A JOKE THAT WENT WRONG
For several days after the prank with the mouse Bob did not play any
jokes. The teacher ascribed that fact to the lecture she had given
him. Bob's mother, who also noticed that he was much more quiet
than usual, feared he was going to be sick.
"I never knew him to be so subdued," she thought. "I think I must
give him some sulphur and molasses. Perhaps he is getting some
disease."
She mentioned it to the captain.
"Nonsense," said the mariner. "He's hatching up some trick, that's
what he's doing. You want to look out."
"Oh, captain, I don't think so!"
"Well, I do. Now you mark my words. It's down on the chart that
Bob is up to some mischief. He's hauled down his colors for a
while, but that's only to fool the enemy. First thing you know
he'll hoist the Jolly Roger, and then there'll be some queer doings
in these waters."
"Hoist the Jolly Roger?"
"I mean turn pirate, so to speak. You keep your eye on that boy,
Lucy. Something's going to break loose or I'm a Dutchman."
Bob's father thought his son's subdued behavior on the few days
following the captain's arrival was due to a hint Bob had obtained,
that, unless he mended his ways, he might be sent on a long voyage
to work his passage.
Now the truth was that Bob was merely waiting for a good chance to
play a trick. He was not particular what sort of a trick it was so
long as it created a laugh. The consequences never gave him a
thought or worry.
So, as he could think of nothing sufficiently "funny" to do, he
remained quiet. But all the while he was looking about to see if he
and his boon companion, Ted Neefus, could not perpetrate some prank
that would be "worth while."
"Things are awful slow," complained Ted one afternoon as he and Bob
walked home from school.
"That's right," agreed Bob. "But wait. I've got a plan."
"What is it?"
Bob looked carefully up and down the street. Then he glanced behind
him. Next he drew Ted into some bushes that lined the thoroughfare
on which they were walking.
"You know what's going to happen Friday night, don't you?" Bob asked.
"No; what?"
"The annual donation party for the minister."
"Well, what of it?"
"I'm going."
"That's nothing. Don't you generally go? So do I, though I don't
see much fun in it. Ma makes me. She says it saves gittin' a meal
at home, but I don't like the stuff they have there."
"I don't either--not much--but I'm going this time and so are you.
Because, listen, something's going to happen."
"Honest?"
Bob nodded vigorously several times. There was a bright twinkle in
his eyes.
"Don't say a word to anybody," he cautioned Ted, "but just you be on
hand. This is going to be the best joke yet."
"Maybe he'll get mad."
"What if he does? He won't know who did it. You and I will be up
in the gallery, or somewhere, and no one will see us. I'll bet
there'll be some fun."
The chief trouble was, as I have pointed out before, that Bob's
ideas of fun and those of other persons did not always agree. Boys
and older folks seldom think the same on any subject, and so how can
they be expected to about "jokes"?
The minister's donation party was an annual affair in Moreville.
Rev. Daniel Blackton, who had charge of the only church in the
village, did not receive a very large salary, and it was the custom
to give him a "donation party" once a year to help pay him.
This usually took the form of a supper, held in the church parlors.
The women of the congregation provided the food, and a small price
was charged for the meal. Nearly every one, including the "men
folks" and the children, attended, and sometimes quite a fair sum
was realized in this way.
In addition, every one who could afford to was expected to bring
some "donation" for the minister. The women would knit him mittens,
or slippers, or socks, they would crochet articles for the
minister's wife, or bring jars of preserves, which were very welcome
at the parsonage.
The men would donate wood, garden products, or whatever they could
best afford. In this way, while the reverend gentleman's salary was
not large, he managed to obtain a comfortable living.
It was to this donation party, or supper, that Bob and Ted were
going, and as they crouched in the shadow of the bushes they
perfected Bob's plan for some fun.
Mrs. Henderson was usually on the committee of arrangements for the
supper, and this occasion was no exception. For a week before she
was busy making pies and cakes and getting great pans of baked beans
ready, for the supper victuals were of a plain but very wholesome
sort.
As Captain Spark was a guest at the Henderson home at the time the
supper was to be held, he, of course, was invited to attend, an
invitation he quickly accepted, for he was fond of hearty eating,
and he was not ashore often enough so that such affairs as donation
suppers were distasteful to him, as they are to some persons.
At last the eventful evening came. Bob, dressed in his best suit,
prepared to accompany his parents and Captain Spark to the church.
Such a thing as their son attempting a joke at the donation supper
never occurred to Mr. or Mrs. Henderson. It is true that at the
affair there was more or less jollity and good-natured fun after the
formal function of supper was over and the minister had asked the
blessing. But no one had ever dared play such a joke as Bob
contemplated. If his mother had in the least suspected him of even
dreaming of it she would have made him stay at home.
There was a good-sized throng in the church when the Henderson party
arrived. Long tables had been set in the parlors, which were back
of the church proper. Women in long white aprons were hurrying to
and fro, getting ready to serve the meal. Bob followed his parents
and the captain into the edifice.
"Is everything all ready?" asked Ted Neefus in a whisper as he
approached Bob.
"Don't come near me," was the cautious answer. "Folks'll suspect if
they see us together."
So Ted quickly glided away and was lost in the crowd.
The tables were all set, the victuals put on, and nearly every one
had arrived.
"I guess we'd better get the chairs up now," proposed Mrs. Olney,
who with Mrs. Henderson was superintending things. "Some of the
boys can do it."
"I will, mom," volunteered Bob, who stood near his mother. "I'll
get some of the fellows to help me."
"That's good," said Mrs. Henderson.
Bob hurried away, and soon he, Ted Neefus, Will Merton, Sam Shoop
and some other chums were placing the chairs at the long tables.
"Is it all ready?" asked Ted in a hoarse whisper.
"Hush, can't you!" cautioned Bob. "Do you want to give it away?"
All was in readiness for the grown folks to sit down. They would
eat first, then the tables would be set anew and the young people
would have their turn. There was always more fun at the second
table, and Bob and his chums would take their meals there.
Some one told Rev. Daniel Blackton that supper was ready, and he
moved up to the head of the table, prepared to say grace. In honor
of Mrs. Henderson, who was one of the chief workers in the church,
her relative, Captain Spark, had been accorded a place next to the
minister.
"Come on up in the gallery now," said Bob to Ted. "We can see the
fun from there." Bob had been busy straightening the chairs near
the head of the table.
Just as the boys reached the gallery, the assembled diners took
their seats. The reverend gentleman stood up to say grace, and then
sat down.
"How long before it works?" asked Ted.
"It's working now," replied Bob, "but you won't see the full effect
until he gets up."
"Think he'll make much of a fuss?"
"Naw. He's too good-natured. He'll only laugh."
The meal progressed. To and fro went the women with big plates of
food. Every one seemed to have a good appetite, and some young
people, who were hungry, began to think the grown folks would never
get done.
But at last there was a general scraping of chairs as they were
pushed back.
"Watch now!" called Bob to several of his cronies who were with him
in the gallery that overlooked the room where supper was being
served. "He's getting up."
In fact nearly every one was leaving the table. The tall form of
Rev. Daniel Blackton was seen to rise. Something else arose also.
It was the minister's chair. He felt that something was wrong, and
half turned around. What he saw caused a deep flush to spread over
his pale face.
His chair was glued fast to him, and wherever he moved the chair
went too!
"Oh!" exclaimed Bob in a hoarse and horrified whisper. "I put the
stuff on the wrong chair! I wanted Captain Spark to stick fast, and
I put it on the minister's chair by mistake!"
By this time the dominie was endeavoring to pull the chair loose
from the seat of his trousers. But the glue Bob had spread was very
sticky. Pull and tug as he did, the minister could not free himself.
First there was a murmur, then some one laughed. In a moment the
whole room was in an uproar.
"You'll catch it!" prophesied Ted, in an awestruck whisper.
"I won't unless some of you squeal on me," declared Bob.
He looked over the balcony railing at the struggling minister, who
was trying in vain to get free from the chair.
"Nobody'll squeal," declared Will Merton.
"Of course not," added Sam Shoop.