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TALKS ON TALKING
by
GRENVILLE KLEISER
Formerly Instructor in Public Speaking at Yale Divinity School,
Yale University; author of "How to Speak in Public," "How to
Develop Power and Personality in Speaking," "How to Develop
Self-Confidence in Speech and Manner," "How to Argue and Win,"
"How to Read and Declaim," "Complete Guide to Public Speaking,";
etc.
Copyright, 1916, by
Funk. & Wagnalls Company
(Printed in the United States of America)
Published, September, 1916
Copyright under the articles of the Copyright Convention of the
Pan-American Republics and the United States, August 11, 1910
CONTENTS
PAGE
THE ART OF TALKING 1
TYPES OF TALKERS 11
TALKERS AND TALKING 18
PHRASES FOR TALKERS 25
THE SPEAKING VOICE 34
HOW TO TELL A STORY 44
TALKING IN SALESMANSHIP 56
MEN AND MANNERISMS 63
HOW TO SPEAK IN PUBLIC 70
PRACTICAL HINTS FOR SPEAKERS 84
THE DRAMATIC ELEMENT IN SPEAKING 87
CONVERSATION AND PUBLIC SPEAKING 94
A TALK TO PREACHERS 100
CARE OF THE SPEAKER'S THROAT 108
DON'TS FOR PUBLIC SPEAKERS 116
DO'S FOR PUBLIC SPEAKERS 118
POINTS FOR SPEAKERS 120
THE BIBLE ON SPEECH 122
THOUGHTS ON TALKING 123
PREFACE
Good conversation implies naturalness, spontaneity, and sincerity of
utterance. It is not advisable, therefore, to lay down arbitrary rules
to govern talking, but it is believed that the suggestions offered here
will contribute to the general elevation and improvement of daily
speech.
Considering the large number of persons who are obliged to talk in
social, business, and public life, the subject of correct speech should
receive more serious consideration than is usually given to it. It is
earnestly hoped that this volume will be of practical value to those who
are desirous of developing and improving their conversational powers.
Appreciative thanks are expressed to the Editors of the _Homiletic
Review_ for permission to reprint some of the extracts.
GRENVILLE KLEISER.
NEW YORK CITY,
MAY, 1916.
Boys flying kites haul in their white-wing'd birds:
You can't do that way when you're flying words.
"Careful with fire," is good advice we know;
"Careful with words," is ten times doubly so.
Thoughts unexpress'd may sometimes fall back dead,
But God Himself can't kill them once they're said!
--_Will Carleton._
The first duty of a man is to speak; that is his chief business in
this world; and talk, which is the harmonious speech of two or
more, is by far the most accessible of pleasures. It costs nothing;
it is all profit; it completes our education; it founds and fosters
our friendships; and it is by talk alone that we learn our period
and ourselves.
--_Robert Louis Stevenson._
Vociferated logic kills me quite;
A noisy man is always in the right--
I twirl my thumbs, fall back into my chair,
Fix on the wainscot a distressful stare;
And when I hope his blunders all are out,
Reply discreetly, "To be sure--no doubt!"
--_Anon._
TALKS ON TALKING
THE ART OF TALKING
The charm of conversation chiefly depends upon the adaptability of the
participants. It is a great accomplishment to be able to enter gently
and agreeably into the moods of others, and to give way to them with
grace and readiness.
The spirit of conversation is oftentimes more important than the ideas
expressed. What we are rather than what we say has the most permanent
influence upon those around us. Hence it is that where a group of
persons are met together in conversation, it is the inner life of each
which silently though none the less surely imparts tone and character to
the occasion.
It requires vigorous self-discipline so to cultivate the feelings of
kindness and sympathy that they are always in readiness for use. These
qualities are essential to agreeable and profitable intercourse, though
comparatively few people possess them.
Burke considered manners of more importance than laws. Sidney Smith
described manners as the shadows of virtues. Dean Swift defined manners
as the art of putting at ease the people with whom we converse.
Chesterfield said manners should adorn knowledge in order to smooth its
way through the world. Emerson spoke of manners as composed of petty
sacrifices.
We all recognize that a winning manner is made up of seemingly
insignificant courtesies, and of constant little attentions. A person of
charming manner is usually free from resentments, inquisitiveness, and
moods.
Personality plays a large part in interesting conversation. Precisely
the same phraseology expressed by two different persons may make two
wholly different impressions, and all because of the difference in the
personalities of the speakers.
The daily mental life of a man indelibly impresses itself upon his face,
where it can be unmistakably read by others. What a person is, innately
and habitually, unconsciously discloses itself in voice, manner, and
bearing. The world ultimately appraises a man at his true value.
The best type of talker is slow to express positive opinions, is sparing
in criticism, and studiously avoids a tone or word of finality. It has
been well said that "A talker who monopolizes the conversation is by
common consent insufferable, and a man who regulates his choice of
topics by reference to what interests not his hearers but himself has
yet to learn the alphabet of the art. Conversation is like lawn-tennis,
and requires alacrity in return at least as much as vigor in service. A
happy phrase, an unexpected collocation of words, a habitual precision
in the choice of terms, are rare and shining ornaments of conversation,
but they do not for an instant supply the place of lively and
interesting matter, and an excessive care for them is apt to tell
unfavorably on the substance of discourse."
When Lord Beaconsfield was talking his way into social fame, someone
said of him, "I might as well attempt to gather up the foam of the sea
as to convey an idea of the extraordinary language in which he clothed
his description. There were at least five words in every sentence that
must have been very much astonished at the use they were put to, and yet
no others apparently could so well have expressed his idea. He talked
like a racehorse approaching the winning-post--every muscle in action,
and the utmost energy of expression flung out into every burst."
We are told that Matthew Arnold combined all the characteristics of good
conversation--politeness, vivacity, sympathy, interestedness, geniality,
a happy choice of words, and a never-failing humor. When he was once
asked what was his favorite topic for conversation, he instantly
answered, "That in which my companion is most interested."
Courtesy, it will be noted, is the fundamental basis of good
conversation. We must show habitual consideration and kindliness towards
others if we would attract them to us. Bluntness of manner is no longer
excused on the ground that the speaker is sincere and outspoken. We
expect and demand that our companion in conversation should observe the
recognized courtesies of speech.
There was a time when men and women indulged freely in satire, irony,
and repartee. They spoke their thoughts plainly and unequivocally. There
were no restraints imposed upon them by society, hence it now appears to
us that many things were said which might better have been left unsaid.
Self-restraint is nowadays one of the cardinal virtues of good
conversation.
The spirit of conversation is greatly changed. We are enjoined to keep
the voice low, think before we speak, repress unseasonable allusions,
shun whatever may cause a jar or jolt in the minds of others, be seldom
prominent in conversation, and avoid all clashing of opinion and
collision of feeling.
Macaulay was fond of talking, but made the mistake of always choosing a
subject to suit himself and monopolizing the conversation. He lectured
rather than talked. His marvelous memory was perhaps his greatest enemy,
for though it enabled him to pour forth great masses of facts, people
listened to him helplessly rather than admiringly.
Carlyle was a great talker, and talked much in protest of talking. No
man broke silence oftener than he to tell the world how great a curse is
talking. But he told it eloquently and therein was he justified. There
was in him too much vehement sternness, of hard Scotch granite, to make
him a pleasant talker in the popular sense. He was the evangelist of
golden silence, and though he did not apparently practice it himself,
his genius will never diminish.
Gladstone was unable to indulge in small talk. His mind was so
constantly occupied with great subjects that he spoke even to one person
as if addressing a meeting. It is said that in conversation with Queen
Victoria he would invariably choose weighty subjects, and though she
tried to make a digression, he would seize the first opportunity to
resume his original theme, always reinforced in volume and onrush by the
delay.
Lord Morley is attractive though austere in conversation. He never
dogmatizes nor obtrudes his own opinions. He is a master of
phrase-making. But although he talks well he never talks much.
The story is told that at a recent dinner in London ten leading public
men were met together, when one suggested that each gentleman present
should write down on paper the name of the man he would specially choose
to be his companion on a walking tour. When the ten papers were
subsequently read aloud, each bore the name of Lord Morley.
Lord Rosebery is considered one of the most accomplished talkers of the
day. Deferential, natural, sympathetic, observant, well-informed, he
easily and unconsciously commands the attention of any group of men. His
voice is said to recommend what he utters, and a singularly refined
accent gives distinction to anything he says. He is a supreme example of
two great qualifications for effective talking: having something worth
while to say, and knowing how to say it.
Among distinguished Canadians, Sir Thomas White is one of the most
interesting speakers. His versatile mind, and broad and varied
experience, enable him to converse with almost equal facility upon
politics, medicine, finance, law, science, art, literature, or
business. Dates, details, facts, figures, and illustrations are at his
ready command. His manner is natural, courteous, and genial, but in
argumentation the whole man is so thoroughly aroused to earnestness and
intensity as almost to overwhelm an opponent. His greatest quality in
speaking is his manifest sincerity, and it is this particularly which
has ingratiated him in the hearts of his countrymen.
The Honorable Joseph H. Choate must certainly be reckoned among the best
conversationalists of our time. His manner, both in conversation and in
public speaking, is singularly gracious and winning. He is unsurpassed
as a story-teller. His fine taste, combined with long experience as a
public man, makes him an ideal after-dinner speaker.
Some eminent men try to mask their greatness when engaged in
conversation. They do not wear their feelings nor their greatness on
their sleeves. Some have an utter distaste for anything like personal
display. It is said of the late Henry James that a stranger might talk
to him for an entire evening without discovering his identity.
There is an interesting account of an evening's conversation between
Emerson and Thoreau. When Thoreau returned home he wrote in his Journal:
"Talked, or tried to talk, with R.W.E. Lost my time, nay, almost my
identity. He, assuming a false opposition where there was no difference
of opinion, talked to the wind." Emerson's version of the conversation
was this: "It seemed as if Thoreau's first instinct on hearing a
proposition was to controvert it. That habit is chilling to the social
affections; it mars conversation."
Conversation offers daily opportunity for intellectual exercise of high
order. The reading of great books is desirable and indispensable to
education, but real culture comes through the additional training one
receives in conversation. The contact of mind with mind tends to
stimulate and develop thoughts which otherwise would probably remain
dormant.
The culture of conversation is to be recommended not only for its own
sake, but also as one of the best means of training in the art of public
speaking. Since the best form of platform address today is simply
conversation enlarged and elevated, it may almost be assumed that to
excel in one is to be proficient in the other.
Good conversation requires, among other things, mental alertness,
accuracy of statement, adequate vocabulary, facility of expression, and
an agreeable voice, and these qualities are most essential for effective
public speaking. Everyone, therefore, who aspires to speaking before an
audience of hundreds or thousands, will find his best opportunity for
preliminary training in everyday speech.
TYPES OF TALKERS
There is no greater affliction in modern life than the tiresome talker.
He talks incessantly. Presumably he talks in his sleep. Talking is his
constant exercise and recreation. He thrives on it. He lives for
talking's sake. He would languish if he were deprived of it for a single
day. His continuous practice in talking enables him easily to
outdistance all ordinary competitors. There is nothing which so
completely unnerves him as long periods of silence. He has the talking
habit in its most virulent form.
The trifling talker is equally objectionable. He talks much, but says
little. He skims over the surface of things, and is timid of anything
deep or philosophical. He does not tarry at one subject. He talks of the
weather, clothes, plays, and sports. He puts little meaning into what he
says, because there is little meaning in what he thinks. He cannot look
at anything seriously. Nothing is of great significance to him. He is
in the class of featherweights.
The tedious talker is one without terminal facilities. He talks right on
with no idea of objective or destination. He rises to go, but he does
not go. He knows he ought to go, but he simply cannot. He has something
more to say. He keeps you standing half an hour. He talks a while
longer. He assures you he really must go. You tell him not to hurry. He
takes you at your word and sits down again. He talks some more. He rises
again. He does not know even now how to conclude. He has no mental
compass. He is a rudderless talker.
Probably the most obnoxious type is the tattling talker. He always has
something startlingly personal to impart. It is a sacred secret for your
ear. He is a wholesale dealer in gossip. He fairly smacks his lips as he
relates the latest scandal. He is an expert embellisher. He adroitly
supplies missing details. He has nothing of interest in his own life,
since he lives wholly in the lives of others. He is a frightful bore,
but you cannot offend him. He is adamant.
There is the tautological talker, or the human self-repeater. He goes
over the ground again and again lest you have missed something. He is
very fond of himself. He tells the same story not twice, but a dozen
times. "You may have heard this before," says he, "but it is so good
that it will bear repetition." He tries to disguise his poverty of
thought in a masquerade of ornate language. If he must repeat his words,
he adds a little emphasis, a flourishing gesture, or a spirit of
nonchalance.
Again, there is the tenacious talker, who refuses to release you though
you concede his arguments. When all others tacitly drop a subject, he
eagerly picks it up. He is reluctant to leave it. He would put you in
possession of his special knowledge. You may successfully refute him,
but he holds firmly to his own ideas. He is positive he is right. He
will prove it, too, if you will only listen. He knows that he knows. You
cannot convince him to the contrary, no indeed. He will talk you so
blind that at last you are unable to see any viewpoint clearly.
A recognized type is the tactless talker. He says the wrong thing in
the right way, and the right thing in the wrong way. He is impulsive and
unguarded. He reaches hasty conclusions. He confuses his tactlessness
with cleverness. He is awkward and blundering. His indifference to the
rights and feelings of others is his greatest enemy. He is a stranger to
discretion. He speaks first, and thinks afterwards. He may have regrets,
but not resolutions. He is often tolerated, but seldom esteemed.
The temperamental talker is one of the greatest of nerve-destroyers. He
deals in superlatives. He views everything emotionally. He talks
feelingly of trifles, and ecstatically of friends. He gushes. He
flatters. To him everything is "wonderful," "prodigious," "superb,"
"gorgeous," "heavenly," "amazing," "indescribable," "overwhelming."
Extravagance and exaggeration permeate his most commonplace
observations. He is an incurable enthusiast.
The tantalizing talker is one who likes to contradict you. He divides
his attention between what you are saying and what he can summon to
oppose you. He dissents from your most ordinary observations. His
favorite phrases are, "I don't think so," "There is where you are
wrong," "I beg to differ," and "Not only that." Tell him it will be a
fine day, and he will declare that the signs indicate foul weather. Say
that the day is unpromising, and he will assure you it does not look
that way to him. He cavils at trifles. He disputes even when there is no
antagonist.
To listen to the tortuous talker is a supreme test of patience. He
slowly winds his way in and out of a subject. He traverses by-paths,
allowing nothing to escape his unwearied eye. He goes a long way about,
but never tires of his circuitous journey. Ploddingly and perseveringly
he zigzags from one point to another. He alters his course as often as
the crooked way of his subject changes. He twists, turns, and diverges
without the slightest inconvenience to himself. He likes nothing better
than to trace out details. His talking disease is discursiveness.
The tranquil talker never hurries. He has all the time there is. If you
are very busy he will wait. He is uniformly moderate and polite. He is
a rare combination of oil, milk, and rose-water. He would not harm a
syllable of the English language. His talking has a soporific effect. It
acts as a lullaby. His speech is low and gentle. He never speaks an
ill-considered word. He chooses his words with measured caution. He is
what is known as a smooth talker.
The torpedo talker is of the rapid fire explosive variety. He bursts
into a conversation. He scatters labials, dentals, and gutturals in all
directions. He is a war-time talker,--boom, burst, bang, roar, crash,
thud! He fills the air with vocal bullets and syllabic shrapnel. He is
trumpet-tongued, ear-splitting, deafening. He fires promiscuously at all
his hearers. He rends the skies asunder. He is nothing if not
vociferous, stentorian, lusty. He demolishes every idea in his way. He
is a Napoleon of words.
The tangled talker never gets anything quite straight. He inevitably
spoils the best story. He always begins at the wrong end. Despite your
protests of face and manner he talks on. He talks inopportunely. He
becomes inextricably confused. He is weak in statistics. He has no
memory for names or places. He lacks not fluency but accuracy. He is a
twisted talker.
The triumphant talker lays claim to the star part in any conversation.
He likes nothing better than to drive home his point and then look about
exultingly. He says gleefully, "I told you so." That he can ever be
wrong is inconceivable to him. He knows the facts since he can readily
manufacture them himself. He is self-satisfied, for in his own opinion
he has never lost an argument. He is a brave and bold talker.
These, then, are some types of talking which we should not emulate.
Study the list carefully--the tiresome talker, the trifling talker, the
tedious talker, the tattling talker, the tautological talker, the
tenacious talker, the tactless talker, the temperamental talker, the
tantalizing talker, the tangled talker, the triumphant talker--and guard
yourself diligently against the faults which they represent. Talking
should always be a pleasure to the speaker and listener, never a bore.
TALKERS AND TALKING
Conversation is not a verbal nor vocal contest, but a mutual meeting of
minds. It is not a monologue, but a reciprocal exchange of ideas.
There are cardinal rules which everyone should observe in conversation.
The first of these is to be prepared always to give courteous and
considerate attention to the ideas of others. There is no better way to
cultivate your own conversational powers than to train yourself first to
be an interesting and sympathetic listener.
It is in bad taste to interrupt a speaker. This is a common fault which
should be resolutely guarded against. Moreover, your own opportunity to
speak will shortly come if you have patience, when you may reasonably
expect to receive the same uninterrupted attention which you have given
to others.
Never allow yourself to monopolize a conversation. This is a form of
selfishness practiced by many persons apparently unaware of being
ill-mannered. It is inexcusably bad taste to tell unduly long stories or
lengthy personal experiences. If you cannot abridge a story to
reasonable dimensions, it would be better to omit it entirely. The
habitual long-story teller may easily become a bore.
Avoid the habit of eagerly matching the other person's story or
experience with one of your own. There is nothing more disconcerting to
a speaker than to observe the listener impatiently waiting to plunge
headlong into the conversation with some marvellous tale. Be
particularly careful not to outdo another speaker in relating your own
experiences. If, for instance, he has just told how he caught fifty fish
upon a recent trip, do not succumb to the temptation to tell of the time
you caught fifty-one.
Be careful not to give unsolicited advice. It has been well said that
advice which costs nothing is worth what it costs. If people desire your
counsel they will probably ask for it, in which case they will be more
likely to appreciate what you have to tell them.
Do not voluntarily recommend doctors, dentists, osteopaths, pills,
coffee substitutes, health foods, health resorts, or panaceas for the
ills of mankind. If you can be of service to others in these particular
respects, it will be when you are specifically asked for such
information.
It is most imprudent to carry an argument to extremes. If you observe an
unwillingness in the other person to be convinced by what you say, you
had better turn to another subject. Conversation should never resolve
itself into controversial debate.
It is well to avoid discursiveness, over-use of parentheses, and
positiveness of statement. Keep your desires and feelings from
over-coloring your views. A flexible attitude of mind is more likely to
win an opponent to your way of thinking.
Take special pains to enter into the minds and feelings of others. Be
interested in what they want to talk about. Let your interest be deep
and sincere. Adopt the right tone, temper, and reticence in your
conversation.
You should accustom yourself to look at things from the other person's
standpoint. It is surprising how this habit enlarges the vision and
gives a charitableness to speech which might otherwise be absent. It is
well to remember that no person can possibly have a monopoly of
knowledge upon any subject.
Good conversation demands restraint, adaptability, and reasonable
brevity. There is an appalling waste of words on all sides, hence you
should constantly guard yourself against this fault. When there is
nothing worth-while to say, the best substitute is silence.
Practice self-discipline in talking. Correct any fault in yourself the
instant you recognize it. If, for example, you realize that you are
talking at too great length, stop it at once. Should you feel that you
are not giving interested attention to the speaker, check your
mind-wandering immediately and concentrate upon what is being said.
Do not be always setting other people right. This is a thankless as well
as useless task. They probably do not want your assistance, or they
would ask for it. Besides most people are sensitive about their
shortcomings, and prefer to get help and counsel in private.
There is no more important suggestion than to rule your moods. Ofttimes
the feelings run away with the judgment. What you think and say today
may be due to your present mood, rather than to matured judgment. Let
your common sense predominate at all times.
It is not well to give too strong expression to your likes and dislikes.
These, like all your feelings, should be governed with a firm hand.
Opinions advanced with too much emphasis may easily fail to impress
other minds. Remember always that your greatest ally is truth. Therefore
frankly and faithfully examine your important opinions before giving
them expression.
Resist the desire to be prominent in conversation, or to say clever and
surprising things. This is sometimes difficult to do, but it is the only
safe course to follow. If you have something brilliant or worth-while to
say, it will be best said spontaneously and with due modesty. But if
there is no suitable opportunity to say it, put it back in your mind
where it may improve with age. Egotism is taboo in polite society.
The suggestion that nothing should be allowed to pass the lips that
charity would check is invaluable advice. It is unfortunately all too
common to give hasty and harsh expression to personal opinions and
criticisms. Reticence is one of the most essential conditions of long
friendship.
Judgment and tact are necessary to good conversation. It is not well to
ask many questions, and then only those of a general character.
Curiosity should be curbed. Quite properly people resent
inquisitiveness. The best way to cultivate the rare grace of judgment is
to be mindful of your own faults and to correct them with all speed and
thoroughness.
The word "talk" is often used in a derogatory sense, and we hear such
expressions as "all talk," "empty talk," and "idle talk." But as
everyone talks, we should all do our utmost to set a high example to
others of the correct use of speech.
It is always better to talk too little than too much. Never talk for
mere talking's sake. Avoid being artificial or pedantic. Don't
antagonize, dogmatize, moralize, attitudinize, nor criticise. Talk in
poise,--quietly, deliberately, sincerely, and you will never lack an
attentive audience.
PHRASES FOR TALKERS
It is said of Macaulay that he never allowed a sentence to pass muster
until it was as good as he could make it. He would write and rewrite,
and even construct a paragraph or a whole chapter, in order to secure a
more lucid and satisfactory arrangement. He wrote just so much each day,
usually an average of six pages, and this manuscript was so erased and
corrected that it was finally compressed into two pages of print.
The masters of English prose have been great workers. Stevenson and
others like him gave hours and days to the study of words, phrases, and
sentences. Through unwearied application to the art of rhetorical
composition they ultimately won fame as writers.
The ambitious student of speech culture, whether for use in conversation
or in public, will do well to emulate the example of such great
writers. One of the best ways to build a large vocabulary is to note
useful and striking phrases in one's general reading. It is advisable to
jot down such phrases in a note-book, and to read them aloud from time
to time. Such phrases may be classified according to their particular
application,--to business, politics, music, education, literature, or
the drama.
It is not recommended that such phrases should be consciously dragged
into conversation, but the practice of carefully observing felicitous
phrases, and of noting them in writing, cultivates the taste for better
words and a sense of discrimination in their use. Many phrases noted and
studied in this way will unconsciously find their way into one's
expression.
The list of phrases which follows is offered as merely suggestive. In
reading the phrases aloud it is well to think clearly what each one
means, and to fit it into a sentence of one's own making. This simple
exercise, practiced for a few weeks, will produce surprising results by
way of increased facility and flexibility of English style.
It is obviously desirable
I can well imagine
Broadly speaking
An admirable idea
In a literal sense
By sheer force of genius
You can imagine his chagrin
I hazard a guess
It challenges belief
He has an inscrutable face
Very fertile in resource
I am loath to believe
It is essentially undignified
Example is so contagious
I am not in her confidence
Taken in the aggregate
It is a reproof to shallowness
There is a misconception here
I strongly suspect it so
He was covered with confusion
It was a just rebuke
A pleasing instance of this
It lends dignity to life
She has a desultory liking for music
It seems incredible
A kind of detached ideal
It blunts the finer sensibilities
Beyond question or cavil
A well-founded suspicion
It has elicited great praise
They are landmarks in memory
Superhuman vigor and activity
A venerable and interesting figure
It is curious and interesting
Gives the impression of aloofness
Perfectly void of offence
Regard with misgiving
A stroke of professional luck
An unscrupulous adventurer
He spoke with extreme reticence
Robust common sense
Deficient in amiability
Done with characteristic thoroughness
A vein of philanthropic zeal
Definite, tangible, and practical
Too much effusive declamation
A man of keen ambition
It gives infinite zest
Singular qualifications for public life
They are bitterly hostile
The despair of the official wire-puller
Blind and unreasoning opponent
Ignoble strife for power
Surrounded by a cohort of admiring friends
In an imperative voice
Marked by copiousness and vivacity
Touched with sombre dignity
A ridiculous misconception
Habitual austerity of demeanor
Ostentation and lavish expenditure
A person of exquisite tact
Intolerant of bumptiousness
The obvious danger of dallying
This was grossly overstated
A mass of calumny and exaggeration
Inimical to religion
Fraught with peril
I venture to ask
Attributed to mental decrepitude
A strange phenomena
It argues a blind faith
Insatiable whirl of excitement
A substratum of truth
Under some conceivable circumstances
Bubbling over with infectious joy
Frigid dignity and arrogant reserve
A profound contempt
The fine art of hospitality
Grim morsels of philosophy
A tinge of sorrowness and jealousy
Due to ignorance and barbarism
Grave and monstrous scandal
A splendid instance of self-devotion
Amusingly exemplified in this case
Recognized and powerful element
A symbol of restraint
An utterly fallacious idea
In rapid and striking succession
We learn from stern experience
Pictures of an inspired imagination
An astonishing outbreak
Soothing words of sympathy
A rather bold assertion
The most enthusiastic adherents
Mere tepid conviction
Eminently qualified for the task
Almost supernatural charm
In glowing and exaggerated phrases
Somewhat rich and austere
An inexhaustible theme
Grave and undeniable faults
Perfectly chosen language
All the characteristics of a mob
Given to grandiloquent phrase
Peculiar vein of sarcasm
Froze like ice and cut like steel
A generous tribute to an eminent rival
Cold and stately composure
Fiery and passionate enthusiasm
Extraordinary violence of nature
A brilliant and delightful play
Rare and striking combination
Preeminently qualified for the part
Moderate and cautious conservatism
Daring perversions of justice
Devoid of rhetorical device
As a great thinker has observed
Almost morbid sensitiveness
Discreetly stifled yawn
He was dumb with wonder
Scarcely less familiar
Delightfully characteristic
It was a profound conviction
Greatly conceived and expressed
Blinded by its brightness
I have cudgelled my memory
Exposed to imminent peril
Screening a breach of etiquette
By a natural transition
Splendid anticipations of success
A very laudable attempt
Lapsed into complete oblivion
With most distinguished success
Like embarking on a shoreless sea
A really pretty imitation
Unless I greatly err
Undaunted by repeated failure
Became a term of reproach
An epoch-making achievement
In the guise of verbal nonsense
Received with cordial sympathy
With the most obvious sincerity
Held forth with fluency and zest
Gracious solicitude
Punctiliously civil and polite
An air of sphinx-like mystery
Consumed by zeal
Awaited with lively interest
Sledge-hammer blows against humbug
This recalls a happy retort
Preeminently a case in point
Exquisite precision and finish
Incomparably better informed
A keen eye for incongruities
Polite to the point of deference
To the last degree improbable
People with rampant prejudices
A model of chivalrous propriety
By way of digression
A splendid acquisition
Singularly attractive fashion
A kind of unconscious conspiracy
Amid engrossing demands
THE SPEAKING VOICE
There is a widespread need for a more thorough cultivation of the
speaking voice. It is astonishing how few persons give specific
attention to this important subject. On all sides we are subjected to
voices that are disagreeable and strident. It is the exception to hear a
voice that is musical and well-modulated.
Most people make too much physical effort in speaking. They tighten the
muscles of the throat and mouth, instead of liberating these muscles and
allowing the voice to flow naturally and harmoniously. The remedy for
this common fault of vocal tension is to relax all the muscles used in
speech. This is easily accomplished by means of a little daily practice.
The first thing to keep in mind is that we should speak through the
throat and not from it. A musical quality of voice depends chiefly upon
directing the tone towards the hard palate, or the bony arch above the
upper teeth. From this part of the mouth the voice acquires much of its
resonance.
An excellent exercise for throat relaxation is yawning. It is not
necessary to wait until a real yawn presents itself, but frequent
practice in imitating a yawn may be indulged in with good results.
Immediately after practicing the yawn, it is advisable to test the
voice, either in speaking or in reading, to observe improvement in
freedom of tone.
It is not desirable to use the voice where there is loud noise by way of
opposition. Many a good voice has been ruined due to the habit of
continuous talking on the street or elsewhere amid clatter and hubbub.
Under such circumstances it is better to rest the voice, since in any
contest of the kind the voice will almost surely be vanquished.
What we need in our daily conversation is less emphasis, and more
quietness and non-resistance. We need less eagerness and more vivacity
and variety. We need a settled equanimity of mind that does not deprive
us of our animation, but saves us from the petty irritations of
everyday life. We need, in short, more poise and self-control in our way
of speaking.
It is well to remember that few things we say are of such importance as
to require emphasis. The thought should be its own recommendation. But
if emphasis be necessary, let it be by the intellectual means of pausing
or inflection, rather than with the shoulders or the clenched fist.
A very disagreeable and common fault is nasality, or "talking through
the nose." Many persons are guilty of this who least suspect it. This
habit is so easily and unconsciously acquired that everyone should be on
strict guard against it. Almost equally disagreeable is the fault of
throatiness, caused by holding the muscles of the throat instead of
relaxing them.
The best tones of the speaking voice are the middle and low keys. These
should be used exclusively in daily conversation. The use of high pitch
is due to habit or temperament, but may be overcome through judicious
practice. The objection to a high-keyed voice is not only that it is
disagreeable to the listener, but puts the speaker "out of tune" with
his audience.
A good speaking voice should possess the qualities of purity, resonance,
flexibility, roundness, brilliancy, and adequate power. These qualities
can be rapidly developed by daily reading aloud for ten minutes, giving
special attention to one quality at a time. A few weeks, assiduous
practice will produce most gratifying results. The voice grows through
use, and it grows precisely in the way it is habitually used.
Distinct articulation and correct pronunciation are indications of
cultivated speech. Pedantry should be avoided, but every aspirant to
correct speech should be a student of the dictionary. A writer has given
this good counsel:
"Resolve that you will never use an incorrect, an inelegant, or a vulgar
phrase or word, in any society whatever. If you are gifted with wit, you
will soon find that it is easy to give it far better point and force in
pure English than through any other medium, and that brilliant thoughts
make the deepest impressions when well worded. However great it may be,
the labor is never lost which earns for you the reputation of one who
habitually uses the language of a gentleman, or of a lady. It is
difficult for those who have not frequent opportunities for conversation
with well-educated people, to avoid using expressions which are not
current in society, although they may be of common occurrence in books.
As they are often learned from novels, it will be well for the reader to
remember that even in the best of such works dialogues are seldom
sustained in a tone which would not appear affected in ordinary life.
This fault in conversation is the most difficult of all to amend, and it
is unfortunately the one to which those who strive to express themselves
correctly are peculiarly liable. Its effect is bad, for though it is not
like slang, vulgar in itself, it betrays an effort to conceal vulgarity.
It may generally be remedied by avoiding any word or phrase which you
may suspect yourself of using for the purpose of creating an effect.
Whenever you imagine that the employment of any mere word or sentence
will convey the impression that you are well informed, substitute for
it some simple expression. If you are not positively certain as to the
pronunciation of a word, never use it. If the temptation be great,
resist it; for, rely upon it, if there be in your mind the slightest
doubt on the subject, you will certainly make a mistake. Never use a
foreign word when its meaning can be given in English, and remember that
it is both rude and silly to say anything to any person who possibly may
not understand it. But never attempt, under any circumstances whatever,
to utter a foreign word, unless you have learned to pronounce correctly
the language to which it belongs."
There is need for the admonition to open the mouth well. Many people
speak with half-closed teeth, the result being that the quality of voice
and correctness of pronunciation are greatly impaired. Consonants and
vowels should be given proper significance. Muffled speech is almost as
objectionable as stammering.
It enhances the pleasure and quality of conversation to speak in
deliberate style. Rapidity of utterance often leads a speaker into such
faults as indistinctness, monotony, and incorrect breathing. Deliberate
speaking confers many advantages, not the least of which is increased
pleasure to the listener.
Many voices are too thin in quality. They fail to carry conviction even
when the thought is of superior character. The remedy here is to give
special attention to the development of deep tones. One of the best
exercises for this purpose is to practice for a few minutes daily upon
the vowel sound "O," endeavoring to make it full, deep, and melodious.
For all-round vocal development this practice should be done with varied
force and inflection, and on high as well as low keys of the voice.
The best remedy for a weak voice is to practice daily upon explosives,
expelling the principal vowel sounds, on various keys, using the
abdominal muscles throughout. Another good exercise is to read aloud
while walking upstairs or uphill. As these exercises are somewhat
extreme, the student is recommended to practice them prudently.
Correct breathing is fundamental to correct and agreeable speaking. The
breathing apparatus should be brought under control by daily practice
upon exercises prescribed in any standard book on elocution. Pure tone
of voice depends upon the ability to convert into tone every particle of
breath used. Aspirated voice, in which some of the breath is allowed to
escape unvocalized, is injurious to the throat, and unpleasant to the
listening ear.
The speaker, whether in conversation or in public, should try always to
speak with an adequate supply of breath. Deliberate utterance will give
the necessary opportunity to replenish the lungs, so that the speaker
will not suffer from unnecessary fatigue. Needless to say, the habit
should be formed of breathing through the nose when in repose.
There is a voice of unusual roundness and fulness known as the orotund,
which is indispensable to the public speaker. It is simple, pure tone,
rounded out into greater fulness. It is produced mainly by an increased
resonance of the chest and mouth cavities, and a more vigorous action of
the abdominal muscles. It has the character of fulness, but it is not
necessarily a loud tone. It is in no sense artificial, but simply an
enlargement of the natural conversational voice.
The use of the orotund voice varies according to the intensity of the
thought and feeling being expressed. It is used in language of great
dignity, power, grandeur, and sublimity. It is appropriate in certain
forms of public prayer and Bible reading. It enables the public speaker
to vary from his conversational style. It gives vastly increased scope
and power, by enabling the speaker to bring into play all the resources
of vocal force and intensity.
Where resonance of voice is lacking, it can be rapidly developed by
means of humming the letter _m_, with lips closed, and endeavoring to
make the face vibrate. The tone should be kept well forward throughout
the exercise, pressing firmly against the lips and hard palate. Later
the exercise may begin with the humming _m_, and be developed, while the
lips are opened gradually, into the tone of _ah_, still aiming to
maintain the original resonance.
The speaking voice is capable of most wonderful development. There is a
duty devolving upon everyone to cultivate beauty of vocal utterance and
diction. Crudities of speech so commonly in evidence are mainly due to
carelessness and neglect. It is a hopeful sign, however, that greater
attention is now being given to this important subject than heretofore.
Surely there is nothing more important than the development of the
principal instrument by which men communicate with one another. As Story
says:
"O, how our organ can speak with its many and wonderful voices!--
Play on the soft lute of love, blow the loud trumpet of war,
Sing with the high sesquialter, or, drawing its full diapason,
Shake all the air with the grand storm of its pedals and stops."
HOW TO TELL A STORY
Someone has wittily said that only those in their anecdotage should tell
stories. De Quincey wanted all story-tellers to be submerged in a
horse-pond, or treated in the same manner as mad dogs. But story-telling
has its legitimate and appropriate use, and if certain rules are
observed may give added charm to conversation and public speaking.
It requires a fine discrimination to know when to tell a story, and when
not to tell one though it is urging itself to be expressed. Few men have
the rare gift of choosing the right story for the particular occasion.
Many men have no difficulty in telling stories that are insufferably
long, pointless, and uninteresting.
We have all been victims of a certain type of public speaker who begins
by saying, "Now I don't want to bore you with a long story, but this is
so good, etc.," or "An incident occurred at the American Consulate in
Shanghai, which reminds me of an awfully good story, etc." When a
speaker prefaces his remarks with some such sentences as these, we know
we are in for an uncomfortable time.
As far as possible a story should be new, clever, short, simple,
inoffensive, and appropriate. As such stories are scarce, it is
advisable to set them down, when found, in a special note-book for
convenient reference. It is said that Chauncey M. Depew, one of the most
gifted of after-dinner speakers, was for many years in the habit of
keeping a set of scrap-books in which were preserved stories and other
interesting data clipped from newspapers and magazines. These were so
classified that he could on short notice refresh his mind with ample
material upon almost any general subject.
Anyone who essays to tell a story should have it clearly in mind. It is
fatal for a speaker to hesitate midway in a story, apologize for not
knowing it better, avow that it was much more humorous when told to him,
and in other ways to announce his shortcomings. If he cannot tell a
story fluently and interestingly, he should first practice it on his own
family--provided they will tolerate it.
Some stories should be committed to memory, especially where the point
of humor depends upon exact phraseology. In such case, it requires some
training and experience to disguise the memorized effort. A story like
the following, for obvious reasons, should be thoroughly memorized:
The longest sermon on record occupied three hours and a half. But the
shortest sermon was that of a preacher who spoke for one minute on the
text: "Man is born unto trouble as the sparks fly upward." He said:
"I shall divide my discourse into three heads: (1) Man's ingress into
the world; (2) His progress through the world; (3) His egress out of the
world.
"Firstly, His ingress into the world is naked and bare.
"Secondly, His progress through the world is trouble and care.
"Thirdly, His egress out of the world is nobody knows where.
"To conclude:
"If we live well here, we shall live well there.
"I can tell you no more if I preach a whole year.
"The collection will now be taken up."
Dialect stories are usually rather difficult, and should not as a
general thing be attempted by beginners. As a matter of fact, few
persons know how to speak such dialects as Irish, Scotch, German,
Cockney, and negro without undue exaggeration. For most occasions it is
well to keep to simple stories couched in plain English.
A story should be told in simple, conversational style. Concentration
upon the story, and a sincere desire to give pleasure to the hearers,
will keep the speaker free from self-consciousness. Needless to say he
should not be the first to laugh at his own story. Sometimes in telling
a humorous anecdote to an audience a speaker secures the greatest effect
by maintaining an expression of extreme gravity.
No matter how successful one may be in telling stories, he should avoid
telling too many. A man who is accounted brilliant and entertaining may
become an insufferable bore by continuing to tell stories when the
hearers have become satiated. Of all speakers, the story-teller should
keep his eyes on his entire audience and be alert to detect the
slightest signs of weariness.
It is superfluous to say that a story should never be told which in any
way might give offence. The speaker may raise a laugh, but lose a
friend. Hence it is that stories about stammerers, red-headed people,
mothers-in-law, and the like, should always be chosen with
discrimination.
Generally the most effective story is one in which the point of humor is
not disclosed until the very last words, as in the following:
An old colored man was brought up before a country judge.
"Jethro," said the judge, "you are accused of stealing General Johnson's
chickens. Have you any witnesses?"
"No, sah," old Jethro answered, haughtily; "I hab not, sah. I never
steal chickens befo' witnesses."