been betrothed in infancy, and lost their partners before the period
of what they call “the second marriage.” These girls can never marry
without losing caste; but as the affections cannot be controlled by
custom, these unfortunate beings often forfeit their characters by
imprudence. Suicides on this account were so common, that an officer
of the British government, in order to prevent them in his district,
commanded that all such corpses should be exposed to the public gaze.
The law proved so effectual, that there was never any necessity for
enforcing it.
Marriages between little girls and very old men are common in India.
The Hindoo girls usually marry between the ages of seven and nine
years, and the boys between twelve and fourteen. The wife must not only
be of the same caste with her husband, but also of the same family.
The Hindoo has a right to marry the daughter of his father, or of his
mother’s brother. Parents cannot give a denial when their daughter is
demanded, because brothers and sisters only, of the same caste, are
forbidden to marry; but under that name the law includes the children
of the father’s brothers, and of the mother’s sisters.
The ceremonies vary among different castes, and in different districts.
The wealthy give very expensive entertainments, the cost of which is
defrayed by the husband’s father. The practice likewise varies in
regard to dowry. In the superior castes, the wife generally brings her
husband a portion; but among the sooders, the bridegroom gives a sum of
money to the bride’s father. One kind of the ancient Hindoo marriages
required no ceremony but the mutual consent of the parties. Without
witnesses, they exchanged necklaces or wreaths of flowers, the girl
saying, “I am thy wife;” and the bridegroom replying, “It is true.” In
the inferior castes the marriage ceremony is still very simple, but it
is not considered legal unless performed in the presence of the chief
of the tribe.
A singular custom has been said to prevail in a town of the Carnatic.
When a young couple are conducted to the temple, the bride offers her
hand to the priest, who cuts off the third and little finger at the
second joint. In ancient times both parties sacrificed a joint of the
finger; but as this sometimes made it difficult for the husband to
follow his profession, the Bramins decided that the woman should make a
double sacrifice, and lose two fingers instead of one. A woman of that
caste considers it a disgrace to have all her fingers.
Before any match is concluded, great pains is taken to ascertain
whether the aspect of the stars predicts a fortunate or unfortunate
union. Marriages are solemnized only in February, May, June, October,
and the beginning of November.
When a Hindoo has fixed his mind upon what he considers a suitable
match for his son, he sends a stranger to sound the girl’s father, in
order to save himself the shame of an open rejection. If the suggestion
be favorably received, he goes and makes a formal proposition. He must
be accompanied by some married woman, by several relations, and a
Bramin skilled to explain omens. To meet a dealer in oil, a dog that
shakes his ears, a crow flying over their heads, and a hundred other
such things, are considered signs so unlucky, as to make it necessary
to defer the visit. He generally carries the _pariam_, a sum of money
from four to six guineas, as the price of the girl. Such marriages
are said to be by _pariam_. The bride’s father returns the visit with
great ceremony and pomp, carrying presents to the bridegroom. After
these formalities, the girl is considered as sold; but the match may
be broken off, and the _pariam_ returned, if it be determined by a
general meeting of the relatives, and sometimes of the whole caste,
that the bride’s father has any justifiable reason for so doing. To
avoid the expense of an entertainment which it is customary to give,
the _pariam_ is frequently paid on the wedding day; but some pay it
a year beforehand. The bridegroom presents the bride with a piece of
silk, which she wears on the wedding day. This garment is always silk,
if the parties be ever so poor. If the _pariam_ be in money, it is tied
up in one corner of this robe; if it be a jewel, it is laid upon it.
There is another kind of marriage where the _pariam_ is dispensed with.
This is called _cannigadanam_, which signifies _the gift of a maiden_.
When the day is fixed for the wedding, the bride’s father builds a
bower of lattice-work in the courtyard of his house. The erection of
this _pendal_, or marriage bower, is considered a publication of the
bans, and friends and relations immediately pay a ceremonious visit.
The female friends, walking under a canopy, bring presents of betel to
the young couple. In the midst of the court is set up a stone image of
Polear, god of marriage. The Bramins make offerings of cocoas, bananas,
and betel, praying that the god would be propitious to the marriage. As
soon as the _pendal_ is finished, the image is removed. The bridegroom,
richly dressed, and accompanied by his friends in festal attire, is
conducted to the house of the bride. Here a particular ceremony is
performed, called _taking away the looks_; for the Hindoos believe the
most deplorable consequences would ensue, if any person looked on the
young man with envious, or malicious eyes. To avert this disaster, they
prepare a basin of water colored red, which they turn round three times
before the face of the bridegroom, and then throw it into the street;
sometimes they tear a strip of cloth before him, and throw the pieces
different ways; and sometimes they fasten certain mystic rings on the
heads of the couple. The bridegroom and bride, splendidly dressed, are
carried about for several days in palanquins, accompanied by a long
train of relations and friends, some riding on horses, and some on
elephants, preceded by musicians and dancing girls. These processions
are generally in the evening, attended by illuminations and fireworks.
While these ceremonies continue, the dancing girls meet in the _pendal_
morning and evening, and rub the young couple with _naleng_, the small
green seed of a plant sacred to marriage. While the assembled guests
are dining, the bride and bridegroom eat together from the same plate.
This is the only time during her whole life that a Hindoo wife is
allowed to eat with her husband. On the wedding day, the bride and
bridegroom sit beside each other, at one end of the _pendal_, which
is lighted with a great number of lamps. The Bramins, on a raised
platform, surrounded with jars of water, offer prayers to their gods.
They then kindle the sacrificial fire, with various kinds of sacred
wood, and repeat prayers and invocations, while they throw into the
flames incense, sandal-wood, oil, butter, rice, and other things. When
the prayers are ended, the father of the bride puts her hand within
that of the bridegroom, calls the god of fire to witness his words, and
then repeats after the Bramin: “I, ----, the son of ---- and grandson
of ----, give my daughter to thee, son of ---- and grandson of ----.”
The Bramin breaks a cocoa-nut in two, blesses the _tali_, which all
present are required to touch, and gives it to the bridegroom, who
hangs it round the neck of the bride. The _tali_ is a golden ornament
for the neck, made in various forms, and is worn by all married women,
in the same manner as the wedding-ring with us. The young couple walk
three times round the fire, and the bridegroom swears in presence of
the Bramin that he will take care of his wife. He then casts into the
fire boiled rice and butter, and she casts in parched rice. The priest
repeats prayers while he mixes a little saffron with raw rice. This he
first sprinkles over the shoulders of the husband, and then of the
wife; all who are present rise and perform the same ceremony, by way
of benediction. In the marriages of princes, pearls are sometimes used
instead of rice. The rest of the day is spent in diversions, and the
last public procession takes place in the evening.
Next day, they hasten to pull down the _pendal_; because it would be
considered a very bad omen if it should happen to take fire. The bride
is often so very young that she remains at her father’s house for a
considerable time after the wedding. When this is the case, she is
afterward given to her husband with similar ceremonies and festivities,
called “the second, or little, marriage.” The Hindoo brides wear a
hymeneal crown, and the color of the nuptial robe is golden yellow.
Until a wife becomes a mother, she is obliged to obey the commands of
her mother-in-law, and sees her husband by stealth. The birth of a
child is attended with many religious ceremonies. The husband, assisted
by Bramins, sprinkles the house with holy water, and all the inmates
anoint themselves with oil, and wash themselves. The mother is bathed,
and drinks a certain beverage prescribed for such occasions. On the
tenth day, friends and relations assemble to give a name to the infant;
but the Bramin first consults the planets, endeavors by prayer to avert
any evil influence, and ties a _zinar_, or amulet, about the neck of
the child. Presents are then made to the priests, and the ceremony is
concluded with a feast and rejoicings.
The Hindoo women make no use of a cradle. The babe, unshackled by any
clothing or bandages, is laid on a large piece of cloth stretched
on pieces of wood, something like a small quilting frame. This is
suspended by strong cords from the ceiling, and two women swing it, by
pushing it from one to the other.
When the child has attained the age of six months, it is fed for the
first time with rice prepared with milk and sugar. On this occasion a
feast is made and all the relations invited.
If a child dies, the mother sits at the door, or by the river’s side,
and utters loud lamentations, like the following: “Ah, my Huree-das,
where has he gone? Who has taken my golden image? I never saw a face
like unto his! He played round me like a golden top! Take me with thee!”
If any female neighbor tries to console her, she answers: “Ah, mother,
the heart takes no advice. Was this a child to be forgotten? He had
a forehead like a king! Since it was born the master never staid in
the house; he was always walking about with the child in his arms! I
nourished and reared him--where is he gone?”
While mourning in this way, they sometimes beat their foreheads, tear
their hair, and roll about, as if in agony. Hindoo wives never call
their husbands by name, but always say, “the master.”
Very singular customs prevail among the people called Garos. If a man’s
wife prove unfaithful, he cannot obtain divorce, unless he chooses to
give her all the property and children. A woman, on the contrary,
may part from her husband when she pleases, and by marrying another
person, convey to him the whole property of her former husband. The
children go with her, but their rank is decided by that of the father.
If the wife has a lover, the husband may indeed kill him, but he incurs
the resentment of all the man’s relations, and the woman would be
very likely to revenge herself by transferring the property to a new
husband. Divorces are, however, said to be rare. When a chief dies, his
heir is any one of his sister’s sons, whom his widow may choose as a
successor. If the youth is married, he immediately separates from his
wife, who takes all his private fortune and his children; he marries
the widow, and receives the wealth and rank of his predecessor. When
the old lady dies, he is at liberty to choose a young wife, who, if
she survive him, will, in her turn, select one of his sister’s sons.
The wife of a chief, when she divorces her husband, is obliged to
choose one from the same noble family. The red turban and bell-metal
bracelets, which are bestowed with great ceremony on the new chieftain,
do not always make him contented with a partner so much older than
himself. One, who was almost a boy, complained to an Englishman, with
great simplicity, that he had married a toothless old woman, while his
poor cousin had a pretty young wife, with whom he could play all the
day long.
The Bramins, by a peculiar custom, often take wives against their own
will. If a father has a marriageable daughter, on whom he wishes to see
conferred the privileges belonging to a Bramin’s wife, he invites the
Bramin to his house, and introduces the girl to him; she respectfully
offers her hand to the unsuspecting visiter, and the moment he takes
it, her father begins to repeat the genealogy of his family. This
constitutes a legal marriage, and there is no way of escape from it.
Some writers have mentioned a tribe in the Carnatic, whose women are
not allowed to be seen by any man, not even their husbands, who visit
them only in the dark. Shut up in secluded apartments with their female
companions, they employ themselves in weaving mats and baskets, and
similar occupations. Even their sons are taken from them at three or
four years old, and never suffered to look on them again. Women of
their own tribe nurse them when they are ill, and when dead, their
husbands sew them up in a sack, before they are carried to the funeral
pile. This singular tribe was never large, and is now said to be nearly
extinct.
The clothing of the Hindoos is seldom washed; for neatness is not their
characteristic. The fashion of their garments is modest; the arms and
upper part of the neck only being uncovered. Women of all castes,
throughout India, load themselves with jewels. Common bracelets are
made of vitrified earth, green, yellow, and black. Another kind are
made of glass, and esteemed beautiful in proportion to the closeness
with which they fit to the arm. Blood is often drawn, and the skin
rubbed off, in getting them over the hand; and as they are continually
breaking, the poor girls suffer not a little for their vanity. Gems,
gold, and rare shells, exquisitely manufactured, are worn in the utmost
profusion by those who can afford them. The loss of the precious metals
in India, by friction alone, is said to be immense. The fashion is of
ancient date, for the oldest statues of their gods and goddesses are
almost buried in jewels.
Females of the higher castes, married or unmarried, never go abroad
alone, and without being completely veiled. If by any accident their
faces happen to be uncovered, and they meet a European, they run, as
fast as they can, into the first Hindoo house that has an appearance
of respectability. In the interior of the country, a whole village of
women are put in consternation by the sight of a European; this is
probably in some measure owing to the insults of intoxicated soldiers.
The rajpoots, one of the military tribes of Hindostan, treat their
women with an unusual degree of respect. A rajpoot never forgives an
insult offered to his wife or daughter, and nothing but the death of
the culprit can atone for his offence. None but the grandees avail
themselves of the privilege to take several wives; and even they seldom
do it, except from political considerations. Their married women never
visit any but their nearest relatives; and any female would be very
much ashamed of being seen in public. The rajpoots, though exceedingly
kind husbands and sons, have one strangely unnatural custom; they put
to death new-born female infants when they have no prospect of an
advantageous settlement for them. The daughters which they bring up are
kept most rigidly secluded from society. Merely to have been seen by
any other man than their very nearest relation is considered pollution.
The rajpoots carry this feeling so far, that when they cannot escape
from a besieging enemy, they murder all their women, to prevent their
being seen by strangers.
The Mahrattas of Hindostan form a kind of military republic, and live
in a miserably uncleanly, half-barbarous manner. The women have very
little beauty, and have generally a bold look, different from any other
Hindoo females. The poor sling their children over their shoulders in
a bag, and march thus a whole day, without any apparent fatigue. They
accompany the army on horseback, with faces uncovered, and seated in
the same manner as the men. A circumstance related by Broughton, in
his Letters, gives us reason to think highly of the morals of this
rude tribe. A young girl served in Sindia’s army two or three years,
without being discovered. She gained the confidence of her superiors,
and the regard of her associates, by conduct remarkably regular and
exemplary. She always dressed her own dinner, and ate it by herself;
and she was never seen to wash in the presence of any person. The
secret which she took so much pains to conceal, was discovered by a
young comrade, who followed her when she went to bathe. As soon as it
was known that a woman had served so long and so faithfully in the
army, Sindia made her flattering offers of promotion in the corps to
which she belonged, and his wife proposed to receive her into her own
household; but Jooruor Singh, as the young soldier was named, refused
all patronage, and continued to serve for some months. She was about
twenty-two years of age, with a fair and interesting countenance,
though not handsome. She frankly answered questions concerning her
situation, alike without bashfulness or boldness. It was finally
discovered that the affectionate creature had encountered the fatigues
and perils of military life with the hope of raising money enough
to liberate a beloved brother imprisoned at Bopal. As soon as this
circumstance became known to Sindia, he discharged her from the army,
made her a liberal donation, and gave her a letter to the nabob of
Bopal, earnestly recommending her and her brother to his protection.
It is very much to the honor of all parties, that Jooruor Singh, from
the moment she was known to be a woman, received increased deference
and attention; not even the meanest soldier presumed to utter an
offensive word in her presence.
This furnishes a good commentary on the severe but often-evaded laws of
the harem. Perfect external freedom is always the greatest safeguard of
virtue.
The Nairs, on the coast of Malabar, have very extraordinary customs,
for the origin of which it is difficult to account. Their women are
beautiful and remarkably neat. They are usually married before they
are ten years of age; but it would be deemed exceedingly indecorous
for the husband to live with his wife, or even to visit her, except as
an acquaintance. She lives with her mother, and prides herself on the
number of her lovers, especially if they be Bramins or rajahs; but if
any of them were her inferiors, she would be immediately expelled from
her caste, which is the greatest misfortune that can befall a Hindoo.
Owing to these strange customs, a Nair has much more affection for his
sister’s children than for those of his wife, and no one is offended at
being asked who is his father. The husband is, of course, the lover of
some other married dame. If he offers the lady cloth for a dress, and
she accepts it, the matter is settled, until they see fit to change.
Sons inherit the fortune of the maternal grandfather. The heir apparent
to the throne of Travancore is not the son of the rajah’s wife, but of
his oldest sister, who is treated as queen.
The Nairs treat their mothers with the utmost respect, and have a
filial regard for maternal uncles and aunts; but they scarcely notice
their fathers, and have little affection for brothers and sisters. Yet
notwithstanding this allowed profligacy, these singular people are very
jealous of the honor of their women. An intrigue with a European, or
one of a different tribe, would be punished with death. The Bramins
indeed are allowed to be the lovers of wives and daughters of the other
superior castes; their proposals are deemed too great an honor to be
refused. The disgusting class called fakirs likewise obtain great
influence over the minds of women by their ostentatious sanctity. They
often carry beautiful girls to their temples, under the pretence that
the god has chosen them for wives; and this is considered an enviable
distinction. The women among the Nairs go with the upper part of the
person entirely uncovered; as is generally the case throughout Malabar,
and even in the southern parts of the peninsula. They have their ears
bored in childhood, and in order to enlarge the aperture, they put in
a rolled leaf of the cocoa tree, or suspend a piece of lead; afterward
they insert small round ivory cases. They wear the hair flowing loosely
behind, or hanging in several tresses curiously braided. It is never
cut off, except in seasons of mourning, or as a punishment.
The women in this part of Hindostan have a singular custom. When a
young girl is betrothed, when she is married, and when a son is born,
all the female relatives meet at her house, and make the event known to
the neighbors by a long, loud, monotonous howl, which one would suppose
was intended to express any thing but joy.
There is a caste in Hindostan, comprising all painters and gilders, in
which brothers marry their sisters, and uncles their nieces.
At funerals, hired female mourners tear their hair, beat themselves,
and utter dismal cries. The custom of widows burning themselves upon
the funeral pile of their husbands is not commanded as a religious duty
in any of their sacred writings; but enthusiastic devotees have been
led to sanction the cruel ceremony by the following text: “The woman
who dies with her husband shall enjoy life eternal with him in heaven.”