lose der human shape an' den He swunk 'em up ontwel dey 'z no bigger'n
dey is now, dat 'uz ter show 'em how no-kyount dey wuz in His sight. Den
bekase dey thought derse'fs too good ter walk 'pun de bare groun' He
sont 'em ter live un'need hit, whar dey hatter dig an' scratch der way
'long. Las' uv all He tuck an' tuck 'way der eyes an' made 'em blin',
dat's 'kase dey done 'spise ter look at der feller creeturs. But He feel
kind er saw'y fer 'em w'en He git dat fur, an' He ain' wanter punish 'em
too haivy, so He lef 'em dese silk clo'es whar I done tol' you 'bout,
an' dese han's whar you kin see fer yo'se'fs is human, an' I reckon bofe
dem things putt 'em in min' er w'at dey useter be an' rack 'em 'umble.
Uver sence den de moleses bin gwine 'long un'need de groun', 'cordin ter
de jedgmen' er de Lawd, an' diggin' an' scratchin' der way thu de worl',
in trial an' tribilashun, wid dem po' li'l human han'ses. An' dat orter
l'arn you w'at comes er folks 'spisin' der feller creeturs, an' I want
y'all ter 'member dat nex' time I year you call dem Thompson chillen
'trash.'"
"I'd like to know what use moles are," said Ned, who was of rather an
investigating turn of mind; "they just go round rooting through the
ground spoiling people's gardens, and I don't see what they're good for;
you can't eat them or use them any way."
"Sho', chil'!" said Aunt Nancy, "you dunno w'at you talkin' 'bout; de
Lawd have some use fer ev'y creetur He done mek. Dey tells me dat de
moleses eats up lots er bugs an' wu'ms an' sech ez dat, dat mought hurt
de craps ef dey wuz let ter live. Sidesen dat, jes' gimme one'r de claws
er dat mole, an' lemme hang hit roun' de neck uv a baby whar cuttin' his
toofs, an' I boun' you, ev'y toof in his jaws gwine come bustin' thu his
goms widout nair' a ache er a pain ter let him know dey's dar. Don't
talk ter me 'bout de moleses bein' wufless! I done walk de flo' too much
wid cryin' babies not ter know de use er moleses."
"You don't really believe that, do you?" asked Ned.
"B'lieve hit!" she answered indignantly; "I don' _b'lieve_ hit, I
_knows_ hit. I done tol' you all de things a hyar's foot kin do; w'ats
de reason a mole's foot ain' good fer sump'n, too? Ef folks on'y knowed
mo' about sech kyores ez dat dar neenter be so much sickness an' mis'ry
in de worl'. I done kyored myse'f er de rheumatiz in my right arm jes'
by tyin' a eel-skin roun' hit, an' ev'yb'dy on dis plantation knows dat
ef you'll wrop a chil's hya'r wid eel-skin strings hit's boun' ter mek
hit grow. Ef you want de chil' hisse'f ter grow an' ter walk soon you
mus' bresh his feet wid de broom. I oon tell you dis ef I hadn't tried
'em myse'f. You mus'n' talk so biggitty 'bout w'at you dunno nuttin' 't
all about. You come f'um up Norf yonner, an' mebbe dese things don' wu'k
de same dar ez w'at dey does down yer whar we bin 'pendin' on 'em so
long."
A PSALM OF LIFE
BY PHOEBE CARY
Tell me not, in idle jingle,
Marriage is an empty dream,
For the girl is dead that's single,
And things are not what they seem.
Married life is real, earnest,
Single blessedness a fib,
Taken from man, to man returnest,
Has been spoken of the rib.
Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Nearer brings the wedding-day.
Life is long, and youth is fleeting,
And our hearts, if there we search,
Still like steady drums are beating
Anxious marches to the Church.
In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle;
Be a woman, be a wife!
Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act--act in the living Present.
Heart within, and Man ahead!
Lives of married folks remind us
We can live our lives as well,
And, departing, leave behind us;--
Such examples as will tell;--
Such examples, that another,
Sailing far from Hymen's port,
A forlorn, unmarried brother,
Seeing, shall take heart, and court.
Let us then be up and doing,
With the heart and head begin;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor, and to win!
AN ODYSSEY OF K'S
BY WILBUR D. NESBIT
I've traveled up and down this land
And crossed it in a hundred ways,
But somehow can not understand
These towns with names chock-full of K's.
For instance, once it fell to me
To pack my grip and quickly go--
I thought at first to Kankakee
But then remembered Kokomo.
"Oh, Kankakee or Kokomo,"
I sighed, "just which I do not know."
Then to the ticket man I went--
He was a snappy man, and bald,
Behind an iron railing pent--
And I confessed that I was stalled.
"A much K'd town is booked for me,"
I said. "I'm due to-morrow, so
I wonder if it's Kankakee
Or if it can be Kokomo."
"There's quite a difference," growled he,
"'Twixt Kokomo and Kankakee."
He spun a yard of tickets out--
The folded kind that makes a strip
And leaves the passenger in doubt
When the conductor takes a clip.
He flipped the tickets out, I say,
And asked: "Now, which one shall it be?
I'll sell you tickets either way--
To Kokomo or Kankakee."
And still I really did not know--
I thought it might be Kokomo.
At any rate, I took a chance;
He struck his stamp-machine a blow
And I, a toy of circumstance,
Was ticketed for Kokomo.
Upon the train I wondered still
If all was right as it should be.
Some mystic warning seemed to fill
My mind with thoughts of Kankakee,
The car-wheels clicked it out: "Now, he
Had better be for Kankakee!"
Until at last it grew so loud,
At some big town I clambered out
And elbowed madly through the crowd,
Determined on the other route.
The ticket-agent saw my haste;
"Where do you wish to go?" cried he.
I yelled: "I have no time to waste--
Please fix me up for Kankakee!"
Again the wheels, now fast, now slow,
Clicked: "Ought to go to Kokomo!"
Well, anyhow, I did not heed
The message that they sent to me.
I went, and landed wrong indeed--
Went all the way to Kankakee.
Then, in a rush, I doubled back--
Went wrong again, I'd have you know.
There was no call for me, alack!
Within the town of Kokomo.
And then I learned, confound the luck,
I should have gone to _Keokuk_!
THE DEACON'S TROUT
BY HENRY WARD BEECHER
He was a curious trout. I believe he knew Sunday just as well as Deacon
Marble did. At any rate, the deacon thought the trout meant to aggravate
him. The deacon, you know, is a little waggish. He often tells about
that trout. Sez he, "One Sunday morning, just as I got along by the
willows, I heard an awful splash, and not ten feet from shore I saw the
trout, as long as my arm, just curving over like a bow, and going down
with something for breakfast. Gracious! says I, and I almost jumped out
of the wagon. But my wife Polly, says she, 'What on airth are you
thinkin' of, Deacon? It's Sabbath day, and you're goin' to meetin'! It's
a pretty business for a deacon!' That sort o' cooled me off. But I do
say that, for about a minute, I wished I wasn't a deacon. But 't
wouldn't made any difference, for I came down next day to mill on
purpose, and I came down once or twice more, and nothin' was to be seen,
tho' I tried him with the most temptin' things. Wal, next Sunday I came
along ag'in, and, to save my life I couldn't keep off worldly and
wanderin' thoughts. I tried to be sayin' my catechism, but I couldn't
keep my eyes off the pond as we came up to the willows. I'd got along in
the catechism, as smooth as the road, to the Fourth Commandment, and was
sayin' it out loud for Polly, and jist as I was sayin: '_What is
required in the Fourth Commandment?_' I heard a splash, and there was
the trout, and, afore I could think, I said: 'Gracious, Polly, I must
have that trout.' She almost riz right up, 'I knew you wa'n't sayin'
your catechism hearty. Is this the way you answer the question about
keepin' the Lord's day? I'm ashamed, Deacon Marble,' says she. 'You'd
better change your road, and go to meetin' on the road over the hill. If
I was a deacon, I wouldn't let a fish's tail whisk the whole catechism
out of my head'; and I had to go to meetin' on the hill road all the
rest of the summer."
ENOUGH[2]
BY TOM MASSON
I shot a rocket in the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where
Until next day, with rage profound,
The man it fell on came around.
In less time than it takes to tell,
He showed me where that rocket fell;
And now I do not greatly care
To shoot more rockets in the air.
[Footnote 2: By permission of Life Publishing Company.]
THE FIGHTING RACE
BY JOSEPH I.C. CLARKE
"Read out the names!" and Burke sat back,
And Kelly drooped his head,
While Shea--they call him Scholar Jack--
Went down the list of the dead.
Officers, seamen, gunners, marines,
The crews of the gig and yawl,
The bearded man and the lad in his teens,
Carpenters, coal-passers--all.
Then knocking the ashes from out his pipe,
Said Burke, in an off-hand way,
"We're all in that dead man's list, by Cripe!
Kelly and Burke and Shea."
"Well, here's to the Maine, and I'm sorry for Spain!"
Said Kelly and Burke and Shea.
"Wherever there's Kellys there's trouble," said Burke.
"Wherever fighting's the game,
Or a spice of danger in grown man's work,"
Said Kelly, "you'll find my name."
"And do we fall short," said Burke, getting mad,
"When it's touch and go for life?"
Said Shea, "It's thirty-odd years, be dad,
Since I charged to drum and fife
Up Marye's Heights, and my old canteen
Stopped a Rebel ball on its way.
There were blossoms of blood on our sprigs of green--
Kelly and Burke and Shea--
And the dead didn't brag." "Well, here's to the flag!"
Said Kelly and Burke and Shea.
"I wish 'twas in Ireland, for there's the place,"
Said Burke, "that we'd die by right,
In the cradle of our soldier race,
After one good stand-up fight.
My grandfather fell on Vinegar Hill,
And fighting was not his trade;
But his rusty pike's in the cabin still,
With Hessian blood on the blade."
"Aye, aye," said Kelly, "the pikes were great
When the word was 'Clear the way!'
We were thick on the roll in ninety-eight--
Kelly and Burke and Shea."
"Well, here's to the pike and the sword and the like!"
Said Kelly and Burke and Shea.
And Shea, the scholar, with rising joy,
Said "We were at Ramillies.
We left our bones at Fontenoy,
And up in the Pyrenees,
Before Dunkirk, on Landen's plain,
Cremona, Lille, and Ghent,
We're all over Austria, France, and Spain,
Wherever they pitched a tent.
We've died for England from Waterloo
To Egypt and Dargai;
And still there's enough for a corps or crew,
Kelly and Burke and Shea."
"Well, here is to good honest fighting blood!"
Said Kelly and Burke and Shea.
"Oh, the fighting races don't die out,
If they seldom die in bed,
For love is first in their hearts, no doubt,"
Said Burke. Then Kelly said:
"When Michael, the Irish Archangel, stands,
The angel with the sword,
And the battle-dead from a hundred lands
Are ranged in one big horde,
Our line, that for Gabriel's trumpet waits,
Will stretch tree deep that day,
From Jehoshaphat to the Golden Gates--
Kelly and Burke and Shea."
"Well, here's thank God for the race and the sod!"
Said Kelly and Burke and Shea.
THE ORGAN
BY HENRY WARD BEECHER
At one of his week night lectures, Beecher was speaking about the
building and equipping of new churches. After a few satirical touches
about church architects and their work, he went on to ridicule the usual
style of pulpit--the "sacred mahogany tub"--"plastered up against some
pillar like a barn-swallow's nest." Then he passed on to the erection of
the organ, and to the opening recital.
"The organ long expected has arrived, been unpacked, set up, and gloried
over. The great players of the region round about, or of distant
celebrity, have had the grand organ exhibition; and this magnificent
instrument has been put through all its paces in a manner which has
surprised every one, and, if it had had a conscious existence, must have
surprised the organ itself most of all. It has piped, fluted, trumpeted,
brayed, thundered. It has played so loud that everybody was deafened,
and so soft that nobody could hear. The pedals played for thunder, the
flutes languished and coquetted, and the swell died away in delicious
suffocation, like one singing a sweet song under the bed-clothes. Now it
leads down a stupendous waltz with full brass, sounding very much as if,
in summer, a thunderstorm should play, 'Come, Haste to the Wedding,' or
'Moneymusk.' Then come marches, galops, and hornpipes. An organ playing
hornpipes ought to have elephants as dancers.
"At length a fugue is rendered to show the whole scope and power of the
instrument. The theme, like a cautious rat, peeps out to see if the
coast is clear; and, after a few hesitations, comes forth and begins to
frisk a little, and run up and down to see what it can find. It finds
just what it did not want, a purring tenor lying in ambush and waiting
for a spring; and as the theme comes incautiously near, the savage cat
of a tenor springs at it, misses its hold, and then takes after it with
terrible earnestness. But the tenor has miscalculated the agility of the
theme. All that it could do, with the most desperate effort, was to keep
the theme from running back into its hole again; and so they ran up and
down, around and around, dodging, eluding, whipping in and out of every
corner and nook, till the whole organ was aroused, and the bass began to
take part, but unluckily slipped and rolled down-stairs, and lay at the
bottom raving and growling in the most awful manner, and nothing could
appease it. Sometimes the theme was caught by one part, and dangled for
a moment, then with a snatch, another part took it and ran off exultant,
until, unawares, the same trick was played on it; and, finally, all the
parts, being greatly exercised in mind, began to chase each other
promiscuously in and out, up and down, now separating and now rushing in
full tilt together, until everything in the organ loses patience and all
the 'stops' are drawn, and, in spite of all that the brave organist
could do--who bobbed up and down, feet, hands, head and all--the tune
broke up into a real row, and every part was clubbing every other one,
until at length, patience being no longer a virtue, the organist, with
two or three terrible crashes, put an end to the riot, and brought the
great organ back to silence."
MY GRANDMOTHER'S TURKEY-TAIL FAN
BY SAMUEL MINTURN PECK
It owned not the color that vanity dons
Or slender wits choose for display;
Its beautiful tint was a delicate bronze,
A brown softly blended with gray.
From her waist to her chin, spreading out without break,
'Twas built on a generous plan:
The pride of the forest was slaughtered to make
My grandmother's turkey-tail fan.
For common occasions it never was meant:
In a chest between two silken cloths
'Twas kept safely hidden with careful intent
In camphor to keep out the moths.
'Twas famed far and wide through the whole countryside,
From Beersheba e'en unto Dan;
And often at meeting with envy 'twas eyed,
My grandmother's turkey-tail fan.
Camp-meetings, indeed, were its chiefest delight.
Like a crook unto sheep gone astray
It beckoned backsliders to re-seek the right,
And exhorted the sinners to pray.
It always beat time when the choir went wrong,
In psalmody leading the van.
Old Hundred, I know, was its favorite song--
My grandmother's turkey-tail fan.
A fig for the fans that are made nowadays,
Suited only to frivolous mirth!
A different thing was the fan that I praise,
Yet it scorned not the good things of earth.
At bees and at quiltings 'twas aye to be seen;
The best of the gossip began
When in at the doorway had entered serene
My grandmother's turkey-tail fan.
Tradition relates of it wonderful tales.
Its handle of leather was buff.
Though shorn of its glory, e'en now it exhales
An odor of hymn-books and snuff.
Its primeval grace, if you like, you can trace:
'Twas limned for the future to scan,
Just under a smiling gold-spectacled face,
My grandmother's turkey-tail fan.
_HOW TO ENJOY THE ECSTASY THAT ACCOMPANIES SUCCESSFUL SPEAKING_
Before An Audience
OR
The Use of the Will in Public Speaking
By NATHAN SHEPPARD
_Talks to the Students of the University of St. Andrew and the
University of Aberdeen_
This is not a book on elocution, but it deals in a practical
common-sense way with the requirements and constituents of effective
public speaking.
CAPITAL, FAMILIAR, AND RACY
"I shall recommend it to our three schools of elocution. It is
capital, familiar, racy, and profoundly philosophical."--_Joseph T.
Duryea, D.D._
REPLETE WITH PRACTICAL SENSE
"It is replete with practical sense and sound suggestions, and I
should like to have it talked into the students by the
author."--_Prof. J.H. Gilmore_, Rochester University.
"KNOCKS TO FLINDERS" OLD THEORIES
"The author knocks to flinders the theories of elocutionist, and
opposes all their rules with one simple counsel--'Wake up your
will.'"--_The New York Evangelist._
TO REACH, MOVE, AND INFLUENCE MEN
"He does not teach elocution, but the art of public speaking....
Gives suggestions that will enable one to reach and move and
influence men."--_The Pittsburg Chronicle._
_12mo, Cloth, 152 Pages. Price, 75 cents_
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers
NEW YORK and LONDON
_FORCEFUL SPEAKING BY NEW METHODS_
THE ESSENTIALS OF ELOCUTION
_Revised, Enlarged, New Matter_
By ALFRED AYRES
_Author of "The Orthoepist," "The Verbalist," etc., etc._
A unique and valuable guide on the art of speaking the language so as to
make the thought it expresses clear and impressive. It is a departure
from the old and conventional methods which have tended so often to make
mere automatons on the platform or stage instead of animated souls.
_HIGHLY PRAISED BY AUTHORITIES_
"It is worth more than all the ponderous philosophies on the
subject."--_The Lutheran Observer._
"It is a case where brevity is the soul of value."--_The Rochester
Herald._
"His suggestions are simple and sensible."--_The
Congregationalist._
"An unpretentious but really meritorious volume."--_Dramatic
Review._
"Mr. Ayres has made this subject a study for many years, and what
he has written is worth reading"--_The Dramatic News._
"It is brightly written and original."--_Richard Henry Stoddard._
_16mo, Cloth, 174 Pages, Tasteful Binding Deckle Edges. With
Frontispiece. 75 cts._
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers
NEW YORK and LONDON
HOW TO SPEAK IN PUBLIC
_A Most Suggestive and Practical Self-Instructor_
By GRENVILLE KLEISER
Author of "Power and Personality in Speaking," etc.
This new book is a complete elocutionary manual comprizing numerous
exercises for developing the speaking voice, deep breathing,
pronunciation, vocal expression, and gesture; also selections for
practise from masterpieces of ancient and modern eloquence. It is
intended for students, teachers, business men, lawyers, clergymen,
politicians, clubs, debating societies, and, in fact, every one
interested in the art of public speaking.
_OUTLINE OF CONTENTS_
Mechanics of Elocution Previous Preparation
Mental Aspects Physical Preparation
Public Speaking Mental Preparation
Selections for Practise Moral Preparation
Preparation of Speech
"Many useful suggestions in it."--_Hon. Joseph H. Choate_, New
York.
"It is admirable and practical instruction in the technic of
speaking, and I congratulate you upon your thorough work."--_Hon.
Albert J. Beveridge._
"The work has been very carefully and well compiled from a large
number of our best works on the subject of elocution. It contains
many admirable suggestions for those who are interested in becoming
better speakers. As a general text for use in teaching public
speaking, it may be used with great success."
_John W. Wetzel_, Instructor in Public Speaking, Yale University,
New Haven, Conn.
_12mo, Cloth. $1.25, Net; Post-paid, $1.40_
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers
NEW YORK and LONDON
HOW TO DEVELOP
Power and Personality
IN SPEAKING
By GRENVILLE KLEISER
Author of "How to Speak in Public." Introduction by Lewis O. Brastow,
D.D., _Professor Emeritus, Yale Divinity School_
This new book gives practical suggestions and exercises for Developing
Power and Personality in Speaking. It has many selections for practise.
POWER.--Power of Voice--Power of Gesture--Power of Vocabulary--Power of
Imagination--Power of English Style--Power of Illustration--Power of
Memory--Power of Extempore Speech--Power of Conversation--Power of
Silence--Power of a Whisper--Power of the Eye.
PERSONALITY.--More Personality for the Lawyer--The Salesman--The
Preacher--The Politician--The Physician--The Congressman--The Alert
Citizen.
"I give it my hearty commendation. It should take its place upon
the library shelves of every public speaker; be read carefully,
consulted frequently, and held as worthy of faithful obedience. For
lack of the useful hints that here abound, many men murder the
truth by their method of presenting it."--S. PARKES CADMAN, D.D.,
Brooklyn, N.Y.
"It is a book of value. The selections are fine. It is an excellent
book for college students."--WM. P. FRYE, _President pro tem. of
the United States Senate._
_12mo, Cloth, 422 pages. Price, $1.25, net; by mail, $1.40_
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers
NEW YORK AND LONDON
How to Develop
Self-Confidence
in Speech and Manner
By GRENVILLE KLEISER
_Author of "How to Speak in Public"; "How to Develop Power and
Personality in Speaking," etc._
The purpose of this book is to inspire in men lofty ideals. It is
particularly for those who daily defraud themselves because of doubt,
fearthought, and foolish timidity.
Thousands of persons are held in physical and mental bondage, owing to
lack of self-confidence. Distrusting themselves, they live a life of
limited effort, and at last pass on without having realized more than a
small part of their rich possessions. It is believed that this book will
be of substantial service to those who wish to rise above mediocrity,
and who feel within them something of their divine inheritance. It is
commended with confidence to every ambitious man.
_CONTENTS_
Preliminary Steps--Building the Will--The Cure of
Self-Consciousness--The Power of Right Thinking--Sources of
Inspiration--Concentration--Physical Basis--Finding
Yourself--General Habits--The Man and the Manner--The Discouraged
Man--Daily Steps in Self-Culture--Imagination and
Initiative--Positive and Negative Thought--The Speaking
Voice--Confidence in Business--Confidence in Society--Confidence in
Public Speaking--Toward the Heights--Memory Passages that Build
Confidence.
_12mo, Cloth. $1.25, net; by mail, $1.35_
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers
NEW YORK AND LONDON
How to
ARGUE AND WIN
IN CONVERSATION, IN SALESMANSHIP, IN COMMITTEE-MEETINGS, IN JURY CASES,
IN THE PULPIT, ON THE ROSTRUM, IN DEBATING SOCIETIES.
By GRENVILLE KLEISER
_Author of "How to Speak in Public," etc._
In this book will be found definite suggestions for training the mind in
accurate thinking and in the power of clear and effective statement. It
is the outcome of many years of experience in teaching men "to think on
their feet." The aim throughout is practical, and the ultimate end is a
knowledge of successful argumentation.
CONTENTS
Introductory--Truth and Facts--Clearness and Conciseness--The Use
of Words--The Syllogism--Faults--Personality--The Lawyer--The
Business Man--The Preacher--The Salesman--The Public
Speaker--Brief-Drawing--The Discipline of Debate--Tact--Cause and
Effect--Reading Habits--Questions for Solution--Specimens of
Argumentation--Golden Rules in Argumentation.
Note for Law Lecture _Abraham Lincoln_
Of Truth _Francis Bacon_
Of Practise and Habits _John Locke_
Improving the Memory _Isaac Watts_
"Mr. Kleiser offers no panacea (as the title might seem to imply).
Logic will not make a dunce a philosopher, neither will it insure
success where success is not deserved. But what he does offer the
honest debater in this practical book, is to put him in possession
of those laws of argumentation which lie at the bottom of sound
reasoning, based on fact."--_Times-Dispatch_, Richmond, Va.
_12mo, Cloth. $1.25, net; by mail, $1.35_
FUNK & WAGNALLS COMPANY, Publishers,
NEW YORK AND LONDON
How to Read and Declaim
A COURSE OF INSTRUCTION IN READING AND DECLAMATION HAVING AS ITS PRIME
OBJECT THE CULTIVATION OF TASTE AND REFINEMENT
By GRENVILLE KLEISER
_Formerly Instructor in Public Speaking at Yale Divinity School; Author
of "How to Speak in Public," etc._
This eminently practical book is divided into five parts: