Hopalong and his companion rode into Muddy Wells at noon, and Red
Connors, who leaned with Buck Peters against the side of Tom Lee's
saloon, gasped his astonishment. Buck looked twice to be sure, and then
muttered incredulously: “What th' heck!” Red repeated the phrase and
retreated within the saloon, while Buck stood his ground, having
had much experience with women, inasmuch as he had narrowly escaped
marrying. He thought that he might as well get all the information
possible, and waited for an introduction. It was in vain, however, for
the two rode past without noticing him.
Buck watched them turn the corner and then called for Red to come out,
but that person, fearing an ordeal, made no reply and the foreman went
in after him. The timorous one was corraling bracers at the bar and
nearly swallowed down the wrong channel when Buck placed a heavy hand on
his broad shoulder.
“G'way!” remarked Red. “I don't want no introduction, none whatever,” he
asserted. “G'way!” he repeated, backing off suspiciously.
“Better wait 'til yu are asked,” suggested Buck. “Better wait 'til yu
sees th' rope afore yu duck.” Then he laughed: “Yu bashful fellers make
me plumb disgusted. Why, I've seen yu face a bunch of guns an never turn
a hair, an' here yore all in because yu fear yu'll have to stand
around an' hide yore hands. She won't bite yu. Anyway, from what I saw,
Hopalong is due to be her grub--he never saw me at all, th' chump.”
“He shore didn't see me, none,” replied Red with distinct relief. “Are
they gone?”
“Shore,” answered Buck. “An' if they wasn't they wouldn't see us, not
if we stood in front of them an' yelled. She's a hummer-stands two hands
under him an' is a whole lot prettier than that picture Cowan has got
over his bar. There's nothing th' matter with his eyesight, but he's
plumb locoed, all th' same. He'll go an' get stuck on her an' then
she'll hit th' trail for home an' mamma, an' he won't be worth his feed
for a year.” Then he paused in consternation: “Thunder, Red: he's got to
shoot to-morrow!”
“Well, suppose he has?” Responded Red. “I don't reckon she'll stampede
his gun-play none.
“Yu don't reckon, eh?” Queried Buck with much irony. “No, an' that's
what's th' matter with yu. Why, do yu expect to see him to-morrow? Yu
won't if I knows him an' I reckon I do. Nope, he'll be follerin' her all
around.”
“He's got sand to burn,” remarked Red in awe. “Wonder how he got to know
her?”
“Yu can gamble she did th' introducing part--he ain't got th' nerve to
do it himself. He saved her life, or she thinks he did, or some romantic
nonsense like that. So yu better go around an' get him away, an' keep
him away, too.”
“Who, me?” Inquired Red in indignation. “Me go around an' tote him off?
I ain't no wagon: yu go, or send Johnny.”
“Johnny would say something real pert an' get knocked into th' middle
of next week for it. He won't do, so I reckon yu better go yoreself,”
responded Buck, smiling broadly and moving off.
“Hey, yu! Wait a minute!” cried Red in consternation. Buck paused and
Red groped for an excuse: “Why don't you send Billy?” He blurted in
desperation.
The foreman's smile assumed alarming proportions and he slapped his
thigh in joy: “Good boy!” he laughed. “Billy's th' man--good Lord, but
won't he give Cupid cold feet! Rustle around an' send th' pessimistic
soul to me.”
Red, grinning and happy, rapidly visited door after door, shouted, “Hey,
Billy!” and proceeded to the next one. He was getting pugnacious at
his lack of success when he espied Mr. Billy Williams tacking along the
accidental street as if he owned it. Mr. Williams was executing fancy
steps and was trying to sing many songs at once.
Red stopped and grabbed his bibulous friend as that person veered to
starboard: “Yore a peach of a life-preserver, yu are!” he exclaimed.
Billy balanced himself, swayed back and forth and frowned his
displeasure at this unwarranted action: “I ain't no wife-deserter!” he
shouted. “Unrope me an' give me th' trail! No tenderfoot can ride me!”
Then he recognized his friend and grinned joyously: “Shore I will, but
only one. Jus' one more, jus' one more. Yu see, m'friend, it was all
Jimmy's fault. He--”
Red secured a chancery hold and dragged his wailing and remonstrating
friend to Buck, who frowned with displeasure.
“This yere,” said Red in belligerent disgust, “is th' dod-blasted hero
what's a-goin' to save Hopalong from a mournful future. What are we
a-goin' to do?”
Buck slipped the Colt's from Billy's holster and yanked the erring one
to his feet: “Fill him full of sweet oil, source him in th' trough, walk
him around for awhile an' see what it does,” he ordered.
Two hours later Billy walked up to his foreman and weakly asked what was
wanted. He looked as though he had just been released from a six-months'
stay in a hospital.
“Yu go over to th' hotel an' find Hopalong,” said the foreman sternly.
“Stay with him all th' time, for there is a plot on foot to wing him on
th' sly. If yu ain't mighty spry he'll be dead by night.”
Having delivered the above instructions and prevarications, Buck
throttled the laugh which threatened to injure him and scowled at Red,
who again fled into the saloon for fear of spoiling it all with revealed
mirth.
The convalescent stared in open-mouthed astonishment:
“What's he doin' in th' hotel, an' who's goin' to plug him?” He asked.
“Yu leave that to me,” replied Buck, “All yu has to do is to get on th'
job with yore gun,” handing the weapon to him, “an' freeze to him like
a flea on a cow. Mebby there'll be a woman in th' game, but that ain't
none of yore funeral--yu do what I said.”
“Blast th' women!” exploded Billy, moving off. When he had entered the
hotel Buck went in to Red.
“For Pete's sake!” moaned that person in senseless reiteration. “Th'
Lord help Billy! Holy Mackinaw!” he shouted. “Gimme a drink an' let me
tell th' boys.”
The members of the outfit were told of the plot and they gave their
uproarious sanction, all needing bracers to sustain them.
Billy found the clerk swapping lies with the bartender and, procuring
the desired information, climbed the stairs and hunted for room No. 6.
Discovering it, he dispensed with formality, pushed open the door and
entered.
He found his friend engaged in conversation with a pretty young
woman, and on a couch at the far side of the room lay an elderly
white-whiskered gentleman who was reading a magazine. Billy felt like a
criminal for a few seconds and then there came to him the thought that
his was a mission of great import and he braced himself to face any
ordeal. “Anyway,” he thought, “th' prettier they are th' more dust they
can raise.”
“What are yu doing here?” Cried Hopalong in amazement.
“That's all right,” averred the protector, confidentially.
“What's all right?”
“Why, everything,” replied Billy, feeling uncomfortable.
The elderly man hastily sat up and dropped his magazine when he saw
the armed intruder, his eyes as wide open as his mouth. He felt for
his spectacles, but did not need them, for he could see nothing but the
Colt's which Billy jabbed at him.
“None of that!” snapped Billy. “'ands up!” he ordered, and the hands went
up so quick that when they stopped the jerk shook the room. Peering over
the gentleman's leg, Billy saw the spectacles and backed to the wall
as he apologized: “It's shore on me, Stranger--I reckoned yu was
contemplatin' some gun-play.”
Hopalong, blazing with wrath, arose and shoved Billy toward the hail,
when Mr. Johnny Nelson, oozing fight and importance, intruded his person
into the zone of action.
“Lord!” ejaculated the newcomer, staring at the vision of female
loveliness which so suddenly greeted him. “Mamma,” he added under his
breath. Then he tore off his sombrero: “Come out of this, Billy, yu
chump!” he exploded, backing toward the door, being followed by the
protector.
Hopalong slammed the door and turned to his hostess, apologizing for the
disturbance.
“Who are they?” Palpitated Miss Deane.
“What the deuce are they doing up here!” blazed her father. Hopalong
disclaimed any knowledge of them and just then Billy opened the door and
looked in.
“There he is again!” cried Miss Deane, and her father gasped. Hopalong
ran out into the hall and narrowly missed kicking Billy into Kingdom
Come as that person slid down the stairs, surprised and indignant.
Mr. Billy Williams, who sat at the top of the stairs, was feeling hungry
and thirsty when he saw his friend, Mr. Pete Wilson, the slow witted,
approaching.
“Hey, Pete,” he called, “come up here an' watch this door while I
rustles some grub. Keep yore eyes open,” he cautioned.
As Pete began to feel restless the door opened and a dignified gentleman
with white whiskers came out into the hall and then retreated with great
haste and no dignity. Pete got the drop on the door and waited. Hopalong
yanked it open and kissed the muzzle of the weapon before he could stop,
and Pete grinned.
“Coming to th' fight?” He loudly asked. “It's going to be a shore 'nough
sumptious scrap--just th' kind yu allus like. Come on, th' boys are
waitin' for yu.”
“Keep quiet!” hissed Hopalong.
“What for?” Asked Pete in surprise. “Didn't yu say yu shore wanted to
see that scrap?”
“Shut yore face an' get scarce, or yu'll go home in cans!”
As Hopalong seated himself once more Red strolled up to the door and
knocked. Hopalong ripped it open and Red, looking as fierce and worried
as he could, asked Hopalong if he was all right. Upon being assured by
smoking adjectives that he was, the caller looked relieved and turned
thoughtfully away.
“Hey, yu! Come here!” called Hopalong.
Red waved his hand and said that he had to meet a man and clattered
down the stairs. Hopalong thought that he, also, had to meet a man and,
excusing himself, hastened after his friend and overtook him in the
Street, where he forced a confession. Returning to his hostess he told
her of the whole outrage, and she was angry at first, but seeing the
humorous side of it, she became convulsed with laughter. Her father
re-read his paragraph for the thirteenth time and then, slamming the
magazine on the floor, asked how many times he was expected to read ten
lines before he knew what was in them, and went down to the bar.
Miss Deane regarded her companion with laughing eyes and then became
suddenly sober as he came toward her.
“Go to your foreman and tell him that you will shoot to-morrow, for I
will see that you do, and I will bring luck to the Bar-20. Be sure to
call for me at one o'clock: I will be ready.”
He hesitated, bowed, and slowly departed, making his way to Tom Lee's,
where his entrance hushed the hilarity which had reigned. Striding
to where Buck stood, he placed his hands on his hips and searched the
foreman's eyes.
Buck smiled: “Yu ain't mad, are yu?” He asked.
Hopalong relaxed: “No, but blame near it.”
Red and the others grabbed him from the rear, and when he had been
“buffaloed” into good humor he threw them from him, laughed and waved
his hand toward the bar:
“Come up, yu sons-of-guns. Yore a cussed nuisance sometimes, but yore a
bully gang all th' same.”