the scene in silent and dignified amazement.
"You can open it if you like!" said the Count, with a confident smile.
"And then you will see what a fuss you have made about nothing."
Clarence cut the cord, and opened the sack. The moment he did so his
jaw fell. "I own up," he said. "I was wrong. They _are_ pumpkins!"
"And if you are a gentleman, Clarence," cried Edna, "you will apologise
to Ruprecht at once!"
"There may be something else underneath," he said, lifting a pumpkin
suspiciously in both hands. "Hullo! My hat! What's this I've got hold
of?" he exclaimed, as the vegetable suddenly developed, the moment it
was clear of the sack, into one of the chubbiest of the royal pages.
"Very odd!" he remarked, as he set the boy down. "Let's have the lot
out." He tilted the sack, and as each pumpkin rolled out upon the
sardonyx pavement, a bewildered page sprang up in its stead.
"Quite a clever trick!" said Lady Muscombe. "Even Maskelyne and Devant
couldn't beat that!"
"After all, it wasn't so very much of a change!" was Ruby's comment.
"What do you boys mean by playing at being pumpkins in this way?"
demanded King Sidney. "I must have an explanation of this. Speak out,
one of you!"
"If it please you, sire," said the first page, sinking on one knee,
"When His Excellency the Count arrived he invited us to get inside the
sack, at the bottom of which he told us we should find sweetmeats. And
we crawled in--and I don't remember any more till I fell out just now."
"Just count these boys, Baron, will you?" said the King. "The whole
dozen correct? Good. And now, sir," he added, turning to the Count, "I
should like to hear what _you_ have got to say."
"Allow me, sire," interrupted Marshal Federhelm, as Count Ruprecht
seemed content to smile blandly. "His Excellency no doubt intended to
afford your Majesties a little harmless diversion."
"That was all," said the Count. "This is a magic sack which has the
property of turning anything inside it into whatever its owner wishes. I
thought it might amuse you."
"Liar!" struck in Clarence. "You wouldn't have said a word about it but
for Ruby! You meant to take those pumpkins--I mean _pages_--away with
you. You _know_ you did! I don't know what the Guv'nor and Mater think
of it--but I consider myself it was a confounded liberty!"
"Well, well," said the King, "it was a mistake no doubt. But there's
been no harm done, so perhaps we'd better leave it at that--for the
present, you know, for the present."
But the Court Chamberlain could not allow such an opportunity to escape
him. "Forgive me, sire," he said eagerly, "but your Majesties are
evidently unacquainted with his Excellency's family history. The motive
for his indiscretion will perhaps be better understood when I mention
that his parents' title was formerly Bubenfresser, and that they were
executed by command of the late King as being notorious ogres."
"So _that_ was his game, was it?" cried Clarence. "Bagged our pages,
meaning to gobble 'em up when he got 'em home! Am I to have an Ogre for
a brother-in-law?"
At this there was a general cry of horror.
"Marshal," said the King, "you must have known all about this--and you
gave that fellow an excellent character!"
"I had no reason to believe otherwise, sire," replied the ex-Regent
smoothly. "He had been brought up as a strict vegetarian, and I cannot
think that, if he had not acquired a taste for meat at your Majesty's
table, he would ever have developed these--er--hereditary proclivities."
"He hasn't developed them!" declared Edna. "It's false! Ruprecht, deny
it! Tell them you are no Ogre!"
"Really, ma'am," said the Duchess to Queen Selina, "I must ask your
permission to leave the table. I don't feel as if I ought to be present
at a family dispute of this intimate nature."
"Pray don't go, my dear Duchess!" the Queen implored her. "Not till
you've heard what the Count has to say."
The Count rose and folded his arms in proud defiance. "I'm not an Ogre,"
he said sulkily.
"I knew it--I knew it!" cried Edna. "Appearances were against him,
that's all!"
"Not an Ogre yet," went on the Count. "But I hope to be one as soon as I
get the chance."
"No, no, Ruprecht!" protested Edna. "You don't mean it--you _know_ you
don't!"
"What!" said the Count, scowling at her. "Are you going to turn round on
me like this, after encouraging me as you did?"
"You will not find it easy to persuade me," said the Duchess, "that the
Princess would ever have urged you to become an Ogre."
"_Urged_ him, indeed!" cried Edna wildly. "I had no suspicion--I never
said a single word that could possibly----"
"Didn't you say I was to follow the teachings of your great master with
the name I never can pronounce?" he demanded. "Didn't you tell me to
make my own morality and obey my own instincts, without caring what
people thought or what suffering I inflicted? You know you did! And
that's all I've done. My instincts told me that those pages were my
natural provender. I had a perfect right to take them if I could. The
only people who would condemn me would be just those average
conventional persons for whom you have such a contempt. I expected
better things from _you_!"
"I cannot sit here another moment," declared the Duchess, rising. "It is
making me positively ill!"
"And me!" added Lady Muscombe. "I've been on the point of fainting
several times. I must say," she told Clarence, "this is _quite_ the
weirdest lunch I _ever_ sat through!"
"We will _all_ leave, Duchess," said the Queen. "I assure you I entirely
share your sentiments, and perhaps by this time even Edna----"
"I loathe him, Mother!" she said, shuddering; "I only hope I shall never
see his face again!"
"You hear that, sir?" said King Sidney, with more firmness than he
usually showed. "And, as the Princess Edna--er--voices the general
feeling, perhaps you'll see the propriety of getting out of this at
once?"
"It seems to me," said the Count, "that you are all making a great fuss
about nothing. If I'd eaten any of your pages I could understand it. But
I haven't--I never got the chance."
"Thanks to Clarence!" put in Queen Selina. "He saved the poor boys!"
"It was Miss Heritage, _really_, Mummy!" corrected Ruby jealously.
"_She_ wanted to know about the sack, or I shouldn't have asked."
"Miss Heritage!" muttered Edna. "Ah! I might have _known_ it!"
"Now just you be off to that castle of yours," said the King, addressing
the discomfited but quite unrepentant Ogre. "And mind you keep inside it
for the future. _You_ will see that he does that, Marshal? I don't want
any scandal about this business, but if I have any _more_ trouble from
you, I shall be forced--well, to take some very strong measures."
"I'm just going," said the Ogre calmly. "May I have my bag?"
"Confound your impudence, no!" returned the King, "I shall have the
beastly thing destroyed."
"Then I think you ought to give me back some of the money I paid for
it," said the Ogre. "I bought it from Master Xuriel, and I know you get
two-thirds the price of any article he sells. He told me so."
"You--you infamous scoundrel!" cried King Sidney, turning extremely red,
perhaps with anger. "Marshal, see this ruffian off the premises--and
look here, just send for that rascally astrologer, will you? I'll make
short work of _him_!"
"Farewell, then, to your Majesties," said the Ogre, with a jaunty wave
of his big hand. "And farewell to _you_, Princess Edna. If I have not
been as much of a Superman as I could wish, you may still find that I
have profited by your teachings."
The old Court Chamberlain's chest gave a loud crack as the Count
swaggered out.
"Thank goodness he's gone!" said Queen Selina. "Really, my dear Duchess,
and you, dear Lady Muscombe, I simply can't _say_ how distressed I am
that anything so unpleasant should have occurred while you were under
our roof. I do _hope_ you won't blame _me_. I always disliked the Count
myself--but I should never have dreamed of asking him to meet you if I
had known the sort of person he really _was_!"
"Indeed, Ma'am," said the Duchess, "I can quite believe _that_."
"And, after all," said Lady Muscombe languidly, "I dare say there are
lots of people in town--in houses where they don't keep a page, I
mean--who'd be glad enough to get him to come and dine. Society is so
much less exclusive than it used to be."
"That," remarked the Duchess, "entirely depends on what you mean by
'Society.' And now, Ma'am," she continued to her hostess, "as the
birds--I think you mentioned that they were storks--which brought us
here should be rested by this time, I shall be obliged if you will order
the car to take me back as soon as I have changed my dress."
"And me, too, if you don't mind," said Lady Muscombe. "I _must_ get home
before Nibbles does."
"Oh, but you mustn't leave us so soon!" protested Queen Selina in
dismay. "To come all this way for such a miserable little visit!"
"A flying visit, let us call it," said the Duchess. "But, candidly, this
country of yours doesn't suit me. I don't feel safe with characters such
as Ogres and Giants and Dragons about."
"But I assure your Grace there are very very few--hardly any, in fact!"
"There are more than my nerves can stand," said the Duchess, firmly, and
Queen Selina, though deeply mortified by her guests' eagerness to go,
found that she could no longer detain them.
The Court Chamberlain and his attendants brought the stork car to the
palace door by the time the visitors had resumed their former costumes.
"Good-bye, dear Duchess!" said the Queen. "So charmed to have seen you,
even for so short a time. I hope some day you will come again."
"I think it improbable," was the grim reply. "And if you'll allow me to
say so, Ma'am, when I do stay anywhere, I prefer a house where I can be
sure of the sort of people I am likely to meet."
"I say, Marchioness," cried Clarence, as he joined them on the steps,
"you're not really going, are you? I wish you'd stay on a bit. We were
getting on thundering well together, you and I!"
"Very sad, isn't it?" she answered, with a charming but slightly mocking
grimace. "But Nibbles wouldn't like me to stop here philandering with
Fairy Princes--even if they _aren't_ quite the real thing. Good-bye,
Ma'am," she added, with a gay little nod, as she stepped into the car,
where the Duchess was already seated. "Thanks so much for having me!
It's a wonderful house to stay in--and a most interesting experience."
"I have an impression," said the Duchess drowsily, "that I shall wake up
presently and find all this has been a dream. I trust so, but, if not,
would you mind telling this elderly gentleman to set me down in some
unfrequented part--_not_ Stratford Place, where I should attract more
attention than is at all desirable."
"That's a good idea, Duchess!" said Lady Muscombe. "He can drop us on
Clapham Common, and we can share a taxi home."
Queen Selina kissed her hand affectionately to them both as the storks
spread their great wings and the car slowly rose. But her salute was
not returned--principally for the reason that both ladies had already
closed their eyes in slumber.
"And we might have made those two women our friends for life!" she
lamented, as she went indoors. "I hope, Edna, my love, you see _now_
what comes of getting your own way?"
"If I have been mistaken for once," said Edna, in a spiritless tone,
"you needn't rub it in, Mother. I can't imagine now what I could ever
have seen in that detestable creature."
"Nor I--especially as you could see nothing in Prince Mirliflor, who
really _was_--no, my dear, I'm only speaking for your good. If I was
sure you regretted your treatment of him, I might perhaps find some
way----"
"I dare say I should act differently if he asked me again. But he won't.
This dreadful story is sure to get round to him somehow. Of course I'm
glad Ruprecht has been found out in time. But he need not have been
exposed so publicly! I _do_ resent that. And you heard what Ruby said?
Miss Heritage was at the bottom of it. She deliberately planned this to
humiliate me! And if you have the smallest consideration for me, Mother,
you will forbid her to appear at Court after this."
"I'm afraid she is a designing young person," admitted the Queen, "and I
have thought more than once lately of sending her home to England."
"Then do it, Mother. If you don't, I shall simply refuse to appear in
public myself, sooner than meet her."
"She shall go, my dear. I'll see the Court Godmother about it at once.
And don't let yourself get too downhearted over the other
affair--Prince Mirliflor, I mean. I've great hopes we can put that
right."
"I've just left poor darling Edna," she began, as soon as she found the
Fairy alone; "all this has been a terrible shock to her, as you may
imagine. But it seems I was right in thinking she never really cared for
that unspeakable man. He _terrified_ her into accepting him. And,
between ourselves, Godmother, I fancy that, if you _could_ induce Prince
Mirliflor to come forward again, he would not be sent away a second
time."
"So I should imagine, myself," said the Fairy drily. "But, as it
happens, owing to the result of my previous efforts, I have lost all
influence with Mirliflor. He and I have fallen out."
"But you could easily make it up with him. You might say she was really
in love with him from the first, only she wished to put him to the
proof--something of that sort. Tell him how delighted we should all be
to see him again. There's _another_ little matter I wished to speak to
you about. Edna has taken the strongest dislike to that Miss Heritage,
who I must say has acted most unwarrantably. I have made up my mind to
part with her, and I thought, if you would arrange to have her taken
back to England as soon as the car returns to-morrow----"
"Stop," said the Fairy, "I must have time to think over that." She had,
it is true, renounced all further interference in anybody's affairs, but
habit was too strong for her. Her old brain was busying itself once more
with the scheme she had abandoned--a scheme that would certainly not be
assisted by Daphne's expulsion from Märchenland. So she temporised.
"Yes," she said at last, "I quite see from what you tell me, that Lady
Daphne cannot remain at Court any longer. The difficulty is that I can't
send her back to England just yet. My storks will not be fit for so long
a flight again for a fortnight at the very least. I'm not going to have
them killed on her account. I could do _this_ for you. I could establish
her in a little pavilion in a distant part of the palace grounds and
keep her there, under my own eyes, till the storks are ready for another
journey. It's a very secluded place--almost a wilderness--and none of
the Court ever go near it."
"That seems an excellent plan," said the Queen. "But I shouldn't care
for them to know that she is a prisoner. They had better be told that
she has resigned her situation and left the Palace. And--you won't
forget my little hint--about Prince Mirliflor, you know?"
"I will bear it in mind. In fact, if you can spare me for a day or two,
I thought of going over to Clairdelune in the dove-chariot to-morrow and
having a little chat with him."
"Oh, by all means do!" said the Queen gratefully. "So kind of you to
take so much trouble!"
"It's more on his account than yours," replied the Fairy, with a candour
that might have been intended as complimentary. "But I don't guarantee
that anything will come of it--at all events for a considerable time."
"Indeed I quite understand that--that his wound can hardly be expected
to heal just yet."
The Fairy lost no time in conveying Daphne to the secret pavilion
without the knowledge of any of the Court. It was quite fit for
occupation, and supplied with all that was necessary for comfort; the
Court Godmother provided her with an attendant, and even procured some
ancient volumes of Märchenland history with which Daphne could beguile
her solitude.
That night the Court Godmother summoned up all her energies to send
Mirliflor another vision of Daphne. It was the best vision she had ever
transmitted, but it was terribly exhausting work, and she grumbled
bitterly to herself that the scheme she had in hand should demand these
excessive exertions.
But it was one of the good old-fashioned schemes which have always been
beloved by romantic but didactic Fairy Godmothers. It would test the
characters of Mirliflor and Daphne, and be valuable moral discipline for
both, while, if they came through it triumphantly, they would be amply
compensated for any temporary inconvenience. She had not engaged in an
affair of this kind for at least a century and a quarter, and she was
looking forward to a highly interesting and enjoyable experience. First
she must regain her influence over Mirliflor, but she thought she would
not find much difficulty in doing that.
The Astrologer Royal had been duly summoned before the King to explain
his dealings with the Ogre-Count. But he not unwisely preferred to
disappear instead, taking with him his books of spells and other
apparatus. It was reported that he had found refuge at Drachenstolz.
"Gone there, has he?" said King Sidney to the Marshal. "Better send
someone to arrest him."
"It would need an army, sire," said the Marshal, "and a long siege, to
enter the Castle."
"Oh, is that so?" said the King. "Well, then, have guards posted all
round to see that they don't get out. After all, so long as we keep
them boxed up there, they can't do any mischief." And the guards were
posted accordingly.
Poor Ruby was almost broken-hearted on hearing from her mother that her
beloved Miss Heritage had gone back to England without so much as a word
of farewell. The Court received the news with murmurs, and a strong
suspicion that she had not left of her own free will.
Clarence was in the deepest dejection. It was true that he had made no
advance of late in his pursuit of her, but so long as she remained there
had always been hope. Now that she was gone for ever, even his riding
and hunting became uninteresting and purposeless. What was the use of
excelling in them when she was not there to hear of his prowess?
Early that afternoon he returned from the forest, and, after spending a
few minutes in his own apartments, came down to his father's private
cabinet with a gloomy and slightly startled expression. He found King
Sidney alone and in better spirits than usual.
"Back from your hunting already, my boy?" he said.
"Had enough of it," said Clarence. "Felt a bit off it to-day, somehow."
"Ah, your mother and I are just in from a drive. There's no doubt
this--er--rupture with that disgusting fellow has brought about an
enormous improvement in the public feeling. We were cheered, my boy,
actually _cheered_!"
"It may be some time before you're cheered again, Guv'nor," said
Clarence. "I mean, you made a grand mistake in letting that little
perisher Xuriel sell those tables of his 'Under Royal patronage,' and
I'm afraid you'll hear of it before long."
"Eh, why, what's _wrong_ with them? They seemed to give perfect
satisfaction. Have there been any complaints?"
"There'll be lots if they all go like mine has. When I came in just now
I was feeling a bit peckish, so I got out my table. It laid itself right
enough, only the wine was stiff with wriggly things like tadpoles--and,
when I lifted the dish-cover, I'm hanged if there weren't a couple of
great fat snakes under it, hissing like tea-kettles! And I paid the
beggar a sack and a half of ducats for that table!"
"Most untradesmanlike!" said King Sidney indignantly. "Of course you can
make him return the money! No, you can't, though, I forgot--the fellow's
bolted!"
"I wasn't thinking so much of that," said Clarence, "but suppose all the
_other_ johnnies who've bought tables find they're wrong 'uns, and want
their money back--from _us_?"
"They wouldn't have a leg to stand on, my boy. It's a clear case of
'Caveat emptor.' But, after all, there's no reason at present to suppose
the other tables are--hem--in a similar condition to yours."
"It's to be hoped not," said Clarence. "There'll be the devil's own row
if they are."
Unfortunately it soon appeared that they were, and the numerous persons
in Eswareinmal who had purchased them felt their grievance so strongly
that they sent a large and somewhat turbulent deputation to demand an
audience from His Majesty.
King Sidney received them, indeed he could not very well avoid doing so,
as they forced their way to his presence. He did his best to reason
with them, pointing out the undeniable fact that no guarantee had been
given that the tables would last for ever, and that it was scarcely
surprising if, after being in constant use, they should begin to show
symptoms of wear and tear--a phrase which had the effect of infuriating
them almost to madness. Nor were they pacified when he quoted his maxim
of "Caveat emptor," and pointed out that, if people _would_ invest in
magic tables, some degree of trickery was only to be expected. His
arguments were lost on them. They had discovered somehow that the
greater part of their purchase money had gone to swell the Royal
revenues, and they clamoured for instant restitution.
So finally the King had recourse to his usual expedient. "Don't let us
have a row about this little matter, gentlemen," he said. "I'm anxious
to meet you if I can, and I tell you what I'll do. I'll have the Council
summoned at once. You can lay your claims before them, and if they can
see their way to granting you any compensation, we shall be as good
friends as ever again."
King Sidney's idea had been that the Council, if they decreed any
compensation at all, would do so from funds belonging to the State. It
appeared, however, that they did not consider this to be within their
powers. They decided that, as the Sovereign had enjoyed the greater part
of the profit on the sales of the self-supplying tables, he was bound to
refund the money, proportionate deductions being made for the period
during which each table had been in proper order. This required
elaborate calculations, but the Lord Treasurer had a wonderful head for
figures, and worked them out to such effect that there was only
moderate grumbling on the part of the creditors, all of whom received
rather more than their due, while a good many had never bought a table
at all.
So, on the whole, the decision satisfied all except the Royal Family.
"It's easy to be generous with other people's money!" said the King.
"But this business has nearly cleared us out. That confounded Treasurer
hasn't left us more than a dozen sacks or so to go on with. He's
suggested that I might try to get a loan from the King of
Goldenbergenland. I'm told he's wealthy, so perhaps he'd be willing to
oblige a fellow-monarch, if I gave him the mine as security."
"That mine?" said Clarence. "Why, it doesn't cover its working
expenses--and never will, with the wages we pay those miner-johnnies!"
"Most exorbitant," said the King; "I've been thinking of--hem--bringing
back those yellow gnomes. They wouldn't want wages--and the mine would
be healthier for them than those marshes they're draining."
"It might," agreed Clarence, "if there were any of the poor little
beggars left. But I believe the climate has been too much for 'em."
"Has it, though? I'm afraid they must have neglected to take proper
precautions. Very ungrateful, after all I've done for them! But it's no
use trying to benefit _that_ class of persons. I see that now."
Clarence still wore his pendant, though he rode less and less
frequently. The Marshal told him that there was excellent carp-fishing
to be had on the Crystal Lake a few miles from Eswareinmal, and he took
up this sport, making solitary expeditions to the lake, from which he
returned in better spirits for a time. But even this occupation soon
palled, and the whole Court were struck by his increasing dejection,
which, rightly or wrongly, they attributed to the absence of Lady
Daphne.