[Illustration]
"The beautiful is the suitable." "A woman careless of her dress is
either unloved, or unhappy." "Dress is to the body what good sense is
to the mind." "Dress is really a department of manners," and appeals
to the eye with the same force that gracious words and softly keyed
voices appeal to the ear. Costliness is not the measure of the beauty
of dress. Nay, rather suitability, harmony, becomingness,
unobtrusiveness, fitness for the place and person are the qualities
that make it perfect.
And because these canons of good taste are so frequently sinned
against it has seemed best to give the proper dress and appointments
for the proper times. Not as to particular styles for they are
fleeting as the breath of fashion, but as to general principles which
are well nigh changeless. Once certain of these fundamental
principles, embarrassment and self-consciousness are banished.
Dress at Home.
It is, perhaps, the dress at home that tells most of the care and
character of the wearer. Much regard is given to the dress for other
occasions, but here comes the test of delicacy and refinement, the
criterion of the individual.
Neatness is the first requisite, suitability the second. There is
nothing more of an offense to good taste than seeing the delicate
fabric, the ribbons, the laces of a once elegant toilet, degraded to
the uses of the kitchen, spotted and soiled almost beyond recognition.
Have gowns adapted to the tasks for which they are intended. The neat
gingham, the plain wool gown, are pretty and appropriate for the
morning wear of any lady who must superintend the workings of her own
household. Aprons, gloves, dust caps, which can be quickly doffed and
will leave her neat and presentable for the stray morning caller
without the necessity, on her part, of a change of costume, and on
his, of a tedious waiting.
For afternoon the prettiest of toilets may be worn in the shape of
house-dresses, or tea-jackets made of otherwise useless remnants of
bright silks, and ribbons may be used to wear with otherwise
presentable skirts whose original bodices have been long outworn.
Trains, medium, are always pretty in the house, hence tea-gowns, from
the richest to the most modest in cost, are always in favor. Avoid
very short skirts for the house; they are awkward, and belittle you
from a mental as well as a physical standpoint.
Observe the utmost neatness in every detail of the toilet for home or
street. It is an old rule, but a very good one, that a woman may be
judged "by her boots, gloves and pocket-handkerchiefs." To this may be
added "finger nails," and last but not least, skirt edges. "No matter
how elegant the general get-up may be," asserts one fastidious critic,
"if a woman's skirt binding is muddy, frayed, or pendant, she is, to
my mind, not a gentlewoman."
The General Fitness.
The style of the person should have much to do with choosing the style
of dress for any occasion. Only people lacking the slightest
originality of mind would think of blindly following the dictates of
fashion without any reference to their own physical style.
Very short women should not wear very large hats. Women with very thin
faces should avoid wide hat brims and many plumes. Women with large,
full faces should not go to the extreme in wearing small bonnets. To
do so is but to exaggerate the defect in each case. No matter what the
extremity of style may be, there is always a happy medium from which
to choose.
Flying curls and a great superabundance of ribbons and fluttering ends
belong only to a young girl. To persist in an extremely youthful
style of dress long after the passing of youth, instead of adding to
the apparent youth of the wearer, simply defeats its own end by
exaggerating the defects it was meant to conceal.
Small, thin women should not wear too much black. Let them wear a
profusion of fluffy laces about the throat; soft, puffy vests, or, as
one writer observes, "learn something from Sara Bernhardt and her
consummate skill in concealing bones."
Short, stout women should see that all adornments, such as folds,
plaits, etc., keep as much as possible in perpendicular lines. It is a
mistake to think that perfect plainness will disguise the breadth, it
rather emphasizes it. On this style of woman a loosely-fitted wrap has
a better effect for the street than a tight, plain garment.
Common-Sense Sleeves.
A very stout or a very thin woman should never wear extremely light
sleeves, no matter what the style may be. The stout woman should also
avoid an elbow sleeve with loosely falling ruffles, and the trimming,
if possible, should run in lengthwise folds or bands. This precaution
tends to decrease the apparent size of the arm. The slender woman, on
the contrary, is much improved by the puffed elbow sleeve ending with
a fall of lace.
Let women learn to put on belts so that they will slip downward in
front and up in the back. This does everything for the waist in making
it look slender and graceful. If yokes are worn, it is well to
remember that a deep yoke is more becoming than a narrow one. If it is
short in front, it looks awkward, and if it is short behind, it gives
a round shouldered effect.
Where a rich toilet is worn for any occasion, be sure that everything
is in keeping. If the gown be of velvet do not wear with it a linen
collar or cheap lace. If real lace is beyond the means there are
always the filmy tulles and _crepe lisse_. If jewelry is worn, it
should be of the best, be it much or little. The fan, also, for such a
costume should carry out the idea of luxury.
Cheap, fanciful, pretty things have their place in connection with
soft wool, or pretty cotton costumes, but "lightness or grace is one
thing; magnificence or luxury, another."
A very young girl should never wear rich, heavy fabrics; they are
unsuited to her youthful face and ways.
The evils of tight lacing are so pronounced that it would seem almost
unnecessary to remonstrate against them in this age of enlightenment,
were they not so continually forced upon our view. Nothing could be
more unbecoming to the women fair, fat and forty, who are usually the
ones to adopt this custom; an inch less in waist is hardly gained at
the price of an unbecoming flush, a labored breathing, and a serious
injury to the health, besides the lack of grace that comes from
binding and constricting any portion of the human form divine.
Gloves and Shoes.
To have many dresses is always a mistake even among the very wealthy.
They are constantly going out of fashion and unless the owner is
continually seen at balls, receptions and other gatherings, they are
entirely unnecessary.
The glove of to-day is fitted comfortably. Nothing is more indicative
of a lack of taste than to crowd the hand into a glove that is several
sizes too small for it. The same might be said of the foot, and with
more reason, since a painfully tight shoe not only injures the health,
comfort and complexion of the wearer, but is ruinous to all grace of
carriage.
There is nothing marks the true lady as much as the perfection of
neatness and style in gloves and shoes. To be well gloved and to have
one's feet neatly clad, no matter how plain the attire, is to be well
dressed.
(Other hints on this subject will be found in the departments of "Art
in Dress" and "Colors and Complexions.")
The umbrella, too, must be carefully chosen. If it is possible to have
parasols and umbrellas for different occasions, then there is no
difficulty of choice, but where one must answer for all occasions of
the season, let it be a plain, dark or black silk. This will be
suitable at all times, but if the fancy of the moment, as to pale and
delicate colorings be consulted, the result is too often painfully
incongruous. In buying gloves, shoes or umbrellas, it is worth while
to invest in a good article. There is no economy in the poorer grades.
Artifices of the Toilet.
All artificial aids to beauty should be sparingly used, and have no
place whatever upon the toilet table of the young girl. Powder and
paint are so obvious to the eye, that their use, or rather abuse, by
some otherwise sensible women, is a continual wonder. A dust of rice
powder is sometimes excusable, but there can be no possible apology
for the "made-up" faces one sees upon our streets. They deceive no one
and have no excuse for being. The woman who stands in the pitiless
glare of the footlights must needs add color to replace that stolen
from her face by the strong white light of day, but others have no
such excuse for "frescoing" the face. It is a sin alike against good
taste and good breeding.
There are various simple preparations that can be used to clear the
skin, and various massage treatments to smooth out the cruel little
lines that time writes on all faces, and kindly unguents to fill out
the hollow cheeks and temples, and thus keep the outlines of youth a
little longer. And there is wholesome living and vigorous exercise,
and daily and revivifying baths to call the flush of health to the
cheek; and loving thoughts and kindly deeds to keep the eyes soft and
bright, and thus to set the inroads of time at defiance for many
years. And since a woman is no older than she looks, and since the
prerogatives of youth are dear to the heart, it is her bounden duty to
keep herself sweet and young.
There is one excusable addition to the personal charms and that is
where nature has denied the grace of luxuriant locks. This lack can be
so cunningly supplied by the hairdresser's art that detection is
impossible, and as it ever has been, and ever will be, that a woman's
hair is a glory unto her, there can be no reason against her hiding
from view any lack of it when it is done in an artistic fashion.
When to Wear Jewels.
Mme. de Maintenon declared that good taste simply indicates good
sense, but many women who boast of good sense seem not to have the
slightest idea of the times and places for wearing precious stones.
It is conceded by all authorities that articles of adornment
consisting of or containing jewels or precious stones should never be
worn in the street. Exception is made in favor of rings and watches.
The woman who wishes to adopt correct form in dress will never wear
any but the simplest little pin to fasten her gown at the throat
during the morning hours and on the street.
For ceremonious visits, a pretty and ornamental pin of gold is proper,
or of gold and enamel, but even then it should have a useful purpose;
it should fasten some part of the toilet. The enameled and gold
wreaths of myrtle or of forget-me-nots are extremely pretty for these
simple pins. So are the true love-nots or a flower of enamel upon
gold, but without the all-prevailing diamond dewdrop or center.
For dinner, a woman may wear the richest gems, it being understood
that the function is a ceremonious one, and that she shall wear a low
gown. Should she dine in a more democratic way and the men of the
family do not wear evening dress, she naturally will wear a high gown
or one possibly open a little at the throat. She may wear a pin with a
single gem under these circumstances.
For balls, operas or entertainments of corresponding splendor, a
woman, when she is not herself the hostess, may wear any number of
well-chosen jewels. It is quite correct to be sumptuous in this
particular, but well to remember that jewels, like flowers, harmonize
or do not harmonize, and that emeralds and turquoises, for example,
may not be worn in conjunction, because, as the French say, "they
swear at each other."
It is not good form to wear ornaments made in the form of beasts or
reptiles. The sacred emblem of the cross set in shining jewels and
worn at ball or rout, shows a most pitiable ignorance of the eternal
fitness of things.
Well bred young girls are limited as to jewels--a string of pearls for
the slender neck, a ring with the natal stone or an armament of
turquoises and pearls, a little gold love manacle about the wrist,
that is all, and quite enough until after marriage. A bride may wear
for the marriage ceremony either diamonds or pearls--not in
profusion--but never gold ornaments.
Use of Scents and Flowers.
The use of various scents is more sinned against than any other toilet
accessory. Only the faintest suggestion of perfume should be allowed
to hang about the garments of a well-bred woman or girl. To wear any
redolence on the person in the shape of sachet bags is unpardonable.
To many people strong perfumes are extremely unpleasant, and those who
have regard for the feelings of others would forbear their use for
this reason alone, even were it not a sin against the canons of good
breeding as well.
When perfumes are used, it is a dainty custom to choose one favorite
scent and to use that, and that only, so that in time the sweet,
illusive odor becomes almost a part of the personality.
Flowers, fresh, dewy flowers seem the natural adornment of youth
especially, and to forswear the pretty custom would appear an
uncalled-for giving up of the sweet thought which dedicates the
flowers of the field to their human prototypes. Yet there is reason in
the custom that has, in great measure, withdrawn them from the heated
ball-room and the artificially illuminated dinner table.
Corsage bouquets, in dancing, become an early ruin. Carried in the
hand at a ball, they are speedily tossed aside on the nearest point of
refuge and left there to ignominiously fade. When flowers are worn at
an evening entertainment, choose those that will best stand the light
and heat.
The Face Veil.
In spite of the protestations of oculists, women continue to regard
veils as an essential part of their toilets; first, because they are
becoming; and, second, because they keep their hair in order. The
plain tulles and nets, which come in all colors, single and double
widths, are always pleasant to wear and less trying to the eyes than
the coarser meshes. The veil of Brussels net wrought in sprigged
designs is a failure. It is becoming to nobody, and is essentially
inartistic.
Women with dark hair and eyes and a brilliant color look well in veils
with the dots larger and nearer together. If the skin is clear, white
veils are very becoming, though apt to give an impression of a made-up
complexion. The woman with fair hair and blue eyes, and without color,
generally looks best in a large meshed black veil, with the dots--if
dots are worn--far apart. A navy blue veil makes the skin look clear
and fair, and a gray veil should never be worn by the pale or sallow
woman.
When to Wear Gloves.
The question of when to wear gloves is a much disputed point in the
etiquette of dress. They are worn to dinner parties, but custom
prescribes that they shall be removed in sitting down at the table.
After using the finger-bowl, the gloves should be resumed before
leaving the table, or else immediately after returning to the
drawing-room. To wear gloves while assisting to pour tea for an "at
home," is out of place, but it is very usual to wear them while
receiving in the afternoon, though their omission at such a time is
pardonable. The visitors, of course, wear both gloves and bonnets.
At a "stand-up" evening supper it is not usual to remove the gloves
since there is really no time or place to do it, where each one is
expected to leave as soon as possible to make room for the next.
Remove the hand only of the right glove and tuck it back under the
wrist.
Dancing parties always call for gloves, preferably light in tint. To
wear gloves while playing cards is also an unnecessary affectation of
elegance. Walking, driving, shopping and all outdoor events, such as
lawn parties, etc., call for gloves. Tint and quality of these are to
be regulated by the occasion or the costume.
When to Wear Low-cut Gowns.
This question has but one answer, "Never by daylight." In this respect
the rule that governs the wearing of a man's dress suit--"from dusk to
dawn," is applicable. Even on those occasions when the jealous
daylight is shut out and candlelight reigns, dress suits and full
_decollete_ gowns are not permissible. A concession can be made by
cutting the corsage a little low in the throat, and by elbow sleeves
or almost no sleeves.
For every social function held from midday to a late dinner hour,
young girls, especially, should wear their gowns cut high with long
sleeves, except on some gala occasion, when the rule may be somewhat
relaxed as above.
Even at balls, evening parties, late dinners, the young girl's evening
dress, if _decollete_, should be very modest in cut. Where a dinner
and dance follow a large afternoon reception and the men who are
invited are apt to arrive at dinner in full evening dress, a girl's
dress may be somewhat elaborated, but not to the extreme of ball
costume.
Ball Dress.
For the ball-room the most elaborate dress is to be worn; _decollete_
corsage, flowers and jewels are all appropriate. Those who dance
should wear pale colors and light, floating fabrics, leaving the heavy
silks and velvets for those who do not indulge in this amusement.
A low-cut corsage is not expected of elderly women unless they wish
it. Chaperons can wear an elegant dinner dress if they desire; velvets
or brocades, cut square in the neck, with a profusion of fine lace and
rich ornaments. In short, she should be as different as possible from
her charge.
If an elderly woman of full figure wears a low-necked dress, a lace
scarf or something of that sort should be thrown over her shoulders.
Gowns cut dancing length or with train, are appropriate for the
ball-room, but where much dancing is to be indulged in, trains are
very much in the way.
Opera Dress.
For the opera the most elegant dressing is desirable. Ladies may wear
evening gowns, and men dress suits. If they occupy boxes this is
almost an obligation. Light colors render the house more
attractive--are, in fact, a part of the whole spectacle. Jewels and
flowers are there, and those who wear visiting or street costume are
in the minority.
If a man wear a dress suit it is expected that the woman will show him
sufficient respect to wear an evening gown. The man's costume is
donned out of respect for the occasion and the woman, and she betrays
utter ignorance or remissness of duty when she does not return the
compliment in kind.
High hats are an abomination at opera or theater. Where anything is
worn upon the head, it should be in the shape of a tiny bonnet, a
dainty confection of tulle, flowers and ribbon.
This is especially necessary where a public conveyance must be made
use of to reach the place. At an opera matinee the bonnet must be worn
in connection with an elegant visiting or reception costume.
Middle-aged women wear the same costume at the opera that they would
at a dinner party.
Theater Costume.
To dress for the theater is a much simpler matter than for the opera.
Display is not required here. Elegant visiting or promenade costume is
appropriate. Dressy little bonnets or small hats, gloves, either
matching the gown or light in tint, complete the theater toilet. If a
large hat is worn to the theater, common courtesy demands its removal
that those in the rear may see the stage.
Dress for concerts admits of a little more display than for the
theater. A silk gown with a little lace and jewelry, and white or
light kid gloves.
Dinner Dress.
A lady's dinner dress may be elegant as her fancy dictates. But if she
is hostess she should never try to eclipse her guests. Trained gowns
are eminently suitable, and may be worn by maids or matrons alike.
Full length trains are not necessary, and even demi-trains need not be
worn by very young women. But the soft sweep of a train lends an added
grace to a woman's gown, and this is one of the few places where it
can be appropriately worn. The corsage may be cut square, or
heart-shaped, or opened at the throat in any pretty way, but never so
low as for a ball dress. Sleeves are usually half length, and
bracelets are given an opportunity for display. Long gloves must be
worn. As to color, all shades, from the safe selection of a black silk
or velvet, down to the palest tints, are in order, the only proviso
being that color and material suit the style of the wearer. An elderly
lady inclined to stoutness, and with a florid cast of countenance, is
at her worst in light silks or satin. They heighten her defects, while
darker shades subdue her coloring and serve to decrease her apparent
size and superfluous breadth.
For a young girl, a simple dress of wool goods in white, or pale
becoming tints, is all that is necessary. Open it slightly at the
throat, soften it with a little lace, show the pretty arms in a
demi-sleeve, and it is far more suited to her youth than an
over-elaborate gown.
If the dinner is held by daylight and the men wear morning dress the
ladies must confine themselves to high-cut gowns turned in slightly at
the front and fastened with a simple pin of gold enamel, with,
perhaps, a single gem at its heart.
Traveling Notes.
A dress for traveling should be plain and serviceable; a tint should
be chosen that does not show soil or dust. A duster, an ulster or
over-garment of some kind made of pongee silk, linen or whatever
material is in vogue, should be worn to protect the costume from smoke
and dust.
[Illustration: TRAVELING COSTUME.]
The hat should be plain and a veil worn to shield the eyes from
cinders when traveling by railway. A pair of slightly smoked
spectacles are very good for this purpose. Carry an extra wrap and a
hand-satchel to hold the needed toilet articles. Let everything else
go in the trunk. A woman burdened with "big bundle, little bundle,
bandbox and umbrella," is a burden to herself and a terror to others.
Let the satchel contain a flask of some invigorating toilet
water--Florida, lavender or whatever is most refreshing, with a soft
sponge to bathe the face, hands and wrists, and thereby many a
headache can be warded off. If traveling in a sleeping coach, a larger
valise should be carried and ought to contain a pretty loose gown of
dark silk or wool to serve as a slumber robe, since clad in this one
may safely venture from berth to dressing-room without exciting
observation.
The rule for traveling dress is that there should be nothing about a
lady to attract attention, but this is relaxed in case of ladies
traveling a short distance for a brief visit, who are privileged to
wear the dress that suits their purpose.
Bridal Dress.
The conventional bridal dress is pure white, whether the material be
satin, silk or muslin. It may be made trained or walking length. If a
veil is worn the gown is cut _en train_. White satin slippers must be
worn and white gloves. Rip the fourth finger of the left-hand glove
ready for the ring; the maid of honor will turn this back at the
proper moment. Natural flowers are carried and a wreath is worn with a
veil. The veil should sweep to the edge of the train and may be simply
a cloud of sheerest tulle or filmy lace worth a king's ransom. It may
be worn over the face or not, as fancy dictates. Sometimes a white
leather or pearl bound prayer-book is carried instead of the bouquet.
This custom has the advantage of having the prayer-book as a memento
of the occasion, while the flowers wither. A young girl, known to the
writer, carried with her to the altar the same prayer-book that her
mother before her had carried on her wedding day.
The wedding dress, no matter what its material, must be cut high in
the neck and with long sleeves. This in deference to the fact that a
marriage is not simply a gala occasion, but the turning point for weal
or woe in the bride's life, and a solemn sacrament of the church, and
not to be celebrated in the garb of frivolity.
Where flowers are worn, orange blossoms are particularly appropriate,
though no German maiden would think of donning the bridal veil without
its attendant myrtle wreath. Any white flowers, however, are
appropriate.
Where jewels are worn the choice is absolutely confined to pearls and
diamonds (not in too great profusion). Instead of flowers, the veil is
sometimes fastened with a star or sunburst of diamonds.
Widows, no matter how youthful, are not privileged to wear the white
bridal robe, the veil, nor the orange blossoms. However, the most
exquisitely delicate tints may be chosen for their adornment.
If the marriage is private and the bride leaves immediately on her
wedding trip she can be married in her traveling suit. At other
private weddings, where no trip is taken, the bride usually wears a
pretty reception or visiting costume of silk or wool, choosing some
color that will be appropriate for after-wear.
The bride's mother, whether the wedding be at home or in church, wears
an elegant reception gown. Even if she be in deep mourning she lays
aside its sombre shades for this one hour. Invited guests should also
avoid mourning garb.
Bridemaid's Dress.
The bridemaids' dresses are often all of white, but frequently colors
are chosen, sometimes all alike; again, two by two of different hues.
The material of these gowns must be much less expensive than that of
the bride's. Their bouquets or baskets of flowers may be either white
or colored. They sometimes wear lovely picture hats with broad brims
and drooping plumes.
What Wedding Guests Wear.
If the wedding reception is held in the evening, full evening dress is
worn; reception gowns being suitable for the elder ladies. (See "Ball
Dress.") Where children are present, the girls are dressed in sheer
muslin or lace over silk slips, and adorned with fluttering ribbons.
The boys in fanciful costumes, such as pages' suits, etc. If it is a
morning reception, rich visiting or promenade costumes should be worn,
small dress bonnets and white gloves.
Ordinary Evening Dress.
This applies to small parties at home or with friends, to receiving
calls at home or in making an evening call. It should be appropriate
to the season. Pretty wool goods, exquisitely made, in winter;
organdies, grenadines and mulls for summer; laces, a modest bit of
jewelry or a simple flower, and one is sufficiently well-gowned.
If the gathering is a little more formal, reception dresses may be
worn by the matrons, while the young ladies garb themselves as for
receiving at an afternoon tea.
If gloves are worn at all on such an occasion they must be light
colored. They are really unnecessary, unless the taste of that
especial "set" is very strongly in their favor. If in doubt, it is
well to go furnished with a pair for use in case one finds all the
guests gloved, and has not the moral courage to remain the exception.
Dress for Church.
Well-bred people attend church in simple costumes, free from display.
These may be of rich materials, but they are quiet in color and make.
Jewelry, other than a simple pin, should not be used; earrings, of
course, if one is in the habit of wearing them, but not diamonds. The
church is not the place to flaunt elegant attire in the face of less
fortunate worshipers in the "I-am-richer-than-thou" style that marks
the _parvenu_.
Receiving Calls.
A lady with regular days for receiving calls wears a reception dress
as before described. Casual callers she receives in her morning or
afternoon house dress. Her morning dress, if she superintends her
household affairs, should be plain and neat, and be so protected by
cap and apron that by doffing these, she will be presentable in a
moment.
Where there are no household cares, a daintier morning dress may be
adopted, but let it be suitable to the occasion, not some old,
half-worn finery revamped for the occasion. If visiting, a still
richer gown may be worn, and for a late breakfast at a watering place
one may be quite luxurious.
Calling or Visiting Costume.
For morning calls dress quietly in promenade costume. Wear
light-colored gloves unless in deep mourning. If driving, carriage
dress may be worn. For day receptions the dress may be more elaborate
and the bonnet more "dressy."
By not carefully distinguishing between the gowns for different
occasions and over-dressing at all times, women lose all the
advantages of contrast in style. If lace and silk are worn
indiscriminately, what is there left for the full dress function?
Walking Dress.
This should be plain--tailor-made is the best--walking length, and of
good material. "Fussy" styles should not be chosen for street wear,
and the hat or bonnet should be rather plain and harmonize with the
gown.
Carriage Dress.
There is much more latitude for display permitted by the carriage
dress. Rich materials, elegant wraps, costly furs, are all allowable
here.
Coaching parties, too, have grown to be occasions for most gorgeous
costuming. Every hue of the rainbow is to be seen as the lofty
tally-ho rolls past, until, so great has become the license of color
and richness of material, that the "four hundred" are calling a halt,
and soberer tints are beginning to mark this amusement.
Do not wear too many fluttering ribbons, especially if occupying that
coveted position--the box seat. It does not add to the skill and
accuracy of the driver at a critical moment to have a fluttering
ribbon cut like a whip-lash across his eyes.
Dress for Lent.
This should be the sort of gown most appropriate and becoming to the
attitude of repentance. The gowns, of course, are simple, quiet
affairs. Symphonies in gray, poems in black and white, must, says one
writer, "reflect in their construction as well as color the soberness
of the event which they will grace. A train is always admissible for
the Lenten robe--that is, if it is for house wear. Otherwise the skirt
must be short--quite short enough, indeed, to give one's churchwomen a
glimpse of a dainty gray or black walking boot."
Any of the heliotrope, mauve or pansy shades, also, are appropriate
expressions of the sorrow of the fashionable woman, thus giving a
color scheme capable of the most exquisite effects. White cashmere is
well suited for the house; and very little draperies, but long,
straight lines, give the sought-after effect, and thus the dainty
chrysalis rests during the forty days that precede the unfolding of
the gorgeous wings of the Easter butterfly.
Dress for Riding.
The riding-habit should be made of broadcloth or some other suitable
cloth. The skirt should be weighted by sewing shot in the lower edge
of the left-hand breadths. Equestrian tights should be worn. The habit
is sometimes worn over another dress-skirt, when, in case of
dismounting or accident, the habit-skirt can be slipped off and the
rider still left properly attired.
Very long skirts are not worn. The habit should fit perfectly and
button to the throat. Linen collar, a pretty tie and linen cuffs are
worn, and a leather glove with gauntlet. The hat should be plain, and
of the prevailing fashion.
Lawn Parties.
The dress for these occasions has been already described; sufficient
here to say it should be light and graceful, and the bonnet or hat
ornamental and effective.
Picnics and Excursions.
Light-weight wool goods, or heavy cotton or linen material that will
wash and not tear easily, is most suitable for these occasions. Linen
or cotton duck is very serviceable.
Croquet, Archery, Skating, Etc.
All of these semi-athletic games call for bright, pretty costumes,
short enough to give the freedom of movement necessary to excel in the
game. For summer out-of-door games, pliable gloves should be worn, and
a hat to protect the eyes from the sun. For skating, rich, warm
materials, fur trimmings, fur caps, and warm, furred gauntlets should
be worn.
Bathing Dress.
Bathing calls for a costume of some material that will not cling to
the form when wet. Flannel is appropriate, and a heavy quantity of
mohair also makes a successful dress, as it resists water and has no
clinging qualities. An oil-silk cap should be worn over the hair. The
cut of the dress should be modest; the costume loose and full, and it
should be made with a skirt. The neck should be cut quite high.
Yachting Dress.
This is a pretty, nautically devised and ornamented suit, made of warm
materials and those that will stand sea water.
Dress for Gentlemen.
The subject of dress, while not so complex for a man as for a woman,
must still receive a certain amount of care at his hands, for no
gentleman can possess complete disregard of reigning styles without
thereby sacrificing a certain amount of dignity in the estimation of
his associates.
As far as the cardinal points of the toilet extend, a man is bound by
the same laws of exquisite neatness that are incumbent upon a woman.
The same care of teeth, finger-nails, hands and hair is necessary.
Don't neglect the small hairs that sometimes project from the nostrils
and the apertures of the ears. Use a small pair of scissors.
A gentleman will have spotless collars, cuffs and handkerchiefs,
irreproachable gloves, nicely blackened shoes and thoroughly brushed
clothes. Hair oil must never be used; it is ill-bred.
Clothes of plain colors are always in good taste, and so is pure white
linen. The fancy dotted and striped collars, cuffs and bosoms, so
often worn, are not as good taste.
Jewelry should be used very sparingly. Utility should be apparent in
the articles worn. Watch chain, sleeve buttons and studs (one or
three, as liked) are necessary. Where one stud is used, the stone,
though not conspicuous for size, should be a very fine one. A scarf
pin is sometimes worn, and one ring is allowable, but not too large or
showy. Don't use quantities of perfumery, it is very bad taste.
Keep a dressing-gown for use in the dressing-room or the sick-room. It
is not a proper garment for the table or the sitting-room.
Wear the hat properly and squarely upon the head. Wear a coat at all
proper times--in the sitting-room, drawing-room, and at table.
Lastly, a gentleman avoids all conspicuous styles of dress, and
confines himself to quiet colors and well-fitting, well-cared-for
garments.
Evening Dress for Gentlemen.
The evening dress for gentlemen varies very little from year to year,
and the time of wearing it varies not at all. From "dusk to dawn," in
other words, a gentleman wears a dress suit during the same hours that
a lady wears an evening dress.
Gentlemen's evening dress consists of black trousers, a low-cut black
or white vest, dress or "swallow-tail" coat, and white necktie. The
linen must be immaculate. A young man wears a standing collar; an
elderly man, if he choose, may wear his favorite style, with due
deference to the reigning style. One or three studs adorn the bosom.
Properly speaking, white or very light kid gloves are a part of
evening dress, but to say whether or not they shall be worn always at
a formal dinner is hardly safe. If worn, remove them at the table; but
at a ball they are indispensable. On all doubtful occasions it is well
to be provided with a pair, to use if wished.
Evening dress is to be worn at balls, large dinners, parties and the
opera. It is never worn at church, save in case of an evening
wedding. It is never worn anywhere on Sunday. In a small town a dress
suit on any occasion is apt to seem an affectation. Never wear a dress
suit anywhere before six o'clock in the evening.
"A gentleman never looks more thoroughly a gentleman than in an
evening dress," says one writer on etiquette, and it is well for those
to whom the occasion is liable to come to learn to wear one gracefully
and easily.
In France a dress suit is worn upon nearly all festive occasions. In
England the same customs prevail for its use as in our own country.
Morning Dress for Gentlemen.
Black cutaway, or Prince Albert coat (frock coat), black vest, white
in summer, light-colored trousers, silk or some other style of stiff
hat, and a black necktie. A light coat is never worn with black
trousers. This morning dress is worn at church, morning receptions,
informal parties, garden parties, when making calls, and at places of
amusement.
Wedding Dress for Gentlemen.
At morning weddings, that is, all weddings before six o'clock, the
gentlemen, bridegroom, best man, and all, wear morning dress with
light-colored ties. If gloves are worn, light-colored ones must be
selected. If there is a formal reception held in the evening, evening
dress and white or very pale gloves may then be worn. At an evening
wedding, evening dress is expected.
Gloves for Gentlemen.
Gentlemen wear gloves when walking, riding, or driving, at church and
all places of amusement, when making calls, and at receptions, balls
and evening parties. White or very pale tints for balls and weddings;
delicate tints for evening parties; any shade preferred for the other
occasions.
General Hints.
A silk hat should only be worn on appropriate occasions. Worn with a
rough business suit, or on a picnic or mountain ramble, it is in the
worst possible taste. It should appear only with frock coats, dress
coats and a fine quality of cloth.
Felt or straw hats should be worn with short coats or business suits.
The mourning weed, conventionally speaking, is worn only on a silk
hat; but there is no good reason why those who wish to wear mourning
for lost friends should always be in dress of ceremony so to do.
Diamonds should not be worn during business hours by men who are
obliged to stand behind counters or engage in any toil.
Business suits should never be worn to an evening party in the city,
though in small country gatherings they might be permissible.
Even various styles of outing suits are allowable in some of the
informal gatherings at summer resorts.
"Nice customs courtesy to great kings," or to occasions.
Evening Suit for Boys.
This is black cloth with the rough surface that is seen in the
material used for grown-up, evening clothes. His trousers are the
proper width and show a slight but not too pronounced crease. His
waistcoat is cut low, and over it he wears an Eton jacket of black
cloth that is accentuated by the deep white linen collar which turns
over it, and which is attached, like his cuffs, to his immaculate
white shirt.
He scorns all jewelry but a little watch and the white enamel buttons
that are in his shirt. His silk hat has a lower and a somewhat broader
crown than that made for an older gentleman.
A suit like this is worn by a boy from the time he is twelve until he
is eighteen, and then he is supposed to assume the regulation evening
dress worn by men.
_Letter Writing._
[Illustration]
"Letters are the memory of friendship," and are to be reckoned among
the chief links in the social chain that binds parent and child, lover
and sweetheart, friend and friend, in harmonious accord.
A letter may, from a business point of view, make or mar the fortunes
of its sender, while none the less surely, from a social standard,
will our epistles approve or condemn our claim for consideration.
Every position in life, and every occasion which may arise therein,
demand more or less exercise of our epistolary powers, and while but
few can hope for the grace, the wit, the repartee that sparkle in the
missives of a de Stael, a Recamier, a Walpole, a Macaulay, every one
can and should learn to write a clear, concise, intelligent,
appropriate letter.
A Rare Accomplishment.
To do this properly is a social accomplishment, and one of the
greatest boons that education confers. A graceful note, a kindly,
sparkling letter, are each the exponent of a true lady or gentleman,
though it must be confessed, since our country furnishes no so-called
"leisure class," the art of letter-writing has, in great measure,
fallen into feminine hands, the cares of business and professional
life ofttimes preventing the sterner half of creation from mere
friendly exercise of the pen. It is among women, therefore, that we
will find in the present, as we have found in the past, the best and
most fluent of correspondents.
A certain dread of letter-writing, however, seems to haunt a large
class of people. This dread, arising either from imperfect education,
a lack of practice or a fear of "nothing to say," can be overcome in
great measure by careful study of the few main requisites of the art,
as embraced in style, orthography, forms to be adopted and stationery
to be used for certain occasions.
The Style,
of course, is a subtle something inherent in each individual, not to
be entirely done away with in any case, but to be improved by a
careful study of good models, such, for example, as the letters of the
above mentioned authors. To read the best prose writers also cannot
fail to work an improvement. For instance, the writer once, after an
enthusiastic study of Taine, was rewarded by the assurance from a
literary correspondent that her letters were thoroughly "Tainesque" in
style.
By judicious reading and carefully taking thought, an abrupt style may
be softened and more graceful, flowing sentences substituted for its
short, sharp phrases; while a redundant style, by the same care, may
be pruned of its exuberance.
The chief charm of a letter consists in it being written naturally and
as one would talk. "We should write as we speak, and that's a true
familiar letter which expresseth a man's mind as if he were
discoursing with the party to whom he writes," says Howell, and,
ancient as the words are, no better advice can be given to-day.
Write easily, and never simply for effect; this gives a constrained,
stilted style that will soon cool the correspondence. Let your
thoughts flow as they would were you conversing with your friend, but
do not gossip; give friendly intelligence only when certain of its
truth. This will not seem too much when it is remembered how written
words sometimes rise up in judgment against their authors when the
spoken words would long since have been forgotten. A lapse of time
will brush the bloom from our sentences and nothing can bring back
again the tender grace that transfigured the over-sweetness of some
little written sentiment, or redeem it from the realm of the bombastic
in our eyes to-day. Then "let your communications be, not exactly 'yea
and nay,' but do let them be such that you would not fear to hear them
read aloud before you, for more than this 'cometh of evil.'"
[Illustration: "THESE ARE MY KEEPSAKES."]
Grammar and Orthography.
These should receive most careful attention. "A great author is one,"
according to Taine, "who, having passions, knows also his dictionary
and grammar." And a good letter-writer, as well, must "know his
dictionary and grammar" to render his missives presentable.
Grammatical errors are almost unpardonable, and a misspelled word is
an actual crime in these days of dictionaries. Punctuation and
capitalization, too, must be looked after, and the whole letter give
evidence of thought and care on the writer's part.