Printed for _S. E._ and Sold by _Langley Curtis_,
at the Sign of Sir _Edmondbury Godfrey_,
near _Fleetbridge_. 1682.
To the TORIES.
_Gentlemen_, for so you all write your selves; and indeed you are your
own Heralds, and Blazon all your Coats with _Honour_ and _Loyalty_ for
your _Supporters_; nay, and you are so unconscionable too in that point,
that you will allow neither of them in any other _Scutcheons_ but
your own. But who has 'em, or has 'em not, is not my present business;
onely as you profess your selves Gentlemen, to conjure you to give an
Adversary fair play; and that if any person whatsoever shall pretend
to be aggrieved by this POEM, or any part of it, that he would bear
it patiently; since the Licentiousness of the first _Absolom_ and
_Achitophel_ has been the sole occasion of the Liberty of This, I
having only taken the Measure of My Weapon, from the Length of his;
which by the Rules of Honour ought not to offend you; especially,
since the boldness of that Ingenious Piece, was wholly taken from the
Encouragement you gave the Author; and 'tis from that Boldness only that
this POEM takes its Birth: for had not his daring Pen brought that Piece
into the World, I had been so far from troubling my self in any Subject
on this kind, that I may justly say in one sence, the Writer of that
_Absolom_, is the Author of this. This favour, as in Justice due,
obtain'd from you, I shall not trouble you with a long Preface, like
a tedious Compliment at the Door, but desire you to look in for your
Entertainment. Onely I cannot forbear telling you, that one thing I
am a little concern'd for you, _Tories_, that your _Absoloms_ and
_Achitophels_, and the rest of your Grinning Satyres against the
_Whiggs_, have this one unpardonable Fault, That the Lash is more
against a _David_, than an _Achitophel_; whilst the running down of the
PLOT at so extravagant a rate, savours of very little less (pardon the
Expression) than ridiculing of Majesty it self, and turning all those
several Royal Speeches to the Parliament on that Subject, onely into
those double-tongu'd Oracles that sounded one thing, and meant another.
Besides, after this unmannerly Boldness, of not onely branding the
publick Justice of the Nation, but affronting even the Throne it self,
to push the humour a little farther, you run into ten times a greater
Vice, (and in the same strain too) than what you so severely inveigh
against: and whilst a POPISH PLOT through want of sufficient
Circumstances, and credible Witnesses, miscarries with you, a PROTESTANT
PLOT without either Witness or Circumstance at all, goes currant. Nay
you are so far now from your former niceties and scruples, and disparing
about raising of Armies, and not one Commission found, that you can
swallow the raising of a whole Protestant ARMY, without either
Commission, or Commission-Officer; Nay, the very When, Where, and How,
are no part of your Consideration. 'Tis true, the great Cry amongst you,
is, The Nations Eyes are open'd; but I am afraid, in most of you, 'tis
onely to look where you like best: and to help your lewd Eye-sight, you
have got a damnable trick of turning the Perspective upon occasion, and
magnifying or diminishing at pleasure. But alas, all talking to you is
but impertinent, and fending and proving signifie just nothing; for
after all Arguments, both Parties are so irreconcileable, that as the
Author of _Absolom_ wisely observed, they'll be Fools or Knaves to each
other to the end of the Chapter. And therefore I am so reasonable in
this point, that should be very glad to divide 'em between 'em, and give
the Fool to the _Tory_, and the Knave to the _Whigg_. For the _Tories_
that will believe no POPISH PLOT, may as justly come under that
denomination, as They, that _David_ tells us, _said in their Hearts
there was no God_. And then let the _Whiggs_ that do believe a _Popish
Plot_ be the Knaves, for daring to endeavour to hinder the Effects of a
_Popish Plot_, when the _Tories_ are resolved to the contrary. But to
draw near a conclusion, I have one favour more to beg of you, that
you'll give me the freedom of clapping but about a score of years
extraordinary on the back of my _Absolom_. Neither is it altogether so
unpardonable a Poetical License, since we find as great slips from the
Author of your own _Absolom_, where we see him bring in a _Zimri_ into
the Court of _David_, who in the Scripture-story dyed by the Hand of
_Phineas_ in the days of _Moses_. Nay, in the other extream, we find him
in another place talking of the Martyrdome of _Stephen_, so many Ages
after. And if so famous an Author can forget his own Rules of Unity,
Time, and Place, I hope you'll give a Minor Poet some grains of
Allowance, and he shall ever acknowledge himself
Your Humble Servant.
Absalom Senior:
or,