CHAPTER IV

1859-1868

Fleeming's marriage--His married life--Professional

difficulties--Life at Claygate--Illness of Mrs. F. Jenkin--and of

Fleeming--Appointment to the Chair at Edinburgh.

On Saturday, Feb. 26, 1859, profiting by a holiday of four days,

Fleeming was married to Miss Austin at Northiam; a place connected not

only with his own family but with that of his bride as well. By Tuesday

morning he was at work again, fitting out cableships at Birkenhead. Of

the walk from his lodgings to the works I find a graphic sketch in one

of his letters: "Out over the railway bridge, along a wide road raised

to the level of a ground floor above the land, which, not being built

upon, harbours puddles, ponds, pigs, and Irish hovels;--so to the dock

warehouses, four huge piles of building with no windows, surrounded by a

wall about twelve feet high;--in through the large gates, round which

hang twenty or thirty rusty Irish, playing pitch and toss and waiting

for employment;--on along the railway, which came in at the same gates,

and which branches down between each vast block--past a pilot-engine

butting refractory trucks into their places--on to the last block, [and]

down the branch, sniffing the guano-scented air, and detecting the old

bones. The hartshorn flavour of the guano becomes very strong, as I near

the docks, where, across the _Elba's_ decks, a huge vessel is

discharging her cargo of the brown dust, and where huge vessels have

been discharging that same cargo for the last five months." This was the

walk he took his young wife on the morrow of his return. She had been

used to the society of lawyers and civil servants, moving in that

circle which seems to itself the pivot of the nation, and is in truth

only a clique like another; and Fleeming was to her the nameless

assistant of a nameless firm of engineers, doing his inglorious

business, as she now saw for herself, among unsavoury surroundings. But

when their walk brought them within view of the river, she beheld a

sight to her of the most novel beauty: four great sea-going ships

dressed out with flags. "How lovely!" she cried. "What is it for?" "For

you," said Fleeming. Her surprise was only equalled by her pleasure. But

perhaps, for what we may call private fame, there is no life like that

of the engineer; who is a great man in out-of-the-way places, by the

dockside or on the desert island, or in populous ships, and remains

quite unheard of in the coteries of London. And Fleeming had already

made his mark among the few who had an opportunity of knowing him.

His marriage was the one decisive incident of his career; from that

moment until the day of his death he had one thought to which all the

rest were tributary, the thought of his wife. No one could know him even

slightly, and not remark the absorbing greatness of that sentiment; nor

can any picture of the man be drawn that does not in proportion dwell

upon it. This is a delicate task; but if we are to leave behind us (as

we wish) some presentment of the friend we have lost, it is a task that

must be undertaken.

For all his play of mind and fancy, for all his indulgence--and, as time

went on, he grew indulgent--Fleeming had views of duty that were even

stern. He was too shrewd a student of his fellow-men to remain long

content with rigid formulae of conduct. Iron-bound, impersonal ethics,

the procrustean bed of rules, he soon saw at their true value as the

deification of averages. "As to Miss (I declare I forget her name) being

bad," I find him writing, "people only mean that she has broken the

Decalogue--which is not at all the same thing. People who have kept in

the high road of Life really have less opportunity for taking a

comprehensive view of it than those who have leaped over the hedges and

strayed up the hills; not but what the hedges are very necessary, and

our stray travellers often have a weary time of it. So, you may say,

have those in the dusty roads." Yet he was himself a very stern

respecter of the hedgerows; sought safety and found dignity in the

obvious path of conduct; and would palter with no simple and recognised

duty of his epoch. Of marriage in particular, of the bond so formed, of

the obligations incurred, of the debt men owe to their children, he

conceived in a truly antique spirit; not to blame others, but to

constrain himself. It was not to blame, I repeat, that he held these

views; for others he could make a large allowance; and yet he tacitly

expected of his friends and his wife a high standard of behaviour. Nor

was it always easy to wear the armour of that ideal.

Acting upon these beliefs; conceiving that he had indeed "given himself"

(in the full meaning of these words) for better, for worse; painfully

alive to his defects of temper and deficiency in charm; resolute to make

up for these; thinking last of himself: Fleeming was in some ways the

very man to have made a noble, uphill fight of an unfortunate marriage.

In other ways, it is true, he was one of the most unfit for such a

trial. And it was his beautiful destiny to remain to the last hour the

same absolute and romantic lover, who had shown to his new bride the

flag-draped vessels in the Mersey. No fate is altogether easy; but

trials are our touchstone, trials overcome our reward; and it was given

to Fleeming to conquer. It was given to him to live for another, not as

a task, but till the end as an enchanting pleasure. "People may write

novels," he wrote in 1869, "and other people may write poems, but not a

man or woman among them can write to say how happy a man may be who is

desperately in love with his wife after ten years of marriage." And

again in 1885, after more than twenty-six years of marriage, and within

but five weeks of his death: "Your first letter from Bournemouth," he

wrote, "gives me heavenly pleasure--for which I thank Heaven and you

too--who are my heaven on earth." The mind hesitates whether to say that

such a man has been more good or more fortunate.

Any woman (it is the defect of her sex) comes sooner to the stable mind

of maturity than any man; and Jenkin was to the end of a most deliberate

growth. In the next chapter, when I come to deal with his telegraphic

voyages and give some taste of his correspondence, the reader will still

find him at twenty-five an arrant schoolboy. His wife besides was more

thoroughly educated than he. In many ways she was able to teach him, and

he proud to be taught; in many ways she outshone him, and he delighted

to be outshone. All these superiorities, and others that, after the

manner of lovers, he no doubt forged for himself, added as time went on

to the humility of his original love. Only once, in all I know of his

career, did he show a touch of smallness. He could not learn to sing

correctly; his wife told him so and desisted from her lessons; and the

mortification was so sharply felt that for years he could not be induced

to go to a concert, instanced himself as a typical man without an ear,

and never sang again. I tell it; for the fact that this stood singular

in his behaviour, and really amazed all who knew him, is the happiest

way I can imagine to commend the tenor of his simplicity; and because it

illustrates his feeling for his wife. Others were always welcome to

laugh at him; if it amused them, or if it amused him, he would proceed

undisturbed with his occupation, his vanity invulnerable. With his wife

it was different: his wife had laughed at his singing; and for twenty

years the fibre ached. Nothing, again, was more notable than the formal

chivalry of this unmannered man to the person on earth with whom he was

the most familiar. He was conscious of his own innate and often rasping

vivacity and roughness; and he was never forgetful of his first visit to

the Austins and the vow he had registered on his return. There was thus

an artificial element in his punctilio that at times might almost raise

a smile. But it stood on noble grounds; for this was how he sought to

shelter from his own petulance the woman who was to him the symbol of

the household and to the end the beloved of his youth.

I wish in this chapter to chronicle small beer; taking a hasty glance at

some ten years of married life and of professional struggle; and

reserving till the next all the more interesting matter of his cruises.

Of his achievements and their worth it is not for me to speak: his

friend and partner, Sir William Thomson, has contributed a note on the

subject, to which I must refer the reader.[24] He is to conceive in the

meanwhile for himself Fleeming's manifold engagements: his service on

the Committee on Electrical Standards, his lectures on electricity at

Chatham, his Chair at the London University, his partnership with Sir

William Thomson and Mr. Varley in many ingenious patents, his growing

credit with engineers and men of science; and he is to bear in mind that

of all this activity and acquist of reputation, the immediate profit was

scanty. Soon after his marriage, Fleeming had left the service of

Messrs. Liddell and Gordon, and entered into a general engineering

partnership with Mr. Forde, a gentleman in a good way of business. It

was a fortunate partnership in this, that the parties retained their

mutual respect unlessened and separated with regret; but men's affairs,

like men, have their times of sickness, and by one of those

unaccountable variations, for hard upon ten years the business was

disappointing and the profits meagre. "Inditing drafts of German

railways which will never get made": it is thus I find Fleeming, not

without a touch of bitterness, describe his occupation. Even the patents

hung fire at first. There was no salary to rely on; children were coming

and growing up; the prospect was often anxious. In the days of his

courtship, Fleeming had written to Miss Austin a dissuasive picture of

the trials of poverty, assuring her these were no figments but truly

bitter to support; he told her this, he wrote beforehand, so that when

the pinch came and she suffered, she should not be disappointed in

herself nor tempted to doubt her own magnanimity: a letter of admirable

wisdom and solicitude. But now that the trouble came, he bore it very

lightly. It was his principle, as he once prettily expressed it, "to

enjoy each day's happiness, as it arises, like birds or children." His

optimism, if driven out at the door, would come in again by the window;

if it found nothing but blackness in the present, would hit upon some

ground of consolation in the future or the past. And his courage and

energy were indefatigable. In the year 1863, soon after the birth of

their first son, they moved into a cottage at Claygate near Esher; and

about this time, under manifold troubles both of money and health, I

find him writing from abroad: "The country will give us, please God,

health and strength. I will love and cherish you more than ever, you

shall go where you wish, you shall receive whom you wish--and as for

money, you shall have that too. I cannot be mistaken. I have now

measured myself with many men. I do not feel weak, I do not feel that I

shall fail. In many things I have succeeded, and I will in this. And

meanwhile the time of waiting, which, please Heaven, shall not be long,

shall also not be so bitter. Well, well, I promise much, and do not know

at this moment how you and the dear child are. If he is but better,

courage, my girl, for I see light."

This cottage at Claygate stood just without the village, well surrounded

with trees, and commanding a pleasant view. A piece of the garden was

turfed over to form a croquet-green, and Fleeming became (I need scarce

say) a very ardent player. He grew ardent, too, in gardening. This he

took up at first to please his wife, having no natural inclination; but

he had no sooner set his hand to it than, like everything else he

touched, it became with him a passion. He budded roses, he potted

cuttings in the coach-house; if there came a change of weather at night

he would rise out of bed to protect his favourites; when he was thrown

with a dull companion, it was enough for him to discover in the man a

fellow-gardener; on his travels, he would go out of his way to visit

nurseries and gather hints; and to the end of his life, after other

occupations prevented him putting his own hand to the spade, he drew up

a yearly programme for his gardener, in which all details were

regulated. He had begun by this time to write. His paper on Darwin,

which had the merit of convincing on one point the philosopher himself,

had indeed been written before this, in London lodgings; but his pen was

not idle at Claygate; and it was here he wrote (among other things) that

review of "Fecundity, Fertility, Sterility, and Allied Topics," which

Dr. Matthews Duncan prefixed by way of introduction to the second

edition of the work. The mere act of writing seems to cheer the vanity

of the most incompetent; but a correction accepted by Darwin, and a

whole review borrowed and reprinted by Matthews Duncan, are compliments

of a rare strain, and to a man still unsuccessful must have been

precious indeed. There was yet a third of the same kind in store for

him; and when Munro himself owned that he had found instruction in the

paper on Lucretius, we may say that Fleeming had been crowned in the

Capitol of reviewing.

Croquet, charades, Christmas magic lanterns for the village children, an

amateur concert or a review article in the evening; plenty of hard work

by day; regular visits to meetings of the British Association, from one

of which I find him characteristically writing: "I cannot say that I

have had any amusement yet, but I am enjoying the dulness and dry bustle

of the whole thing"; occasional visits abroad on business, when he would

find the time to glean (as I have said) gardening hints for himself, and

old folk-songs or new fashions of dress for his wife; and the continual

study and care of his children: these were the chief elements of his

life. Nor were friends wanting. Captain and Mrs. Jenkin, Mr. and Mrs.

Austin, Clerk Maxwell, Miss Bell of Manchester, and others, came to them

on visits. Mr. Hertslet of the Foreign Office, his wife and his

daughter, were neighbours, and proved kind friends; in 1867 the Howitts

came to Claygate and sought the society of "the two bright, clever young

people";[25] and in a house close by Mr. Frederick Ricketts came to live

with his family. Mr. Ricketts was a valued friend during his short life;

and when he was lost, with every circumstance of heroism, in the _La

Plata_, Fleeming mourned him sincerely.

I think I shall give the best idea of Fleeming in this time of his early

married life, by a few sustained extracts from his letters to his wife,

while she was absent on a visit in 1864.

"_Nov. 11._--Sunday was too wet to walk to Isleworth, for which I was

sorry, so I stayed and went to church and thought of you at Ardwick

all through the Commandments, and heard Dr. ---- expound in a

remarkable way a prophecy of St. Paul about Roman Catholics, which,

_mutatis mutandis_, would do very well for Protestants in some parts.

Then I made a little nursery of borecole and Enfield market cabbage,

grubbing in wet earth with leggings and grey coat on. Then I tidied up

the coach-house to my own and Christine's admiration. Then encouraged

by _bouts-rimes_ I wrote you a copy of verses; high time, I think; I

shall just save my tenth year of knowing my lady love without inditing

poetry or rhymes to her.

"Then I rummaged over the box with my father's letters, and found

interesting notes from myself. One I should say my first letter, which

little Austin I should say would rejoice to see, and shall see--with a

drawing of a cottage and a spirited 'cob.' What was more to the

purpose, I found with it a paste-cutter which Mary begged humbly for

Christine, and I generously gave this morning.

"Then I read some of Congreve. There are admirable scenes in the

manner of Sheridan; all wit and no character, or rather one character

in a great variety of situations and scenes. I could show you some

scenes, but others are too coarse even for my stomach, hardened by a

course of French novels.

"All things look so happy for the rain.

"_Nov. 16._--Verbenas looking well.... I am but a poor creature

without you; I have naturally no spirit or fun or enterprise in me.

Only a kind of mechanical capacity for ascertaining whether two really

is half four, etc.; but when you are near me I can fancy that I too

shine, and vainly suppose it to be my proper light; whereas by my

extreme darkness when you are not by, it clearly can only be by a

reflected brilliance that I seem aught but dull. Then for the moral

part of me: if it were not for you and little Odden, I should feel by

no means sure that I had any affection power in me.... Even the

muscular me suffers a sad deterioration in your absence. I don't get

up when I ought to, I have snoozed in my chair after dinner; I do not

go in at the garden with my wonted vigour, and feel ten times as tired

as usual with a walk in your absence; so you see, when you are not by,

I am a person without ability, affections, or vigour, but droop, dull,

selfish, and spiritless; can you wonder that I love you?

"_Nov. 17._--... I am very glad we married young. I would not have

missed these five years--no, not for any hopes; they are my own.

"_Nov. 30._--I got through my Chatham lecture very fairly, though

almost all my apparatus went astray. I dined at the mess, and got home

to Isleworth the same evening; your father very kindly sitting up for

me.

"_Dec. 1._--Back at dear Claygate. Many cuttings flourish, especially

those which do honour to your hand. Your Californian annuals are up

and about. Badger is fat, the grass green....

"_Dec. 3._--Odden will not talk of you, while you are away, having

inherited, as I suspect, his father's way of declining to consider a

subject which is painful, as your absence is.... I certainly should

like to learn Greek, and I think it would be a capital pastime for the

long winter evenings.... How things are misrated! I declare croquet is

a noble occupation compared to the pursuits of business men. As for

so-called idleness--that is, one form of it--I vow it is the noblest

aim of man. When idle, one can love, one can be good, feel kindly to

all, devote oneself to others, be thankful for existence, educate

one's mind, one's heart, one's body. When busy, as I am busy now or

have been busy to-day, one feels just as you sometimes felt when you

were too busy, owing to want of servants.

"_Dec. 5._--On Sunday I was at Isleworth, chiefly engaged in playing

with Odden. We had the most enchanting walk together through the

brickfields. It was very muddy, and, as he remarked, not fit for

Nanna, but fit for us _men_. The dreary waste of bared earth, thatched

sheds and standing water was a paradise to him; and when we walked up

planks to deserted mixing and crushing mills, and actually saw where

the clay was stirred with long iron prongs, and chalk or lime ground

with 'a tind of a mill,' his expression of contentment and triumphant

heroism knew no limit to its beauty. Of course on returning I found

Mrs. Austin looking out at the door in an anxious manner, and thinking

we had been out quite long enough.... I am reading Don Quixote

chiefly, and am his fervent admirer, but I am so sorry he did not

place his affections on a Dulcinea of somewhat worthier stamp. In fact

I think there must be a mistake about it. Don Quixote might and would

serve his lady in most preposterous fashion, but I am sure he would

have chosen a lady of merit. He imagined her to be such, no doubt,

and drew a charming picture of her occupations by the banks of the

river; but in his other imaginations there was some kind of peg on

which to hang the false costumes he created; windmills are big, and

wave their arms like giants; sheep in the distance are somewhat like

an army; a little boat on the river-side must look much the same

whether enchanted or belonging to millers; but except that Dulcinea is

a woman, she bears no resemblance at all to the damsel of his

imagination."

At the time of these letters the oldest son only was born to them. In

September of the next year, with the birth of the second, Charles

Frewen, there befell Fleeming a terrible alarm, and what proved to be a

lifelong misfortune. Mrs. Jenkin was taken suddenly and alarmingly ill;

Fleeming ran a matter of two miles to fetch the doctor, and, drenched

with sweat as he was, returned with him at once in an open gig. On their

arrival at the house, Mrs. Jenkin half unconsciously took and kept hold

of her husband's hand. By the doctor's orders, windows and doors were

set open to create a thorough draught, and the patient was on no account

to be disturbed. Thus, then, did Fleeming pass the whole of that night,

crouching on the floor in the draught, and not daring to move lest he

should wake the sleeper. He had never been strong; energy had stood him

in stead of vigour; and the result of that night's exposure was flying

rheumatism varied with settled sciatica. Sometimes it quite disabled

him, sometimes it was less acute; but he was rarely free from it until

his death. I knew him for many years; for more than ten we were closely

intimate; I have lived with him for weeks; and during all this time he

only once referred to his infirmity, and then perforce, as an excuse for

some trouble he put me to, and so slightly worded that I paid no heed.

This is a good measure of his courage under sufferings of which none but

the untried will think lightly. And I think it worth noting how this

optimist was acquainted with pain. It will seem strange only to the

superficial. The disease of pessimism springs never from real troubles,

which it braces men to bear, which it delights men to bear well. Nor

does it readily spring at all, in minds that have conceived of life as

a field of ordered duties, not as a chase in which to hunt for

gratifications. "We are not here to be happy, but to be good"; I wish he

had mended the phrase: "We are not here to be happy, but to try to be

good," comes nearer the modesty of truth. With such old-fashioned

morality it is possible to get through life, and see the worst of it,

and feel some of the worst of it, and still acquiesce piously and even

gladly in man's fate. Feel some of the worst of it, I say; for some of

the rest of the worst is, by this simple faith, excluded.

It was in the year 1868 that the clouds finally rose. The business in

partnership with Mr. Forde began suddenly to pay well; about the same

time the patents showed themselves a valuable property; and but a little

after, Fleeming was appointed to the new Chair of Engineering in the

University of Edinburgh. Thus, almost at once, pecuniary embarrassments

passed for ever out of his life. Here is his own epilogue to the time at

Claygate, and his anticipations of the future in Edinburgh:--

"... The dear old house at Claygate is not let, and the pretty garden

a mass of weeds. I feel rather as if we had behaved unkindly to them.

We were very happy there, but now that it is over I am conscious of

the weight of anxiety as to money which I bore all the time. With you

in the garden, with Austin in the coach-house, with pretty songs in

the little low white room, with the moonlight in the dear room

upstairs,--ah, it was perfect; but the long walk, wondering,

pondering, fearing, scheming, and the dusty jolting railway, and the

horrid fusty office with its endless disappointments, they are well

gone. It is well enough to fight and scheme, and bustle about in the

eager crowd here [in London] for a while now and then, but not for a

lifetime. What I have now is just perfect. Study for winter, action

for summer, lovely country for recreation, a pleasant town for

talk...."

FOOTNOTES:

[24] The note by Lord Kelvin, appended in 1887 to the original edition

of this Memoir, is not included in the present edition.--ED.

[25] "Reminiscences of My Later Life," by Mary Howitt, _Good Words_,

May 1886.

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