Why I send the Miller's Friedrich and not a princess through the
Guelzow Wood; why Friedrich called the Bailiff Besserdich,
"Father-in-law;" how he "decoyed the dog from behind the
stove;" and how Luth, the messenger, could not help laughing at
his own Burmeister.
If any little Miss who reads this book should feel angry with me for
beginning this chapter with a miller's man and not with a princess, she
must remember that there could be no princesses at all, if there were
no millers' men, and that sometimes a miller's man is of more value
than a princess--for example, to me at this moment. For, if I want to
catch the French chasseur, I must not send a princess, with a crinoline
and satin shoes, through the Guelzow Wood in such weather and along such
roads,--but a miller's man. And, best of all, the Miller's Friedrich.
"Dumouriez!" said Friedrich, as he followed the chasseur's track, "if
the Frenchman is to be found between here and Gripswold, I'll have
him."
Friedrich traced the chasseur through the Stemhagen Wood, and through
the Guelzow Wood, and at last reached the Guelzow road; but there he came
to a standstill--an owl would have been puzzled; there was nothing to
serve as a guide. Had the fellow turned to the right or to the left?
For a while Friedrich stood there--like Matz Fots of Dresden; but soon
a bright thought flashed across him, and he said to himself,--"If the
rascal has taken the road to Stemhagen, it must have been through sheer
stupidity. No, the fellow has gone towards Guelzow." And he went that
way accordingly.
At Guelzow, Freier, an old peasant, was standing by his hedge, throwing
stones, as big round as the brim of your hat, into the holes in the
road. In some places in Mecklenburg this is what they call "mending the
roads."
"Good morning, Freier; have you seen a Frenchman pass by here this
morning?" said Friedrich.
"A Frenchman?" asked Freier.
"Yes," said Friedrich; "a French chasseur."
"A chasseur?" asked Freier.
"Yes, in a green uniform," said Friedrich.
"On horseback?" asked Freier.
"No, on foot," said Friedrich.
"What does he want?" asked Freier?
"What does he want?" asked Friedrich. "_He_ doesn't want anything; but
_I_ want to speak to him."
"What have you got to speak about to a Frenchman?"
"Dumouriez!" said Friedrich. "What business is that of yours, you
blockhead? I only ask you if you have seen such a fellow?"
"In a green uniform?" asked Freier.
"Yes," said Friedrich.
"With a shako?"
"No, with his head bare."
"With his head bare! And this morning in the rain?"
"Yes, you hear, I tell you so," cried Friedrich, angrily. "Just answer
me simply: have you seen the fellow or have you not?"
"Wait a moment. Isn't to-day Thursday?"
"Yes," said Friedrich.
"Well, then it was not to-day; it was last Monday, and there were a lot
of them, but in blue uniforms, and on horseback; and my boy, Zamel, has
gone to-day to Stemhagen with our team for them."
"Freier," said Friedrich, "you should not have sent your team to
Stemhagen; you can make a better use of it yourself, especially when
you've got to give answers to people."
"How so?" asked Freier.
"And Freier," pursued Friedrich; "I know what would be a good
employment for you--driving crabs to Berlin; a fellow like you would
get on well at that."
"What do you mean?" asked Freier, more and more mystified.
"Oh, nothing," said Friedrich. "And now, good-morning, Freier. And if
the Frenchman I am looking for should come by, just tell him, that I
said, that you said, that your great grandmother had told you, when he
said what he said, that you should say, that I had said he was not to
call you an ass. And now good-bye, Freier."
"What?" said Freier, following him with his eyes as he went along the
village, and turning round in his hands a stone of some thirty pounds
weight; "What? _He_ said, that _I_ said, that _you_ said, that _I_
should say, he should not call me an ass? The cursed Prussian rascal!
That's the way he always does." And he took the stone and threw it,
with all his might--amongst the rest.
Friedrich goes further. Bailiff Besserdich looks out at his doorway.
"Bailiff, have you seen a Frenchman pass by here this morning?"
"A Frenchman?" asked the bailiff. "Well, they are not so rare just now
as all that; but this morning, do you say?"
"What, are _you_ going to begin asking questions now?" said Friedrich.
"I would rather tell you the story at once; it's the quickest plan." So
he told him the story. "And," he concluded, "I must have him."
"That you must, Friedrich," said the bailiff. "And I will go with you;
in fact it's what I'm appointed for; and our Herr Amtshauptmann said to
me lately--'Besserdich,' said he, 'on you depends everything in
Guelzow,' and he gave me a bundle of papers, and said, 'the matter is
_pressing_.' Well, I got the summoner to read them to me, and when he
had done, he said: 'The matter requires the greatest speed, bailiff.'
'No,' said I, 'I know better; the Herr Amtshauptmann told me the matter
was _pressing_, and whenever he's said that to me before, I have always
waited a full month first, and been ready in good time all the same!'
And so I was that time. But, Friedrich, your business is not
_pressing_, it 'requires the greatest speed.' I will just fetch my hat
and then we will go."
This done, they set off. As they came out on the road at the other end
of the village, the bailiff said--
"Friedrich, my Hans--you know the boy; he's now in his sixteenth year,
but I thought I would have him at home for a year or so longer--he's
keeping the sheep here in the rye-field; for, you see, I thought to
myself my fodder has run short, and at this time of year they can get
a meal for themselves in the fields, so I'll turn them out here;--he
has perhaps seen the fellow."
They now asked Hans. Yes, the boy had seen him; he had gone to Pinnow.
At Pinnow they passed the schoolmaster's, and asked whether he had seen
a Frenchman.
The schoolmaster's name was "Sparrow," but he was always called
"Bullfinch;" some said, because he could sing so well; others, because
he hopped about and poked his nose everywhere, and was always chaffing.
The Bullfinch found it easy to lead the bailiff by the nose, but
Friedrich soon saw what was going on; and, when he saw that the
Bullfinch made a sign to his wife to row in the same boat with him, he
thought to himself--"Wait a moment, I'll make you look blue presently;"
and he got up, and said he wished to go and light his pipe at the
kitchen fire.
The Bullfinch now began to overwhelm the bailiff with all sorts of
stories; and when Besserdich succeeded in getting in a word, and asked
whether they had not seen the Frenchman, the Bullfinch said no, and his
wife also said, no.
Whilst they were going on in this way. Friedrich came in again, and
said: "Something must have happened to your chimney, for the stick with
the sausages has fallen down on to the ground."
The wife jumped up, ran out to the kitchen, and then came hack with the
stick in her hand--"Look there now! This is the thanks we get! That
shameless fellow has stolen one of our sausages."
"What fellow?" asked Friedrich.
"Why, the French fellow you were asking about."
"Oh! so he has been here then, has he?" said Friedrich.
"I should think so! And Sparrow gave him some brandy and some
bread-and-butter, and showed him the way to Demzin!"
"Well, good-bye, then," said Friedrich. "Come along, bailiff; we know
all we want now."
"Bailiff," said Friedrich, when they were some way from Pinnow and
the Bullfinch, "you are a sort of man of law, and must needs know
this--what is the punishment for stealing a sausage?"
"Well, Friedrich," replied the bailiff, "I don't know about sausages,
but I know very well the punishment for stealing a flitch of bacon; for
when the lame shoemaker took one of mine out of the smoke, the Herr
Amtshauptmann gave him a fortnight in prison and a dozen on his jacket
into the bargain."
"Well, that's not dangerous," said Friedrich; "and, if you reckon
according to that, it would be precious little for one sausage."
"How do you make that out?"
"Well now, bailiff, tell me; when you kill seven pigs, how many
flitches of bacon do you get?"
"Fourteen," said the bailiff.
"That's not true," said Friedrich; "you only get thirteen. One is taken
for the sausages."
"Yes, you're right," said the bailiff.
"Well then, how many sausages does your wife make out of seven pigs?
About thirty, doesn't she? Then one flitch makes thirty sausages; and
so, for one sausage, there would be, at most, half a day and half a
blow; and that I consider is a righteous and merciful punishment; you
may at once give me the half-blow on my back, and the half-day I will
spend next Sunday afternoon in your house, in the corner behind the
stove. For, look here--_I_ took the Bullfinch's sausage."
"What Devil tempted you to do that?"
"No Devil, only hunger," said Friedrich, and he drew the sausage out of
his pocket, and cut off a piece. "Here Bailiff! The sausage is good,
you can eat it without bread."
"No," said the Bailiff, "I'll have nothing to do with stolen goods."
"How, Stolen?" asked Friedrich. "This is merely 'forage' as we used to
say under the Duke of Brunswick. And, Bailiff, surely you have climbed
up into the priest's apple-tree often enough before now."
"The Devil only knows what is the matter with you this morning!" said
Besserdich. "Yes, I have when I was a silly youngster; but now I have
grown-up children, and must set them a good example."
"That's true," said Friedrich; "what one may do, another
mayn't.--Bailiff," he added, after a while, "how old is your daughter
Hanchen?"
"Well, Friedrich," said the Bailiff, and his eyes began to twinkle,
"she's not old, she is only just eighteen; but I tell you, she's as
sharp as a needle."
"I know that," said Friedrich; "I sat by her side yesterday evening up
at the Stemhagen Schloss, and I can fully say she pleased me so well
that I should be ready to change my state to please her."
"Come, come, you are going too fast," said the Bailiff, and he looked
at Friedrich from top to toe.
"Yes," said Friedrich, "and I thought you might find some other farm
for your Fritz; and, as you are getting old you might lay yourself on
the shelf, and could give us your land; and then Hanchen and I should
have a nice home, and you would have a deal of pleasure in us.
"By Heaven!" cried the Bailiff, "are you really in earnest?"
"Why not?" said Friedrich; "do I look as if I were joking?"
"What?" cried Besserdich; "An old beggar like you want to marry a
Bailiff's daughter! _My_ daughter! A young girl of eighteen!"
"Mind what you're saying. Bailiff," said Fritz. "Old, say you? Just
look at me, I am in my prime,--between twenty and fifty. A beggar, say
you? I have never asked you for so much as a pipe of tobacco. It's true
your Hanchen is, on the whole, younger than I am, but I don't object to
that. I'll take her all the same, for she is clever, and knows that a
fellow like me who has seen the world, is worth more than one of your
young peasants with red cheeks and flaxen hair, who makes a bow like a
clasp-knife and spits about in folk's rooms."
"Have you been putting these notions in the girl's head?" shouted the
Bailiff, raising his stick against him.
"Put down your stick, Bailiff," said Friedrich; "what would people say
if they heard that I had been fighting with my father-in-law, in the
open country, before the wedding?"
The Bailiff let his stick drop.
"No, I could take a sausage from a fellow like the Bullfinch,"
Friedrich went on; "but I could not cheat a pretty, young thing like
that of her happiness; I put no notions into your Hanchen's head."
The Bailiff looked at him out of the corner of his eye as if he would
say, "The Devil may trust you!" but he said nothing. They now went on
again,--but the egg was broken.
When they arrived at Demzin, Friedrich went up to a young clerk who was
standing near them and said: "I beg your pardon, have you seen a
Frenchman pass by?" And so on, and so on. The young man said yes; that
rather less than an hour before, such a fellow had passed.
They walked through the village, and, at the other end an old woman had
also seen the Chasseur. "We shall soon have him now," said Friedrich.
But a little further on they met, in the fields, an old man who was
cutting willows near the path and he knew nothing of any Frenchman, and
said the fellow had not passed since six o'clock in the morning.
What vas to be done now? Follow the road straight on? That would be a
regular wild-goose chase. But the fellow had certainly gone out of the
village; where had he stopped?
The Bailiff scratched his head; Friedrich looked all round and surveyed
the country. At last he said;--"We can go no further, Bailiff; the
trace is at an end here; so we must think the matter over. But the wind
is cold, let us go and sit down by that oven yonder."[4]
Well, they did so. "What a fool I was," said the Bailiff, "to go
running after a Frenchman in this weather!"
"Father-in-law, leave the Frenchman alone," said Friedrich; "we shall
get him yet."
"Are you going to begin again with your 'fathers-in-law,' you Prussian
knave?"
"What you are not, you may become. Bailiff.--I have known many people
who have given their daughters and plenty of money into the bargain,
for that name."
"Yes, but then they got rather different sons-in-law."
"Now, just look at me, Bailiff," said Friedrich, and he placed himself
before the Bailiff as erect as he could make himself; "I'm not a
lawyer, nor yet a doctor, but I have sound bones, and my hands speak of
work. And if you don't trust your own eyes you can ask my Miller."
"Yes, and do you know what he'll say? He'll say you are steady enough
and understand a thing or two, but that your sayings are not the sort
to 'tice a dog away from a warm stove (oven)."
"I'll soon show you whether they are. But now, Bailiff, will you give
me your Hanchen?"
"Damnation!" cried the Bailiff. "I thought at first it was only a joke.
But now I do believe you're in earnest."
"I _was_ joking about the farm and your laying yourself on the shelf,
Bailiff," said Friedrich, "for your Fritz must of course have the farm.
But I am in earnest about Hanchen, and I shall easily get a farm."
"You boaster!" said the Bailiff; "there now, that's one of your
sayings, which, as I said, will 'tice no dog away from a stove."
"I will show you if they can or not," said Friedrich.
"You braggart!" said the Bailiff, getting up; "I shall go home, and you
can go and catch your Frenchman by yourself."
"I have got him," said Friedrich.
"You sack of lies!" again cried the Bailiff.
"Bailiff," said Friedrich; "if the Frenchman stands before you in three
minutes, and so my sayings entice a dog away from an oven, will you
give me your Hanchen?" And he held his hand out to him.--"Shake hands
upon it."
"There's my hand," cried the Bailiff; "just to show you that you are
nothing but a boasting braggart."
And they shook hands on it. Friedrich gave a broad grin and stooped
down to the mouth of the oven:
"Mossoo, allong ici--allong ici."--And what should creep out into the
light but the Frenchman!
"Eh! Damn...!" cried the Bailiff.
"_Pardon, Monsieur_," said the Frenchman.
"Who has won the bet now, Bailiff?" asked Friedrich. "Here is the
Frenchman and the dog too. Who is to have your Hanchen now?"
"Prussian vagabond," cried the Bailiff, and raised his stick again, "Do
you think you can fool me into this? _You_ have my Hanchen...! I would
rather ..."
"Put down your stick, Bailiff, you frighten the Frenchman. Better come
over here and help me to secure him; we can talk about the bet
afterwards."
"_Pardon_," threw in the Chasseur.
"Pardong here, and pardong there," cried Friedrich; "what do you mean
by running away from the beech-tree where I had laid you comfortably.
This time I'll treat you in my fashion; Mamsell Westphalen is not here
now," and, so saying, he cut the buttons off the Frenchman's trowsers:
"And now, allong, avang!"--And in this way, they set off back through
Demzin towards Pinnow.
The Bailiff walked by their side in the heavy rain, silent--and angry,
though chiefly with himself; for whenever he tried to throw the blame
on Friedrich's shoulders, he could not help saying to himself: "He is a
rascal,--but he's a devilish clever fellow too. How could he know, I
wonder, that the Frenchman was lying in the oven. And then his cutting
off the buttons, what could he mean by that? I must make a note of the
trick."
When they came to Guelzow, Friedrich said:--"Why, Bailiff, who is that
coming hunting along over your field? What is he riding like that for?
He cannot ride faster than the rain."
"Heavens!" said the Bailiff; "why that is Inspector Braesig's brown
mare, and the man on it is the Stemhagen Burmeister."
My father approached, and when he saw the Frenchman and Friedrich he
said: "Now it's _all_ right."--"But," he added, "first to your house,
Bailiff, for my soul is freezing in my body, and I am wet to the skin."
"I see you are, sir; and we are pretty much in the same state."
Arrived at the Bailiff's house, all sorts of clothes were brought to
light by the Bailiff's goodwoman, but it was hard work to provide for
all three, for the bad times had made sad havoc in the Bailiff's
wardrobe, and they were glad enough to find anything that would even
half fit them. The Bailiff could get no other covering for himself than
his own trowsers, Friedrich made himself look very fine in Fritz's
Sunday coat, and my father, as the smallest, had to content himself
with Hans's jacket, which of course the Bailiff did not wish, and made
all sorts of excuses for. But when a person finds himself in safety
after being in an unpleasant predicament, and in a dry place after
being out in the rain, mirth readily gets the upper hand, and my
father, on seeing himself in his costume, laughed till the tears rolled
down his cheeks.
"But," said he, suddenly checking himself, and becoming quite grave,
"here are we laughing when there is a fellow-being amongst us,
shivering, not only with cold but with fear; and we ought to do what we
can for him. Dame, you must help the Frenchman to some dry things."
But that was not so easy, and when they had hunted up everything else,
they had to make up with the Bailiff's wife's old grey skirt.
"Eat heartily, comrade," said Friedrich, as they sat round the table
eating the afternoon meal, and he pushed a piece of salt meat of some
three pounds weight towards the Frenchman,--"Eat, comrade, for as long
as you eat, you will live."
My father took pity on the fellow, and spoke a few words to him in
French in a comforting tone, and the poor sinner answered so humbly and
dejectedly that it quite moved the Bailiff, though he understood not a
word of what was said, and he leant over to my father: "Shall we let
the fellow go, Herr Burmeister?"
My father said, no; that would not do. The Miller and the Baker were in
trouble, and had done no wrong; the Frenchman was also in trouble, but
he had done wrong; and right was right and what was fair to one was
fair to another.
The Bailiff's Fritz just then came riding into the yard with the team,
and came into the room.
"Good evening, father," said he; "I have got off from the French," and
he shook hands with the Bailiff, and then went up to my father, whose
back was turned to him, and gave him a stout cuff: "Good evening, Hans,
can't you speak to your brother?"
My father started and turned round; Fritz stood fixed to the spot like
Lot's wife.
"Lord save us!" cried the Bailiff. "He comes in here and goes and
strikes the Stemhagen Burmeister under my own roof. And the rascal is
to be a bailiff some day!"
"Never mind," said my father. "However, as a punishment he shall have
no rest yet; he shall drive us over to Stemhagen this very night."
"Through the whole world, if you like, Herr Burmeister," said Fritz.
"But how is it you are so late home?" asked the Bailiff.
"Why, father, I thought it might be ugly if they were to catch me and
so I led the horses into the Wood, and stood on the watch; and I meant
to stay there till evening, but while I was waiting, Luth came along
and told me the French had been gone a long time, and that the
Burmeister had escaped from them and that he was looking for him.
"Where is Luth, now, then?" asked my father.
"He'll he here directly," said Fritz, "he only stopped to make
inquiries at the schoolmaster's."
Luth came in presently, and when he asked for my father and saw him in
the short jacket, he lost all control over himself, forgot everything
that he had meant to say, and burst out laughing.
My father got angry at this, for he was not thinking of the jacket
now, but of my Mother and all at home, and he caught Luth by the
collar:--"Luth, are you gone mad?" he cried; "What are my wife and
children doing?"
"They are quite well, Herr Burmeister--ha, ha, ha! And the Herr
Amtshauptmann is reading out of a book to the Frau Burmeister, and
Mamsell Westphalen is stuffing Fritz with buns and apples; but, ha, ha,
ha!--don't take it ill, Herr Burmeister; I can't help laughing."
Friedrich also began to laugh, and the Bailiff, and Fritz; and the
Bailiff's wife said: "The Herr Burmeister does look very funny!"--My
father's heart was light again now, so he could join in the laugh.
"You may laugh now, Luth," he said, "but make haste, for I have some
pressing business for you. The French took away the valise with the
gold and silver, did they not?"
"Yes, I saw it when they were dragging it off."
"Be quick then. You will find Inspector Braesig's brown mare in the
stable; take it and ride as fast as you can to Kittendorf to the Herr
Landrath von Uertzen--for it was there the Chasseurs came from
yesterday, and they no doubt got the silver spoons there;--and then
tell the Herr Landrath how things stand in Stemhagen, and ask him to
send a trusty man back with you who can swear to the spoons. By that
means he may, perhaps, be able to recover his property. And now, away
with you. And, Fritz, put the horses to, quickly."
They were all seated in the waggon in no time, except indeed the
Bailiff, for his wife would not let him go: "You have nothing to do
there; you can stop at home," she said.
"Wife" said the Bailiff, placing one foot on the wheel and the other on
the shaft, and looking down at her, "that's against our agreement; you
are mistress in the house and I am master in my bailiff's duties; and
to take charge of a prisoner is a bailiff's duty."
And so saying he squeezed himself in between Friedrich and the
Frenchman on one sack.
"Now Fritz," he cried, "off with you."