The final words of Sarah Ann ere she pranced up the stairs did much to
revive the professor and the major. They sat up and looked at each
other. The expression on their faces was comical in the extreme.
"She meant you, sir!" rasped Gunn.
"She meant yo', suh!" snapped Fitts.
"I think she plainly included both of you," said Dick; "and I fancy it
is the opinion of all present that she hit the nail on the head."
"I don't know about the nail," groaned Zenas; "but I'm sure something
hit me on the head. And that woman--that heartless jade--sat on me! She
nearly finished me!"
"Had she completed the job," declared the major, "it would have been a
blessing, suh. It would have disposed of a pestiferous, weak-minded,
addle-pated, goggle-eyed----"
"Hold on! Stop right there!" cried Zenas. "That will do! You have
reached the limit, sir--the limit!"
"Yo' may think so, suh; but yo'll find this is far from the limit. I am
a man of honor, and I demand satisfaction. I demand blood!"
"He's a butcher!" chuckled Brad.
"You have it already," said Zenas. "Your nose is bleeding, sir."
"You know what I mean. I demand that you meet me in mortal combat. You
escaped me once, but you shall not escape again. I caught you sneaking
around the door of Miss Ketchum's room and----"
"I caught you there, you fabricator!" flung back the professor.
At this point the proprietor of the hotel appeared on the scene and
promptly announced that he would not have such things in his house. He
threatened to eject them both, whereupon Dick hastened to assure the
angry man that he would take care of the professor and see that there
was no further disturbance.
Then Dick and Brad lifted Zenas to his feet and started him up the
stairs, one on either side.
"You shall hear from me again!" cried the major, in defiance of those
who had raised him and were dragging him away.
"Bah, sir!" Zenas flung over his shoulder.
"Boo, suh!" Fitts hurled back.
"Slowly, slowly, boys!" groaned the old pedagogue. "I feel as if all my
joints were dislocated and half my bones were broken. It's a wonder my
head is not mashed flat, for that woman--that creature--sat on it! Then
she called me an old fool!"
"But," said Dick, "you know you could spend your life at her feet,
listening to the musical murmur of her heavenly voice."
"Her voice sounds like tearing a rag!" sneered Zenas. "She's all skin
and bones, and----"
"Why, professor!" interrupted Brad. "I heard you assert that her form
had the grace of a gazelle."
"Never--never said it! She's a hatchet-faced old----"
"Tut! tut!" chided Dick. "You know you admired her the first time you
beheld her intellectual and classic countenance."
"Now stop it, boys! Did you see her glare at me with those fishy eyes?"
"Awful!" exclaimed Dick. "You called her eyes limpid lakes."
"I deny it! I deny it! And she has false teeth, for I heard her mumble
that she lost them when she fell."
"You distinctly stated," reminded Buckhart, "that her teeth were pearls
beyond price."
"I think they cost about eleven dollars a set," estimated Dick.
"And her golden halo of hair came off in the shuffle," said the Texan.
"She's as bald as a billiard ball."
"Say no more!" entreated Zenas. "Get me to my room and spread me on the
bed. Boys, if you ever tell of this--if you ever even mention it
again--I'll send you both back home!"
By this time they had reached their rooms, and they helped the old
fellow to the bed, on which he slowly sank, groaning as if in great
distress.
"Bring me my medicine, Richard," he entreated. "I must have a small
dose. You will find it in my medicine case. The leather-covered flask,
Richard. That's it. Never mind pouring any. I'll take it directly from
the flask. It is a harmless tonic, and I need it greatly just now."
He took a long pull at the leather-covered flask. After that he lay back
and closed his eyes for a moment. Suddenly they popped open and he
exclaimed:
"To think that creature should call me an old fool!"
"But you know pearls of wisdom drop from her sweet lips," laughed Dick.
"And she is a lofty-minded, angelic girl," added Brad.
"Get out of here, you two rascals!" cried the old man. "You're laughing
at me, you ungrateful scamps! Do you want to drive me crazy? Leave me to
meditate on the frailty of human flesh."
The laughing lads retired to the adjoining room.
"Well, one good thing happened," said Dick; "it cured him of his
foolishness over Sarah Ann."
"He sure is well cured," agreed Buckhart.
There came a sharp knock on the door. Before they could open it, it was
flung wide by the giant Nubian, and Aziz Achmet again entered the room.
"This is too much!" exclaimed Dick. "I'll call the proprietor and see if
we are to be annoyed by this man in this outrageous manner."
"Wait a moment, boy," advised the Turk, still maintaining his cool and
insolent manner. "I am here on most important business. Professor Gunn
has been challenged to mortal combat by Major Fitts, and I have come as
the representative of the major to make arrangements for the affair of
honor."
"Well," said Dick, "you may return and tell that little blusterer to go
to a warmer clime! Professor Gunn is not a fighting man, and he will not
meet Major Fitts in a duel."
"Hold on--hold on, Richard!" called the professor, who was beginning to
feel the influence of the "medicine" from the leather-covered flask.
"Don't be so hasty! I want you to understand that I am no coward! That
withered old pippin can't frighten me! No, sir! If he wants to fight a
duel, I'll meet him, and I'll give him all he wants of it!"
"Professor, you----"
"Stop, Richard--stop right there! I know my own business. If I were to
let that mistake from Mississippi drive me into my boots I'd never after
have the face to look at my own reflection in a mirror."
"But a duel, professor--a real duel----"
"I know. It's all right. I'll show him the kind of stuff I'm made of, I
will! He thinks he'll frighten me, but he'll find out he can't jar me a
bit. I'll meet him with weapons of any sort. I'll meet him anywhere!"
"Whoop!" cried Buckhart. "The old boy means it, pard, and I reckon he'll
make good!"
"Mowbry Fitts will find out that I'll make good," said Zenas. "He can't
send his representative here and frighten Zenas Gunn, of Fardale. Fix it
up, Richard. You shall be my second. I leave it all to you. That
unfortunate fall shook me up, and I'm a trifle dizzy. I'll retire again.
But this gentleman had better tell old Fitts to prepare for his funeral.
That's all he'll be good for when I am through with him."
Then Zenas again retired to his room.
Aziz Achmet waited. Dick Merriwell thought swiftly.
"Where and when shall this duel take place?" he asked.
"There is an old cemetery a short distance up the street," said the
Turk.
"Well?"
"It will be an excellent place for the meeting."
"And the hour?"
"Daybreak to-morrow, if it suits you."
"That's all right."
"The weapons----"
"We have the choice of weapons," interrupted Merriwell.
"And you choose swords--or pistols?"
"We will not only choose the weapons, we'll provide them," said the boy.
"I'll have them on hand, Mr. Achmet."
"But it is customary to settle all these little details in advance,
boy."
"You have forced this affair on Professor Gunn. I guarantee that he will
be on hand at the appointed time to-morrow morning. I also guarantee
that he will have the weapons. If you're not satisfied with that, get
out of these rooms and cease to annoy us further."
"That's business!" cried Buckhart.
Achmet seemed to think a moment, but he finally bowed, retreating
gracefully toward the door.
"It is only a single point," he said, "and I shall advise my principal
to concede it. But I wish you to understand that we shall be on our
guard for trickery, and I'll see that Major Fitts has a fair and even
chance."
Then he passed through the door, which the Nubian closed.