WHEN Oliver Cromwell first coined his money, an old cavalier
looking upon one of the new pieces, read this inscription on
one side, _God with us_; on the other side, _The
Commonwealth of England_. I see, said he, _God and the
Commonwealth are on different sides._
_Salem Mercury,_ June 26, 1787.
Two different ways of telling a story.
_Anecdote_. A CLERGYMAN, who in the Matrimonial Lottery had
drawn much worse than a _blank_, and, without the patience
of Socrates, had to encounter the turbulent spirit of
Xantippe, was interrupted in the middle of a _Curtain
Lecture_, by the arrival of a pair, requesting his
assistance to introduce them to the _blessed_ state of
Wedlock. The poor Priest, actuated at the moment by his own
feelings and particular _experience_, rather than a sense of
canonical duty, opened the book, and began: "_Man, that is
born of a Woman, hath but a short time to live, and is full
of trouble, &c., &c.,_" repeating the _burial_ service. The
astonished Bridegroom exclaimed, "Sir! Sir! you mistake, I
came here to be _married_, not _buried_!" "Well (replied the
Clergyman), if you insist on it, I am _obliged_ to marry
you--but believe me, my friend, you had _better_ be
_buried_."
_Columbian Centinel,_ March 12, 1791.
* * * * *
ANECDOTE. It is doubtless recollected that Dean Swift,
though a great favorite among the ladies, was (no doubt for
good and substantial reasons) nevertheless a bachelor. His
opinion of the married state seemed to be not very much
exalted. On one occasion, he had been called upon to marry a
couple, and after getting them properly arranged, commenced
as follows: "Man, that is born of a woman, hath but a short
time to live, and is full of misery," &c. "My dear sir,"
interrupted the bridegroom, "you are reading the burial
service, instead of the matrimonial." "Never mind, friend,"
whispered the Dean, "_you had better be buried than
married_."
_Salem Observer,_ 1834.
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