_Afric Shores_
Thus is what I says to myself, very first crack out of the box and I
subsequent sees no reason for to change my views. But this night at the
Pastime when the subject is brung forward for discussion, I just lurks
in a corner, not saying nothing myself but doing some very vigorous
listening. Being a new member, the way I is, I prefers not to declare
myself in at the go-off but just to sort of hang back and catch the
general drift of the old heads before I commits myself.
Regardless of your private convictions it don't hurt you none,
sometimes, to throw in with the majority. Traveling with the current
instead of against it, you maybe is not so prominent but you gets fewer
bumps across your head. A minnow sliding downstream with a passel of
other minnows stands a heap better chance of leading a pleasant life
than if he strives for to conspicious himself by swimming upstream all
by himself. Old Brother Channel Cat is liable to come sauntering down
past the towhead and see him going along there all alone, and open wide
that there big mouth of his and then, little Mr. Minnow, I asks you,
where is you?
So I sets and hearkens to the pow-wowing. It seems that two or three
present has been swept right off their feet by the masterful preachments
of this here Gabriel the Black Prophet. They is all organized up for to
accept him as the chosen apostle of the colored race. It looks like they
can't hardly wait for the blessed day to come when they'll pull out with
him. They 'lows a lot of these here overbearing white folks is going to
feel mighty funny the morning they wakes up and finds that all the black
folks is done up and gone from 'em and there ain't nobody left for to
pack their heavy burdens for 'em and wait on 'em, without they turns in
and does it themselves. They says a lot more like that. And pretty soon
the old camp-meeting tone comes creeping into their voices and their
eyes starts shining like they was repentant sinners gathered at the
mourners' bench and they begins to sort of sing their words and
generally work themselves up into a state of grace.
Right about then this here U. S. G. Petty, which they calls him 'Lisses
for short, speaks up. Until now he has been reared back in his chair
listening, the same as I is. But now he opens up and his words hits them
onthusiastic ones like a dipperful of ice-water throwed in their faces.
He says to 'em, he says:
"W'en does all you niggers 'at's so homesick fur the sight of the dear
Affikin shore aims to start on yore jubilatin' way? I is heared a lot
tonight an' other times, too, 'bout this yere journey. I is heared it
called a crusade an' a pilgrimage an' a whole passel of other fancy
names. But so fur, nobody ain't confided to me the details of the
departure."
"The fust batch goes ez soon ez the fust boat is ready," says one of the
true believers, name of Oscar Jordan. "An' the rest will follow wid
rejoicin' on the other boats of the fleet, ez they is made ready."
"Well, me, I ain't seen hair nur hide of one boat yit," says 'Lisses,
"let alone it's a whole fleet."
"But ain't you seen the pitcher of her in the litrychure w'ich the Black
Prophet give out?" says Oscar.
"I has, Brother," says 'Lisses; "I suttinly has. I also has seen
pitchers of the late Kaiser Ex-Wilhellum of Germany, but that ain't no
sign I 'spects to meet him strollin' up Lenox Avenue some pleasant
mawnin' this comin' week."
"Yas, but the bindin' paymints is done been made on the fust ship," says
Oscar. "The Grand Treasurer, w'ich he is the Black Prophet's
brother-in-law by marriage, he announce' the full perticulars at the
las' monster mass meetin'. He specify she is to have a cullid brass-band
on bode an' a cullid string-band an' a cullid crew an' a cullid cap'n
an'----"
"Uh huh!" says 'Lisses, "A cullid cap'n, huh? All right, boy, you kin
give yore confidences to a cullid cap'n ef you's a-mind to. But,
speakin' ez yore friend an' well-wisher I should advise you at the same
time w'en you is pickin' out your fav'rit' cullid cap'n 'at you lakwise
also picks out yore fav'rit' flower fur display at the memorial services
in case of a storm comin' up on the way acrost the high seas. 'Cause,"
he says, "it stands to reason the higher them seas is the deeper they
is; an' ef you gits yo'se'f drownded out yonder it'll be a tho'ough job.
Mind you," he says, "I ain't sayin' nothin' agin my own race so long ez
they remains whar they natchelly belongs, w'ich is on the solid ground.
But ef I'm goin' journey acros't the broad Newlantic Ocean I craves me a
w'ite cap'n--yas, an' a w'ite crew, too."
One or two, including this here Oscar, tries to break in on him but he
keeps right on. He says to 'em, he says:
"I wonder is you Ole Home-Weekers been figgerin' out how you is goin'
git control of yore beloved native Affika w'en you arrives safely
tharin? Seems lak to me tha's a p'int w'ich you better be payin' a
right smart attention to it befo'hand. 'Cause, frum whut I kin gather,
w'ite folks is done already laid claim to the most part of Affika w'ich
is fit fur a Christian to live in. I bet you wharever they is a
diamond-mine or a gold diggin's or an ivory-mine or anythin' wuth
havin', you'll find a bunch of w'ite men roostin' close't by, wid
'Posted' signs up on every hand. Whut does you aim to do 'en?"
"They ain't got no right fur to be thar in the fust place," says Oscar.
"The Prophet done oratate fully 'bout that. Didn't Affika belong to us
black folkses to begin wid? Has we ever deeded it away? No, that we
ain't! Then it's still our'n, ain't it? So, therefo', we goes back in
force an' th'ough our chosen leaders we demands 'at these yere
trespassers re-hands it back over to its rightful owners, w'ich," he
says, "tha's us."
"Even so," says 'Lisses, "even so. You lands an' you demands--an' 'en
whut? This yere country belonged once't upon a time to the Injuns. An'
w'ite folks come along an' chiseled 'em out of it, didn't they? They
shore did so! But I ain't heared 'bout no gin'el movemint in favor of
turnin' it back over ag'in to the Injuns. The Injuns mout feel
that-a-way but I ain't 'spectin' to see many w'ite folkses votin' in
favor of it.
"Lis'sen: Once't you let w'ite folks git they feets rooted in the ground
an' they stays fast, reguardless of whut the former perprietors may
think 'bout it. W'ite folks in gin'el is very funny that way an' more
'specially ef they is Angler-Saxons. I don't know, myse'f, whar this
yere Angler-Saxony is. I done look fur it on the map an' 'tain't thar. I
reckin so many Angler-Saxons must a-moved off to other parts of the
world seekin' whut they could confisticate unto theyselves 'at the
'riginal country they hailed frum has done vanish'. Jedgin' by they
names, some of 'em must a-been Scotch an' some of 'em must a-been Irish
and plenty more of 'em must a-been English; but no matter whut they
names is, they is all alak in one respec': an' tha's clingin' fast to
all the onimproved real-estate w'ich they gits they hands on. I knows,
'cause I wuz born and brung up 'mongst 'em down in No'th Ca'lina. An'
they is still a right smart sprinklin' of 'em lef' 'round these yere
No'the'n parts, too. You jest try to mek 'em give up somethin' w'ich
they desires fur to keep on keepin' it, an' you'll find 'em a powerful
onhealthy crowd to prank wid. They's a heap of talk," he says, "'bout
the other races, w'ich is pourin' in yere, crowdin' 'em plum out of Noo
Yawk City in time, notwithstandin' of 'em havin' been amongst the fust
settlers yere. But lemme tell you somethin': Ef they wuzn' but two of
them Angler-Saxons lef' in this whole town I bet you one of 'em would be
the mayor an' the other'd be the chief of police. Next to holdin' on to
the land, runnin' the gov'mint is the most fav'rit' sport they follows
after.
"An'," he says, "ef 'at is true of this yere country, you tek it frum me
it's true of Affika. Me, I looks fur a lot of cullid fun'els to tek
place befo' you has yore wish 'bout regainin' yore former homestids over
thar," he says. Then his tone sort of changes. "But," he says, "I has
jest been statin' the argumints on the No side. I wants to be fair, so I
will lakwise 'low there's somethin' to be said on yore side, too. In
fact," he says, "ef only the suitable 'rangemints kin be made
befo'hand, I aims to onlist myse'f in wid the movemint an' give to it,"
he says, "my most hearties' suppo't."
That seems to sort of take 'em by surprise. This here Oscar Jordan,
being the most gabby one, is the first to get over his surprisement.
"How come you kin feel that way, 'Lisses," he says, "w'en fur the pas'
ten minutes you been preachifyin' agin the whole notion? How come you
willin' fur to remove yo'se'f off to the perposed All-Affikin Republic
ef you holds them views w'ich you jest expound?"
"Who, me?" says 'Lisses. "You got me wrong! I ain't aimin' to remove
myse'f nowhars. I is mos' comfor'ble whar I is at. No suh, what I aims
to do is to 'tach myse'f to the collector's office yere at home an'
handle the money-dues ez they comes a-rollin' in frum the rest of you
niggers. That's goin' be me an' my job--collectin' an' also
disbursin'--'specially the las'-named."
I rises from where I is setting and I crosses to him and I extends to
him the right hand of fellowship and I says to him, I says:
"You," I says, "an' me both! I nominates myse'f to he'p you wid them
duties. Brother Petty," I says, "you speaks words of wisdom w'ich they
sounds lak my own. Le's us two promenade fo'th into the fresh air of the
evenin'," I says, "an' exchange mo' views on the subjec's of the day. I
feels," I says, "'at we is goin' be agreeable companions one to the
other an' vice or versa."
So from that hour we becomes good friends and sees quite much of one
another. And the more I sees of him the better the cut of his jib seems
to suit me. He follows after cornet-playing for a living. He plays in
the orchestra at the Colored Crescent Vaudeville Theatre on the corner
below where the Pastime Club is, so, what with him being in the
profession and us friends and all, I thinks of him the next minute after
this big idea comes to me up at the studio and that's why I goes seeking
for him in West One-Hundred and Thirty-fifth Street; which without much
trouble I finds him. I takes him aside and I starts telling him what I
has in my mind. Before I has been speechifying to him more than a minute
I can tell he's getting interested and he begs me for to continue. And
when I gets through he's just acclamatious over the notion of going in
partners with me on the proposition. So we spends the rest of the day
and until far into the night discussing the thing from every angle.