VI

The flowered cottage on the road to Tinnick stood in the midst of trees,

on a knoll some few feet above the roadway, and Father Oliver, when he

was a boy, often walked out by himself from Tinnick to see the

hollyhocks and the sunflowers; they overtopped the palings, the

sunflowers looking like saucy country girls and the hollyhocks like

grand ladies, delicate and refined, in pink muslin dresses. He used to

stand by the gate looking into the garden, delighted by its luxuriance,

for there were clumps of sweet pea and beds of red carnations and roses

everywhere, and he always remembered the violets and pansies he saw

before he went away to Maynooth. He never remembered seeing the garden

in bloom again. He was seven years at Maynooth, and when he came home

for his vacations it was too late or too early in the season. He was

interested in other things; and during his curacy at Kilronan he rarely

went to Tinnick, and when he did, he took the other road, so that he

might see Father Peter.

He was practically certain that the last time he saw the garden in bloom

was just before he went to Maynooth. However this might be, it was

certain he would never see it in bloom again. Mary had left the cottage

a ruin, and it was sad to think of the clean thick thatch and the

whitewashed walls covered with creeper and China roses, for now the

thatch was black and mouldy; and of all the flowers only a few stocks

survived; the rose-trees were gone--the rabbits had eaten them. Weeds

overtopped the currant and gooseberry bushes; here and there was a trace

of box edging. 'But soon,' he said, 'all traces will be gone, the roof

will fall in, and the garden will become part of the waste.' His eyes

roved over the country into which he was going--almost a waste; a meagre

black soil, with here and there a thorn-bush and a peasant's cabin.

Father Oliver knew every potato field and every wood, and he waited for

the elms that lined the roadway a mile ahead of him, a long, pleasant

avenue that he knew well, showing above the high wall that encircled a

nobleman's domain. Somewhere in the middle of that park was a great

white house with pillars, and the story he had heard from his mother,

and that roused his childish imaginations, was that Lord Carra was hated

by the town of Tinnick, for he cared nothing for Ireland and was said to

be a man of loose living, in love with his friend's wife, who came to

Tinnick for visits, sometimes with, sometimes without, her husband. It

may have been his Lordship's absenteeism, as well as the scandal the

lady gave, that had prompted a priest to speak against Lord Carra from

the altar, if not directly, indirectly. 'Both are among the gone,'

Father Oliver said to himself. 'No one speaks of them now; myself hasn't

given them a thought this many a year--' His memories broke off

suddenly, for a tree had fallen, carrying a large portion of the wall

with it, but without revealing the house, only a wooded prospect through

which a river glided. 'The Lord's mistress must have walked many a time

by the banks of that river,' he said. But why was he thinking of her

again? Was it the ugly cottage that put thoughts of her into his mind?

for she had done nothing to alleviate the lives of the poor, who lived

without cleanliness and without light, like animals in a den. Or did his

thoughts run on that woman, whom he had never seen, because Tinnick was

against her and the priest had spoken slightingly of the friends that

Lord Carra brought from England? The cause of his thoughts might be that

he was going to offer Nora Glynn to his sister as music-mistress. But

what connection between Nora Glynn and this dead woman? None. But he was

going to propose Nora Glynn to Eliza, and the best line of argument

would be that Nora would cost less than anyone as highly qualified as

she. Nuns were always anxious to get things cheap, but he must not let

them get Nora too cheap. But the question of price wouldn't arise

between him and Eliza. Eliza would see that the wrong he did to Nora was

preying on his conscience, and that he'd never be happy until he had

made atonement--that was the light in which she would view the matter,

so it would be better to let things take their natural course and to

avoid making plans. The more he thought of what he should say to Eliza,

the less likely was he to speak effectively; and feeling that he had

better rely on the inspiration of the moment, he sought distraction from

his errand by noting the beauty of the hillside. He had always liked

the way the road dipped and then ascended steeply to the principal

street in the town. There were some pretty houses in the dip--houses

with narrow doorways and long windows, built, no doubt, in the beginning

of the nineteenth century--and his ambition was once to live in one of

these houses.

The bridge was an eighteenth-century bridge, with a foaming weir on the

left, and on the right there was a sentimental walk under linden-trees,

and there were usually some boys seated on the parapet fishing. He would

have liked to stop the car, so remote did the ruined mills seem--so like

things of long ago that time had mercifully weaned from the stress and

struggle of life.

At the corner of the main street was the house in which he was born. The

business had passed into other hands, but the old name--'Gogarty's

Drapery Stores'--remained. Across the way were the butcher and the

grocer, and a little higher up the inn at which the commercial

travellers lodged. He recalled their numerous leather trunks, and for a

moment stood a child again, seeing them drive away on post-cars. A few

more shops had been added--very few--and then the town dwindled quickly,

slated roofs giving way to thatched cottages, and of the same miserable

kind that was wont to provoke his antipathy when he was a boy.

This sinful dislike of poverty he overcame in early manhood. A high

religious enthusiasm enabled him to overcome it, but his instinctive

dislike of the lowly life--intellectual lowliness as well as

physical--gathered within these cottages, seemed to have returned again.

He asked himself if he were wanting in natural compassion, and if all

that he had of goodness in him were a debt he owed to the Church. It was

in patience rather than in pity maybe that he was lacking; and pursuing

this idea, he recalled the hopes he entertained when he railed off a

strip of ground in front of Bridget Clery's house. But that strip of

garden had inspired no spirit of emulation. Eliza was perhaps more

patient than he, and he began to wonder if she had any definite aim in

view, and if the spectacle of the convent, with its show of nuns walking

under the trees, would eventually awaken some desire of refinement in

the people, if the money their farms now yielded would produce some sort

of improvement in their cottages, the removal of those dreadfully heavy

smells, and a longing for colour that would find expression in the

planting of flowers.

They gave their money willingly enough for the adornment of their

chapel, for stained glass, incense, candles, and for music, and were it

not for the services of the Church he didn't know into what barbarism

the people mightn't have fallen: the tones of the organ sustaining clear

voices of nuns singing a Mass by Mozart must sooner or later inspire

belief in the friendliness of pure air and the beauty of flowers.

Flowers are the only beautiful things within the reach of these poor

people. Roses all may have, and it was pleasant to think that there is

nothing more entirely natural or charming in the life of man than his

love of flowers: it preceded his love of music; no doubt an appreciation

of something better in the way of art than a jig played on the pipes

would follow close on the purification of the home.

Nora Glynn was beautiful, and her personality was winning and charming,

her playing delightful, and her singing might have inspired the people

to cultivate beauty. But she was going to the convent. The convent had

gotten her. It was a pity. Mrs. O'Mara's scandalous stories, insinuating

lies, had angered him till he could bear with her no longer, and he had

put her out the door. He didn't believe that Eliza had ever said she

could give Nora more than she was earning in Garranard. It mattered very

little if she had, for it had so fallen out that she was going to get

her. He begrudged them Nora. But Eliza was going to get her, and he'd

have to make the best terms he could.

But he could not constrain his thoughts to the present moment. They

would go back to the fateful afternoon when he ran across the fields to

ask Nora if what Mrs. O'Mara had said of her were true. If he had only

waited! If she had come to him to confession on Saturday, as he expected

she would! If something had prevented him from preaching on Sunday! A

bad cold might have prevented him from speaking, and she might have gone

away for a while, and, when her baby was born, she might have come back.

It could have been easily arranged. But fate had ordered her life

otherwise, and here he was in the Tinnick Convent, hoping to make her

some poor amends for the wrong he had done her. Would Eliza help

him?--that was the question he asked himself as he crossed the

beeswaxed floor and stood looking at the late afternoon sunlight

glancing through the trees, falling across the green sward.

'How do you do, Oliver?'

His face lighted up, but it changed expression and became gray again. He

had expected to see Eliza, tall and thin, with yellow eyebrows and pale

eyes. Hers was a good, clearly-cut face, like his own, whereas Mary's

was quite different. Yet a family likeness stared through Mary's heavy

white face. Her eyes were smaller than his, and she already began to

raise them and lower them, and to look at him askance, in just the way

he hated. Somehow or other she always contrived to make him feel

uncomfortable, and the present occasion was no exception. She was

already reproving him, hoping he was not disappointed at seeing her, and

he had to explain that he expected to see Eliza, and that was why he

looked surprised. She must not confuse surprise with disappointment. He

was very glad to see her.

'I know I am not as interesting as Eliza,' she began, 'but I thought you

might like to see me, and if I hadn't come at once I shouldn't have had

an opportunity of seeing you alone.'

'She has something to confide,' Father Oliver said to himself, and he

hoped that her confidences might be cut short by the timely arrival of

Eliza.

'Eliza is engaged at present. She told Sister Agatha to tell you that

she would be with you presently. I met Sister Agatha in the passage, and

said I would take the message myself. I suppose I oughtn't to have done

so, but if I hadn't I shouldn't have had an opportunity of speaking with

you.'

'Why is that?'

'I don't think she likes me to see you alone.'

'My dear Mary!'

'You don't know, Oliver, what it is to live in a convent, and your own

sister the head of it.'

'I should have thought, Mary, that it was especially pleasant, and that

you were especially fortunate. And as for thinking that Eliza is not

wishing you to see me alone, I am sure--'

'You are sure I'm mistaken.'

'What reason could she have?'

'Eliza doesn't wish the affairs of the convent discussed. You know, I

suppose, that the building of the new wing has put a burden of debt on

the convent.'

'I know that; so why should Eliza--'

'Eliza tries to prevent my seeing any of the visitors. Now, do you think

that quite right and fair towards one's sister?'

Father Oliver tried to prevent himself from smiling, but he sympathized

so entirely with Eliza's efforts to prevent Mary from discussing the

affairs of the convent that he could hardly keep down the smile that

rose to his lips. He could see Eliza's annoyance on coming into the

parlour and finding Mary detailing all the gossip and confiding her own

special woes, for the most part imaginary, to a visitor. Nor would Mary

refrain from touching on the Reverend Mother's shortcomings. He was so

much amused that he might have smiled if it had not suddenly come to his

mind that Mary might leave the convent and insist on living with him;

and a little scared he began to think of what he could say to pacify

her, remembering in the midst of his confusion and embarrassment that

Mary was professed last year, and therefore could not leave the convent;

and this knowledge filled him with such joy that he could not keep back

the words, but must remind his sister that she had had ample opportunity

of considering if she were suited to the religious life.

'You see, Mary, you should have thought of all this before you were

professed.'

'I shan't take my final vows till next year.'

'But, my dear Mary, once a woman has taken the black veil ... it is the

same thing, you know.'

'Not quite, otherwise there would be no meaning in the delay.'

'You don't mean to say that you're thinking of leaving the convent,

Mary?'

'Not exactly, but it is very hard on me, Oliver. I was thinking of

writing to you, but I hoped that you would come to see us. You have been

a long time now without coming.'

'Well, Mary--'

'Eliza loves ruling everybody, and just because I am her sister she is

harder on me than anyone else. Only the other day she was furious with

me because I stopped at confession a few minutes longer than usual. "I

think," she said, "you might spare Father Higgins your silly scruples."

Now, how is one to stop in a convent if one's own sister interferes in

one's confessions?'

'Well, Mary, what are you thinking of doing?'

'There are some French nuns who have just come over and want to open a

school, and are looking for Irish subjects. I was thinking they'd like

to have me. You see, I wouldn't have to go through the novitiate again,

for they want an experienced person to teach them English and to mind

the school for them. It is really a mistake to be under one's own

sister.'

At that moment the door opened and Eliza came in, apologizing for having

kept her brother so long waiting.

'You see, my dear Oliver, I've had two mothers here this morning, and

you know what parents are. I suppose Mary has told you about our

difficulties. Now, do you mean to say that you have found a person who

will suit us?... It is really very kind of you.'

'I can't say for certain, Eliza. Of course, it is difficult for me to

know exactly what you want, but, so far as I know, I think the person I

have in my mind will suit you.'

'But has she a diploma from the Academy? We must have a certificate.'

'I think she'll suit you, but we'll talk about her presently. Don't you

think we might go into the garden?'

'Yes, it will be pleasanter in the garden. And you, Mary--you've had

your little chat with Oliver.'

'I was just going, Eliza. If I'd known that Oliver wanted to speak

privately to you, I'd have gone sooner.'

'No, no, I assure you, Mary.'

Mary held out her hand to her brother, saying:

'I suppose I shall not see you again, unless, perhaps, you're stopping

the night with Father Higgins. It would be nice if you could do that.

You could say Mass for us in the morning.'

Father Oliver shook his head.

'I'm afraid I must get back to-night.'

'Well, then, good-bye.' And Mary went out of the room regretfully, like

one who knows that the moment her back is turned all her faults will

become the subject of conversation.

'I hear from Mary that some French nuns are coming over, and want to

open a school. I hope that won't interfere with yours, Eliza; you spent

a great deal of money upon the new wing.'

'It will interfere very much indeed; but I'm trying to get some of the

nuns to come here, and I hope the Bishop will not permit a new

foundation. It's very hard upon us Irish women if we are to be eaten out

of house and home by pious foreigners. I'm in correspondence with the

Bishop about it. As for Mary--'

'You surely don't think she's going to leave?'

'No, I don't suppose she'll leave; it would be easier for me if she did,

but it would give rise to any amount of talk. And where would she go if

she did leave, unless she lived with you?'

'My house is too small; besides, she didn't speak of leaving, only that

she hadn't yet taken her final vows. I explained that no one will

distinguish between the black veil and final vows. Am I not right?'

'I think those vows will take a great weight off your mind, Oliver. I

wish I could say as much for myself.'

The Reverend Mother opened a glass door, and brother and sister stood

for some time admiring the flower vases that lined the terrace.

'I can't get her to water the geraniums.'

'If you'll tell me where I can get a can--'

'You'll excuse me, Reverend Mother.'

It was the Sister in charge of the laundry, and, seeing her crippled

arm, Father Oliver remembered that her dress had become entangled in the

machinery. He didn't know, however, that the fault lay with Mary, who

was told off to watch the machinery and to stop it instantly in case of

necessity.

'She can't keep her attention fixed on anything, not even on her

prayers, and what she calls piety I should call idleness. It's terrible

to have to do with stupid women, and the convent is so full of them that

I often wonder what is the good of having a convent at all.'

'But, Eliza, you don't regret--'

'No, of course I don't regret. I should do just the same again. But

don't let us waste our time talking about vocations. I hear enough of

that here. I want you to tell me about the music-mistress; that's what

interests me.'

And when Father Oliver had told her the whole story and showed her

Father O'Grady's letter, she said:

'You know I always thought you were a little hard on Miss Glynn. Father

O'Grady's letter convinces me that you were.'

'My dear Eliza, I don't want advice; I've suffered enough.'

'Oliver dear, forgive me.' And the nun put out her hand to detain him.

'Well, don't say again, Eliza, that you always thought. It's irritating,

and it does no good.'

'Her story is known, but she could live in the convent; that would

shelter her from any sort of criticism. I don't see why she shouldn't

take the habit of one of the postulants, but--'

The priest waited for his sister to speak, and after waiting a little

while he asked her what she was going to say.

'I was going to ask you,' said the nun, waking from her reverie, 'if you

have written to Miss Glynn.'

'Yes, I wrote to her.'

'And she's willing to come back?'

'I haven't spoken to her about that. It didn't occur to me until

afterwards, but I can write at once if you consent.'

'I may be wrong, Oliver, but I don't think she'll care to leave London

and come back here, where she is known.'

'But, Eliza, a girl likes to live in her own country. Mind you, I am

responsible. I drove her out of her country among strangers. She's

living among Protestants.'

'I don't think that will trouble her very much.'

'I don't know why you say that, Eliza. Do you think that a woman cannot

repent? that because she happens to have sinned once--'

'No; I suppose there are repentant sinners, but I think we most often go

on as we begin. Now, you see, Father O'Grady says that she's getting on

very well in London, and we like to live among those who appreciate us.'

'Well, Eliza, of course, if you start with the theory that no one can

repent--'

'I didn't say that, Oliver. But she wouldn't tell you who the man was.

She seems a person of character--I mean, she doesn't seem to be lacking

in strength of character.'

'She's certainly a most excellent musician. You'll find no one like her,

and you may be able to get her very cheap. And if your school doesn't

pay--'

A shade passed across the Reverend Mother's face.

'There's no doubt that the new wing has cost us a great deal of money.'

'Then there are the French nuns--'

'My dear Oliver, if you wish me to engage Miss Glynn as music-mistress

I'll do so. There's no use speaking to me about the French nuns. I'll

engage her because you ask me, but I cannot pay her as much as those who

have diplomas. How much do you think she'd come for?'

'I don't know what she's earning in London, but I suppose you can pay

her an average wage. You could pay her according to results.'

'What you say is quite true, Oliver.' The priest and the nun continued

their walk up and down in front of the unfinished building. 'But you

don't know, Oliver, if she's willing to leave London. You'll have to

write and find out.'

'Very well, Eliza, I'll write. You'll be able to offer her as much as

she was earning in my parish as schoolmistress. That's fifty pounds a

year.'

'It's more than we can afford, Oliver, but if you wish it.'

'I do wish it, Eliza. Thank you. You've taken a great weight off my

mind.'

They passed into the house, and, stopping in front of the writing-table,

the nun looked to see if there were paper and envelopes in the blotter.

'You'll find everything you want, even sealing-wax,' she said. 'Now I'll

leave you.'

_From Father Oliver Gogarty to Miss Nora Glynn._

'TINNICK CONVENT,

'_June 4, 19--_.

'DEAR MISS GLYNN,

'I take it for granted that you received the letter I sent you two days

ago, telling you how much I appreciated your kindness in asking Father

O'Grady to write to tell me that you were quite safe and getting on

well. Since writing that letter I feel more keenly than ever that I owe

you reparation, for it was through an error of judgment on my part that

you are now an exile from your own country. Everyone is agreed that I

have committed an error of judgment. My sister, the Mother Superior of

this convent from where I am writing, is of that opinion. The moment I

mentioned your name she began, "I always thought that--" and I begged of

her to spare me advice on the subject, saying that it was not for advice

that I came to her, but to ask her to help me to make atonement, which

she could do by engaging you to teach music in her convent. You see, I

had heard that my sister was in a difficulty. The new wing is nearly

completed, and she could get the best families in Ireland to send their

daughters to be educated in her convent if she could provide sufficient

musical instruction. I thought you might like to live in your own

country, now that your thoughts have again turned towards God, and I can

imagine the unpleasantness it must be to a Catholic to live in a

Protestant country. I told my sister this, and she answered that if you

wish to come over here, and if Father O'Grady advises it, she will take

you as music-mistress. You will live in the convent. You can enter it,

if you wish, as a postulant, or if you should remain an extern teacher

the salary they will give you will be fifty pounds a year. I know you

can make more than that in London, but you can live more cheaply here,

and you will be among friends.

'I shall be glad to hear from you on this subject.

'Very sincerely yours,

'OLIVER GOGARTY, P.P.'

When he looked up, the darkness under the trees surprised him, and the

geraniums so faintly red on the terrace, and his sister passing up and

down like a phantom.

'Eliza.'

He heard her beads drop, and out of a loose sleeve a slim hand took the

letter. There was not enough light in the room to read by, and she

remained outside, leaning against the glass door.

'You haven't written exactly the letter I should have written, but,

then, we're quite different. I should have written a cold and more

business-like letter.' His face changed expression, and she added: 'I'm

sorry if I'm unsympathetic, Oliver.'

The touch of her hand and the look in her eyes surprised him, for Eliza

was not demonstrative, and he wondered what had called forth this sudden

betrayal of feeling. He expected her to ask him not to send the letter,

but instead of doing so she said:

'If the letter were written otherwise it wouldn't be like yourself,

Oliver. Send it, and if she leaves London and comes back here, I will

think better of her. It will be proof that she has repented. I see

you'll not have an easy mind until you make atonement. You exaggerate, I

think; but everyone for himself in a matter like this.'

'Thank you, Eliza. You always understand.'

'Not always. I failed to understand when you wanted to set up a

hermitage on Castle Island.'

'Yes, you did; you have better sense than I. Yet I feel we are more

alike than the others. You have counted for a great deal in my life,

Eliza. Do you remember saying that you intended to be Reverend Mother?

And now you are Reverend Mother.'

'I don't think I said "I intended." But I felt that if I became a nun,

one day or another I should be Reverend Mother; one knows most often

than not what is going to happen--one's own fate, I mean.'

'I wonder if Mary knows?'

'If she does, I wish she'd tell us.'

'We'll have time to walk round the garden once more. You have no idea

what a pleasure it is for me to see you--to talk with you like this.'

And, talking of Mary, they walked slowly, forgetful of everything but

each other.

A bell rang.

'I must be going; it will be late before I get home.'

'Which way are you going? Round by Kilronan or across the Bridge of

Keel?'

'I came by Kilronan. I think I'll take the other way. There will be a

moon to-night.'

Brother and sister entered the convent.

'You'll enjoy the drive?'

'Yes.' And he fell to thinking of the drive home by the southern road,

the mountains unfolding their many aspects in the gray moonlight, and

melting away in misty perspectives.