HONG, the massive, burly gate-keeper of the British Consulate, was a
very familiar figure to all in the settlement. In his wide, baggy, white
pantaloons, thick felt-soled shoes, white wide-sleeved jacket with a red
crown on each arm, and white round hat with a red silk fringe spreading
over its conical crown, he made a not unimposing figure.
His large healthy-looking face was generally impassive, but he showed no
cringing servility in his honest gaze, and one might occasionally catch
a glimpse of humour in his always polite but generally inscrutable
countenance. There were times when the humorous eyes took on a more
pronounced twinkle, and when the big honest face assumed the kind,
protecting mien of some faithful dog—this was when he had children to
talk to and pester him. None knew him better than the white children of
the settlement, and of these Jack, the eight-year-old son of the Consul,
and Dorothy, the five-yeared daughter, were treated by the gigantic Hong
with a reverence and love almost amounting to worship.
Dorothy, with her yellow curls and wide blue eyes, was loved by
everyone, and Jack, with his brave boy’s ways, could not fail to attract
the notice of any passing stranger. Passengers alighting from the
steamers always asked their friends, “Whose are those beautiful
children?”
To Jack, Hong always seemed to possess some romantic mystery, and he
pictured him as having been a pirate, or, perhaps, one of the
redoubtable Tai Pings. In the gate-house he always kept a large sword, a
weapon made either for theatrical or processional purposes, but round
this weapon Master Jack had woven volumes of romance, so much so that he
regarded the weapon as something that it would be indelicate or
inquisitive for him to demand of Hong the history.
Both Jack and Dorothy understood and spoke the local dialect, but Hong
was very particular to make his morning salutations in pidgin-English,
and then, if any story were forthcoming, it was told in the vernacular,
which, for the sake of our readers, we will translate.
Thus Master Jack: “Morning, Hong; blong velly hot, my tink.”
“Morning, Master Jack; morning, Missis Dolothy. My tink plenty hot
bymby. This time no blong too hot.”
“Hong, you ever cachee torture? Cachee bamboo beating, or so fashion
thing?” says Jack.
Hong’s face is almost lit up with a smile, but with imperturbable
gravity he replies that he was once sentenced to a painful death, and
that part of the sentence was carried out.
“Tell us at once,” says Jack; but Dorothy pouts and says, “Hong, baby no
wanchee hollible stoly; s’pose you speakee hollible ting, baby go away.”
Hong’s face became at once serious as he says, “No, Missis, Hong no
speakee hollible stoly; s’pose like hear he tell stoly of old time
custom. No blong hollible.”
The wide-eyed Dorothy being reassured, she and Jack sit on the bench by
the gate, while Hong relates as follows:—
“Many years ago, before either of your honourable selves was born, this
person lived in Chin Wen Fu in Foh Kien. The honourable Hop Li was
tao-tai, and many gentle and pleasant amusements could be enjoyed in
Chin Wen. The person who tells this was very fond of visiting the
theatres, and, being a big strong youth, would occasionally take part in
trials of strength in public places, and had, on occasion, appeared on
the public stage in processions and such spectacles where a big man was
needed to represent an emperor, a general, or some other person of
importance.
“Now it happened that at one time a travelling company of actors came to
our town, and while the stage was being erected one of their company
fell sick and died. They were going to perform a very popular and
amusing drama, in which much depended on the performance of one
character, who, as tao-tai, becomes very drunk, thus causing numerous
complications. After some considerable haggling it was at last decided
that this person should play the part—my figure and deportment were
suitable, and as the spoken words were not very numerous, I was fit to
take the part by the time the performance was opened.
“Our tao-tai, Hop Li, was a short man, but by putting cushions under my
coat, and a false moustache on my lip, I made myself resemble him to the
life. My first appearance proved a great success, my drunken scene
evoking much merriment from the audience, and the next night the house
was crammed. That night the audience made me repeat the drunken scene,
and the next night they wanted it three times. I began to get a little
conceited, and suggested to the manager that I should be paid for my
performance or I would not play, and he, knowing that the success of the
play now entirely depended upon me, and that my performances were
bringing him crowded houses every night, assented. The audiences became
more and more enthusiastic over my drunken scene, and I began to
introduce innovations. I had a horse brought on the stage and mounted it
in a fashion not unlike our tao-tai, who was no rider and very nervous.
This brought the house down, and things got to such a pitch that the
manager offered me many taels to make my particular business last for
three hours. It was hard work, but I did it. For three hours every night
I acted that I was drunk. I mounted horses, I gave ridiculous judgments
in the courts, I fought, I dined—in fact, I did everything I could to
please. The fame of this performance was so noised about that it came to
the ears of our own tao-tai, and he decided to see the play himself—an
unfortunate thing for me.
“I think on the night of the tao-tai’s visit to the theatre I surpassed
myself. I was more amusing than usual. I ordered new horses, new
witnesses, new prisoners. I was three and three-quarter hours getting
drunk, and all the time the tao-tai watched me. That night, I think, I
had taken especial care of my make-up, for I was a life-like
representation of Hop Li, and the audience were like people possessed.
“Missis Dolly, the next morning was tellible.
“The congratulations of my friends had kept me up most of the night,
and, when in a very deep sleep, the next morning I was roughly pulled
off the ‘kang’ on which I lay by two of the runners from the tao-tai’s
Yamen.
“I was not brought before the magistrate, but was taken to a small room
in the Yamen and carefully guarded. I could learn nothing from my
gaolers except that the tao-tai was very angry, and that all theatrical
performances had been stopped. For seven days I was kept closely guarded
in that room, and during the whole time I was well and liberally fed; at
the end of the period I was brought before the tao-tai. In many
long-winded and high-sounding phrases he pointed out what a disgustingly
despicable and mean person I was, that the mere attempt to hold up to
ridicule any of the servants of the Son of Heaven was a crime that could
not be too severely dealt with, that although I had signally failed in
this my attempt to ridicule a tao-tai, still, as an example to others,
my punishment should be a severe one,—that I should be trodden to death
by countless feet.
“I was then taken back to my prison, and, as before, continued to be
well fed. The same day the news came to me that the tao-tai had ordered
a theatre of extreme magnificence to be built of bamboo and matting, all
the previous actors were commanded to perform, an order was issued that
every able-bodied man, woman, and child was to attend the performance,
which would take place on the seventh of the seventh moon, and, finally,
that their magistrate, the tao-tai himself, would perform the part in
which I had previously scored such a success. A further order was issued
the same evening that bare feet or soft shoes were _de rigueur_ for all
who attended the performance. I failed to see how these matters could
interest me, and even when my gaolers told me that the tao-tai was word
perfect in his part, and had introduced lots of new ‘business,’ I failed
to show more than a polite interest.
“As soon, however, as the day of the performance dawned, I saw that the
affair was one of the deepest importance to me. At daybreak my gaolers
led me out to the hard sandy plain on which the theatre stood. The
building itself was of enormous proportions, with two fine dragons
fighting for a bright red sun on the roof. The matting forming the front
was brightly painted, representing famous heroes of the past; all round
were booths with hot rice, soups, pea-nuts, samshu, jellies, and
sweetmeats for sale.
“The unusual feature of this theatre was that it had but one entrance,
which was approached by such a narrow passage that it allowed of only
one person passing at a time. It was not long before I discovered the
reason for this. My guards took me to the middle of this narrow passage,
where there were four stakes driven into the earth, and then, making me
lie on my back, they lashed my ankles and wrists flat on the ground. The
play was to commence at seven in the morning and continue until nine at
night, and soon after I had been securely bound in position the would-be
spectators began to arrive. Their surprise was great on finding that
there was no means of entering the theatre except by walking on me, but
they all made suitable apologies, and I, in my turn, begged them not to
mention it, so that the first few hundred passed over me fairly
comfortably; but as the time for the performance drew near they came
more thickly, apologies were dispensed with, and I thought that I should
be surely killed. The majority of them, it is true, tried to tread on my
chest, but some were old and blind, and these trod on my face or
anywhere, and the suffocating dust nearly stifled me. I was afraid to
breathe, as if I relaxed my chest I feared that my ribs would be crushed
in, and during the last four minutes before the play began some twelve
hundred people rushed over my body. So exhausted was I that I feared I
should die, but soon the guards came and revived me with tea and rice.
After that for some hours I was entirely alone, and by the continued
laughter from the theatre, I judged that the tao-tai was acquitting
himself well.
“As the sun mounted higher in the heavens I had dozed off, but was
suddenly aroused by the honourable Hop Li himself. He seemed annoyed
that I was still alive, and after delivering me a neat and
carefully-worded oration on my disgraceful insubordination in still
living after the punishment I had undergone, he proceeded to the booths
outside where food of all kinds could be purchased. He there bought
everything eatable and returned to the theatre, where he announced from
the stage that there would be an interval of seven minutes, during which
time free meals would be served at the stalls outside, and at the
resumption of the performance he would repeat his drunken scene,
undertaking to make it last four hours, and that in that time he would
get genuinely drunk as a special compliment to the audience.
“The sympathies of the audience were undoubtedly with me, but the
prospect of a free meal and the spectacle of their tao-tai intoxicated
were so alluring that the finer feelings of my fellow-townsmen were for
the moment blunted. Out they came helter-skelter. It was no time for
apologies, food was at the other end, so over my poor body rushed the
entire audience. It seemed only a few seconds since the last feet
pounded my unfortunate body, when a gong sounded, and back rushed
everyone, their mouths stuffed with roast duck, stewed pork, rice, melon
seeds, fish, ginger, prunes, hardbake, macaroni—in fact, every eatable
imaginable.
“I fainted. When I recovered it was getting dusk, the theatre was still
full, but I ceased to take much interest. My guards again gave me food,
and at the conclusion of the performance again the people passed over my
bruised body, but on this occasion they did it quietly and without much
discomfort to the miserable being pegged down in their pathway.
“Then came the tao-tai. He wished to walk on me himself, but he was so
drunk that he was unable to do so, and I was taken back to my prison in
the Yamen bruised and exhausted. I slept till late the next day, and the
tao-tai, who had made himself a martyr to art in order to personate a
drunken man to perfection, slept late too.
“He woke about noon feeling very ill, but still burning with rage
against my insignificant self. His first act was to issue an order that
everyone should attend the theatre at four o’clock that afternoon, and
the proclamation also stated that the most honourable and
universally-loved tao-tai would occupy the stage for four hours, that,
in addition to mounting horses, he would attempt to bestride a camel
after drinking sixteen bottles of samshu, besides many diverting
attempts to enter a sedan-chair and a Pekin cart. In addition to this he
ordered a deep pit to be dug in the narrow passage leading to the
theatre, free drinks to be dispensed during the performance, and two of
his most lusty Yamen runners were stationed by the pit with whips to
assist the nervous in jumping it. This miserable person was then led
out, and again pegged down just beyond the pit, so that all who jumped
across must of necessity land on some portion of his miserable body.
“All was ready, the actors were waiting to appear, the audience stood on
the far side of the pit, and I, poor miserable man, remained pegged down
for all to jump on me. The runners had their whips ready to assist the
nervous jumpers when the tao-tai appeared. As principal actor everything
depended on him, but his hatred for me determined him to take one
violent jump on my chest across the pit to encourage the others. He was
by that time full of good wine, but he cautioned the lictors not to use
their whips in his case, as he felt confident of clearing the pit, and
landing on my chest without any stimulus. Waving back the common herd,
he made a generous run but misjudged the distance, and taking a
stupendous jump, he fell in the pit, where he lay unconscious.
“His attendants quickly dragged him out, and he was found to be
unconscious and also with a broken leg. Everyone at once showed the
deepest concern, and the tao-tai was carried in a chair to his Yamen.
The consternation at this catastrophe was so great that some of my
friends were able to release me, and so I left Chin Wen for ever.”
“I suppose you then became pylong?” said Master Jack.
Hong looked suggestively at the big hoop-iron sword in the gate-house,
and Jack, feeling that he was treading on holy ground, was silent.
“My tankee you velly much,” said Dorothy; “that no belong hollible
stoly, Hong.”
And Hong smiled inwardly.
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