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"Uv all de creeturs", said Uncle Remus, in response to a questioning
took on the part of the little boy, "ol Brer B'ar had de biggest an' de
warmest house. I dunner why ner wharfo', but I'm a-tellin' you de plain
fack, des ez dey to!' it unter me. Ef I kin he'p it I never will be
deceivin' you, ner lead you inter no bad habits. Yo' pappy trotted wid
me a mighty long time, an' ef you'll ax him he'll tell you dat de one
thing I never did do wuz ter deceive him whiles he had his eyes open;
not ef I knows myse'f. Well, ol' Brer B'ar had de big house I'm
a-tellin' you about. Ef he y'ever is brag un it, it aint never come down
ter me. Yit dat's des what he had--a big house an' plenty er room fer
him an' his fambly; an' he aint had mo' dan he need, kaze all er his
fambly wuz fat an' had what folks calls heft--de nachal plunkness.
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"He had a son name Simmon, an' a gal name Sue, not countin' his ol'
'oman, an' dey all live wid one an'er day atter day, an' night atter
night; an' when one un um went abroad, dey'd be spected home 'bout
meal-time, ef not befo', an' dey segashuated right along fum day ter
day, washin' der face an' han's in de same wash-pan in de back po'ch,
an' wipin' on de same towel same ez all happy famblies allers does.
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"Well, time went on an' fotched de changes dat might be spected, an' one
day dar come a mighty knockin' on Brer B'ar's do'. Brer B'ar, he holla
out, he did. 'Who dat come a-knockin' dis time er de year, 'fo' de
corn's done planted, er de cotton-crap's pitched?' De one at de do' make
a big noise, an' rattle de hinges. Brer B'ar holla out, he did, 'Don't
t'ar down my house! Who is you, anyhow, an' what you want?' An' de
answer come, 'I'm one an' darfo' not two; ef youer mo' dan one, who is
you an' what you doin' in dar?' Brer B'ar, he say, sezee, 'I'm all er
one an' mighty nigh two, but I'd thank you fer ter tell me yo' full
fambly name.' Den de answer come.
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"'I'm de knocker an' de mover bofe, an' ef I can't clim' over I'll crawl
under ef you do but gi' me de word. Some calls me Brer Polecat, an' some
a big word dat it aint wuff while ter ermember, but I wanter move in.
It's mighty col' out here, an' all I meets tells me it's mighty warm in
dar whar you is.' Den ol' Brer B'ar say, sezee. 'It's warm nuff fer dem
what stays in here, but not nigh so warm fer dem on de outside. What
does you reely want?' Brer Polecat 'spon', he did, 'I wants a heap er
things dat I don't git. I'm a mighty good housekeeper, but I takes
notice dat dar's mighty few folks dat wants me ter keep house fer um.'
Brer B'ar say, sezee, 'I aint got no room fer no housekeeper; we aint
skacely got room fer ter go ter bed. Ef you kin keep my house on de
outside, you er mighty welcome.'
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"Brer Polecat say, 'You may think you aint got no room, but I bet you
got des ez much room ez anybody what I know. Ef you let me in dar one
time, I boun' you I'll make all de room I want.'"
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Uncle Remus paused to see what effect this statement would have on the
little boy. He closed his eyes, as though he were tired, but when he
opened them again, he saw the faint shadow of a smile on the child's
face. "'Taint gwine ter hurt you fer ter laugh a little bit, honey. Brer
Polecat come in Brer B'ar's house, an' he had sech a bad breff dat dey
all hatter git out--an' he stayed an' stayed twel time stopped runnin'
ag'in' him."