CHAPTER XVII

"IF LOVE YOU CHOOSE, THEN LOVE SHALL BE YOUR RUIN"

Paul and his companion walked down the avenue in silence, and turned

into the narrow, stony road which wound across the moor. The storm was

over, and the rain had ceased. Above them, only faintly visible, as

though seen through a canopy of delicate lace, the stars were shining

in a cloudless sky through the wreaths of faint grey mist. Far off,

the sound of the sea came rolling across the moor to their ears, now

loud and threatening as it beat against the iron cliffs and thundered

up the coombs, now striking a shriller note as the huge waves, ever

beaten off, retreated, dragging beach and shingle with them. It

had been an ocean gale, and the very air was salt and brackish with

flavours of the sea. Here and there great piles of seaweed had been

carried in a heterogeneous mass to their feet, and the ground beneath

them was soft and sandy. But the storm had died away as suddenly as it

had come. The tall, stark pine trees, which a few hours ago had been

bending like whips before the rushing wind, stood now stiff and stark

against the wan sky. There was not even motion enough in the air to

clear away the white mists which hung around. Only the troubled sea

remained to mark the passage of the storm.

Paul was in no mood for talking. He recognised the fact that what had

happened to him that evening must, to a certain extent, colour his

whole life. He wanted to think it over quietly, now that he was away

from the influence of Adrea's passionately beautiful face and pleading

eyes. He had an inward sense of great disappointment in himself, and

he was anxious to see how far this was justified. He was prepared for

a rigid self-examination, and he was impatient to begin upon it.

But, while he was still upon the threshold of his meditations, his

companion's voice sounded in his ear.

"Paul de Vaux, I have a word or two to say to you."

Paul awoke with a start. "Certainly!" he said gravely. "I am ready."

Father Adrian continued, speaking slowly and keeping his eyes fixed

steadily upon Paul; "Only a few nights ago we met amongst the ruins of

your old Abbey. You will remember that I spoke to you of your father's

last hours, of a strange story confided to my keeping--a story of sin

and of sorrow--a story casting its shadow far into the future. You

remember this?"

"Perfectly!"

"At first you seemed to consider that this story, told to me on

his deathbed by a man who was at least repentant, should be held

sacred--sacred to me as a priest of the Holy Church, and sacred to you

as his son. Yet, as you saw afterwards, it was not so. The confession

was made to me as a man; and withal it was made by one outside the

pale of any religion whatever. It was mine to do as I chose with! It

is mine now!"

"If it is anything which concerns me, or the honour of my family, you

should tell me. If it involves wrongs which should be righted, or in

any way concerns the future, you should tell me. You must have come

for that purpose! You must mean to eventually, or why should you have

found your way to this out-of-the-way corner of the world. Let me hear

it now, Father Adrian!"

"It will darken your life!"

"I do not believe it! At any rate I will judge for myself. Let me hear

it!"

The priest looked away into the darkness, and his voice was low and

hoarse. "You do not know what you ask!" he said. "No, I shall not tell

you yet. It is for your own sake! Sometimes I think that I will go

away and never tell you."

"Why not? You came here for no other reason."

Father Adrian shook his head. "I did not come to tell you. It was

your home I came to see. Many hundreds of years ago Vaux Abbey was a

monastery, sacred to the saint whose name I unworthily bear. My visit

here was half a pilgrimage! But," he went on, his brows contracting,

and his eyes gleaming fire, "since I came, I have been perilously near

striking the blow which I have power to strike. You bear a name which

for centuries was foremost in the history of our sacred Church. For

generation after generation the De Vauxs were good Catholics and the

benefactors of their Church. Your chapel was richly adorned, and five

priests dwelt here always with old Sir Roland de Vaux. And now, where

is your chapel, once the most beautiful in England; it is a pile of

ruins, like your faith! I wander round in your villages. Your tenants

have gone the way of their lord. Roman Catholicism is a dying power.

Hideous chapels have sprung up in all your districts! The true faith

is neglected! And who is to blame for it all? Your recreant family.

You, who should have been the most zealous upholders of religion, have

drifted down the stream of fashion, nerveless and indifferent. Oh! it

is heresy, rank heresy, to think of a De Vaux, such as you, dwelling

indifferent amongst the mighty associations of your name and home! I

wander about amongst those magnificent ruins of yours, aesthetically

beautiful, but nevertheless a living, burning reproach, and I ask

myself whether I do well in holding my peace. I cannot tell! I cannot

tell!"

Paul was moved in spite of himself by the vehemence of his companion's

words. The horrors of that deathbed scene at Cruta had never grown dim

to him. He had always felt that his father had only decided to

keep something back from him in those last moments, after a bitter

struggle; and he was now quite sure that whatever it might have been,

the secret had been confided to this priest.

"I want to ask you a question," he said. "Whatever this mystery may be

to which you are constantly alluding, I am of course ignorant. But you

seem to have some understanding with the two women whom we have left

this evening. I want to know whether Adrea is concerned in it."

"She is not!"

"Nor Madame de Merteuill?"

"I cannot tell you!"

They were in the Abbey grounds, close to the ruins, and the moorland

lay behind them, with its floating mists and vague obscurity. Here the

sky was soft and clear, and every pillar amongst the ruins stood out

against the empty background of sea and sky. Father Adrian paused.

"I will come no further," he said. "I am a saner man away from your

despoiled home. There is just a last word which I have to say to you."

Paul stood still, and listened.

"I have borne much," Father Adrian said, "much tempting and many

impulses; but I have zealously put a watch upon my tongue, and I

have spared you. For the future, your happiness--nay, your future

itself--is in your own hands. I saw your father kill the only relative

Adrea had in this world. We saw the deed done, though we have both

held our peace concerning it. Paul de Vaux, I am inclined to spare you

a great blow which it is in my power to strike. I am inclined to spare

you, but I make one hard and fast condition. Adrea is not for you! She

must be neither your wife, nor your friend, nor your ward! There must

be no dealings, no knowledge between you the one of the other! There

is blood between you; it can never be wiped out! The stain is forever.

Lift up your hand to heaven, and swear that you will never willingly

look upon her face again, or, as God is my master, I will bring upon

your name, and your family, and you, swift and everlasting shame!"

His hand fell to his side, and his voice, which had been vibrating

with passion, died away in a little, suppressed sob. Paul looked at

him steadily. The perspiration was standing out upon his forehead in

great beads, and his eyes were dry and brilliant. The man was shaken

to the very core, and in the strange upheaval of passion he had

altogether lost his sacerdotality. It was the man who had spoken, the

man, passionate and sensuous, deeply moved through every chord of his

being. The "priest" had fallen away from him, the remembrance of it

seemed almost grotesque. Paul, too, had caught much of the passionate

excitement of the moment.

"Time!" he said hoarsely. "I must have time. A few days only. I ask no

questions! Only how long?"

"A week!" the priest answered. "A week to-night we meet here!"

A Monk of Cruta · 第 17 / 36 章