Autumn this year is very disagreeable. It rains a great deal, and the
damp, foggy atmosphere has a bad effect on health, both in the city and
the country. I have had a great deal to do. Simon Eichelkatz was also
indisposed for several days. At his age every disturbance of the
physical state is serious. But Feiwel Silbermann is so touchingly
attentive that the care he bestows upon the old man quickly carries him
through his trouble. My medical instructions are obeyed by Feiwel so
punctually and accurately that I can be sure of their effect. We stuck
our patient into bed for a few days, but to-day he is sitting up, and
this afternoon I allowed him to smoke his pipe. That raised his spirits
immediately, and he became more talkative. A light veil of
sentimentality still lay on his soul, often the case with convalescents,
and he at last returned to the narrative of personal experiences. He
remembered a sickness he had had in 1867, late in the summer--a sort of
dysentery or _cholera nostras_, then epidemic. "The real illness lasted
only a few days, but afterwards," he said, "I was so weak, I couldn't
stir a finger. I remember it as though it happened to-day, how I sat
before the shop in the sun, to draw some warmth again into my bones.
They fairly rattled. I didn't have a Feiwel Silbermann to look after me
then."
"And your wife?" I asked.
"My wife wasn't at home. She was in Warmbrunn with our son, who was to
recuperate there. He had just passed his final examinations at the
Gymnasium. He passed them splendidly, Herr Kreisphysikus. They even
excused him from a part of his oral examinations. The whole city spoke
of it; and when Herr Professor Lebeck came in the afternoon to buy cloth
for a pair of trousers, he said to me: 'You may be proud of your son,
Herr Eichelkatz; he does credit to you and to our Gymnasium. It's been a
long time since we've had so gifted and industrious a pupil.' Lebeck's
red nose glistened as though he had come directly from Heimann to me. Of
course, I sold him the goods very cheap; and as he went out he repeated:
'Yes, your son, he'll be something extra some day.'"
Simon Eichelkatz looked down thoughtfully, then he blew a thick cloud of
tobacco smoke into the air and added:
"Fortunately, it passed quickly; only the after-part, until I got back
my full strength--but still it wasn't necessary to disturb my wife in
her holiday, and my son. At first Herr Doktor Merzbach wanted to write
to her; but when I explained to him why I didn't want him to, he gave
up the idea. Why? Herr Kreisphysikus! Madame Eichelkatz would probably
have come back, if news of my illness had been sent to her; but she
wouldn't have brought love into my house, and no good will, and no
devotion, just what a weak, sick man needs. On that account I preferred
not to have her here, but to let her amuse herself there with her
company. It had just then come into style to go away in the summer; and
this was the first time Madame Eichelkatz, _nee_ Boehm, had followed the
fashion. And there she met her good friends. I told this to the Herr
Rabbiner, and he thought the matter over and asked: 'Can nothing be
done, Eichelkatz, to bring peace into your married life? Now that your
son is grown up and ready to go to the university?' I felt as though the
Herr Rabbiner were reproaching me. And then for the first and last time
I opened out my heart freely. Perhaps because I was so weak and alone. I
told him what vexations and humiliations I had endured for twenty
years. And always carrying the trouble in secret, so as not to give
offense and for the sake of the child. He was not to see how matters
stood with us, and besides he was greatly attached to her and loved her
tenderly, for she had taken him entirely to herself. I ask you who was
Simon Eichelkatz of Tarnow? At most a decent, industrious fellow, who,
however, didn't trust himself to say what he thought. It was the custom,
you know, in Jewish homes for the women to concern themselves with the
house and with the bringing up of the children, and for the men to earn
a living. But there was perfect understanding between husband and wife,
real harmony; and the mother taught the children that the father, who
looked out for them and worked for them, was the centre of the
household. This was utterly lacking with Madame and myself. I always
remained a stranger to both mother and child. She chose his companions
from among the Christians with whom she associated, and she estranged
him from Jewish ways exactly as she had estranged him from his father.
She kept up the necessary appearances before the outside world; but
within our home it looked very bad. The boy was not put on a sure, sound
basis for the future. I know it now, Herr Kreisphysikus. Earlier in life
I could not see things so clearly. But when Dr. Merzbach came to me that
time, I realized all; and I told him everything, even that it was too
late to change matters, since my son was almost nineteen years old and
would leave home. Dr. Merzbach recognized the truth of what I said,
because he didn't say anything in reply. Then I went on and said:
'Believe me, Herr Rabbiner, if two human beings are yoked together and
do not go in exactly the same way, hand in hand, but one pulls to the
left, the other to the right, they cannot reach a common goal. For that
matter they have no common goal.' The Herr Rabbiner shook his head and
asked: 'How about your son's future?'
"'Each of us will probably wish for a different future,' I answered. And
that's the way it was, Herr Kreisphysikus. What _she_ wished came to
pass. Her son became a very renowned man. She didn't live to see his
greatness, and I who did, I hadn't longed for it."
He paused, as though revolving his words in his mind and added:
"You mustn't misunderstand me, Herr Kreisphysikus. But what has our
personal happiness to do with external success? What can one ever
receive from others that does not exist in oneself? Hasn't every
happiness a different form? Hasn't every happiness a different name?
Honor is happiness to one man, wealth to another, beauty to a third,
fame to a fourth. Hasn't happiness a thousand names and forms? And have
you ever seen two beings who call the same thing happiness? There may
be a few things that are looked on as happiness--contentment, health,
fulfilment of duty, wealth--but, my dear Herr Kreisphysikus, that only
sounds nice--it may be a part, but it is not the whole. That which all
men wish to possess is not the happiness that each individual imagines
for himself; because it depends upon the nature of each individual; and
there are as many happinesses as there have been men since the creation
of the world. Or, if you wish it, Herr Kreisphysikus, there is no such
thing as happiness at all. Because, if you can't see a thing and say, it
is thus and so, does it exist? I can say, this is an apple, this is a
potato, this is my pipe; but I can't say, this is happiness. How does it
look? Round or long, wide or narrow? I must laugh when I think that
Madame Eichelkatz, _nee_ Boehm, and Simon Eichelkatz should have said,
that is our happiness, that's the way it looks, that's the way it should
look."
He waved his hand.
"I know all; I know what you want to say, Herr Kreisphysikus, and what
Herr Dr. Merzbach also said that time. Our son! Do you know the sort of
picture Madame Eichelkatz drew for herself of her son? Great and
renowned in the large outside world, so renowned that Herr
Oberstleutnant Von Boddin and Frau Steuereinnehmer Antonie Metzner, her
bosom friend, would open their eyes in astonishment. That's the way
_her_ happiness would have looked. She was ambitious and proud and knew
French. And do you know how my son looked in my dreams? A good, fine
man, an honest Jew, who would conduct my business. I was simple and
industrious, and I knew all about cloth. So you may believe me, Herr
Kreisphysikus, a Madame who speaks French, and a Jew who can tell at a
glance without touching it whether a piece of cloth comes from Cottbus
or England, two people like that have very different ideas of
happiness!"
I followed his words with increasing astonishment. How do such ideas
regarding individuality and such clearly-defined notions of eudaemonism
arise in the brain of this old man living remote from the world? Whence
this wisdom? While these questions agitated my mind, he continued:
"On that afternoon when I sat in the sun in front of my shop, I began to
ponder about these things; and since then I have accustomed myself to
reflect about this and that by myself; because I hadn't a single friend
with whom I could talk myself out. But, do you know, Herr Doktor, I
think it is better to be alone if one wants to think. And Dr. Merzbach
passed by and saw me sitting there alone; and, while he was talking to
me, Rittmeister Von Bluecher and Major Von Schmidt cut diagonally across
the Ring to come up to us. Both stepped up and greeted the rabbi, who
enjoyed great consideration among the Christians.
"'How do you do, Herr Doktor,' the Rittmeister called out and laughed:
'Do you know the news? To-morrow I shall have the Jew Haberstroh shot;
he was delivered up to us from Oswiecin as a spy. He's said to have
served in the Austrian army near Neuberun.'
"Dr. Merzbach answered quietly:
"'Since you laugh over it, I'm not worried, Herr Rittmeister. I
understand your joke. You would not laugh if a human life were actually
at stake. At all events, it's really a sad story that just this good,
decent old man should be falsely suspected and delivered up.'
"'Well, what shall we do with the fellow, Herr Doktor? According to
military law, he ought to have been dead long ago. Ask the major if I'm
not right.'
"'I don't doubt the truth of your words, Herr Rittmeister; but I also
know that both you gentlemen would not have a poor innocent man put to
death on an unproved accusation. I pledge myself for Haberstroh's
innocence.'
"'Tut, tut tut, Herr Doktor, will you be answerable for the
consequences?'
"With these words they left the rabbi, laughing, and Haberstroh was not
shot to death. After a few days it turned out that he had been arrested
on the spiteful charge of a business rival. Dr. Merzbach had gathered
the proofs and handed them over to the Rittmeister. He himself had gone
to Oswiecin for this purpose. That's the way he always threw himself
into affairs, and helped with all his energy."
I was just about to put a question to Simon Eichelkatz about the spy,
when he suddenly said:
"Do you believe, Herr Kreisphysikus, that to be good and noble and help
your fellow-beings is happiness?"
"Have you ever read anything by Goethe or heard of him?" I returned,
evading the question.
"No, Herr Doktor, I never read anything by him, but I've heard of him."
"Goethe says: 'Let man be noble, helpful, and good.' Do you suppose by
these words he wanted to show men the road to happiness, Herr
Eichelkatz?"
"Who can tell?"