to the dispraise of a rich man and couetous. Thou hast a misers minde
(thou hast a princes pelfe) a lewde terme to be spoken of a princes
treasure, which in no respect nor for any cause is to be called pelfe,
though it were neuer so meane, for pelfe is properly the scrappes or
shreds of taylors and of skinners, which are accompted of so vile price as
they be commonly cast out of dores, or otherwise bestowed vpon base
purposes: and carrieth not the like reason or decencie, as when we say in
reproch of a niggard or vserer, or worldly couetous man, that he setteth
more by a little pelfe of the world, than by his credit or health, or
conscience. For in comparison of these treasours, all the gold or siluer
in the world may by a skornefull terme be called pelfe, & so ye see that
the reason of the decencie holdeth not alike in both cases. Now let vs
passe from these examples, to treate of those that concerne the
comelinesse and decencie of mans behauiour.
And some speech may be whan it is spoken very vndecent, and yet the same
hauing afterward somewhat added to it may become prety and decent, as was
the stowte worde vfed by a captaine in Fraunce, who sitting at the lower
end of the Duke of _Guyses_ table among many, the day after there had bene
a great battaile foughten, the Duke finding that this captaine was not
seene that day to do any thing in the field, taxed him priuily thus in al
the hearings. Where were you Sir the day of the battaile, for I saw ye
not? the captaine answered promptly: where ye durst not haue bene: and the
Duke began to kindle with the worde, which the Gentleman perceiuing, said
spedily: I was that day among the carriages, where your excellencie would
not for a thousand crownes haue bene seene. Thus from vndecent it came by
a wittie reformation to be made decent againe.
The like hapned on a time at the Duke of Northumberlandes bourd, where
merry _John Heywood_ was allowed to sit at the tables end. The Duke had a
very noble and honorable mynde always to pay his debts well, and when he
lacked money, would not stick to sell the greatest part of his plate: so
had he done few dayes before. _Heywood_ being loth to call for his drinke
so oft as he was dry, turned his eye toward the cupbord and sayd I finde
great misse of your graces standing cups: the Duke thinking he had spoken
it of some knowledge that his plate was lately sold, said somewhat
sharpely, why Sir will not those cuppes serue as good a man as your selfe.
_Heywood_ readily replied. Yes if it please your grace, but I would haue
one of them stand still at myne elbow full of drinke that I might not be
driuen to trouble your men so often to call for it. This pleasant and
speedy reuers of the former wordes holpe all the matter againe, whereupon
the Duke became very pleasaunt and dranke a bolle of wine to _Heywood_,
and bid a cup should alwayes be standing by him.
It were to busie a peece of worke for me to tell you of all the partes of
decencie and indecency which haue bene obserued in the speaches of man &
in his writings, and this that I tell you is rather to solace your eares
with pretie conceits after a sort of long scholasticall preceptes which
may happen haue doubled them, rather then for any other purpose of
institution or doctrine, which to any Courtier of experience, is not
necessarie in this behalfe. And as they appeare by the former examples to
rest in our speach and writing: so do the same by like proportion consist
in the whole behauiour of man, and that which he doth well and commendably
is euer decent, and the contrary vndecent, not in euery mans iudgement
alwayes one, but after their seuerall discretion and by circumstance
diuersly, as by the next Chapter shalbe shewed.
_CHAP. XXIIII._
_Of decencie in behauiour which also belongs to the consideration of the
Poet or maker._
And there is a decency to be obserued in euery mans action & behauiour
aswell as in his speach & writing which some peraduenture would thinke
impertinent to be treated of in this booke, where we do but informe the
commendable fashions of language & stile: but that is otherwise, for the
good maker or poet who is in decent speach & good termes to describe all
things and with prayse or dispraise to report euery mans behauiour, ought
to know the comlinesse of an action aswell as of a word & thereby to
direct himselfe both in praise & perswation or any other point that
perteines to the Oratours arte. Wherefore some examples we will set downe
of this maner of decency in behauiour leauing you for the rest to our
booke which we haue written _de Decoro_, where ye shall see both partes
handled more exactly. And this decencie of mans behauiour aswell as of his
speach must also be deemed by discretion, in which regard the thing that
may well become one man to do may not become another, and that which is
seemely to be done in this place is not so seemely in that, and at such a
time decent, but at another time vndecent, and in such a case and for such
a purpose, and to this and that end and by this and that euent, perusing
all the circumstances with like consideration. Therefore we say that it
might become king _Alexander_ to giue a hundreth talentes to _Anaxagoras_
the Philosopher, but not for a beggerly Philosopher to accept so great a
gift, for such a Prince could not be impouerished by that expence, but the
Philosopher was by it excessiuely to be enriched, so was the kings action
proportionable to his estate and therefore decent, the Philosophers,
disproportionable both to his profession and calling and therefore
indecent.
And yet if we shall examine the same point with a clearer discretion, it
may be said that whatsoeuer it might become king _Alexander_ of his regal
largesse to bestow vpon a poore Philosopher vnasked, that might aswell
become the Philosopher to receiue at his hands without refusal, and had
otherwise bene some empeachement of the kings abilitie or wisedome, which
had not bene decent in the Philosopher, nor the immoderatenesse of the
kinges gift in respect of the Philosophers meane estate made his
acceptance the lesse decent, since Princes liberalities are not measured
by merite nor by other mens estimations, but by their owne appetites and
according to their greatnesse. So said king _Alexander_ very like himselfe
to one _Perillus_ to whom he had geuen a very great gift, which he made
curtesy to accept, saying it was too much for such a mean person, what
quoth the king if it be too much for thy self, hast thou neuer a friend or
kinsman that may fare the better by it? But peraduenture if any such
immoderat gift had bene craued by the Philosopher and not voluntarily
offred by the king it had bene vndecent to haue taken it. Euen so if one
that standeth vpon his merite, and spares to craue the Princes liberalitie
in that which is moderate and fit for him, doth vndecently. For men should
not expect till the Prince remembred it of himselfe and began as it were
the gratification, but ought to be put in remembraunce by humble
folicitations, and that is duetifull, & decent, which made king _Henry_
th'eight her Maiesties most noble father, and for liberality nothing
inferiour to king _Alexander_ the great, aunswere one of his priuie
chamber, who prayd him to be good & gracious to a certaine old Knight
being his seruant for that he was but an ill begger, if he be ashamed to
begge we wil thinke scorne to giue. And yet peraduenture in both these
cases, the vndecencie for too much crauing or sparing to craue, might be
easily holpen by a decent magnificence in the Prince, as _Amazas_ king of
_Ægypt_ very honorably considered, who asking one day for one _Diopithus_
a noble man of his Court, what was become of him for that he had not sene
him wait of long time, one about the king told him that he heard say he
was sicke and of some conceit he had taken that his Maiestie had but
slenderly looked to him, vsing many others very bountifully. I beshrew his
fooles head quoth the king, why had he not sued vnto vs and made vs pruie
of his want, then added, but in truth we are most to blame our selues, who
by a mindeful beneficence without sute should haue supplied his
bashfullnesse, and forthwith commaunded a great reward in money & pension
to be sent vnto him, but it hapned that when the kings messengers entred
the chamber of _Diopithus_, he had newly giuen vp the ghost: the
messengers sorrowed the case, and _Diopithus_ friends sate by and wept,
not so much for _Diopithus_ death, as for pitie that he ouerliued not the
comming of the kings reward. Therupon it came euer after to be vsed for a
prouerbe that when any good turne commeth too late to be vsed, to cal it
_Diopithus_ reward.
In Italy and Fraunce I haue knowen it vsed for common pollicie, the
Princes to differre the bestowing of their great liberalities as
Cardinalships and other high dignities & offices of gayne, till the
parties whom they should seeme to gratifie be so old or so sicke as it is
not likely they should long enioy them.
In the time of _Charles_ the ninth French king, I being at the Spaw
waters, there lay a Marshall of Fraunce called _Monsieur de Sipier_, to
vse those waters for his health, but when the Phisitions had all giuen him
vp, and that there was no hope of life in him, came from the king to him a
letters patents of six thousand crownes yearely pension during his life
with many comfortable wordes: the man was not so much past remembraunce,
but he could say to the messenger _trop tard_, _trop tard_, it should haue
come before, for in deede it had bene promised long and came not till now
that he could not fare the better by it.
And it became king _Antiochus_, better to bestow the faire Lady
_Stratonica_ his wife vpon his sonne _Demetrius_, who lay sicke for her
loue and would else haue perished, as the Physitions cunningly discouered
by the beating of his pulse, then it could become _Demetrius_ to be
inamored with his fathers wife, or to enioy her of his guilt, because the
fathers act was led by discretion and of a fatherly compassion, not
grutching to depart from his deerest possession to saue his childes life,
where as the sonne in his appetite had no reason to lead him to loue
vnlawfully, for whom it had rather bene decent to die, then to haue
violated his fathers bed with safetie of his life.
No more would it be seemely for an aged man to play the wanton like a
child, for it stands not with the conueniency of nature, yet when king
_Agesilaus_ hauing a great sort of little children, was one day disposed
to solace himself among them in a gallery where they plaied, and tooke a
little hobby horse of wood and bestrid it to keepe them in play, one of
his friends seemed to mislike his lightnes, o good friend quoth
_Agesilaus_, rebuke me not for this fault till thou haue children of thine
owne, shewing in deede that it came not of vanitie but of a fatherly
affection, ioying in the sport and company of his little children, in
which respect and as that place and time serued, it was dispenceable in
him & not indecent.
And in the choise of a man's delights & maner of his life, there is a
decencie, and so we say th'old man generally is no fit companion for the
young man, nor the rich for the poore, nor the wise for the foolish. Yet
in some respects and by discretion it may be otherwise, as when the old
man hath the gouernment of the young, the wise teaches the foolish, the
rich is wayted on by the poore for their reliefe, in which regard the
conuersation is not indecent.
And _Proclus_ the Philosopher knowing how euery indecencie is vnpleasant
to nature, and namely, how vncomely a thing it is for young men to doe as
old men doe (at leastwise as young men for the most part doe take it)
applyed it very wittily to his purpose: for hauing his sonne and heire a
notable vnthrift, & delighting in nothing but in haukes and hounds and gay
apparrell, and such like vanities, which neither by gentle nor sharpe
admonitions of his father, could make him leaue. _Proclus_ himselfe not
onely bare with his sonne, but also vsed it himselfe for company, which
some of his frends greatly rebuked him for, saying, o _Proclus_, an olde
man and a Philosopher to play the foole and lasciuious more than the
sonne. Mary, quoth _Proclus_, & therefore I do it, for it is the next way
to make my sonne change his life, when he shall see how vndecent it is in
me to leade such a life, and for him being a yong man, to keepe companie
with me being an old man, and to doe that which I doe.
So is it not vnseemely for any ordinarie Captaine to winne the victory or
any other auantage in warre by fraud & breach of faith: as _Hanniball_
with the Romans, but it could not well become the Romaines managing so
great an Empire, by examples of honour and iustice to doe as _Hanniball_
did. And when _Parmenio_ in a like case perswaded king _Alexander_ to
breake the day of his appointment, and to set vpon _Darius_ at the
sodaine, which _Alexander_ refused to doe, _Parmenio_ saying, I would doe
it if I were _Alexander_, and I too quoth _Alexander_ if I were
_Parmenio_: but it behooueth me in honour to fight liberally with mine
enemies, and iustly to ouercome. And thus ye see that was decent in
_Parmenios_ action, which was not in the king his masters.
A great nobleman and Counseller in this Realme was secretlie aduised by
his friend, not to vse so much writing his letters in fauour of euery man
that asked them, specially to the Iudges of the Realme in cases of
iustice. To whom the noble man answered, it becomes vs Councellors better
to vse instance for our friend, then for the Iudges to sentence at
instance: for whatsoeuer we doe require them, it is in their choise to
refuse to doe, but for all that the example was ill and dangerous.
And there is a decencie in chusing the times of a mans busines, and as the
Spaniard sayes, _es tiempo de negotiar_, there is a fitte time for euery
man to performe his businesse in, & to attend his affaires, which out of
that time would be vndecent: as to sleepe al day and wake al night, and to
goe a hunting by torch-light as an old Earle of Arundel vsed to doe, or
for any occasion of little importance, to wake a man out of his sleepe, or
to make him rise from his dinner to talke with him, or such like
importunities, for so we call euery vnseasonable action, and the
vndecencie of time.
_Callicrasides_ being sent Ambassador by the Lacedemonians, to _Cirus the
young king of Persia to contract him for money and men toward their warres
against the Athenians, came to the Court at such vnseasonable time as the
king was yet in the midst of his dinner and went away againe saying, it is
now no time to interrupt the kings mirth. He came againe another day in
the after noone, and finding the king ar a rere-banquet, and to haue taken
the wine somewhat plentifully, turned back againe, saying, I thinke there
is no houre fitte to deal with _Cirus_, for he is euer in his banquets; I
will rather leaue all business vndone, then doe any thing that shall not
become the Lacedemonians: meaning to offer conference of so great
importance to his Countrey, with a man so distempered by surfet as hee was
not likely to geue him any reasonable resolution in the cause.
One _Eudamidas_ brother to the king _Agis_ of _Lacedemonia_, coming by
_Zenocrates_ schoole and looking in, saw him sit in his chaire, disputing
with a long hoare beard, asked who it was, one answered, Sir it is a wise
man and one of them searches after virtue, and if he haue not yet found it
quoth _Eudamidas_ when will he vse it, that now at his yeares is seeking
after it, as who would say it is not time to talke of matters when they
should be put in execution nor for an old man to be to seeke what virtue
is, which all his youth he should haue had in exercise.
Another time coming to heare a notable Philosopher dispute, it happened,
that all was ended euen as he came, and one of his familiars would haue
had him requested the Philosopher to beginner againe, that were indecent
and nothing ciuill quoth _Eudamidas_, for if he should come to me
supperlesse when I had supped before, were it seemely for him to pray me
to suppe againe for his companie?
And the place makes a thing decent or indecent, in which consideration one
_Eubondae_ being sent Embassadour into a forraine realme, some of his
familiars tooke occasion at the table to praise the wines and women of
that country in prefence of their owne husbands, which th'embassadour
mislikes, and when supper was ended and the guestes departed, tooke his
familiars aside, and told them that is was nothing decent in a strange
country to praise thewomen, nor specially a wife before her husbands face,
for inconueniencie that might rise thereby, aswell to the prayser as to
the woman, and that the chief commendation of a chaste matrone, was to be
known onely to her husband, and not to be observed by strangers and
guestes.
And in the vse of apparel there is no little decency and vndecencie to be
perceiued, as well for the fashion as the stuffe, for it is comely that
euery estate and vocation should be knowen by the differences of their
habit: a Clarke from a lay man: a gentleman from a yeoman: a souldier from
a citizen, and the chief of euery degree from their inferiours, because in
confusion and disorder there is no manner of decencie.
The Romaines of any other people most seuere censurers of decencie,
thought no vpper garment so comely for a ciuill man as a long playted
qowne, because it sheweth much grauitie & also pudicitie, hiding euery
member of the body which had not bin pleasant to behold. In somuch as a
certain _Proconsull_ or Legat of theirs dealing one day with _Ptolome_
king of Egypt, seeing him clad in a straite narrow garment very
licentiously, disclosing euery part of his body, gave him a great checke
for it: and said that vnlesse he vsed more saf and comely garments, the
Romaines would take no pleasure to hold amitie with him, for by the
wantonness of his garment they would iudge the vanitie of his mind, not to
be worthy of their constant friendship. A pleasant old courtier wearing
one day in the sight of a great councellour, after the new guise a French
cloake scarce reaching to the wast, a long beaked doublet hanging downe to
his thies, & an high paire of silke netherstocks that couered all his
buttocks and loignes the Councellor marueled to see him in that sort
disguised, and otherwise than he had binwoont to be. Sir quoth the
Gentleman to excuse it: if I should not be able whan I had need to pisse
out of my doublet, and to do the rest in my netherstocks (vsing the plaine
terme) all men would say that I was but a lowte, the Councellor laughed
hartily at the absurditie of the speech, but what those sower fellows of
Rome haue said trowe ye? truly in mine opinion, that all such persons as
take pleasure to shew their limbes, specially those that natures hath
commanded out of sight, should be inioyned either to go starke naked, or
else to resort backe to the comely and modest fashion of their owne
countrie apparel, vsed by their old honourable auncestors.
And there is a decency of apparel in respect of the place where it is to
be vsed: in the Court to be richely apparelled: in the countrey to weare
more plain & homely garments. For who would not thinke it a ridiculous
thing to see a Lady in her milke-house with a velvet gowne, and at a
bridal in her cassock of mockado: a Gentleman of the Countrey among the
bushes and briers, goes in a pounced dublet and a paire of embroidered
hosen, the the Cities to weare a fries Ierkin and a paire of leather
breeches? yet some such phantasticals haue I knowen, and one a certaine
knight, of all other the most vaine, who commonly would come to the
Sessions, and other ordinarie meetings and Commissions in the Countrey, so
bedect with buttons and aglets of gold and such costly embroideries, as
the poore plaine men of the Countrey called him for his gaynesse, the
golden knight. Another for the like cause was called Saint Sunday; I
thinke at this day they be so farre spent, as either of them would be
content with a good cloath cloake: and this came by want of discretion, to
discerne and deeme right of decencie, which many Gentlemen doe wholly
limite by the person or degree where reason doeth it by the place and
presence: which may be such as it might very well become a great Prince to
wear courser apparel than in another place or presence a meaner person.
Neuerthelesse in the vse of a garment many occasions alter the decencies,
sometimes the qualities of the person, sometimes of the case, otherwise
the countrie custome, and often the constitution of lawes, and the very
nature of vse it selfe. As for example a king and prince may vse rich and
gorgeous apparel decently so cannot a meane person doo, yet if an herald
of armes to whom a king giueth his gowne of cloth of gold, or to whom it
was incident as a fee of his office, do were the same, he doth it
decently, because such hath alwaise bene th'allowances of heraldes: but if
such herald haue worne out, or sold, or lost that gowne, to buy him a new
of the like stuffe with his owne mony and to weare it, is not decent in
the eye and iudgement of them that know it.
And the country custome maketh things decent in ves as in Asia for all men
to weare long gownes both a foot and horsebacke: in Europa short
gaberdins, or clokes, or iackets, euen for their vpper garments. The Turke
and Persian to weare great tolibants of ten, fifteene, and twentie elles
of linen a peece vpon their heads, which can not be remooued: in Europe to
were caps or hats, which vpon euery occasion of salutation we vse to put
of as a signe of reuerence. In th'East partes the men to make water
couring like women, with vs standing as a wall. With them to congratulat
and salute by giuing a becke with the head, or a bende of the bodies, with
vs here in England, and in Germany, and all other Northern parts of the
world to shake handes. In France, Italie, and Spaine to embrace ouer the
shoulder, vnder the armes, at the very knees, according the superiors
degree. With vs the wemen giue their mouth to be kissed in other places
their cheek, in many places their hand, or in steed of an offer to the
hand, to say these words _Beso los manos_. And yet some others surmounting
in all courtly ciuilitie will say, _Los manos & los piedes_. And aboue
that reach too, there be that will say to the Ladies, _Lombra de fus
pisadae_, the shadow of your steps. Which I recite vnto you to shew the
phrase of those courtly seruitours in yeelding the mistresses honour and
reuerence.
And it is seen that very particular vse of it selfe makes a matter of much
decencie and vndecencie, without any countrey custome or allowance, as if
one that hath many yeares worne a gowne shall come to be seen weare a
iakquet or ierkin, or he that hath many yeares worne a beard or long haire
among those that had done the contrary, and come sodainly to be pold and
shauen, it will seeme not only to himself, a deshight and very vndecent,
but also to all others that neuer vsed to go so, vntill the time and
custome haue abrogated that mislike.
So it was in England till her Maiesties most noble father for diuers good
respects, caused his owne head and all his Courtiers to be polled and his
beard to be cut short. Before that was thought more decent both for old
men and young to be all shauen and to weare long haire either rounded or
square. Now againe at this time, the young Gentlemen of the Court haue
taken vp the long haire trayling on their shoulders, and thinke it more
decent: for what respect I would be glad to know.