(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)
I doubt if Messrs. ASQUITH, CHURCHILL, EDMOND, LLOYD GEORGE, or even
Colonel SEELY have leisure these days for novel-reading, and, if they
have, they might be reluctant to devote it to _The Ulsterman_
(HUTCHINSON). It does not treat of their favourite subject and, so far
from offering any solution of extant difficulties, adds yet another
complication to the Home Rule question. Everything from revenue to
religion having been discussed, no one but Mr. F. FRANKFORT MOORE has
thought to deal with the love interest. What is to be done, the tale
suggests, for the young lovers in the North whose families are loyal to
different sovereigns? _Ned_ was the son of a stalwart, if somewhat
snobbish, adherent of His Majesty KING GEORGE THE FIFTH; _Kate_ was the
daughter of a would-be subject of the Divine DEVLIN, and things could
never have gone well with them had it not been for the intervention of
_Ned's_ uncle, who had been so long out of Ireland that he had ceased to
cherish any keen feelings in the dispute, and had been so used by his
brother in the past that he was only too glad of the opportunity of
spiting him by getting his son married to a Papist. But there are other
cases, where no such facilities are at hand, and, if Mr. MOORE'S picture
is a true one, it must go hard with such couples. What is to be done for
them? Are they to be told to wait six years and see? I hope not, for
whatever they might see in the period could have no interest for them?
This matrimonial difficulty is one, at any rate, which, as all must
agree, even that reputed panacea, the General Election, cannot be
expected to cure.
* * * * *
I think I never met a book more "racily" written--in a special sense of
the word--than _The Progress of Prudence_ (MILLS AND BOON). Horses and
hounds play so large a part therein as almost to be the protagonists;
certainly they are the chief influencing forces in the development of
the heroine, from the day when she attempts to purchase one of the pack,
under the impression that they are being exhibited for sale, to that
other day, some time later, when her own entry finishes second in the
Grand National. You will notice that _Prudence_ had progressed
considerably during the interval. Her early ignorance was due to the
fact that she had only just developed from a slum factory-girl into a
landed proprietress. The father of _Prudence_ had been a miser; and,
when he died in the attic where he and the girl had miserably lived, he
left her a fortune, and instructions to spend it on real estate. So Mr.
W. F. HEWER starts us on a pretty problem--how, in these circumstances,
will _Prudence_ get on? Of course, she gets on excellently; and
soon is as keen a rider to hounds and a judge of horseflesh as any
in a neighbourhood where those accomplishments are held in high
esteem. Equally of course there are men, nay lords, who fall under
the spell of her attraction; but when I tell you that the
groom-and-general-horse-master, whom _Prudence_ engaged, and under whose
tuition she so prospered, was a gentleman who had seen better days, you
will probably have already guessed the end of the tale. This is reached
after some scenes of pleasant humour and sentiment, and after I don't
know how many runs with hounds, given with a minuteness of detail that
shows Mr. HEWER to be a practised master of his subject. The same remark
applies to the various meetings at which _Prudence_ (surely a little
oddly named?) sees her colours carried to victory. Altogether a
stablesque romance that should appeal irresistibly to its own public.
* * * * *
_The Mailing of Blaise_ is Mr. A. S. TURBERVILLE'S first novel, and it
is easy to understand why Messrs. SIDGWICK AND JACKSON have drawn
attention to this fact. For the work reveals a great ignorance of, or a
supreme contempt for, the art of construction, and its theme is very
hackneyed; but at the same time Mr. TURBERVILLE observes so keenly that
I groan in the spirit when I think of so much labour misspent on a
subject unworthy of his talent. Here we have a boy with the artistic
temperament born into the house of one _Brown_, a Cheapside tailor with
puritanical prejudices and the mind of a sparrow. He and his rather
futile wife were enough to make anyone rebellious; but too much irony is
spent upon them, and it would have been less difficult to sympathise
with _Philip_ if his parents' point of view had been more fairly stated.
After many domestic frictions the son rushes away from London and lives
a Bohemian life (extremely well described) on the Continent, until he
marries a delightful and penniless wife. All the marks for charm go to
_Athénée_, unless a few of them can be spared for their child, _Blaise_,
who had, or so it seems to me, great trouble in thrusting his way upon
the scenes. _Philip_ and _Athénée_ were going to do great things for
their son, but unfortunately both of them were killed while he was still
a little child, and he had to be retrieved to the bosom of the _Brown_
family. The change from freedom to rigorous conventionality did not suit
poor _Blaise_, and I could not be very sorry when he annoyed most of the
_Browns_ by catching measles and petrified all of them by not
recovering. Still, he lived long enough to get his name into the title,
though this, I feel, was a bit of favouritism.
* * * * *
_The Way Home_, by BASIL KING (METHUEN), describes the spiritual
wanderings of a New Yorker, _Charlie Grace_, destined for the ministry;
rejecting it, because of his disillusionment through the practice of the
professing Christians about him, in favour of a hunt for the money which
alone he finds can earn respect; adopting in business the inverted
Christian motto, "Down the other fellow before he downs you"; drifting
in and out of loves clean and sordid; and finally, broken in health,
discovering the way, through the bitterness of a deeper disillusionment,
back to an estranged wife; and yet another way to somewhere near the
faith of his childhood and the peace of resignation. Barely is so
serious a theme treated by a novelist with such simplicity, sincerity
and eloquent reticence. Nobody need fear the dulness known as "pi-jaw."
The story is full of interest. The characterisation, extraordinarily
careful and balanced, is conveyed not only in description but in the
cleverly-constructed dialogue. It is part of the author's skill to
represent _Hilda_, _Charlie's_ wife, with her charming reserve and
dignity, as not a little difficult and exacting, and so to divide our
sympathies fairly between the two. There are many other living
characters, of which old _Remnant_, the sexton, with his queerly
American business notions of religion and dislike of the "riff-raff," is
too nicely absurd and human not to have been drawn from life. There is
very good stuff indeed in this book, which seems to me in every way an
advance upon _The Street Called Straight_.
* * * * *
It is all a matter of taste. If you like that sort of book you will like
_The Great Attempt_ (MURRAY), for Mr. FREDERICK ARTHUR'S story is quite
good of its kind. But what sort of a book is it? Well, on page 31 one
character says to another character, "Now listen. Thou knowest that
there is some mystery regarding the heir to the estate. He is said to be
in hiding abroad. The truth is that they have cheated him out of his
inheritance and he can't do anything until he finds his papers." And yet
it is not entirely that sort of book, for Mr. ARTHUR is evidently a
thoughtful student of history, and he has drawn quite a vivid picture of
the events leading up to the battle of Culloden. His sympathies are on
the side of the PRETENDER and his cause, and he can see nothing to
approve of in the ranks of the Hanoverians. I am content to take his
word for the rights and wrongs of the case. The whole matter leaves me a
little cold. I have no actual grievance against the OLD PRETENDER,
though BONNIE PRINCE CHARLIE is one of my pet aversions; but I consider
that enough fiction has been written about him already. In the matter of
subjects for novels I should like to institute an _Index Expurgatorius_.
It would contain the two PRETENDERS, the French Revolution, the American
Civil War, NAPOLEON, and most of the other well-worn names and events of
history, and would remove a powerful temptation from the path of the
young author. Missing heirs in search of papers I do not so much mind.
Indeed, I am on the whole fond of missing heirs. But missing heirs with
an historical background make me tired.
* * * * *
[Illustration: OUR CURIO CRANKS.
_Enthusiast (to diner who has just told a good story)._ "WOULD YOU MIND
REPEATING THAT? IT HAS BEEN SO WELL RECEIVED. I WISH TO ADD IT TO MY
COLLECTION OF RECORDS OF GOOD THINGS."]
* * * * *
Doing the Hat Trick in Two.
"H. S. O. Ashington, who won three events last year, was expected
to repeat the achievement yesterday. He figured in the hurdles,
high and long jumps, and if he had not taken the high jump, which
he won at 5ft. 8in., the probability is that he would have done the
hat trick. His initial exertions, however, told against his
hurdling."
_Daily News._
Unfortunately the absence of them would have told still more against his
high-jumping.
* * * * *
"Dr. John A. Bassin performed a surgical operation at Poughkeepsie,
New York, on a boy whose heart was too weak to permit the use of an
anaesthetic, and who was lulled into unconsciousness by the strains
of 'Highland Fling.'"
To make this story more credible the _Singapore Free Press_ heads it
"DACOITS IN BURMA."