CHAPTER LIII. THE FRIEND IS FOUND.

Mrs. Ellmother looked into the parlor. “I told you Mr. Mirabel would

call again,” she announced. “Here he is.”

“Has he asked to see me?”

“He leaves it entirely to you.”

For a moment, and a moment only, Emily was undecided. “Show him in,” she

said.

Mirabel’s embarrassment was visible the moment he entered the room.

For the first time in his life--in the presence of a woman--the

popular preacher was shy. He who had taken hundreds of fair hands with

sympathetic pressure--he who had offered fluent consolation, abroad and

at home, to beauty in distress--was conscious of a rising color, and was

absolutely at a loss for words when Emily received him. And yet, though

he appeared at disadvantage--and, worse still, though he was aware of

it himself--there was nothing contemptible in his look and manner. His

silence and confusion revealed a change in him which inspired respect.

Love had developed this spoiled darling of foolish congregations, this

effeminate pet of drawing-rooms and boudoirs, into the likeness of a

Man--and no woman, in Emily’s position, could have failed to see that it

was love which she herself had inspired.

Equally ill at ease, they both took refuge in the commonplace phrases

suggested by the occasion. These exhausted there was a pause. Mirabel

alluded to Cecilia, as a means of continuing the conversation.

“Have you seen Miss Wyvil?” he inquired.

“She was here last night; and I expect to see her again to-day before

she returns to Monksmoor with her father. Do you go back with them?”

“Yes--if _you_ do.”

“I remain in London.”

“Then I remain in London, too.”

The strong feeling that was in him had forced its way to expression

at last. In happier days--when she had persistently refused to let him

speak to her seriously--she would have been ready with a light-hearted

reply. She was silent now. Mirabel pleaded with her not to misunderstand

him, by an honest confession of his motives which presented him under a

new aspect. The easy plausible man, who had hardly ever seemed to be in

earnest before--meant, seriously meant, what he said now.

“May I try to explain myself?” he asked.

“Certainly, if you wish it.”

“Pray, don’t suppose me capable,” Mirabel said earnestly, “of presuming

to pay you an idle compliment. I cannot think of you, alone and in

trouble, without feeling anxiety which can only be relieved in one

way--I must be near enough to hear of you, day by day. Not by repeating

this visit! Unless you wish it, I will not again cross the threshold

of your door. Mrs. Ellmother will tell me if your mind is more at ease;

Mrs. Ellmother will tell me if there is any new trial of your fortitude.

She needn’t even mention that I have been speaking to her at the

door; and she may be sure, and you may be sure, that I shall ask no

inquisitive questions. I can feel for you in your misfortune, without

wishing to know what that misfortune is. If I can ever be of the

smallest use, think of me as your other servant. Say to Mrs. Ellmother,

‘I want him’--and say no more.”

Where is the woman who could have resisted such devotion as

this--inspired, truly inspired, by herself? Emily’s eyes softened as she

answered him.

“You little know how your kindness touches me,” she said.

“Don’t speak of my kindness until you have put me to the proof,” he

interposed. “Can a friend (such a friend as I am, I mean) be of any

use?”

“Of the greatest use if I could feel justified in trying you.”

“I entreat you to try me!”

“But, Mr. Mirabel, you don’t know what I am thinking of.”

“I don’t want to know.”

“I may be wrong. My friends all say I _am_ wrong.”

“I don’t care what your friends say; I don’t care about any earthly

thing but your tranquillity. Does your dog ask whether you are right or

wrong? I am your dog. I think of You, and I think of nothing else.”

She looked back through the experience of the last few days. Miss

Ladd--Mrs. Ellmother--Doctor Allday: not one of them had felt for her,

not one of them had spoken to her, as this man had felt and had spoken.

She remembered the dreadful sense of solitude and helplessness which

had wrung her heart, in the interval before Mirabel came in. Her father

himself could hardly have been kinder to her than this friend of a few

weeks only. She looked at him through her tears; she could say nothing

that was eloquent, nothing even that was adequate. “You are very good to

me,” was her only acknowledgment of all that he had offered. How poor it

seemed to be! and yet how much it meant!

He rose--saying considerately that he would leave her to recover

herself, and would wait to hear if he was wanted.

“No,” she said; “I must not let you go. In common gratitude I ought

to decide before you leave me, and I do decide to take you into my

confidence.” She hesitated; her color rose a little. “I know how

unselfishly you offer me your help,” she resumed; “I know you speak to

me as a brother might speak to a sister--”

He gently interrupted her. “No,” he said; “I can’t honestly claim to do

that. And--may I venture to remind you?--you know why.”

She started. Her eyes rested on him with a momentary expression of

reproach.

“Is it quite fair,” she asked, “in my situation, to say that?”

“Would it have been quite fair,” he rejoined, “to allow you to deceive

yourself? Should I deserve to be taken into your confidence, if I

encouraged you to trust me, under false pretenses? Not a word more of

those hopes on which the happiness of my life depends shall pass my

lips, unless you permit it. In my devotion to your interests, I promise

to forget myself. My motives may be misinterpreted; my position may be

misunderstood. Ignorant people may take me for that other happier man,

who is an object of interest to you--”

“Stop, Mr. Mirabel! The person to whom you refer has no such claim on me

as you suppose.”

“Dare I say how happy I am to hear it? Will you forgive me?”

“I will forgive you if you say no more.”

Their eyes met. Completely overcome by the new hope that she had

inspired, Mirabel was unable to answer her. His sensitive nerves

trembled under emotion, like the nerves of a woman; his delicate

complexion faded away slowly into whiteness. Emily was alarmed--he

seemed to be on the point of fainting. She ran to the window to open it

more widely.

“Pray don’t trouble yourself,” he said, “I am easily agitated by any

sudden sensation--and I am a little overcome at this moment by my own

happiness.”

“Let me give you a glass of wine.”

“Thank you--I don’t need it indeed.”

“You really feel better?”

“I feel quite well again--and eager to hear how I can serve you.”

“It’s a long story, Mr. Mirabel--and a dreadful story.”

“Dreadful?”

“Yes! Let me tell you first how you can serve me. I am in search of

a man who has done me the cruelest wrong that one human creature can

inflict on another. But the chances are all against me--I am only

a woman; and I don’t know how to take even the first step toward

discovery.”

“You will know, when I guide you.”

He reminded her tenderly of what she might expect from him, and was

rewarded by a grateful look. Seeing nothing, suspecting nothing, they

advanced together nearer and nearer to the end.

“Once or twice,” Emily continued, “I spoke to you of my poor father,

when we were at Monksmoor--and I must speak of him again. You could have

no interest in inquiring about a stranger--and you cannot have heard how

he died.”

“Pardon me, I heard from Mr. Wyvil how he died.”

“You heard what I had told Mr. Wyvil,” Emily said: “I was wrong.”

“Wrong!” Mirabel exclaimed, in a tone of courteous surprise. “Was it not

a sudden death?”

“It _was_ a sudden death.”

“Caused by disease of the heart?”

“Caused by no disease. I have been deceived about my father’s death--and

I have only discovered it a few days since.”

At the impending moment of the frightful shock which she was innocently

about to inflict on him, she stopped--doubtful whether it would be best

to relate how the discovery had been made, or to pass at once to the

result. Mirabel supposed that she had paused to control her agitation.

He was so immeasurably far away from the faintest suspicion of what was

coming that he exerted his ingenuity, in the hope of sparing her.

“I can anticipate the rest,” he said. “Your sad loss has been caused by

some fatal accident. Let us change the subject; tell me more of that man

whom I must help you to find. It will only distress you to dwell on your

father’s death.”

“Distress me?” she repeated. “His death maddens me!”

“Oh, don’t say that!”

“Hear me! hear me! My father died murdered, at Zeeland--and the man you

must help me to find is the wretch who killed him.”

She started to her feet with a cry of terror. Mirabel dropped from his

chair senseless to the floor.

"I Say No" · 第 53 / 67 章