Long tam ago, when I’m de young feller, I’m work on de Fire Stashun.
I’m pompier on Depôt Nombre Tree on de Faubourg Quebec. I’m strong lak
a beef dose tam, and doant afraid of notting.
Well, perhaps I have fear for wan ting; yes, fer sure, I have much
afraid of de ole notaire Leblanc, not fer de raison dat he is more
strong as me,--no ba gosh, I’m ver sure I’m give it wan ponch she’s
die right away,--but I’m fear fer de raison dat she is de fadder of ma
belle petite Antoinette.
Ver well, I recollec wat Antoinette lok lak on dat tam. Bagosh I nevare
see de beauty wan lak it. Fer sure she is de bess wan I doan’t care;
juce lak wot you call hangel.
Dats twenty year ago. Now she is big as two hunner pound and he have
de gray hairs on its head; but she’s de good wan fer me an I can
recommember ver well when she is de little ting, belle comme une ange
an can mek de dance lak fairy girl.
I’m ver fond of dat little Antoinette fer sure, but de ole man Leblanc
she’s not lak me ver much. I’m only Pompier on Nombre Tree: an when one
tam she’s see me kiss it several tam de little Antoinette on de passage
she’s get so mad lak a bull, an trow me off on de house an tell me go
pass on de street an doan’t come back some more. An Antoinette she’s
cry lak baby.
Fer sure dats de bad affaire fer me.
I’m ver mad fer de ole man Leblanc, an I’m go on lovin dat little
Antoinette juce lak crazy mans. I can’t eat, I can’t slip, I can’t do
notting fer tink about dat little Antoinette.
After dat of course I see some tam de little Antoinette, on de sly, an
de more I’m see de more I’m crazy; an I tink she’s lak me purty well
too.
One time I speak fer mek de ronne away marriage, but she doan’t lek fer
do dat; she have only seventeen year an me I have twenty year.
But by me by I have de gran eeday fer finish up de hole affaire. I’m
work on de hook an ladder dat tam. I mek de bargaine wit de little
Antoinette fer little fire on its house so I can save its life juce fer
fun. Ba gosh I’m de most foolishness young feller on the whole Faubourg
Quebec, but de poor little Antoinette she doan’t fine dat foolish. She
tink dat’s de grande eeday an ver romantique.
Well, I fix hup de hole affaire an de night an de hour arrive fer de
fire on de house of de old Notaire Leblanc. Fer sure I’m ver excite dat
night. De hour come. Ten o’clocks.
I’m walkin up an down an walkin up an down an look de gong, and expec
effery minute she’s goin fer ring, gong! gong!! No ba gosh she doan’t
ring anny.
Five minute, ten minute, fifteen minute ronne away on de clock an den
I get ver quiet, ver tranquil, fer I tink someting have arreeve so she
can’t mek de fire.
Twenty minute pass, twenty-fy minute pass, haff pass ten an den, Oh mon
Dieu wot’s dat? De gong!! she’s sound bang! Dong! Dong, Dong, Dong,
Dong. Dat’s de nombre. Sapristi! I tink my hart’s goin fur burss wide
open.
I’m excite, I’m excite. Hurrah! hurrah!! de hors come out, de door fly
opeen, so slow, so slow. I nevare see de like before. I yell lak tiger
on de driver, “Lick de hors Alphonse, lick de horse.” I’m hole on de
side de hook an ladder an yell, an yell, an yell like hell. I tink we
nevare get dere, an, Saint Esprit! when we do get dere I wish we have
never get dere. Wot do I see? Mon Dieu! de hole house of de ole Notaire
Leblanc en feu, de flame high on de sky, de smoke so much you can see
notting; de crowd tick like fly, an yell, an yell.
Wot has arreeve dat night I can’t tell; only wan ting, wan ting, juce
de wan ting dats mek me mad, mek me crazy, mek me tiger, mek me devil.
Wot I’m care fer de house Leblanc? All I can hear is dat de poor little
Antoinette he is in de house. I rosh on de house, I doan’t hear some
ting, I doan’t see some ting, I doan’t feel some ting. Wot I’m do
I nevare can tell. I know only dat I fine de little Antoinette, my
Antoinette, perhaps ded an hang out de window on de top storee an no
way fer pass back de way I come. But de boys on de hook an ladder, dey
doan’t wait long; de ladder she’s dere so close I can touch wid one han.
I’m strong lak a beef dose tam, but when I tek de little Antoinette on
one harm an reach fer de ladder, hot lak a furnace, an swing masef an
de little Antoinette out de window I know den I’m strong, strong lak
twenty plow hors.
An den I know notting fer tree day, an when I’m ope de eye I’m in de
osspital an cover all over wit bandage; an de firs ting I see is de
little Antoinette sit dere on side ma bed an look me wid wet on his
eye--
Oh, bagosh!! I tell you dis little histoire, but you bet my life de ole
man Leblanc when he’s die she doan’t know yet why his house took on
fire. De fire fer joke is fer sure no joke, an de old man Leblanc she
doan’t like joke annyway.
[Illustration]
Buy not futures, whether of this world or the next.
* * * * *
Being a square plug, if thou findest thyself in a round hole, alter the
hole.