CHAPTER XII

GENUINE!

MRS. MACKENZIE had to sit down, absolutely panting under the blow,

and for once without words, as her husband gave a few particulars.

It appeared that the Landors' affairs had been for some years in an

involved condition, unknown to many of their most intimate friends.

Losses here and embarrassments there dated nearly, though not quite, so

far back as their marriage. The prosperous widow chosen by Mr. Landor

for his wife had been since by no means so prosperous as was commonly

supposed. But inasmuch as he had chosen her for herself, and not for

her money, this fact had had no power to touch their happiness.

They had hoped to emerge in the end from their difficulties. And in

the ordinary course of events, the hope might have been fulfilled. Now

however, at one blow, the main bulk of Mrs. Landor's possessions was

swept away by the collapse of the great Company in which most of her

money was embarked. An immediate sale of the estate was inevitable, and

the utmost that it could be expected to bring in would be swallowed up

by previously-existing liabilities.

"The extraordinary thing is that nobody should have expected anything

of the sort! No one seems to have so much as guessed what was coming.

If you had asked me about that Company, I could have declared that it

was almost as staunch as the Bank of England." Mr. Mackenzie looked

back to his own haunting fears, as partly expressed to Euphrasia,

about the bank with which he was himself closely connected, in a kind

of wonder. Clear vision had come suddenly, and he realised now the

futility, the needlessness, of his fears.

At this instant, the imaginations which had made him wretched for

months past looked absolutely absurd, the mere fruit of a disorganised

nervous system, with no positive foundation in fact. That which he had

so feared for himself, and for those dependent on him, had not come,

might never come. But the blow which none had foretold for the Landors

had fallen with startling abruptness. He woke out of a dream to the

sound of his wife's voice:—

"Do tell me! What are you thinking about? Do pray tell me. What will

they have to live on?"

"My dear, I fear almost nothing—beyond Mr. Landor's stipend."

"A stipend of eighty-five pounds a year!"

Mrs. Mackenzie burst into tears. She might be habitually a good deal

self-occupied, and not a little addicted to nursing her own troubles,

but she had a warm heart, and a very real affection for his long-tried

friend.

"She can't do it, Colin. At her age, and all her life accustomed to

have everything she could want. And he is getting elderly, and not

strong. It is perfectly dreadful! Of course, they have had some worries

now and then, everybody has, but nothing of this sort. Why, she has

always been able to get every single thing she wanted. And just think

of eighty-five pounds a year!"

"Yes, it's the suddenness of it—and the change from what she is used

to. That makes it so much worse."

"Worse! It makes it awful for them. How you can talk of it so quietly!

And what in the world are they to do now? This is what I cannot

imagine. Brought up as she has been. Eighty-five pounds a year. She

must be half dazed with it. Of course she does not see yet what it all

really means—she can't. And, oh dear, to think of what I have been

saying to her. How I could!"

Colin made a sound of enquiry.

"Oh, I don't know—I mean—Oh, of course I didn't know anything about

this; and she never told me. But it must have sounded so horribly

unfeeling. I told her about the doctor wanting you to get away, and she

said I ought to trust more. And I thought it was so easy for her to

talk when she had got everything she wanted, and I said something of

the sort. She won't be vexed, I know, because it is not her way, but I

am vexed with myself."

"Perhaps it is a little lesson just to be more careful next time, my

dear."

Mrs. Mackenzie rather resented having "little lessons" pointed out

to her, however clearly she might perceive them for herself. And she

hastened to explain that "another time" was very unlikely to recur.

In fact, one might think that this was the only time in her life that

she had ever been betrayed into hasty speech. But in the midst of her

defence, she relapsed into tears.

"Mrs. Landor wanted you to go and see her, Colin. Don't you think I

might go too, and tell her how sorry I am?"

"No, my dear. If Mrs. Landor asked for me only, she did not mean you

too. It is always best, when people are in trouble, to do exactly what

they ask, and not more. It may be that she wishes to put some business

questions," observed Colin, in his most oracular tone.

He had his way, and started alone, bearing a long message of unlimited

apology and sympathy, which went utterly out of his head by the time he

quitted the garden gate.

It was a trying visit to pay. He was a tenderhearted man, and could not

endure to look upon distress. And, judging from people generally, he

expected to find the Landors overwhelmed by the blow which had fallen

upon them, Mr. Landor in depths of despair, Mrs. Landor in floods

of tears. She had kept up, it was true, while calling on his wife,

doubtless for her sake, but that she should continue to keep up was

beyond the bounds of reasonable expectation. Colin wondered sorrowfully

what he should say to comfort them.

Of course Mrs. Landor would "trust." Both of them would of course

"trust." He felt no doubt on that head. He always asserted the fact

of his own "trust," no matter how dismally certain he might feel that

everything was going wrong, no matter how dolefully hopeless he might

be of any help arriving in time to tide him over rocks ahead. His idea

of trust was vague, and therefore was quite compatible with a general

hopelessness.

By the time he reached the Rectory, his face had grown portentously

long over the thought of his friends' grief. Rather oddly, this blow

to them had acted with a rousing force upon himself. He had not for

months felt so hopeful, so light-hearted about his own affairs. It was

almost as if he had foreseen that something would happen, and had only

been mistaken in supposing it to be a something concerning himself.

Probably a truer explanation would be that Colin Mackenzie, after

repeated attacks of severe influenza, coming upon long years of hard

work, had fallen into a dyspeptic and nervous condition of body, which

condition had reacted on the mind, rendering him unable to take a fair

and reasonable view of things in general, more especially of business

questions.

As Mrs. Landor had once said, molehills grew to mountains in his

eyes, and a usually unselfish nature had become for the time morbidly

self-centred—a state of things largely physical, but not on that

account altogether free from blame.

Wakened now by the shock of his friends' trouble, he looked back upon

his own past mental condition with a curious sense of surprise, almost

of disgust. What could have made him talk as he had done to Euphrasia,

the day before she left home? Absurd,—when really there had been no

sufficient cause, but only some needful business uncertainties, and

a desperate fit of the "blues," inclining him to see everything on

its darkest side. Dyspepsia, of course, as Dr. North had at the time

assured him. While Colin, because of that same dyspepsia, had counted

himself wiser than any number of doctors, and had refused to believe

the explanation. Now he knew better!

Poor little Eyebright! How she might have worried herself! Only of

course she had not, or she would have written oftener. No doubt she had

not grasped his full meaning. Still, he might have spoilt her visit

with his ill-considered remarks. He would write at once, this very

evening—cheerily, and in a different strain.

But then he would have to tell her about the Landors. She would

feel that down in the depth of her loving little heart, which Colin

knew to be really loving, though some might count her to be of a

cold disposition. No, he would not write yet. Better to wait, since

evidently she was not grieving. Mr. Mackenzie, like his wife, had been

somewhat hurt by Euphrasia's long silence, even while telling himself

that it meant nothing.

Then he reached the Rectory, and his courage was at a low ebb, though

not now for himself.

Floods of tears! States of despair! Not a whit! As he stood in the

hall, lugubrious with the weight of his pity, he heard the merriest

laugh, coming through the closed study door. That Mrs. Landor!

And a deeper-toned masculine laugh, no less cheerful. That the

poverty-stricken and despairing Rector! Colin could hardly believe his

own ears.

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Little Eyebright and her pund o' care · 第 12 / 16 章