On another new clause, providing for the administration of Southern
Ireland in the event of a Parliament not being set up, Mr. ASQUITH
declared that "this musty remainder biscuit" had reduced him to
"rhetorical poverty." Perhaps that was why he could get no more than
ten Members to follow him into the Lobby against it.
[Illustration: THE OLD SHEEP-DOG.
_Mr. ASQUITH._ "TUT-TUT! TO THINK THAT I COULD ONLY ROUND UP TEN OF
'EM!"]
_Tuesday, November 9th._--In supporting Lord PARMOOR'S protest against
the arrest, at Holyhead, of an English lady by order of the Irish
Executive, Lord BUCKMASTER regretted that there was no one in the
House of Lords responsible for the Irish Office, and consequently
"they were always compelled to accept official answers." A strictly
official answer was all he got from Lord CRAWFORD, who declared that
the arrest had been made under the authority of D.O.R.A., and gave
their Lordships the surely otiose reminder that "conditions were not
quite simple or normal in Ireland just now."
Mr. SHORTT has formed his style on the model of one of his
predecessors in office, who used to be described as the Quite-at-Home
Secretary, and he declined to share Colonel BURN'S alarm at the
prevalence of revolutionary speeches. Hyde Park, he reminded him, had
always been regarded as a safety-valve for discontented people. Even
Mr. L'ESTRANGE MALONE'S recent reference to Ministers and lamp-posts
did not at that moment disturb him.
The new Ministry of Health Bill had a rather rough passage, and, if
the voting had been in accordance with the speeches, it would hardly
have secured a second reading. Particular objection was raised to the
proposal to put the hospitals on the rates. Mr. MYERS, however, was
sarcastic at the expense of people who thought that "rates and taxes
must be saved though the people perished," and declared that there was
plenty of war wealth to be drawn upon.
Lieut.-Colonel HURST objected to the term "working-class" in the Bill.
It would encourage the Socialistic fallacy that the people of England
were divided into two classes--the leisured class and the working
class; whereas everybody knew that most of the "leisured class" had no
leisure and many of the "working-class" did no work.
_Wednesday, November 10th._--The Peers welcomed Lord BUXTON on his
advancement to an earldom, and then proceeded to discuss the rights
of the inhabitants of Heligoland. Having been handed over to Germany
against their will in 1890, they hoped that the Treaty of Versailles
would restore them to British nationality. On the contrary the Treaty
has resulted in the island being swamped by German workmen employed in
destroying the fortifications. Lord CRAWFORD considered that the new
electoral law requiring three years' residence would safeguard the
islanders from being politically submerged, and wisely did not enter
into the question of how long the island itself would remain after the
fortifications had disappeared.
In the Commons the INDIAN SECRETARY underwent his usual Wednesday
cross-examination. He did not display quite his customary urbanity.
When an hon. Member, whose long and distinguished Indian service began
in the year in which Mr. MONTAGU was born, ventured to suggest that
he should check Mr. GANDHI'S appeals to ignorance and fanaticism,
he tartly replied that ignorance and fanaticism were very dangerous
things, "whether in India or on the benches of this House."
Mr. STEWART expressed anxiety lest under the new arrangements
with Egypt the Sudan water-supply should be subjected to Egyptian
interference. Mr. HARMSWORTH was of opinion that for geographical
reasons the Sudan would always be able to look after its own
water-supply; _vide_ the leading case of _Wolf_ v. _Lamb_.
_Thursday, November 11th._--The PRIME MINISTER was in a more
aggressive mood than usual. Mr. DEVLIN, who was noisily incredulous as
to the existence of a Sinn Fein conspiracy with Germany in 1918, was
advised to wait for the documents about to be published. To make
things even, an ultra-Conservative Member, who urged the suspension
of Mr. FISHER'S new Act, was informed that the PRIME MINISTER could
conceive nothing more serious than that the nation should decide that
it could not afford to give children a good education.
Any doubts as to the suitability of Armistice Day for the Third
Reading of the Government of Ireland Bill were removed by the tone of
the debate. The possibility that the "Unknown Warrior" might have been
an Irishman softened the feeling on both sides, and though Mr. ADAMSON
feared that the Bill would bring Ireland not peace but a sword, and
Mr. ASQUITH appealed to the Government to substitute a measure more
generous to Irish aspirations, there was no sting in either of their
speeches. The PRIME MINISTER, while defending his scheme as the best
that could be granted in the present temper of Southern Ireland, did
not bang the door against further negotiations; and Sir EDWARD CARSON
said that Ulstermen were beginning to realize that the Parliament
thrust upon them might be a blessing in disguise, and expressed the
hope that in working it they would set an example of tolerance and
justice to all classes. Barely a third of the House took part in the
division, and no Irish Member voted for the Third Reading, which was
carried by 183 votes to 52; but, having regard to the influence of the
unexpected in Irish affairs, this apparent apathy may be a good sign.
After thirty-five years of acute strife, Home Rule for Ireland is, at
any rate, no longer a party question.
* * * * *
[Illustration: "NOW, SERIOUSLY, MR. WIGGINS, CAN YOU RECOMMEND THE
LAMB THIS WEEK?"
"WELL, MA'AM, IT ALL DEPENDS WHAT YOU WANT IT FOR. IF YOU WERE
THINKIN' OF EATIN' IT, SPEAKIN' AS MAN TO MAN, I SHOULD SAY 'NO.'"]
* * * * *
Jones minor wants to know if the letter "T," used to designate the new
super-bus, stands for "TARQUINIUS."
* * * * *