The stage is more beholding[124] to love than the life of man; for as
to the stage, love is ever matter of comedies, and now and then of
tragedies; but in life it doth much mischief, sometimes like a Siren,
sometimes like a Fury. You may observe, that, amongst all the great
and worthy persons (whereof the memory remaineth, either ancient or
recent), there is not one that hath been transported to the mad degree
of love, which shows that great spirits and great business do keep out
this weak passion. You must except, nevertheless, Marcus Antonius,
the half partner of the empire of Rome, and Appius Claudius,[125] the
decemvir and lawgiver; whereof the former was indeed a voluptuous
man, and inordinate, but the latter was an austere and wise man; and
therefore it seems (though rarely) that love can find entrance, not
only into an open heart, but also into a heart well fortified, if watch
be not well kept. It is a poor saying of Epicurus, “Satis magnum alter
alteri theatrum sumus;”[126] as if man, made for the contemplation
of heaven and all noble objects, should do nothing but kneel before
a little idol, and make himself subject, though not of the mouth (as
beasts are) yet of the eye, which was given him for higher purposes.
It is a strange thing to note the excess of this passion, and how it
braves the nature and value of things, by this, that the speaking in
a perpetual hyperbole is comely in nothing but in love, neither is it
merely in the phrase; for whereas it hath been well said, “That the
arch flatterer, with whom all the petty flatterers have intelligence,
is a man’s self;” certainly, the lover is more; for there was never
proud man thought so absurdly well of himself as the lover doth of the
person loved; and therefore it was well said, “That it is impossible
to love and to be wise.”[127] Neither doth this weakness appear to
others only, and not to the party loved, but to the loved most of
all, except the love be reciprocal; for it is a true rule, that love
is ever rewarded, either with the reciprocal, or with an inward and
secret contempt; by how much the more men ought to beware of this
passion, which loseth not only other things, but itself. As for the
other losses, the poet’s relation[128] doth well figure them: “That
he that preferred Helena, quitted the gifts of Juno and Pallas;” for
whosoever esteemeth too much of amorous affection, quitteth both riches
and wisdom. This passion hath his floods in the very times of weakness,
which are, great prosperity and great adversity, though this latter
hath been less observed; both which times kindle love, and make it more
fervent, and therefore show it to be the child of folly. They do best
who, if they cannot but admit love, yet make it keep quarter, and sever
it wholly from their serious affairs and actions of life; for if it
check once with business, it troubleth men’s fortunes, and maketh men
that they can nowise be true to their own ends. I know not how, but
martial men are given to love; I think it is, but as they are given
to wine, for perils commonly ask to be paid in pleasures. There is in
man’s nature a secret inclination and motion towards love of others,
which, if it be not spent upon some one or a few, doth naturally spread
itself towards many, and maketh men become humane and charitable, as it
is seen sometimes in friars. Nuptial love maketh mankind, friendly love
perfecteth it, but wanton love corrupted and embaseth it.