the water, which they dailie occupie; and soile through which it
passeth, for all waters are not of like goodnesse, sith the fattest
standing water is alwaies the best: for although the waters that run
by chalke or cledgie soiles be good, and next vnto the Thames water
which is the most excellent, yet the water that standeth in either of
these is the best for vs that dwell in the countrie, as whereon the
sunne lieth longest, and fattest fish is bred. But of all other the
fennie and morish is the worst, and the cléerest spring water next
vnto it. In this busines therfore the skilfull workeman dooth redeeme
the iniquitie of that element, by changing of his proportions, which
trouble in ale (sometime our onelie, but now taken with manie for old
and sickmens drinke) is neuer séene nor heard of. Howbeit as the beere
well sodden in the bruing, and stale, is cleere and well coloured as
muscadell or malueseie, or rather yellow as the gold noble as our
potknights call it: so our ale which is not at all or verie little
sodden, and without hops, is more thicke, fulsome, and of no such
continuance, which are thrée notable things to be considered in that
liquor. But what for that? Certes I know some aleknights so much
addicted therevnto, that they will not ceasse from morow vntill euen
to visit the same, clensing house after house, till they defile
themselues, and either fall quite vnder the boord, or else not daring
to stirre from their stooles, sit still pinking with their narrow eies
as halfe sleeping, till the fume of their aduersarie be digested that
he may go to it afresh. Such flights also haue the alewiues for the
vtterance of this drinke, that they will mixe it with rosen and salt:
but if you heat a knife red hot, and quench it in the ale so neere the
bottome of the pot as you can put it, you shall sée the rosen come
foorth hanging on the knife. As for the force of salt, it is well
knowne by the effect, for the more the drinker tipleth, the more he
may, and so dooth he carrie off a drie dronken noll to bed with him,
except his lucke be the better. But to my purpose.
In some places of England, there is a kind of drinke made of apples,
[Sidenote: Cider.]
[Sidenote: Perrie.]
which they call cider or pomage, but that of peares is named pirrie,
and both are groond and pressed in presses made for the nonce. Certes
these two are verie common in Sussex, Kent, Worcester, and other
stéeds, where these sorts of fruits doo abound, howbeit they are not
their onelie drinke at all times, but referred vnto the delicate sorts
[Sidenote: Metheglin.]
of drinke, as metheglin is in Wales, whereof the Welshmen make no
lesse accompt (and not without cause if it be well handled) than the
Gréekes did of their Ambrosia or Nectar, which for the pleasantnesse
thereof, was supposed to be such as the gods themselues did delite in.
There is a kind of swish swash made also in Essex, and diuerse other
places, with honicombs and water, which the homelie countrie wiues,
[Sidenote: Mead.]
putting some pepper and a little other spice among, call mead, verie
good in mine opinion for such as loue to be loose bodied at large, or
a little eased of the cough, otherwise it differeth so much fr[=o] the
true metheglin, as chalke from cheese. Truelie it is nothing else but
the washing of the combes, when the honie is wroong out, and one of
the best things that I know belonging thereto is, that they spend but
[Sidenote: Hydromel.]
little labour and lesse cost in making of the same, and therefore no
great losse if it were neuer occupied. Hitherto of the diet of my
countrimen, & somewhat more at large peraduenture than manie men will
like of, wherefore I thinke good now to finish this tractation, and so
will I, when I haue added a few other things incident vnto that which
goeth before, whereby the whole processe of the same shall fullie be
deliuered, & my promise to my fréend in this behalfe performed.
[Sidenote: Lesse time spent in eating than heretofore.]
Heretofore there hath béene much more time spent in eating and
drinking than commonlie is in these daies, for whereas of old we had
breakefasts in the forenoone, beuerages, or nuntions after dinner, and
thereto reare suppers generallie when it was time to go to rest (a
toie brought into England by hardie Canutus and a custome whereof
Athenæus also speaketh lib. 1, albeit Hippocrates speake but of twise
at the most lib. 2. De rat. vict. in feb. ac.) Now these od repasts
thanked be God are verie well left, and ech one in maner (except here
and there some yoong hungrie stomach that cannot fast till dinner
time) contenteth himselfe with dinner & supper onelie. The Normans
misliking the gormandise of Canutus, ordeined after their arriuall,
that no table should be couered aboue once in the daie, which
Huntingdon imputeth to their auarice: but in the end either waxing
wearie of their owne frugalitie, or suffering the cockle of old
custome to ouergrow the good corne of their new constitution, they
[Sidenote: Canutus a glutton, but the Normans at the last
excéeded him in that vice.]
fell to such libertie, that in often féeding they surmounted Canutus
surnamed the hardie. For whereas he couered his table but thrée or
foure times in the daie, these spred their clothes fiue or six times,
and in such wise as I before rehearsed. They brought in also the
custome of long and statelie sitting at meat, whereby their feasts
resembled those ancient pontificall bankets whereof Macrobius speaketh
lib. 3. cap. 13. and Plin. lib. 10. cap. 10. and which for
sumptuousnesse of fare, long sitting and curiositie shewed in the
same, excéeded all other mens feasting, which fondnesse is not yet
left with vs, notwithstanding that it proueth verie beneficiall for
the physicians, who most abound, where most excesse and misgouernement
of our bodies doo appéere, although it be a great expense of time, and
worthie of reprehension. For the nobilitie, gentlemen, and
[Sidenote: Long sitting reprehended.]
merchantmen, especiallie at great méetings doo sit commonlie till two
or three of the clocke at afternoone, so that with manie is an hard
matter, to rise from the table to go to euening praier, and returne
from thence to come time inough to supper. For my part I am persuaded
that the purpose of the Normans at the first was to reduce the ancient
Roman order or Danish custome in féeding once in the daie, and toward
the euening, as I haue red and noted. And indéed the Romans had such a
custome, and likewise the Grecians, as may appeere by the words of
Socrates, who said vnto the Atheniens, "Oriente sole consilium,
occidente conuiuium est cogitandum," although a little something was
allowed in the morning to yoong children which we now call a
breakefast. Plato called the Siciliens monsters, for that they vsed to
eat twise in the daie. Among the Persians onelie the king dined when
the sunne was at the highest, and shadow of the stile at the shortest:
the rest (as it is reported) went alwaies but once to meat when their
stomachs craued it, as the Canariens and Indians doo in my time (who
if appetite serue refuse not to go to meat at anie houre of the night)
and likewise the ancient Caspians. Yet Arhianus noteth it as a rare
thing li. 4. cap. 16. that the Tyrhenians had taken vp an ill custome
to féed twise in a daie. Howbeit at the last they fell generallie to
allow of suppers toward the setting of the sunne in all places,
bicause they would haue their whole familie to go to meat togither,
and wherevnto they would appoint their guests to come at a certeine
length of the shadow, to be perceiued in their dials. And this is more
to be noted of antiquitie, that if anie man (as Plutarch saith) did
féed before that time, he incurred a note of reprehension as if he had
beene gluttonous and giuen vnto the bellie, 8. Sympos. 6. Their slaues
in like sort were glad, when it grew to the tenth foot, for then were
they sure soone after to go to meat. In the scripture we read of manie
suppers & few dinners, onelie for that dining was not greatlie vsed in
Christs time, but taken as a thing latelie sproong vp, when pampering
of the bellie began to take hold, occasioned by idlenes and great
abundance of riches. It is pretie to note in Iuuenal, how he taunteth
[Sidenote: * That is at thrée of the clocke at afternoone.]
Marius for that he gaue himselfe to drinke before the [*]ninth houre
of the daie: for thinking three houres to be too little for the
filling of his bellie, he began commonlie at eight, which was an houre
too soone. Afterwards when gurmandise increased yet more amongst the
Romans, and from them was dispersed vnto all nations vnder their
subiection, it came to passe that six houres onlie were appointed to
worke and consult in, and the other six of the daie to feed and drinke
in, as the verse saith:
Sex horæ tantùm rebus tribuantur agendis,
Viuere post illas, littera Zetha monet.
Wherevnto Maximus Planudes (except my memorie faile me) addeth this
scholie after his maner, saieng that from morning vnto noone (which is
six of the clocke after the vnequall accompt) each one dooth trauell
about his necessarie affaires, that being doone, he betaketh himselfe
to the refreshing of his bodie, which is noted and set downe by the
Gréeke letters of the diall (wherewith the Romane horologies were
marked, as ours be with their numerall letters) whereby the time is
described; for those which point 7, 8, 9 and 10 are written with
[Greek: x ê th i] and being ioined yéeld [Greek: xêthi], which in
English signified so much as liue, as if they should meane, eat that
thou maist liue. But how Martial diuided his daie, and with him the
whole troope of the learned & wiser sort, these verses following doo
more euidentlie declare:
[Sidenote: Li. 4. epig. 8.]
Prima salutantes, atque altera continet horas,
Exercet raucos tertia causidicos.
In quintam varios extendit Roma labores,
Sexta quies lassis, septima finis erit.
Sufficit in nonam nitidis octaua palestris,
Imperat extructos frangere nona thoros.
Hora libellorum decima est Eupheme meorum,
Temperat Ambrosias cum tua cura dapes.
Et bonus æthereo laxatur Nectare Cæsar,
Ingentíque tenet pocula parca manu.
Tunc admitte iocos: gressu timet ire licenti,
Ad matutinum nostra Thaleia Iouem.
Thus we sée how the ancient maner of the Gentils was to féed but once
in the daie, and that toward night, till gluttonie grew on and altered
this good custome. I might here remember also their maner in pulling
off their shooes when they sat downe to meat, whereof Martial saith:
Deposui soleas, affertur protinus ingens
Inter lactucas oxygarmúq; liber, &c.
And Tullie also remembreth where he saith Seruum à pedibus ad te misi,
which office grew of the said custome, as Seruus ad limina did of
kéeping the doore, though in most houses both these were commonlie one
mans office, also Ad pocula of attending on the cup. But bicause the
good writers of our time haue obserued these phrases and such like
with their causes and descriptions, in their infinite and seuerall
treatises, I shall not need to discourse anie farther vpon them. With
vs the nobilitie, gentrie, and students, doo ordinarilie go to dinner
at eleuen before noone, and to supper at fiue, or betweene fiue and
six at afternoone. The merchants dine and sup seldome before twelue at
noone, and six at night especiallie in London. The husbandmen dine
also at high noone as they call it, and sup at seuen or eight: but out
of the tearme in our vniuersities the scholers dine at ten. As for the
poorest sort they generallie dine and sup when they may, so that to
talke of their order of repast, it were but a néedlesse matter. I
might here take occasion also to set downe the varietie vsed by
antiquitie in their beginnings of their diets, wherin almost euerie
nation had a seuerall fashion, some beginning of custome (as we doo in
summer time) with salets at supper, and some ending with lettice, some
making their entrie with egs, and shutting vp their tables with
mulberies, as we doo with fruit and conceits of all sorts. Diuerse (as
the old Romans) began with a few crops of rue, as the Venetians did
with the fish called Gobius, the Belgies with butter (or as we doo yet
also) with butter and egs vpon fish daies. But whereas we commonlie
begin with the most grosse food, and end with the most delicate, the
Scot thinking much to leaue the best for his meniall seruants maketh
his entrance at the best, so that he is sure therby to leaue the
worst. We vse also our wines by degrees, so that the hotest commeth
last to the table, but to stand vpon such toies would spend much time,
and turne to small profit, wherfore I will deale with other things
more necessarie for this turne.
OF THEIR APPARELL AND ATTIRE.
CHAP. VII.
An Englishman, indeuoring sometime to write of our attire, made
sundrie platformes for his purpose, supposing by some of them to find
out one stedfast ground whereon to build the summe of his discourse.
But in the end (like an oratour long without exercise) when he saw
what a difficult péece of worke he had taken in hand, he gaue ouer his
trauell, and onelie drue the picture of a naked man, vnto whome he
gaue a paire of sheares in the one hand, and a peece of cloth in the
other, to the end he should shape his apparell after such fashion as
himselfe liked, sith he could find no kind of garment that could
please him anie while togither, and this he called an Englishman.
[Sidenote: Andrew Beerd.]
Certes this writer (otherwise being a lewd popish hypocrite and
vngratious priest) shewed himselfe herein not to be altogether void of
iudgement, sith the phantasticall follie of our nation, euen from the
courtier to the carter is such, that no forme of apparell liketh vs
longer than the first garment is in the wearing, if it continue so
long and be not laid aside, to receiue some other trinket newlie
deuised by the fickle headed tailors, who couet to haue seuerall
trickes in cutting, thereby to draw fond customers to more expense of
monie. For my part I can tell better how to inueigh against this
[Sidenote: Strange cuts.]
enormitie, than describe anie certeintie of our attire: sithence such
is our mutabilitie, that to daie there is none to the Spanish guise,
to morrow the French toies are most fine and delectable, yer long no
such apparell as that which is after the high Alman fashion, by and by
the Turkish maner is generallie best liked of, otherwise the Morisco
gowns, the Barbarian sléeues, the mandilion worne to Collie weston
ward, and the short French breches make such a comelie vesture, that
except it were a dog in a doublet, you shall not sée anie so
disguised, as are my countrie men of England. And as these fashions
are diuerse, so likewise it is a world to see the costlinesse and the
curiositie: the excesse and the vanitie: the pompe and the brauerie:
the change and the varietie: and finallie the ficklenesse and the
follie that is in all degrees: in somuch that nothing is more constant
[Sidenote: Much cost vpon the bodie, and little vpon the soule.]
in England than inconstancie of attire. Oh how much cost is bestowed
now adaies vpon our bodies and how little vpon our soules! how manie
sutes of apparell hath the one and how little furniture hath the
other? how long time is asked in decking vp of the first, and how
little space left wherin to féed the later? how curious, how nice also
are a number of men and women, and how hardlie can the tailor please
them in making it fit for their bodies? how manie times must it be
sent backe againe to him that made it? what chafing, what fretting,
what reprochfull language doth the poore workeman beare awaie? and
manie times when he dooth nothing to it at all, yet when it is brought
home againe it is verie fit and handsome; then must we put it on, then
must the long seames of our hose be set by a plumb-line, then we
puffe, then we blow, and finallie sweat till we drop, that our clothes
may stand well vpon vs. I will saie nothing of our heads, which
sometimes are polled, sometimes curled, or suffered to grow at length
like womans lockes, manie times cut off aboue or vnder the eares round
as by a woodden dish. Neither will I meddle with our varietie of
[Sidenote: Beards.]
beards, of which some are shauen from the chin like those of Turks,
not a few cut short like to the beard of marques Otto, some made round
like a rubbing brush, other with a pique de vant (O fine fashion!) or
now and then suffered to grow long, the barbers being growen to be so
cunning in this behalfe as the tailors. And therefore if a man haue a
leane and streight face, a marquesse Ottons cut will make it broad and
large; if it be platter like, a long slender beard will make it séeme
the narrower; if he be wesell becked, then much heare left on the
chéekes will make the owner looke big like a bowdled hen, and so grim
as a goose, if Cornelis of Chelmeresford saie true: manie old men doo
weare no beards at all. Some lustie courtiers also and gentlemen of
courage, doo weare either rings of gold, stones, or pearle in their
eares, whereby they imagine the workemanship of God not to be a little
amended. But herein they rather disgrace than adorne their persons, as
by their nicenesse in apparell, for which I saie most nations doo not
vniustlie deride vs, as also for that we doo séeme to imitate all
nations round about vs, wherein we be like to the Polypus or
Chameleon; and therevnto bestow most cost vpon our arses, & much more
than vpon all the rest of our bodies, as women doo likewise vpon their
[Sidenote: Excesse in women.]
heads and shoulders. In women also it is most to be lamented, that
they doo now farre excéed the lightnesse of our men (who neuerthelesse
are transformed from the cap euen to the verie shoo) and such staring
attire as in time past was supposed méet for none but light housewiues
onelie, is now become an habit for chast and sober matrones. What
should I saie of their doublets with pendant codpéeses on the brest
full of iags & cuts, and sléeues of sundrie colours? their
galligascons to beare out their bums & make their attire to sit plum
round (as they terme it) about them? their fardingals, and diuerslie
coloured nether stocks of silke, ierdseie, and such like, whereby
their bodies are rather deformed than commended? I haue met with some
of these trulles in London so disguised, that it hath passed my skill
to discerne whether they were men or women.
Thus it is now come to passe, that women are become men, and men
transformed into monsters: and those good gifts which almightie God
hath giuen vnto vs to reléeue our necessities withall (as a nation
turning altogither the grace of God into wantonnesse, for
Luxuriant animi rebus plerunque secundis)
not otherwise bestowed than in all excesse, as if we wist not
otherwise how to consume and wast them. I praie God that in this
behalfe our sinne be not like vnto that of Sodoma and Gomorha, whose
[Sidenote: Ezech. 16.]
errors were pride, excesse of diet, and abuse of Gods benefits
aboundantlie bestowed vpon them, beside want of charitie toward the
poore, and certeine other points which the prophet shutteth vp in
silence. Certes the common-wealth cannot be said to florish where
these abuses reigne, but is rather oppressed by vnreasonable exactions
made vpon rich farmers, and of poore tenants, wherewith to mainteine
the same. Neither was it euer merier with England, than when an
Englishman was knowne abroad by his owne cloth, and contented himselfe
at home with his fine carsie hosen, and a meane slop: his coat, gowne,
and cloake of browne blue or puke, with some pretie furniture of
veluet or furre, and a doublet of sad tawnie, or blacke veluet, or
other comelie silke, without such cuts and gawrish colours as are
worne in these daies, and neuer brought in but by the consent of the
French, who thinke themselues the gaiest men, when they haue most
diuersities of iagges and change of colours about them. Certes of all
[Sidenote: Attire of merchants.]
estates our merchants doo least alter their attire, and therefore are
most to be commended: for albeit that which they weare be verie fine
and costlie, yet in forme and colour it representeth a great péece of
the ancient grauitie apperteining to citizens and burgesses, albeit
the yoonger sort of their wiues both in attire and costlie
housekeeping can not tell when and how to make an end, as being women
in déed in whome all kind of curiositie is to be found and seene, and
in farre greater measure than in women of higher calling. I might here
name a sort of hewes deuised for the nonce, wherewith to please
phantasticall heads, as gooseturd gréene, pease porridge tawnie,
popingaie blue, lustie gallant, the diuell in the head (I should saie
the hedge) and such like: but I passe them ouer thinking it sufficient
to haue said thus much of apparell generallie, when nothing can
particularlie be spoken of anie constancie thereof.
OF THE HIGH COURT OF PARLEMENT, AND AUTHORITIE OF THE SAME.
CHAP. VIII.