Little as I was satisfied with these two letters, I knew that I should
not be able to improve upon them, however much I might try to do so.
The fault was that I could not be explicit; and that would be apparent
to myself if not to the others, however elegantly my sentences might be
turned.
I put the letters aside until they should be required, and then lay
down for a few hours' rest. Thank God it _was_ rest! I fell into a
deep dreamless sleep, and only awoke when Becky came to call me in the
morning. There was still the same expression in her face, half sorrow,
half pity, as though she saw cause for both as she looked at me.
'Now, Becky, you must not look at me in that way, to begin with. I am
going to depend a great deal upon you, and it will not do to let your
face tell all you are thinking about, as it is doing now.'
'I can't help it shewing, because---- O Miss Haddon, dear, I know you
are not so happy as you pretend to be--I know it! And it's ever so
much worse to see you look like that, than as if you were crying and
sobbing!'