_Mon., 7 days out._ Raining yet, very hard--A few sinners still on
deck; a bunch got washed off last night; kinder sorry for them--Ham
will get a rope's-end if he don't look out; he skylarks too much with
the animals; put all the dogs in the cats' cage last night, and the
whole menagerie got excited at the row they made; couldn't hear
ourselves think for two hours; every brute in the outfit sung his
song--Roof leaks--Women say it's washday and have started in on the
week's wash; just like women; how'll they dry clothes this weather?
Course E. B. S. Ham at the wheel, Shem on the lookout.
_Tues., 8 days out. 4 bells._ Women are growling because the sun don't
shine so the wash can dry; told them such murmuring as they indulged in
was flying straight in the face of Providence; told me to mind my own
business; remarked that I was captain here and wouldn't take back talk
from anyone; hove a bucket of water over me, durn them. _6 bells_. Got
my log line strung up along 'tween decks and the whole blamed wash
triced up in everybody's way. If I want to heave the log at 8 bells,
overboard goes the wash, and don't care who likes it; I'm boss here. _8
bells_. Didn't heave the log--Guess we're making four knots; wind
fresh.
Course E. S. E. Shem at the wheel, Japheth on the lookout.
_Wed., 9 days out._ Ironing day; blowing a gale of wind; women are
making hard work of it and getting seasick--Hove to at 8 bells this
morning; lays easy; kicked Ham away from the wheel and steered his
trick; afraid I can't make a sailor of him; wish I'd saved a few
sinners to work ship; could have drowned them afterwards.
Heading N. E. by N. Japheth at the wheel.
_Thurs., 10 days out._ Wish I knew who drinks my whiskey--Made sail at
daylight; difficult work, this handling sail below decks; can't see
aloft, must feel when sheets are home; don't like these new fangled
rolling topsails that furl themselves; they're not shipshape, but we're
too short-handed for the old style--Wind going down.
Course due E. Shem at the wheel, Ham on the lookout.
_Fri., 11 days out._ Foggy; can't see two lengths; two of us on the
lookout--Ham is under the scuttlebutt, drunk; whiskey lower; slight
connection here, maybe--Women are quarreling among themselves; they're
a heap of trouble; never quiet till they're seasick; found out they get
seasick in a head sea; will remember this--The lion got out last night
and made a lunch out of my wife's pet dog Beauty; chased him back to
his cage with a handspike; sorry I had to hurt him; seven pugs left
now; we started with a pair to each woman.
No wind and nobody at the wheel.
_Sat., 12 days out._ Wish it would clear up; sinners must be all dead
by this time--Have had a hard day of it; that boy Ham let go the port
anchor, and the whole range of chain, 45 fathoms, went out the
hawse-pipe and fetched up with a jerk that carried away the windlass
bitts and nearly tore the bows off her; kicked him up on deck in the
rain while we mended the windlass; hunted him up to help heave in chain
and found he'd sneaked down, got at my jug, and was dead drunk
alongside the same; don't see what the Lord wanted to save him
for--Must be clear of soundings now, so will keep her hove to for a
while under short sail, with the wheel lashed down.
_Sun., 13 days out._ Held religious exercises at 4 bells; Ham attended,
very devout and penitent, with a head as big as the jug--Women have
tricked themselves out and are mincing around showing off; made me put
on a white shirt; will get rid of it directly--Dead calm all day--Found
the ark had a slight list to starboard; investigated, and discovered
about three tons of stones, dead cats, and garbage stuck fast to the
pitch outside; these things are what the sinners threw at the ark after
we came aboard--Have locked up my whiskey.
_Wed., 16 days out._ Made a great mistake when we started; was puzzled
how to feed the spiders, mosquitoes, bedbugs, and such; turned them
loose to hustle for themselves, and that's what they've done ever
since--Another pug disappeared last night; six left; gave Ham a talking
to about getting drunk; was sassy and I boxed his ears; told him if I
ever saw him drunk again aboard my ship I'd log him; he don't seem to
care, but that's what I'll do every time--Still hove to.
_Sun., 20 days out._ Ham broke into my locker last night, and is
roaring drunk again; can't find the jug; will log him every time
now--No religious exercises to-day; women are complaining of my
impiety, but a man can't feel resigned when he has just lost a
four-gallon jug of the best Egyptian corn whiskey.
_Mon., 21 days out._ Ham's drunk.
_Tues., 22 days out._ Ditto's ditto.
_Wed., 23 days out._ Do. do.
_Thurs., 24 days out._ Do. blind do.
_Fri., 25 days out._ Do. dead do.
_Sat., 26 days out._ Do. got snakes; got 'em bad; wish I could
find that jug.
_Sun., 27 days out._ Two more pugs missing; must keep away from the
lion's cage when the women are around; he seems too pleased to see me,
and they are getting suspicious; four of the ugly brutes left
now--found my jug; Ham stowed it in my own bunk; he's smarter than I
thought--Had religious exercises; women wanted to mourn for their pugs;
am willing they should mourn--Took a cast of the lead at noon; thirty
fathoms, mud bottom; made sail and squared away due E.
_Mon., 28 days out._ My wife has confiscated the jug and means to keep
it; we'll see about that; says it is the cause of poor, dear Ham's
sickness; undoubtedly; should have let it alone--Shem at the wheel,
Japheth on the lookout.
Course E.
_Wed., 30 days out._ Mutiny! Bloody Mut---- d----n! ----!! (Note--Here
the manuscript bears evidence that Captain Noah was suddenly
interrupted while writing.--Translator.)
_Fri., 32 days out._ Have had a lively time; discipline is restored,
but the whiskey jug is gone--smashed over my head--all on account of
the pugs; had hoped to rid the world of these parodies on the canine
race, and would have succeeded if my wife hadn't overhauled my pockets
when I was asleep and read this log. Certain references to the pugs put
her on the lookout and she and the other women watched me; one of the
brutes littered that night; I couldn't resist the temptation, and so
fed the whole batch, mother and all, to the lion; in a minute had four
furious women afoul of me, biting and clawing; sung out for help, and
Shem and Japheth bore down and rescued me; Ham helped the women and
made a majority for them; his mother had the jug, that's why; managed
to floor him with a pump-brake, but they were still too many for us and
chased us around decks till they got tired and sat down to cry; got to
my room and began writing them down in the log when they started in
again; my wife smashed the whiskey jug over my head--then we all
escaped on deck and went aloft; couldn't follow us, but sat down and
said things--Had a council of war, then Shem shinned over to the
foremast and cut away all the jib halliards and sheets and halliards on
the fore--Ark had broached to in trough sea when Japheth left the wheel
to help me, and had laid there with yards square and rolling
considerable; women could stand that motion, but not a head sea, so now
when she came up to the wind and began pounding up and down and
drifting astern, they got qualmish and in twenty minutes were sprawled
out helpless; Ham didn't know enough to take the wheel and throw her
off, so we came down, tied the women hand and foot, and then went for
Ham; triced him up and rope's-ended him till his nose bled; begged and
howled, but had to take it and learn that mutiny is unsafe aboard my
ship--Kept her head to the sea till we had spliced and rove off the
gear, then set canvas and squared away again--Women got better; read
the articles to them; were penitent and promised to behave, but before
turning them loose we went on a pug hunt and passed two of them in to
the lion; only one left now, but we haven't found it yet; women howled
a good deal and called us heartless, cruel fiends--that's all right.
My wife had lost the log-book in her excitement, and I only found it
to-day.
Course N. E. by E. Shem at the wheel. Jap. on the lookout.
_Sun., 34 days out._ No religious services to-day; women are talking
about me--don't talk _to_ me; if they do, I'll speak of that jug.
Course due E. Blowing fresh. J. at the wheel, S. on lookout.
_Mon., 35 days out._ Wash day, but there is no washing going on; won't
have it; am captain here; they were ugly at first, but I hauled her on
a wind and said nothing; can't find that pug--Keep Ham at work on the
menagerie now, feeding the animals and cleaning the cages--Dead calm.
_Wed., 37 days out._ Nothing new; pug still missing; good mind to turn
the lion loose; he'll find the cur.
_Fri., 39 days out._ If I don't find that pug to-day, will let the lion
out first thing to-morrow.
_Sat., 40 days out._ Stopped raining--We all went on deck this morning;
it was a frightful picture--sun shining, not a cloud in the sky and not
a sign of land nor ship, nor even a bird, in all this expanse of
desolation; no life nor joyousness, nothing but muddy water; the dead
world fathoms underneath, and we alone, with our ark, all that was
left; and whiskey gone--not a shot in the locker.
At noon locked up the women and turned the lion loose; he didn't find
the pug, but found most everything else; smashed some bird cages and a
raven and dove got away; dove came back at sundown, but the raven
didn't; let all the birds out to get the air and roost up aloft.
_Sat., 47 days out._ Chicken missing this morning; suspect Ham of
stealing it--A pigeon fluttered down on deck with a green leaf fast in
its gullet and half choked; pulled leaf out; pigeon must have been
somewhere else and got it; will keep to the eastward and look out for
land.
_Tues., 50 days out._ Blowing great guns, and dismasted; under double
reefs, storm spanker, and foretopmast staysail at daylight; blew away
the staysail; set jib; that went too and took jibboom; cut away the
wreck; she came up to the wind, caught aback, and away went the
mizzenmast at the deck; cut that away, paid off in the trough of the
sea, and rolled the fore and mainmast out; cleared away everything,
rigged out a sea anchor, and now were riding it out comfortable--that
is, for us; women are all sick.
Land to the eastward, small island.
_60 days out._ Land still in sight; gets bigger; suppose the water is
going down; nothing to do now but eat, sleep, and hunt for that
pug--Still riding at the sea anchor.
_100 days out._ Pug must be dead--More land showing up.
_150 days out. Noon_--Driving on a lee shore stern foremost; getting
anchors ready; _sundown_--let go both anchors as we got close in;
dragged, and here we are, with every sea making a clean sweep over us;
ark won't last long; getting out liferaft and turning animals loose.
_Next morning._ Floated ashore all right; ark is breaking up and
animals swimming in; last to come were that missing pug and seven
half-grown pups; submit to the will of Providence, but still think
women had the durned brute hid in the lower hold.
_Next day._ Poor place to live on this island--Nothing grown, but a
grapevine I found on the beach; will take care of it; it means grapes,
and grapes mean juice, and it's been a long time between drinks--Ham is
quite useful now; takes a deep interest in the vine and helps me 'tend
it.
_Month later._ Grapevine is doing well.
_Four months later._ Grapes appearing.
_Two months later._ Picked the grapes; now for some wine--Ham is a
model boy; did him good to rope's-end him.
_Five months later._ Wine has worked; will serve grog to-morrow and
celebrate the anniversary of our shipwreck.
_Next day._ (The manuscript of this last day's entry is obscure, and so
incoherent, as to make it strongly probable that Captain Noah served
the grog as indicated, and that he wrote while under the influence of
the same. There are, however, some legible references to certain "pugs"
which would go to show that he still had those animals in mind and
perhaps regretted his failure to effect their extinction.--Translator.)