A great French writer has said, with as much grace as philosophy, that
the artist and man of letters needs only a black coat and the absence
of all pretension to place him on the level of the best society.
It must be observed, however, that this remark applies only to the
intellectual workers, who, if they do occasionally commit a minor
solecism in dress or manners, are forgiven on account of their fame
and talents. Other individuals are compelled to study what we have
elsewhere called the "by-laws of society;" and it would be well if
artists and men of letters would more frequently do the same. It is
not enough that a man should be clever, or well educated, or well
born; to take his place in society he must be acquainted with all that
this little book proposes to teach. He must, above all else, know
how to enter the room, how to bow, and how to dress. Of these three
indispensable qualifications, the most important, because the most
observed, is the latter.
A gentleman should always be so well dressed that his dress shall
never be observed at all. Does this sound like an enigma? It is not
meant for one. It only implies that perfect simplicity is perfect
elegance, and that the true test of taste in the toilette of a
gentleman is its entire harmony, unobtrusiveness and becomingness. If
any friend should say to you, "What a handsome waistcoat you have
on!" you may depend that a less handsome waistcoat would be in better
taste. If you hear it said that Mr. So-and-So wears superb jewellery,
you may conclude beforehand that he wears too much. Display, in short,
is ever to be avoided, especially in matters of dress. The toilette
is the domain of the fair sex. Let a wise man leave its graces and
luxuries to his wife, daughters or sisters, and seek to be himself
appreciated for something of higher worth than the embroidery upon his
shirt front, or the trinkets on his chain.
To be too much in the fashion is as vulgar as to be too far behind
it. No really well-bred man follows every new cut that he sees in his
tailor's fashion-book. Only very young men, and those not of the most
aristocratic circles, are guilty of this folly.
The author of "Pelham" has aptly said that a gentleman's coat
should not fit too well. There is great truth and subtlety in this
observation. To be fitted _too_ well is to look like a tailor's
assistant. This is the great fault which we have to find in the style
of even the best bred Frenchmen. They look as if they had just stepped
out of a fashion-book, and lack the careless ease which makes an
English gentleman look as if his clothes belonged to him, and not he
to his clothes.
In the morning wear frock coats, double-breasted waistcoats, and
trousers of light or dark colours, according to the season.
In the evening, though only in the bosom of your own family, wear only
black, and be as scrupulous to put on a dress coat as if you expected
visitors. If you have sons, bring them up to do the same. It is the
observance of these minor trifles in domestic etiquette which marks
the true gentleman.
For evening parties, dinner parties, and balls, wear a black dress
coat, black trousers, black silk or cloth waistcoat, white cravat,
white or grey kid gloves, and thin patent leather boots. A black
cravat may be worn in full dress, but is not so elegant as a white
one. A black velvet waistcoat should only be worn at a dinner party.
Let your jewellery be of the best, but the least gaudy description,
and wear it very sparingly. A set of good studs, a gold watch and
guard, and one handsome ring, are as many ornaments as a gentleman can
wear with propriety. In the morning let your ring be a seal ring,
with your crest or arms engraved upon it. In the evening it may be a
diamond. Your studs, however valuable, should be small.
It is well to remember in the choice of jewellery that mere costliness
is not always the test of value; and that an exquisite work of art,
such as a fine cameo, or a natural rarity, such as a black pearl, is a
more _distingué_ possession than a large brilliant which any rich and
tasteless vulgarian can buy as easily as yourself. For a ring, the
gentleman of fine taste would prefer a precious antique _intaglio_
to the handsomest diamond or ruby that could be brought at Hunt and
Roskell's. The most elegant gentleman with whom the author was ever
acquainted--a man familiar with all the Courts of Europe--never wore
any other shirt-studs in full dress than three valuable black pearls,
each about the size of a pea, and by no means beautiful to look at.
Of all precious stones, the opal is one of the most lovely and the
least common-place. No vulgar man purchases an opal. He invariably
prefers the more showy diamond, ruby, sapphire, or emerald.
Unless you are a snuff-taker, never carry any but a white
pocket-handkerchief.
If in the morning you wear a long cravat fastened by a pin, be careful
to avoid what may be called _alliteration_ of colour. We have seen
a torquoise pin worn in a violet-coloured cravat, and the effect
was frightful. Choose, if possible, complementary colours, and their
secondaries. For instance, if the stone in your pin be a torquoise,
wear it with brown, or crimson mixed with black, or black and orange.
If a ruby, contrast it with shades of green. The same rule holds good
with regard to the mixture and contrast of colours in your waistcoat
or cravat. Thus, a buff waistcoat and a blue tie, or brown and blue,
or brown and green, or brown and magenta, green and magenta, green and
mauve, are all good arrangements of colour.
Very light coloured cloths for morning wear are to be avoided, even
in the height of summer; and fancy cloths of strange patterns and
mixtures are exceedingly objectionable.
Coloured shirts may be worn in the morning; but they should be small
in pattern, and quiet in colour.
With a coloured shirt, always wear a white collar.
Never wear a cap, unless in the fields or garden; and let your hat be
always black.
For a gentleman's wedding dress see the "ETIQUETTE OF COURTSHIP AND
MARRIAGE."
If your sight compels you to wear spectacles, let them be of the best
and lightest make, and mounted in gold or blue steel.
If you suffer from weak sight, and are obliged to wear coloured
glasses, let them be of blue or smoke colour. Green are detestable.
Never be seen in the street without gloves; and never let your gloves
be of any material that is not kid or calf. Worsted or cotton gloves
are unutterably vulgar. Your gloves should fit to the last degree of
perfection.
In these days of public baths and universal progress, we trust that
it is unnecessary to do more than hint at the necessity of the most
fastidious personal cleanliness. The hair, the teeth, the
nails, should be faultlessly kept; and a soiled shirt, a dingy
pocket-handkerchief, or a light waistcoat that has been worn once
too often, are things to be scrupulously avoided by any man who is
ambitious of preserving the exterior of a gentleman.
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