As I had not been able to complete my view of the city on the

preceding day, I got up betimes in the morning with the intention of

taking another walk. In the street I remarked a Carthusian friar,

who doubtless was thus early in motion to promote the interests of

his order. He walked with his eyes fixed on the ground, and a gait

so holy and contemplative as to inspire every passenger with

religious awe. His path was in the same direction as mine. I looked

at him with more than ordinary curiosity, and could not help fancying

it was Don Raphael, that man of shifts and expedients, who has

already secured so honorable a niche in the temple of fame. (_See

Books I. to VI. of my Memoirs._)

I was so utterly astonished, so thrown off my balance by this

meeting, that, instead of accosting the monk, I remained motionless

for some seconds, which gave him time to get the start of me. Just

heaven! said I, were there ever two faces more exactly alike? I do

not know what to make of it! It seems incredible that Raphael should

turn up in such a guise! And yet how is it possible to be any one

else? I felt too great a curiosity to get at the truth not to pursue

the inquiry. Having ascertained the way to the monastery of the

Carthusians, I repaired thither immediately, in the hope of coming

across the object of my search on his return, and with the full

intent of stopping and parleying with him. But it was quite

unnecessary to wait for his arrival, to enlighten my mind on the

subject; on reaching the convent gate, another physiognomy, such as

few persons had read without paying for their lesson, resolved all my

doubts into certainty; for the friar who served in the capacity of

porter was unquestionably my old and godly-visaged servant, Ambrose

de Lamela.

Our surprise was equal on both sides at meeting again in such a

place. Is not this a play upon the senses? said I, paying my

compliments to him. Is it actually one of my friends who presents

himself to my astonished sight? He did not know me again at first,

or probably might pretend not to do so; but, reflecting within

himself that it was in vain to deny his own identity, he assumed the

start of a man who all at once hits upon a circumstance which had

hitherto escaped his recollection. Ah, Signor Gil Blas, exclaimed

he, excuse my not recognizing your person immediately. Since I have

lived in this holy place, every faculty of my soul has been absorbed

in the performance of the duties prescribed by our rules, so that by

degrees I lose the remembrance of all worldly objects and events.

After a separation of ten years, said I, it gives me much pleasure to

find you again in so venerable a garb. For my part, answered he, it

fills me with shame and confusion to appear in it before a man who

has been an eye-witness of my guilty courses. These ghostly weeds

are at once the charm of my present life, and the condemnation of my

former. Alas! added he, heaving a righteous sigh, to be worthy of

wearing it, my earlier years should have been passed in primitive

innocence. By this discourse, so rational and edifying, replied I,

it is plain, my dear brother, that the finger of the Lord has been

upon you, that you are marked out for a vessel of sanctification. I

tell you once again, I am delighted at it, and would give the world

to know in what miraculous manner you and Raphael were led into the

path of the righteous; for I am persuaded that it was his own self

whom I met in the town, habited as a Carthusian. I was extremely

sorry, afterwards, not to have stopped and spoken to him in the

street, and I am waiting here to apologize for my neglect on his

return.

You were not mistaken, said Lamela; it was Don Raphael himself whom

you saw; and as for the particulars of our conversion, they are as

follow: After parting with you near Segorba, we struck into the

Valencia road, with the design of bettering our trade by some new

speculation. Chance or destiny one day led our steps into the church

of the Carthusians, while service was performing in the choir. The

demeanor of the brethren attracted our notice, and we experienced in

our own persons the involuntary homage which vice pays to virtue. We

admired the fervor with which they poured forth their devotions,

their looks of pious mortification, their deadness to the pleasures

of the world and the flesh, and in the settled composure of their

countenances, the outward sign of an approving conscience within.

While making these observations, we fell into a train of thought

which became like manna to the hungry and thirsty soul: we compared

our habits of life with the employments of these holy men, and the

wide difference between our spiritual conditions filled us with

confusion and affright. Lamela, said Don Raphael, as we went out of

church, how do you stand affected by what we have just seen? For my

part, there is no disguising the truth; my mind is ill at ease.

Emotions new and indescribable are rushing upon my mind; and, for the

first time in my life, I reproach myself with the wickedness of my

past actions. I am just in the same temper of soul, answered I; my

iniquities are all drawn up in array against me; they beset me, they

stare me in the face; my heart, hitherto proof against all the arrows

of remorse, is at this moment shot through and through, torn and

disfigured, tormented and destroyed. Ah! my dear Ambrose, resumed my

partner, we are two stray sheep, whom our heavenly Father, in mercy,

would lead back gently to the fold. It is he himself, my child, it

is he who warns and guides us. Let us not be deaf to the call of his

voice; let us abandon all our wicked courses; let us begin from this

day to work out our salvation with diligence and in the spirit of

repentance: we had better spend the remainder of our days in this

convent, and consecrate them to penitence and devotion.

I applauded Raphael's sentiment, continued brother Ambrose, and we

formed the glorious resolution of becoming Carthusians. To carry it

into effect, we applied to the venerable prior, who was no sooner

made acquainted with our purpose, than, to ascertain whether our call

was from the world above or the world beneath, he appointed us to

cells, and all the strictness of monkish discipline, for a whole

year. We acted up to the rules with equal regularity and fortitude,

and, by way of reward, were admitted among the novices. Our

condition was so much what we wished it, and our hearts were so full

of religious zeal, that we underwent the toils of our novitiate with

unflinching courage. When that was over, we professed; after which,

Don Raphael, appearing admirably well qualified, both by natural

talent and various experience, for the management of secular

concerns, was chosen assistant to an old friar who was at that time

proctor. The son of Lucinda would infinitely have preferred

dedicating every remaining moment of his existence to prayer; but he

found it necessary to sacrifice his taste for devotion, in

furtherance of the general prosperity. He entered with so much zeal

and knowledge into the interests of the house, that he was considered

as the most eligible person to succeed the old proctor, who died

three years afterwards. Don Raphael accordingly fills that office at

present; and it may be truly said that he discharges his duty to the

entire satisfaction of all our fathers, who praise in the highest

terms his conduct in the administration of our temporalities. What

is most of all miraculous, and shows the hand of heaven in his

conversion, is that, with such an accumulation of business rushing in

upon him in his bursarial department, his regards are inalienably

fixed on the world to come. When business leaves him but a moment to

recruit nature, instead of lavishing the short period in indulgence,

his thoughts wing their way into the regions of devout and holy

meditation. In short, he is the most exemplary member of this body.

At this period of our conversation I interrupted Lamela by an

ebullition of joy to which I gave vent at the sight of Raphael coming

in. Here he is! exclaimed I; behold that righteous bursar for whom I

have been so impatiently waiting. With a leap and a bound did I run

to meet and embrace him. He submitted to the hug with his

newly-acquired resignation; and, without betraying the slightest

shock at meeting with an old companion of his profaner hours, his

words were dictated by the spirit of gentleness and humility: The

powers above be praised, Signor de Santillane, the powers be praised

for this kind providence whereby we meet again. In good truth, my

dear Raphael, replied I, your happy destiny pleases me as much as if

it had been my own good luck; brother Ambrose has told me the whole

story of your conversion, and the tale almost moved me to a similar

change. What a glorious lot for you two, my friends, when you have

reason to flatter yourselves with being among that picked number of

the elect, who have eternal happiness thrust upon them whether they

will or no!

Two miserable sinners like ourselves, resumed the son of Lucinda,

with an air which marked the extreme of sanctified morality, must not

hope that our own merits are of weight enough to save our souls; but

even the wicked one who repenteth findeth grace with the Father of

mercies. And you, Signor Gil Blas, added he, is it not time to lay

in a claim for pardon of the offences which you have committed? What

is your business here in Valencia? Are you not hankering after some

office of devil's deputy, and making shipwreck of your voyage to

another world? Not so, by the blessing of heaven, answered I; since

I turned my back on the court, I have led a very moral sort of life;

sometimes enjoying rural recreations on an estate of mine at a few

leagues' distance from this town, and sometimes coming hither to pass

my time with my friend the governor, whom you both of you must know

perfectly well.

On this cue I related to them the story of Don Alphonso de Leyva.

They heard the particulars with attention; and on my telling them

that I had carried to Samuel Simon, on the part of that nobleman, the

three thousand ducats of which we had robbed him, Lamela interrupted

the thread of my narrative, and addressing his discourse to Raphael,

said, Father Hilary, if this be true, the honest vender of wares has

no reason to quarrel with a robbery which has paid him fifty per

cent.; and our consciences, as far as that indictment goes, may bask

in the sunshine of acquitted innocence. Brother Ambrose and I, said

the bursar, did actually, on the assumption of the habit, send Samuel

Simon fifteen hundred ducats privately, by a pious ecclesiastic who

made a pilgrimage to Xelva for the sole purpose of accomplishing this

restitution; but it will go hard with Samuel at the general

reckoning, if he for filthy lucre could soil his fingers with that

sum, after having been reimbursed in full by Signor de Santillane.

But, said I, how do you know that your fifteen hundred ducats were

faithfully paid into his hands? Unquestionably they were! exclaimed

Don Raphael; I would answer for the disinterested purity of that

ecclesiastic as soon as for my own. I would be your collateral

security, said Lamela; he is a priest of the strictest sanctity, a

sort of universal almoner; and though many times cited for sums of

money deposited with him for charitable uses, he has always nonsuited

the plaintiffs, and gone out of court with an augmentation of

alms-giving notoriety.

Our conversation continued for some time longer: at length we parted,

with many a pious exhortation on their side, always to have the fear

of the Lord before my eyes, and with many an earnest entreaty on

mine, that they would remember me constantly in their prayers. Don

Alphonso was now the first object of my search. You will never

guess, said I, with whom I have just had a long conference. I am but

now come from two venerable Carthusians of your acquaintance; the

name of the one is Father Hilary, that of the other, brother Ambrose.

You are mistaken, answered Don Alphonso; I am not acquainted with a

single Carthusian. Pardon me, replied I; you have seen brother

Ambrose at Xelva in the capacity of commissary, and Father Hilary as

register to the inquisition. O heaven! exclaimed the governor with

surprise, can it be within the bounds of possibility that Raphael and

Lamela should have turned Carthusians? It is even so, answered I;

they professed several years ago. The former is bursar and proctor

to the convent, the latter, porter.

The son of Don Cæsar rubbed his forehead twice or thrice, then

shaking his head, These worshipful officers of the inquisition, said

he, most assuredly purpose playing over the old farce on a new stage

here. You judge of them by prejudice, answered I, from the

impression of their characters as men of sin: but had you been

edified by their lectures as I have been, you would think more

favorably of their holiness. To be sure, it is not for mortal men to

fathom the depth of other men's hearts; but to all appearance they

are two prodigals returned home. It possibly may be so, replied Don

Alphonso: there are many instances of libertines, who hide their

heads in cloisters, after having scandalized human nature by their

obliquities, to expatiate their offences by a severe penance: I

heartily wish that our two monks may be such libertines restored.

Well! and why not? said I. They have embraced the monastic life of

their own accord, and have squared their conduct for a length of time

according to the maxims of their order. You may say what you please,

retorted the governor; but I do not like the convent's rents being

received by this Father Hilary, of whom I cannot help entertaining a

very untoward opinion. When the fine story he told us of his

adventures comes across my mind, I tremble for the reverend

brotherhood. I am willing to believe with you, that he has taken the

vow with the pious intention of keeping it; but the blaze of gold may

be too much for the weakness of his regenerated eyesight, It is bad

policy to lock up a reformed drunkard in a wine cellar.

In the course of a few days Don Alphonso's misgivings were fully

justified; these two official props and stays of the establishment

ran away with the year's revenue. This news, which was immediately

noised about the town, could not do otherwise than set the tongues of

the wits in motion; for they always make themselves merry at the

crosses and losses of the well-endowed religious orders. As for the

governor and myself, we condoled with the Carthusians, but kept our

acquaintance with the apostate pilferers in the background.

_CHAPTER VII._

_GIL BLAS RETURNS TO HIS SEAT AT LIRIAS. SCIPIO'S AGREEABLE

INTELLIGENCE, AND A REFORM IN THE DOMESTIC ARRANGEMENTS._

I passed a week at Valencia in the first company, living on equal

terms with the best of the nobility. Plays, balls, concerts, grand

dinners, ladies' parties, all things that heart could wish or vanity

grow tall upon, were provided for me by the governor and his lady, to

whom I paid my court so dexterously, that they were heartily sorry to

see me set out on my return to Lirias. They even obliged me, before

they would let me go, to engage for a division of my time between

them and my hermitage. It was determined that I should spend the

winter in Valencia, and the summer at my seat. After this bargain,

my benefactors left me at liberty to tear myself from them, and go

where their kindness would be always staring me in the face.

Scipio, who was waiting impatiently for my return, was ready to jump

out of his skin for joy at the sight of me; and his ecstasies were

doubled at my circumstantial account of the journey. And now for

your history, my friend, said I, taking breath: to what moral uses

have you turned the solitary period of my absence? Has the time

passed agreeably? As well, answered he, as it could with a servant

to whom nothing is so dear as the presence of his master. I have

walked over our little domain, circuitously and diagonally: sometimes

seated on the margin of a fountain in our wood, I have taken pleasure

in beholding the transparency of its waters, which are as pellucid as

those of the sacred spring, whose projection from the rock made the

vast forest of Albunea to resound with the roar of the cascade:

sometimes, lying at the foot of a tree, I have listened to the song

of the linnet or the nightingale. At other times I have hunted or

fished; and, what has given me more rational delight than all these

pastimes, I have whiled away many a profitable hour in the

improvement of my mind.

I interrupted my secretary in a tone of eager inquiry, to ask where

he had procured books. I found them, said he, in an elegant library

here in the house, whither Master Joachim took me. Heyday! in what

corner, resumed I, can this said library be? Did we not go over the

whole building on the day of our arrival? You fancied so, rejoined

he; but you are to know that we only explored three sides of the

square, and forgot the fourth. It was there that Don Cæsar, when he

came to Lirias, employed part of his time in reading. There are in

this library some very good books, left as a never-failing phylactery

against the blue devils, when our gardens despoiled of Flora's

treasure, and our woods of their leafy honors, shall no longer

challenge those miscreant invaders to combat in the forest or the

bower. The lords of Leyva have not done things by halves, but have

catered for the mind as well as for the body.

This intelligence filled me with sincere rapture. I was shown to the

fourth side of the square, and feasted with an intellectual banquet.

Don Cæsar's room I immediately determined to make my own. That

nobleman's bed was still there, with correspondent furniture,

consisting of historical tapestry, representing the rape of the

Sabine women by the Romans. From the bedchamber, I went into a

closet fitted up with low bookcases well filled, and over them the

portraits of the Spanish kings. Near a window whence you command a

prospect of a most bewitching country, there was an ebony

writing-desk and a large sofa, covered with black morocco. But I

gave my attention principally to the library. It was composed of

philosophers, poets, historians, and abounded in romances. Don Cæsar

seemed to give the preference to that light reading, if one might

judge by the profusion of supply. I must own, to my shame, that my

taste was not at all above the level of those productions,

notwithstanding the extravagances they delight in stringing together;

whether it was owing to my not being a very critical reader at that

time, or because the Spaniards are naturally addicted to the

marvellous. I must nevertheless plead, in my own justification, that

I was alive to the charms of a sprightly and popular morality, and

that Lucian, Horace, and Erasmus became my favorite and standard

authors.

My friend, said I to Scipio, when my eyes had coursed over my

library, here is wherewithal to feed and pamper our minds; but our

present business is to reform our household. On that subject I can

spare you a great deal of trouble, answered he. During your absence

I have sifted your people thoroughly, and flatter myself it is no

empty boast to say that I know them. Let us begin with Master

Joachim: I take him to be as great a scoundrel as ever breathed, and

have no doubt but he was turned away from the archbishop's for errors

which were too great to be excepted in the passing of his accounts.

Yet we must keep him for two reasons: the first, because he is a good

cook; and the second, because I shall always have an eye over him; I

shall peep into his actions like a jackdaw into a marrow-bone, and he

must be a more cunning fellow than I take him for, to evade my

vigilance. I have already told him that you intended discharging

three fourths of your establishment. This declaration stuck in his

stomach; and he assured me that, owing to his extreme desire of

living with you, he would be satisfied with half his present wages

rather than be turned off, which made me suspect that he was tied to

the string of some petticoat in the hamlet, and did not like to break

up his quarters. As for the under-cook, he is a drunkard, and the

porter a foul-mouthed Cerberus, of whose guardianship our gates are

in no want; neither is the game-keeper a necessary evil. I shall

take the latter office myself, as you may see to-morrow, when we have

got our fowling-pieces in order, and are provided with powder and

shot. With regard to the footmen, one of them is an Arragonese, and

to my mind a very good sort of fellow. We will keep him; but all the

rest are such rapscallions, that I would not advise you to harbor one

of them, if you wanted an army of attendants.

After having fully debated the point, we resolved to keep well with

the cook, the scullion, the Arragonese, and to get rid of the

remainder as decently as we could; all which was planned and executed

on the same day, mollifying the bitter dose by the application of a

few pistoles, which Scipio took from our strong box, and distributed

among them as from me. When we had carried this reform into effect,

order was soon established in our mansion; we divided the business

fairly among our remaining people, and began to look into our

expenses. I could willingly have been contented with very frugal

commons; but my secretary, loving high dishes and relishing bits, was

not a man who would suffer Master Joachim to hold his place as a

sinecure. He kept his talents in such constant play, working double

tides at dinner and at supper, that any one would have thought we had

been converted by father Hilary, and were working out the term of our

probation.

_CHAPTER VIII._

_THE LOVES OF GIL BLAS AND THE FAIR ANTONIA._

Two days after my return from Valencia to Lirias, clodpole Basil, my

farming man, came at my dressing-time to beg the favor of introducing

his daughter Antonia, who was very desirous, as he said, to have the

honor of paying her respects to her new master. I answered that it

was very proper, and would be well received. He withdrew, and in a

few minutes returned with his peerless Antonia. That epithet, though

bold, will not be thought extravagant in the case of a girl from

sixteen to eighteen years of age, uniting to regular features the

finest complexion and the brightest eyes in the world. She was

dressed in nothing better than a stuff gown; but a stature somewhat

above the female standard, a dignified deportment, and such graces as

soared higher than the mere freshness and glow of youth, communicated

to her rustic attire the simplicity of classical costume. She had no

cap on her head; her hair was fastened behind with a knot of flowers,

according to the chaste severity of the Spartan fashionables.

When she illumined my chamber with her presence, I was struck as much

on a heap by her beauty as ever were the princes, knights, nobles,

and strangers, assembled at the solemn feast and tournament of

Charlemain, by the personal charms of Angelica. Instead of receiving

Antonia with modish indifference, and paying her compliments of

course, instead of ringing the changes on her father's happiness in

possessing so lovely a daughter, I stood stock still, staring,

gaping, stammering: I could not have uttered an articulate sound for

the universal world. Scipio, who saw clearly what was the matter

with me, took the words out of my mouth, and accepted those bills of

admiration which my affairs were in too much disorder to admit of my

duly honoring. For her part, my figure being shrouded by a

dressing-gown and nightcap, like the orb of day by a winter fog, she

accosted me without being shamefaced, and paid her duty in terms

which fired all the combustibles in my composition, though her words

were but the holiday expressions of commonplace salutation. In the

mean time, while my secretary, Basil, and his daughter, were engaged

in reciprocal exchange of civility, I found my senses again; and

passed from one extreme of absurdity to another, just as if I had

thought that a hare-brained loquacity would be a set-off against the

idiotic silence of my first encounter. I exhausted all my stock of

well-bred rodomontade, and expressed myself with so unguarded a

freedom as to make Basil look about him; so that he, with his eye

upon me as a man who would set every engine at work to seduce

Antonia, was in a hurry to get her safely out of my apartment, with a

resolved purpose, probably, of withdrawing her forever from my

pursuit.

Scipio, finding himself alone with me, said with a smile, Here is

another defence for you against the blue devils! I did not know that

your farming man had so pretty a daughter; for I had never seen her

before, though I have been twice at his house. He must have taken

infinite pains to keep her out of the way, and it is impossible to be

angry with him for it. What the plague! here is a morsel for a

lickerish palate! But there seems to be no necessity for blazoning

her perfections to you; their very first glance dazzled you out of

countenance. I do not deny it, answered I. Ah, my beloved friend; I

have surely seen an inhabitant of the realms above; the electrical

spark now thrills through all my frame, it scorches like lightning,

yet tingles like the vivifying fluid at my heart.

You delight me beyond measure, replied my secretary, by giving me to

understand that you have at length fallen in love. Nothing but a

mistress was wanting to complete your rural establishment at all

points. Thanks to heaven, you are now likely to be accommodated in

every way. I am well aware that we shall have a hard matter to elude

Basil's vigilance; but leave that to me, and I will undertake before

the end of three days to manage a private meeting for you with

Antonia. Master Scipio, said I, it is not so sure that you would be

able to keep your word; but, at all events, I have not the least

desire to make the experiment. I will have nothing to do with the

ruin of that girl; for she is an angel, and does not deserve to be

numbered among the fallen ones. Therefore, instead of laying the

guilt upon your soul of assisting me in her dishonor, I have made up

my mind to marry her with your kind help, supposing her heart not to

be pre-occupied by a prior attachment. I had no idea, said he, of

your directly plunging headlong into the cold bath of matrimony. The

generality of landlords, in your place, would stand upon the ancient

tenure of manorial rights: they would not deal with Antonia upon the

square of modern law and gospel, till after failure in the

establishment of their feudal privileges. But though this may be the

way of the world, do not suppose that I am by any means against your

honorable passion, or at all wish to dissuade you from your purpose.

Your bailiff's daughter deserves the distinction you design for her,

if she can give you the first fruits of her heart, an offering of

sensibility and gratitude; that is what I shall ascertain this very

day by talking with her father, and possibly with her.

My agent was a man to transact his business according to the letter.

He went to see Basil privately, and in the evening came to me in my

closet, where I waited for him with impatience, somewhat exasperated

by apprehension. There was a slyness in his countenance, whence my

prognostic inclined to the brighter side. Judging, said I, by that

look of suppressed merriment, you are come to acquaint me that I

shall soon be at the summit of human bliss. Yes, my dear master,

answered he, the heavens smile upon your vows. I have talked the

matter over with Basil and his daughter, declaring your intentions

without reserve. The father is delighted at the idea of your asking

his blessing as a son-in-law; and you may set your heart at rest

about Antonia's taste in a husband. Darts and flames! cried I, in an

ecstasy of amorous transport; what! am I so happy as to have made

myself agreeable to that lovely creature? Never question it, replied

he; she loves you already. It is true, she has not owned so much by

word of mouth; but my assurance rests on the tale-telling sparkle of

her eye, when your proposals were made known to her. And yet you

have a rival! A rival! exclaimed I, with a faltering voice and a

cheek blanched with fear. Do not let that give you the least

uneasiness, said he; your competitor cannot bid very high, for he is

no other than Master Joachim, your cook. Ah! the hangdog! said I,

with an involuntary shout of laughter: this is the reason, then, why

he had so great an objection to being turned out of my service.

Exactly so, answered Scipio; within these few days he made proposals

of marriage to Antonia, who politely declined them. With submission

to your better judgment, replied I, it would be expedient--at least,

so it strikes me--to get rid of that strange fellow before he is

informed of my intended match with Basil's daughter: a cook, as you

are aware, is a dangerous rival. You are perfectly in the right,

rejoined my trusty counsellor; we must clear the premises of him--he

shall receive his discharge from me to-morrow morning, before he puts

a finger in the fricandeaus; thus you will have nothing more to fear

either from his poisonous sauces or bewitching tongue. Yet it goes

rather against the grain with me to part with so good a cook; but I

sacrifice the interests of my own belly to the preservation of your

precious person. You need not, said I, take on so for his loss; he

had no exclusive patent; and I will send to Valencia for a cook, who

shall outcook all his fine cookery. According to my promise, I wrote

immediately to Don Alphonso, to let him know that our kitchen wanted

a prime minister; and on the following day he filled up the vacancy

in so worthy a manner as reconciled Scipio at once to the change in

culinary politics.

Though my adroit and active secretary had assured me of Antonia's

secret self-congratulation on the conquest of her landlord's heart, I

could not venture to rely solely on his report. I was fearful lest

he should have been entrapped by false appearances. To be more

certain of my bliss, I determined on speaking in person to the fair

Antonia. I therefore went to Basil's house, and confirmed to him

what my ambassador had announced. This honest peasant, of

patriarchal simplicity and golden-aged frankness, after having heard

me through, did not hesitate to own that it would be the greatest

happiness of his life to give me his daughter; but, added he, you are

by no means to suppose that it is because you are lord of the manor.

Were you still steward to Don Cæsar and Don Alphonso, I should prefer

you to all other suitors who might apply: I have always felt a sort

of kindness towards you; and nothing vexes me but that Antonia has

not a thumping fortune to bring with her. I want not the vile dross,

said I; her person is the only dowry that I covet. Your humble

servant for that, cried he; but you will not settle accounts with me

after that fashion; I am not a beggar, to marry my daughter upon

charity. Basil de Buenotrigo is in circumstances, by the blessing of

Providence, to portion her off decently; and I mean that she should

set out a little supper, if you are to be at the expense of dinners.

In a word, the rental of this estate is only five hundred ducats: I

shall raise it to a thousand on the strength of this marriage.

Just as you please, my dear Basil, replied I; we are not likely to

have any dispute about money matters. We are both of a mind; all

that remains is to get your daughter's consent. You have mine, said

he, and that is enough. Not altogether so, answered I; though yours

may be absolutely necessary, no business can be done without hers.

Hers follows mine of course, replied he; I should like to catch her

murmuring against my sovereign commands! Antonia, rejoined I, with

dutiful submission to paternal authority, is ready, without question,

to obey your will implicitly in all things; but I know not whether in

the present instance she would do so without violence to her own

feelings; and, should that be the case, I could never forgive myself

for being the occasion of unhappiness to her; in short, it is not

enough that I obtain her hand from you, if her heart is to heave a

sigh at the decision of her destiny. O, blessed virgin! said Basil;

all these fine doctrines of philosophy are far above my reach; speak

to Antonia your own self, and you will find, or I am very much

mistaken, that she wishes for nothing better than to be your wife.

These words were no sooner out of his mouth, than he called his

daughter, and left me with her for a few short minutes.

Not to trifle with so precious an opportunity, I broke my mind to her

at once. Lovely Antonia, said I, it remains with you to fix the

color of my future days. Though I have your father's consent, do not

think so meanly of me as to suppose that I would avail myself of it

to violate the sacred freedom of your choice. Rapturous as must be

the possession of your charms, I waive my pretensions if you but tell

me that your duty, and not your will, complies. It would be

affectation to put on such a repugnance, answered she; the honor of

your addresses is too flattering to excite any other than agreeable

sensations, and I am thankful for my father's tender care of me,

instead of demurring to his will. I am not sure whether such an

acknowledgment may not be contrary to the rules of female reserve in

the polite world; but if you were disagreeable to me, I should be

plain-spoken enough to tell you so; why, then, should I not be

equally free in owning the kind feelings of my heart?

At sounds like these, which I could not hear without being

enraptured, I dropped on my knee before Antonia, and in the excess of

my tender emotions, taking one of her fair hands, kissed it with an

affectionate and impassioned action. My dear Antonia, said I, your

frankness enchants me: go on; let nothing induce you to depart from

it; you are conversing with your future husband; let your soul expand

itself, and reveal all its inmost emotions in his presence. Thus,

then, may I entertain the flattering hope that you will not frown on

the union of our destinies! The coming in of Basil at this moment

prevented me from giving further vent to the delightful sensations

which thrilled through me. Impatient to know how his daughter had

behaved, and ready primed for scolding in case she had been perverse

or coy, he made up to me immediately. Well, now, said he, are you

satisfied with Antonia? So much so, answered I, that I am going this

very moment to set forward the preparations for our marriage. So

saying, I left the father and daughter, for the purpose of taking

counsel with my secretary thereupon.

_CHAPTER IX._

_NUPTIALS OF GIL BLAS WITH THE FAIR ANTONIA; THE STYLE AND MANNER OF

THE CEREMONY; THE PERSONS ASSISTING THEREAT; AND THE FESTIVITIES

ENSUING THEREUPON._

Though there was no occasion to consult with the lords of Leyva about

my marriage, yet both Scipio and myself were of opinion that I could

not decently do otherwise than communicate to them my purpose of

connecting myself with Basil's daughter, and just pay them the

compliment of asking their advice, after the act was finally

determined on.

I immediately went off for Valencia, where my visit was a matter of

surprise, and still more the purport of it. Don Cæsar and Don

Alphonso, who were acquainted with Antonia, having seen her more than

once, wished me joy on my good fortune in a wife. Don Cæsar, in

particular, made his speech upon the occasion with so much youthful

fire, that if there had not been reason to suppose his lordship

weaned, by that icy moralist, time, from certain naughty

propensities, I should have suspected him of going to Lirias now and

then, not so much to look after his concerns there, as after his

little empress of the dairy. Seraphina, too, with the kindest

assurances of a lively interest in whatever might befall me, said

that she had heard a very favorable character of Antonia; but, added

she, with a malicious fling, as if to taunt me with my supercilious

reception of Sephora's amorous advances, even though her beauty had

not been so much the talk of the country, I could have depended on

your taste, from former experience of its delicacy and fastidiousness.

Don Cæsar and his son did not stop at cold approbation of my

marriage, but declared that they would defray all the expenses of it.

Measure back your steps, said they, to Lirias, and stay quietly there

till you hear further from us. Make no preparation for your

nuptials, for we shall make that our concern. To meet their kind

intentions with becoming gratitude, I returned to my mansion, and

acquainted Basil and his daughter with the projected kindness of our

patrons. We determined to wait their pleasure with as much patience

as falls to the lot of poor human nature under such circumstances.

Eight long days dragged out their tedious measure, and brought no

tidings of our bliss. But the rewards of self-control are not the

less assured for being slow: on the ninth, a coach drawn by four

mules drove up, with a cargo of mantua-makers for the bride, and an

assortment of rich silks on which to exercise their art. Several

livery servants, mounted on mules, accompanied the cavalcade. One of

them brought me a letter from Don Alphonso. That nobleman sent me

word that he would be at Lirias next day with his father and his

wife, and that the marriage ceremony should be performed on the day

after that, by the vicar-general of Valencia. And just so it came to

pass: Don Cæsar, his son, and Seraphina, with that venerable

dignitary, were punctual to their appointment, all four of them in a

coach and six,--none of your mules, like the mantua-makers,--preceded

by another coach and four, with Seraphina's women; and the rear was

brought up by a company of the governor's guards.

The governor's lady had hardly entered the house before she testified

an ardent longing to see Antonia, who, on her part, no sooner knew

that Seraphina was arrived, than she ran forward to bid her welcome,

with a respectful kiss upon her hand, so gracefully and modestly

impressed, that all the company were enchanted at the action. And

now, madam, said Don Cæsar to his daughter-in-law, what do you think

of Antonia? Could Santillane have made a better choice? No,

answered Seraphina; they are worthy each of the other; there can be

no doubt but their union will be most happy. In short, every one was

lavish in the praise of my intended; and if they felt her beams so

powerfully under the eclipse of a stuff gown, what must they not have

endured from her brightness in the meridian sunshine of her wedding

finery! One would have fancied she had been clothed in silks,

jewels, and fine linen from her cradle, by the dignity of her air and

the ease of her deportment.

The happy moment which was to unite two fond lovers in the bands of

Hymen being arrived, Don Alphonso took me by the hand and led me to

the altar, while Seraphina conferred the like honor on the bride

elect. Our procession had marched in fit and decent order through

the hamlet to the chapel, where the vicar-general was waiting to go

through the service; and the ceremony was performed amidst the

heartfelt congratulations of the inhabitants, and of all the wealthy

farmers in the neighborhood, whom Basil had invited to Antonia's

wedding. Their daughters, too, came in their train, tricked out in

ribbons and in flowers, and dancing to the music of their own

tambourines. We returned to the mansion under the same escort; and

there, by the provident attentions of Scipio, who officiated as high

steward and master of the ceremonies, we found three tables set out;

one for the principals of the party, another for their household, and

the third, which was by far the largest, for all invited guests

promiscuously. Antonia was at the first, the governor's lady having

made a point of it; I did the honors of the second; and Basil was

placed at the head of that where the country people dined. As for

Scipio, he never sat down, but was here, there, and everywhere,

fetching and carrying, changing plates and filling bumpers, urging

the company to call freely for what they wanted, and egging them on

to mirth and jollity.

The entertainment had been prepared by the governor's cooks; and that

is as much as to say that there were all the delicacies imaginable,

in season or out of season. The good wines laid in for me by Master

Joachim were set running at a furious rate; the guests were beginning

to feel their jovial influence, pleasantry and repartee gave a zest

to conviviality, when on a sudden our harmony was interrupted by an

alarming occurrence. My secretary, being in the hall where I was

dining with Don Alphonso's principal officers and Seraphina's women,

suddenly fainted. I started up and ran to his assistance; and, while

I was employed in bringing him about, one of the women was taken ill

also. It was evident to the whole company that this sympathetic

malady must involve some mysterious incident, as in effect it turned

out, almost immediately, that thereby hung a tale; for Scipio soon

recovered, and said to me in a low voice, Why must one man's meat be

another man's poison, and the most auspicious of your days the curse

of mine? But every man bears the bundle of his sins upon his back,

and my pack-saddle is once more thrown across my shoulders in the

person of my wife.

Powers of mercy! exclaimed I, this can never be! It is all a

romance. What! you the husband of that lady whose nerves were so

affected by the disturbance? Yes, sir, answered he, I am her

husband; and fortune, if you will take the word of a sinner, could

not have done me a dirtier office than by conjuring up such a

grievance as this. I know not, my friend, replied I, what reasons

you may have for thus belaboring your rib with wordy buffets; but

however she maybe to blame, in mercy keep a bridle on your tongue; if

you have any regard for me, do not displace the mirth and spoil the

pleasure of this nuptial meeting by ominous disorder or enraged

questions of past injuries. You shall have no reason to complain on

that score, rejoined Scipio, but shall see presently whether I am not

a very apt dissembler.

With this assurance he went forward to his wife, whom her companions

had also brought back to life and recollection, and, embracing her

with as much apparent fervor as if his raptures had been real, Ah, my

dear Beatrice, said he, heaven has at length united us again after

ten years of cruel separation! But this blissful moment is well

purchased by whole ages of torturing suspense! I know not, answered

his spouse, whether you really are at all the happier for having

recovered a part of yourself: but of this at least I am fully

certain, that you never had any reason to run away from me as you

did. A fine story indeed! You found me one night with Signor Don

Ferdinand de Leyva, who was in love with my mistress Julia, and

consulted me on the subject of his passion; and only for that, you

must take it into your stupid head that I was caballing with him

against your honor and my own: thereupon that poor brain of yours was

turned with jealousy; you quitted Toledo in a huff, and ran away from

your own flesh and blood as you would from a monster of the deserts,

without leaving word why or wherefore. Now, which of us two, be so

good as to tell me, has most reason to take on and be pettish? Your

own dear self, beyond all question, replied Scipio. Beyond all

question, reëchoed she, my own ill-used self. Don Ferdinand, very

shortly after you had taken yourself off from Toledo, married Julia,

with whom I continued as long as she lived; and, after we had lost

her by sudden death, I came into my lady her sister's service, who,

as well as all her maids,--and I would do as much for them,--will

give me a good character; honest and sober, and a very termagant

among the impertinent fellows.

My secretary, having nothing to allege against such a character from

my lady and her maids, was determined to make the best of a bad

bargain. Once for all, said he to his spouse, I acknowledge my bad

behavior, and beg pardon for it before this honorable assembly. It

was now time for me to act the mediator, and to move Beatrice for an

act of amnesty, assuring her that her husband from this time forward

would make it the great object of his life to play the husband to her

satisfaction. She began to see that there was reason in roasting of

eggs, and all present were loud in their congratulations on the

triumph of suffering virtue, and the renovated pledge of broken vows.

To bind the contract firmer, and make it memorable, they were seated

next to one another at table; their healths were drank according to

the laws of toasting: Wish you joy! Many returns of this happy day!

rang round on every side: one would have sworn that the dinner was

given for their reconciliation, and not on account of my marriage.

The third table was the first to be cleared. The young villagers

jumped up in a body; the lads took out their blooming partners; the

tambourines struck up a merry beat; spectators flocked from the other

tables, and caught the enlivening spirit from the gay bustle of the

scene. Every limb and muscle of every individual was in motion: the

household of the governor and his lady formed a set, apart from the

rustics of the company, while their superiors did not disdain to

mingle with the homelier dancers. Don Alphonso danced a saraband

with Seraphina, and Don Cæsar another with Antonia, who afterwards

took me for her partner. She did not perform much amiss, considering

that she never got much further than the five positions, in learning

which she had her ankles kicked to pieces by a provincial

dancing-master at Albarazin, while on a visit to a tradesman's wife,

one of her relations. As for me, who, as I have already said, had

taken lessons at the Marchioness de Chaves's, I figured away as the

principal man in this rural ballet. With regard to Beatrice and

Scipio, they preferred a little private conversation to dancing, that

they might compare notes on the subject of wear and tear during the

painful period of separation: but their billing and cooing was

interrupted by Seraphina, who, having been informed of this dramatic

discovery, sent for them to pay the customary compliments of

congratulation. My good people, said she, on this day of general

joy, it gives me additional pleasure to see you two restored to one

another. My friend Scipio, I return you your wife under a firm

belief that she has always conducted herself as became a woman; take

up your abode with her here, and be a good husband to her. And you,

Beatrice, attach yourself to Antonia, and let her be as much the

object of your devoted service, as Signor de Santillane is that of

your husband. Scipio, who could not possibly, after this, think of

Penelope as fit to hold a candle to his own wife, promised to treat

her with all the deference due to such a paragon of conjugal fidelity.

The country people, having kept up the dance till late, withdrew to

their own homes; but the rejoicings were prolonged by the company in

the house. There was a grand supper, and at bed-time the

vicar-general pronounced the blessing of consummation. Seraphina

undressed the bride, and the lords of Leyva did me the same honor.

The ridiculous part of the business was, that Don Alphonso's officers

and his lady's attendants took it into their heads, by way of

diverting themselves, to perform the same ceremony: they also

undressed Beatrice and Scipio, who, to render the scene supremely

farcical, gravely allowed themselves to be untrussed, and put to bed

with all nuptial pomp and state.

_CHAPTER X._

_THE HONEY-MOON (A VERY DULL TIME FOR THE READER AS A THIRD PERSON)

ENLIVENED BY THE COMMENCEMENT OF SCIPIO'S STORY._

"'Tis heaven itself, 'tis ecstasy of bliss,

Uninterrupted joy, untired excess;

Mirth following mirth, the moments dance away;

Love claims the night, and friendship rules the day."

On the day after the wedding, the lords of Leyva returned to

Valencia, after having lavished on me a thousand marks of friendship.

There was such a general clearance, that my secretary and myself,

with our respective wives, and our usual establishment, were left in

undisturbed possession of our own home.

The efforts which we both made to please our ladies were not thrown

away: I breathed by degrees into the partner of my joys and sorrows

as much love for me as I entertained for her; and Scipio made his

better part forget the woes and privations he had occasioned her.

Beatrice, who had very winning ways with her, and was all things to

all women, had no difficulty about worming herself into the good

graces of her new mistress, and gaining her complete confidence. In

short, we all four agreed admirably well together, and began to enjoy

a bliss above the common lot of humanity. Every day rolled along

more delightfully than the last. Antonia was pensive and demure; but

Beatrice and myself were enlisted in the crew of mirth; and even

though we had been constitutionally sedate, Scipio was among us, and

he was of himself a pill to purge melancholy. The best creature in

the world for a snug little party! one of those merry drolls who have

only to show their comical faces, and set the table in a roar of

inextinguishable laughter.

One day, when we had taken a fancy to go after dinner, and doze away

the usual interval in the most sequestered spot about the grounds, my

secretary got into such exuberant spirits as to chase away the drowsy

god by his exhilarating sallies. Do hold your tongue, my loquacious

friend, said I; or else, if you are determined to wage war against

this lazy custom of our afternoons, at least tell us something which

we shall be the wiser for hearing. With all my heart and soul, sir,

answered he. Would you have me go through all fabulous histories of

wandering knights, distressed damsels, giants, enchanted castles, and

the whole train of legendary adventures? I had much rather hear your

own true history, replied I; but that is a pleasure which you have

not thought fit to give me so long as we have lived together, and I

seem likely to go without it to the end of the chapter. How happens

that? said he. If I have not told you my own story, it is because

you never expressed the slightest wish to be troubled with the

recital: therefore it is not my fault if you are in the dark about my

past life; but if you are really at all curious to be let into the

secret, my loquacity is very much at your service on the occasion.

Antonia, Beatrice, and myself unanimously took him at his word, and

arranged ourselves for listening like an attentive audience. The

speculation was a safe one on our parts; for the tale was sure to

answer, either as a stimulant or a soporific.

I certainly ought to have been descended, said Scipio, from some

family of the highest rank and earliest antiquity; or, in default of

such parentage, from the most distinguished orders of personal merit,

such as that of St. James of Alcantara, if a man may be permitted to

decide on the fittest circumstances for his own birth: but as it is

not among the privileges of human nature to elect one's own father,

you are to know that mine, by name Torribio Scipio, was a subaltern

myrmidon of the Holy Brotherhood. As he was going back and fore on

the king's highway, and looking after business in his own line, he

met, once on a time, between Cuenja and Toledo, with a young Bohemian

babe of chance, who appeared very pretty in his eyes. She was alone,

on foot, and carried her whole patrimony at her back in a kind of

knapsack. Whither are you going, my little darling? said he in a

philandering tone of voice, unlike the natural hoarseness of his

accents. Good worthy gentleman, answered she, I am going to Toledo,

where I hope to gain an honest livelihood by hook or by crook. Your

intentions are highly commendable, retorted he; and I doubt not but

you have many a hook and many a crook among the implements of your

trade. Yes, with a blessing on my endeavors, rejoined she: I have

several little ways of doing for myself: I know how to make washes

and creams for the ladies' faces, perfumes for their noses and their

chambers; then I can tell fortunes, can search for things lost with a

sieve and shears, and erect figures for the taking in of shadows with

a glass.

Torribio, concluding that so well provided a girl would be a very

advantageous match for a man like himself, who could scarcely scrape

wherewithal to support life by his own profession, though he was as

good a thief-taker as the best of them, made her an offer of

marriage, and she was nothing loath, nor prudishly coy. They flew on

the wings of inclination and convenience to Toledo, where they were

joined together; and you behold in me the happy pledge of holy and

lawful matrimony. They fixed themselves in a shop on the outskirts

of the town; where my mother commenced her career by selling the said

washes, creams, tapes, laces, silk, thread, toys, and pedler's ware;

but trade not being brisk enough to live comfortably by it, she

turned fortune-teller. This drew her customers, got her countenance,

credit, crowns, and pistoles: a thousand dupes of either sex soon

trumpeted up the reputation of Cosclina; for so my gypsy mamma had

the honor to be named. Some one or other came every day to bargain

for the exercise of her skill in the black art; at one time a nephew

at his wit's and purse's end, wanting to know how soon his uncle was

to set off post for the other world, and leave behind him wherewithal

to piece his worn-out fortunes; at another, some yielding, lovesick

girl, to inquire whether the swain who kept her company, and had

promised to marry her, would keep his word or be false-hearted.

You will take notice, if you please, that my mother always sold good

luck for good money: if the accomplishment trod on the heels of the

prediction, well and good; if it was fulfilled according to the rule

of contraries, she was always cool, though the parties were ever so

violently in a passion, and told them plainly that it was her

familiar's fault, not hers; for though she paid him the highest

wages, and bound him by potent spells to stir up the caldron of

futurity from the bottom, like earthly cooks, he would sometimes be

careless or out of humor, and apportion the ingredients wrongly.

When my mother thought the conjuncture momentous enough to raise the

devil without cheapening him in the eyes of the vulgar, Torribio

Scipio enacted his infernal majesty, and played the part just as if

he had been born to it, humoring the hideous features of the

character by a very small aggravation of his own natural face, and

practising the pandemonian note of elocution in the lower octave of

his voice. A person in the slightest degree superstitious would be

scared out of his senses at my father's figure. But one day, as his

satanic prototype would have it, there came a savage rascal of a

captain, who asked to see the devil, for no earthly purpose but to

run him clean through the body. The inquisition, having received

notice of the devil's death, sent to take charge of his widow, and

administer to his effects: as for poor little me, just seven years

old at the time, I was sent to the foundling hospital. There were

some charitable ecclesiastics on that establishment, who, being

liberally paid for the education of the poor orphans, were so zealous

in their office as to teach them reading and writing. They fancied

there was something particularly promising about me, which made them

pick me out from all the rest, and send me on their errands. I was

letter-carrier, messenger, and chapel-clerk. As a token of their

gratitude, they undertook to teach me Latin; but their mode of

tuition was so harsh, and their discipline so severe, though I was a

sort of pet with them, that, not being able to stand it longer, I ran

away one morning while out on an errand, and, so far from returning

to the hospital, got out of Toledo through the suburbs on the Seville

side.

Though I had not then completed my ninth year, I already felt the

pleasure of being free, and master of my own actions. I was without

money and without food: no matter! I had no lessons to say by heart,

no themes to hammer out. After having pushed on for two hours, my

little legs began to refuse their office. I had never before made so

long a trip. It became necessary to stop and take some rest. I sat

myself down at the foot of a tree close by the highway; there, by way

of amusement, I took my grammar out of my pocket, and began conning

it over by way of a joke: but at length, coming to recollect the raps

on the knuckles, and the castigations on the more classical seat of

punishment which it had cost me, I tore it leaf by leaf with an

apostrophe of angry import. Ah! you odious thing of a book! you

shall never make me shed tears any more. While I was assuaging my

vindictive spirit by strewing the ground about me with declensions

and conjugations, there passed that way a hermit with a white beard,

with a large pair of spectacles on his nose, and altogether an

outside of much sanctity. He came up to me; and, if I was an object

of speculation to him, he was no less so to me. My little man, said

he with a smile, it should seem as if we had both taken a sudden

liking to each other; and in that case we cannot do better than to

live together in my hermitage, which is not two hundred yards

distant. Your most obedient for that, answered I, pertly enough; I

have not the least desire to turn hermit. At this answer, the good

old man set up a roar of laughter, and said with a kind embrace, You

must not be frightened at my dress; if it is not becoming, it is

useful; it gives me my title to a charming retreat, and to the

good-will of the neighboring villages, whose inhabitants love, or

rather idolize me. Come this way, and I will clothe you in a jacket

of the same stuff as mine. If you think well of it, you shall share

with me the pleasures of the life I lead; and, if it does not hit

your fancy, you shall not only be at liberty to leave me, but you may

depend on it that in the event of our parting, I shall not fail to do

something handsome by you.

I suffered myself to be persuaded, and followed the old hermit, who

put several questions to me, which I answered with a truth-telling

simplicity not always to be found in a more advanced stage of

morality. On our arrival at the hermitage, he set some fruit before

me, which I devoured, having eaten nothing all day but a slice of dry

bread, on which I had breakfasted at the hospital in the morning.

The recluse, seeing me play so good a part with my jaws, said,

Courage, my good boy! do not spare my fruit; there is plenty of it,

heaven be praised. I have not brought you hither to starve you. And

indeed that was true enough; for an hour after our coming in, he

kindled a fire, put a leg of mutton down to roast, and, while I

turned the spit, laid a small table for himself and me, with a very

dirty napkin upon it.

When the meat was done enough, he took it up, and cut some slices for

our supper, which was no dry bargain, since we quaffed a delicious

wine, of which he had laid in ample store. Well, my chicken, said

he, as he rose from table, are you satisfied with my style of living?

You see how we shall fare every day, if you fix your quarters here.

Then, with respect to liberty, you shall do just as you please in

this hermitage. All I require of you is to accompany me, whenever I

go begging to the neighboring villages; you will be of use in driving

an ass laden with two panniers, which the charitable peasants usually

fill with eggs, bread, meat, and fish. I ask no more than that. I

will do, said I, whatever you desire, provided you will not oblige me

to learn Latin. Friar Chrysostom--for that was the old hermit's

name--could not help smiling at my schoolboy frowardness, and assured

me once more that he should not pretend to interfere either with my

studies or my inclinations.

On the very next day we went on a foraging party with the donkey,

which I led by the halter. We made a profitable gleaning; for all

the farmers took a pleasure in throwing somewhat into our panniers.

One chucked in an uncut loaf, another a large piece of bacon; here a

goose, there a pair of giblets, and a partridge to crown the whole.

But without entering further into particulars, we carried home

provender enough for a week; and hence you may infer the esteem and

friendship in which the country people held the holy man. It is true

that he was a great blessing to the neighborhood: his advice was

always at their service when they came to consult him: he restored

peace where discord had reigned in families, and made up matches for

the daughters; he had a nostrum for almost any disease you could

mention, with an assortment of pious rituals to avert the curse of

barrenness.

Hence you perceive that I was in no danger of starving in my

hermitage. My lodging, too, was none of the worst; stretched on good

fresh straw, with a cushion of ratteen under my head, and a coverlet

over me of the same stuff. I made but one nap of it all night.

Brother Chrysostom, who had promised me a hermit's dress, made up an

old gown of his own for me, and called me little brother Scipio. No

sooner did I appear in my religious uniform, than the ass's back

suffered for my genteel appearance in the eyes of the villagers. It

was who should give most to the little brother! so much were they

delighted with his spruce figure.

The easy, slothful life I led with the old hermit could not be very

revolting to a boy of my age. On the contrary, it suited my taste so

exactly, that I should have continued it to this time, but that the

fates and destinies were weaving a more complicated tissue for my

future years. It was cast in the figure of my nativity, early to

rouse myself from the effeminacy of a religious life, and to take

leave of brother Chrysostom after the following manner.

I often observed the old man at work upon his pillow, unsewing and

sewing it up again; and one day, I saw him put in some money. This

circumstance excited a tingling curiosity, which I promised myself to

satisfy the first time he went to Toledo, as he generally did once a

week. I waited impatiently for the day, but as yet, without any

other motive than the mere desire of prying. At last the good man

went his way, and I unpicked his pillow, where I found, among the

stuffing, the amount of about fifty crowns in all sorts of coin.

This treasure must have accumulated from the gratitude of the

peasantry, whom the hermit had cured by his nostrums, and of their

wives, who had become pregnant by virtue of his spiritual

interference. But however it got there, I no sooner set my eyes on

the money, which might be mine without any one near me to say nay,

than the gypsy voice of nature and pedigree spoke within me. An

inextinguishable itch of pilfering tingled in my veins, and proved

that we come into the world with the mark of our descent, and with

our characters about us. I yielded to the temptation without a

struggle, tied up my booty in a canvas bag where we kept our combs

and night-caps; then, having laid aside the hermit's and resumed my

foundling's dress, got clear off from the hermitage, and hugged my

bag as though it had contained the boundless treasure of the Indies.

You have heard my first exploit, continued Scipio, and I doubt not

but you will expect a succession of similar practices. Your

anticipations will not be disappointed; for there are many such

evidences of genius behind, before I come to those of my actions

which prove me good as well as clever; but I shall come to them, and

you will be convinced by the sequel, that a scoundrel born may be

licked into virtue, as the cub of a bear into shape.

Child as I was, I knew better than to take the Toledo road; it would

have been exposing myself to the hazard of meeting friar Chrysostom,

who would have balanced accounts with me on a very thriftless

principle. I therefore travelled in another direction, leading to

the village of Galves, where I stopped at an inn kept by a landlady

who was a widow of forty, and hung out the bunch of grapes to a very

good purpose. This good woman no sooner kenned me, than, judging by

my dress that I must be a truant from the orphan school, she asked

who I was and whither I was going. I answered that, having lost my

father and mother, I was looking for a place. Can you read, my dear?

said she. I assured her that I could read, and write, too, with the

best of them. In point of fact I could just form my letters, and

join them so as to look a little like writing; and that was clerkship

enough for a village pothouse. Then I will take you into my service,

replied the hostess. You may earn your board easily enough by

scoring up the customers and keeping my ledger. I shall give you no

wages, because this inn is frequented by very genteel company, who

never forget the waiters. You may reckon upon very considerable

perquisites.

I clinched the bargain, reserving to myself, as you may suppose, the

right of emigration whenever my abode at Galves should cease to be

pleasant. No sooner was I settled in my place, than a weight lay

heavy on my mind. I did not wish it to be known that I had money;

and it was no easy matter to devise where it could be hidden, so as

that what was sauce for the goose should not be sauce for the gander.

I was not yet well enough acquainted with the house to trust the

places obviously most proper for such a deposit. What a source of

embarrassment is great wealth! I determined, however, on a corner of

our granary under some straw; and, believing it to be safer there

than anywhere else, made myself as easy about it as I well could.

The household consisted of three servants--a lubberly ostler, a young

Galician chambermaid, and myself. Each of us sponged what we could

upon travellers, whether on foot or on horseback. I always came in

for some small change, when the bill was paid. Then the equestrians

gave something to the ostler, for taking care of their beasts; but as

for our female fellow-servant, the muleteers who passed that way

chucked her under the chin, and gave her more crowns than we got

farthings. I had no sooner realized a penny, than away it went to

the granary, and slept with its precursors; so that the higher rose

my heap, the more greedy did my little heart become. Sometimes would

I kiss the hallowed images of my idolatry, and look at them with a

devotional glow which few worshippers feel but those whose religion

is their gold.

This inordinate passion sent me back and fore to gratify it at least

thirty times a day. I often met the landlady on the staircase. She,

being naturally of a suspicious temper, had a mind to find out one

day what could carry me every minute to the corn loft. She therefore

went up and began rummaging about everywhere, supposing perhaps that

it was my receptacle for articles purloined in the house. Of course

she did not forget to pull the straw about; and behold, there was my

bag! Two hands in a dish and one in a purse, was not one of her

proverbs; so that, finding the contents in crowns and pistoles, she

thought, or seemed to think, that the money was lawfully and honestly

hers. At least she had possession, and that is nine points of the

law, though scarcely one of honesty. But to do the thing decently,

after calling me little wretch, little rascal, and so forth, she

ordered the ostler, a fellow without any will but hers, to give me a

hearty flogging; and then turned me out of doors, with this salt eel

for my breakfast, and a lady-like oath that no light-fingered gentry

should ever darken her doors. In vain did I protest and vow that I

had never wronged my mistress: she affirmed the direct contrary, and

her word would go further than mine at any time. Thus were friar

Chrysostom's savings transferred from one thief to a greater thief in

the thief-taker.

I wept over the loss of my money as a father over the death of his

only son; and though my tears could not bring back what I had lost,

they at least answered the purpose of exciting pity in some people,

who saw how bitterly they flowed, and among others in the parson, who

was accidentally going by. He seemed affected by my sad plight, and

took me home with him. There, to gain my confidence, or rather to

pump me, he began soothing my sorrows. How much this poor child is

to be pitied! said he. Is it any wonder if, thrown upon the wide

world at so tender an age, he has committed a bad action? Grown up

men are not always proof against the flesh or the devil. Then,

addressing me, Child, added he, from what part of Spain do you come,

and who are your parents? You have the look of family about you.

Open your heart to me confidentially, and depend upon it, I never

will desert you.

His reverence, by this kind and insinuating language, engaged me by

degrees to tell him all my history, without falsification or reserve.

I owned everything; and thus he moralized on the leading article of

my confession: My little friend, though hermits ought to lay up such

treasures as neither force nor fraud can wrest from them, that was no

excuse for your taking the measure of punishment into your own hands:

by robbing brother Chrysostom, you nevertheless sinned against that

article of the decalogue which tells you not to steal; but I will

engage to make the hostess return the money, and will punctually

remit it to the reverend friar at his hermitage: you may therefore

make your conscience perfectly easy on that score. Now, between

ourselves, my conscience was perfectly callous to everything like

compunction with respect to the crime in question. The parson, who

had his own ends to answer, had not done with me yet. My lad,

pursued he, I mean to take you by the hand, and find a good berth for

you. I shall send you to-morrow morning, by the carrier, to my

nephew, a canon of Toledo. He will not refuse, at my request, to

admit you upon his establishment, where they live like so many sons

of the church, rosily, merrily, and fatly, upon the rents of his

prebendal stall: you will be perfectly comfortable there, take my

word for it.

Patronage like this gave me so much encouragement, that I did not

throw away another thought either upon my bag or my whipping. My

mind was wholly occupied with the idea of living rosily, merrily, and

fatly, like a son of the church. The following day, at breakfast

time, there came, according to orders, a muleteer to the parsonage,

with two mules saddled and bridled. They helped me to mount one, the

muleteer flung his leg over the other, and we trotted for Toledo. My

fellow-traveller was a good, pleasant companion, and desired nothing

better than to indulge his humor at the expense of his neighbor. My

little volunteer, said he, you have a good friend in his reverence,

the minister of Galves. He could not give you a better proof of his

kindness than by placing you with his nephew the canon, whom I have

the honor of knowing, far beyond all question or comparison, to be

the cock of the chapter; and a hearty one he is. None of your

lantern-jawed saints, with Lent in his face, a cat-of-nine-tails on

his back, and a cholera morbus in his belly. No such thing! Our

doctor is rubicund in the jowl, efflorescent on the nose, with a

wicked eye at a bumper or a girl; militant against no earthly

pleasure, but most addicted to the good things of the table. You

will be as snug there as a bug in a blanket.

This hangman of a muleteer, perceiving with what exquisite

satisfaction I took in all this, went on tantalizing me with the joys

of an ecclesiastical life. He never dropped the subject till we got

to the village of Obisa, and stopped there to refresh our mules.

Then, while bustling about the inn, he accidentally dropped a paper

from his pocket, which I was cunning enough to pick up without his

seeing me, and took an opportunity of reading while he was in the

stable. It was a letter addressed to the governors and

superintendents of the orphan school, conceived in these terms:--

"Gentlemen: I consider it as an act at once of charity and of duty to

send you back a little truant; he seems a shrewd lad enough, and may

do very well with good looking after. By dint of hard and frequent

chastisement, I doubt not but you will ultimately bring him to a

sense of his own unworthiness and your benevolence. May a blessing

be vouchsafed on your pious and charitable labors for the early

extirpation of sin and wickedness!

(Signed) "THE MINISTER OF GALVES."

When I had finished reading this pleasant letter, which let me into

the good intentions of his reverence the rector, it required little

deliberation to determine what I was to do: from the inn to the banks

of the Tagus, a space of three good miles, was but a hop, step, and

jump. Fear lent me wings to escape from the governors of the

foundling hospital, whither I was absolutely resolved never to

return, having formed principles of taste diametrically opposite to

their method of teaching the classics. I went into Toledo with as

light a heart as if I had known where to get my daily bread. To be

sure, it is a town of ways and means, where a man who can live by his

wits need never die of hunger. Scarcely had I reached the high

street, when a well-dressed gentleman, by whom I brushed, caught me

by the arm, saying, My little fellow, do you want a place? You are

just such a smart lad as I was looking for. And you are just the

master for my money, answered I. Since that is the case, rejoined

he, you are mine from this moment, and have only to follow me, which

I did without asking any more questions.

This spark, about the age of thirty, and bearing the name of Don

Abel, lodged in very handsome ready-furnished apartments. He was by

profession a blacklegs; and the following was the nature of our

engagement. In the morning I got him as much tobacco as would smoke

five or six pipes; brushed his clothes, and ran for a barber to shave

him and trim his whiskers; after which he made the circle of the

tennis-courts, whence he never returned home till eleven or twelve at

night. But every morning, at going out, he gave me three reals for

the expenses of the day, leaving me master of my own time till ten

o'clock in the evening; and, provided I was within doors by his

return, all was well. He gave me a livery besides, in which I looked

like a little lackey of illicit love. I took very kindly to my

condition, and certainly could not have met with any more congenial

with my temper.

Such and so happy had been my way of life for nearly a month, when my

employer inquired whether I liked his service; and on my answer in

the affirmative, Well, then! resumed he, to-morrow we shall set out

for Seville, whither my concerns call me. You will not be sorry to

see the capital of Andalusia. "He that hath not Seville seen," says

the proverb, "Is no traveller I ween." I engaged at once to follow

him all over the world. On that very day, the Seville carrier

fetched away a large trunk with my master's wardrobe, and on the next

morning we were on the road for Andalusia.

Signor Don Abel was so lucky at play, that he never lost but when it

was convenient; but then it was seldom convenient to stay long in a

place, because those who are always losers find out, at last, that

though chance is a dangerous antagonist, certainly it is a desperate

one; and that accounted for our journey. On our arrival at Seville,

we took lodgings near the Cordova gate, and resumed the same mode of

life as at Toledo. But my master found some difference between the

two towns. The Seville tennis-courts could produce players equally

in fortune's good graces with himself; so that he sometimes came home

a good deal out of humor. One morning, when he was biting the bridle

for the loss of a hundred pistoles the day before, he asked why I had

not carried his linen to the laundress. I pleaded forgetfulness.

Thereupon, flying into a passion, he gave me half-a-dozen boxes on

the ear in such a style, as to kindle an illumination in my blinking

eyes, to which the glories of Solomon's temple were no more to be

compared, than the torches in a Candlemas procession to a rush-light.

There is for you, you little scoundrel! said he; take that, and learn

to mind your business. Must I be eternally at your heels to remind

you of what you are to do? Are your brains in your belly, and all

your wits in your grinders? You are not a downright idiot. Then why

not prevent my wants and anticipate my orders? After this

experimental lecture, he went out for the day, leaving me in high

dudgeon at a reprimand so much in the manner of my friend the ostler,

for such a trifle as not getting up his things for the wash.

I could never learn what happened to him a short time after at a

tennis-court; but one evening he came home in a terrible heat.

Scipio, said he, I am bent on going to Italy, and must embark the day

after to-morrow on board a vessel bound for Genoa. I have my reasons

for making this little excursion; of course you will be glad to

attend me, and to profit by so fine an opportunity of seeing the

loveliest country on the face of the earth. My tongue gave consent;

but with a salvo in my heart, and a bargain with my revenge, to give

him the slip just at the moment of embarkation. This was so

delightful a scheme, that I could not help imparting it to a bully by

profession, whom I met in the street. During my abode in Seville, I

had picked up some awkward acquaintance, and this was one of the most

ungainly. I told him how and why my ears had been boxed, and then

communicated my project of running away from Don Abel just before the

ship was to sail, begging to know what he thought of the plan.

My bluff adviser puckered his eyebrows while he listened, and fiddled

with his fingers about his whiskers: then, blaming my master very

seriously, My little hero, said he, you are eternally disgraced, can

never show your face again, if you sit down quietly with so paltry a

satisfaction as what you propose. To let Don Abel go off by himself

would be a poor revenge for wrongs like yours; the punishment should

be proportioned to his crime. Let us fine him to the full amount of

his purse and effects, which we will share like brothers after he is

gone. Now, it is to be noted that though thieving fell in very

naturally with the bent of my genius, the proposal rather startled

me, as the robbery was upon a large scale for so young an apprentice.

And yet the arch deceiver of my innocence found the means of working

me up to the perpetration, so that the result of our enterprise was

as follows: This glorious ruffian, a tall, brawny fellow, came in the

evening about twilight to our lodging. I showed my master's

travelling trunk ready packed, and asked him whether he could carry

so heavy a load upon his shoulders. So heavy as that! said he: show

me where a transfer of property is to be made in my favor, and I

could run with Noah's ark to the top of Mount Ararat. To prove his

words, he felt the trunk, flung it carelessly over his back, and

scampered down stairs. I followed nimbly; and we had just got to the

street door, when Don Abel, brought home in the nick of time by the

ascendency of his lucky stars, stood like an apparition, to appall

our guilty souls.

Whither are you going with that trunk? said he. I was so taken by

surprise, that my assurance failed me; and broad-shoulders, finding

that he had drawn a blank in the lottery, threw down his booty, and

took to his heels, rather than be troubled for an explanation. Once

more, whither are you going with that trunk? said my master. Sir,

answered I, with all the honest simplicity of a criminal pleading in

arrest of judgment, I was going to put it on board the vessel, that

we might have the less to do to-morrow, before we embark ourselves.

Indeed! Then you know, retorted he, in what ship I have taken my

passage? No, sir, replied I; but those who can talk Latin may always

find their way to Rome: I should have inquired at the port, and

somebody would have informed me. At this explanation, which left his

opinion where it found it, he darted a furious glance at me. I

thought, for all the world, he was going to cuff me again about the

head. Who ordered you, cried he, to take my trunk out of this house?

You, your own self, said I. Can you possibly have forgotten how you

rated me but a few days ago? Did not you tell me, with a flea in my

ear, that you would have me prevent your wants, and do beforehand

from my own head whatever your service might require? Now, not to be

threshed a second time for want of forethought, I was seeing your

trunk safe and soon enough on board. On this the gamester, finding

that I had cut my teeth of wisdom sooner than suited his purpose,

turned me off very coolly, saying, Go about your business, Master

Scipio, and speed as you may deserve. I do not like to play with

folks who are in the habit of revoking. Get out of my sight, or I

shall set your solfeggio in a crying key.

I spared him the trouble of telling me to go twice. Off I shot like

an arrow, for fear he should unfledge me by taking away my livery.

When distant enough to slacken my pace, I walked along the streets,

musing whither I might betake myself for a night's lodging, with only

two reals in my pocket. The gate of the archbishop's palace at

length stared me in the face; and, as his grace's supper was then

dressing, a savory odor exhaled from the kitchens, impregnating the

gale with soup and sauce for a mile round. Ods haricots and cutlets!

thought I; it would be no hard matter for me to dispense with one of

those little side dishes, which will be of no use to the archbishop

but to make out the figure of his table: nay, I would be contented

only just to dip in my four fingers and thumb, and then to sup like a

bear upon suckings. But how to accomplish it! Is there no way of

bringing these choice morsels to a better test than that of smell?

And why not? Hunger, they say, will break through stone walls. On

this idea did I set my wits to work; and, by dint of conning over the

subject, a stratagem struck me, which set my lungs as well as

appetite in motion, just as the old carpenter kept bawling, "I have

found it," like a madman, when he had hit the right nail of his

proposition on the head. I ran into the court of the palace, and

made the best of my way to the kitchens, calling out with all my

might, "Help! help!" as if some assassin had been at my heels.

At my reiterated cries, Master Diego, the archbishop's cook, ran with

three or four kitchen drudges to learn what was the matter, and

seeing only me, asked why I roared so loud. Ah, good sir, answered

I, with every token of exquisite distress, for mercy's sake and for

St. Polycarp's, save me, I beseech you, from the fury of a blusterer,

who swears he will kill me. But where is this disturber of the

public peace? cried Diego. You have no one to quarrel with but

yourself; for I do not see so much as a cat to spit at you. Go your

ways, my little man, and do not be afraid; it is evidently some wag

who has been playing upon your cowardice for his diversion; but he

knew better than to follow you within these walls, for we would have

cut his ears off at the least. No, no, said I, it was for no

laughing matter that he ran after me. He is a noted footpad, and

meant to rob me; I am certain that he is now waiting for me at the

corner of the street. Then he may wait long enough, replied the

knight of the iron spit; for you shall stay here till to-morrow. You

shall sup with us, and we will give you a bed.

I was out of my little wits with joy at the mention of these last

tidings; and it was like the turnpike road to paradise after crossing

an Arabian desert, when, being led by Master Diego through the

kitchens, I there saw my lord archbishop's supper, and the stew-pans

in the last throes of parturition. There were fifteen accountable

souls--for I reckoned them up--in attendance on the labor; but the

litter of dishes far outnumbered the fecundity of nature in her most

prolific mood: so much more gracious and bountiful is providence to

the heads of the church in the indulgence of their appetites, than

mindful of the worthless brute creation in the propagation of its

kind. Here it was, at the fountain head of prelacy, inhaling an

atmosphere of gravy, instead of just snuffing the scent as it lay

upon the breeze, that I first shook hands with sensuality. I had the

honor of supping with the scullions, and of sleeping in their

room--an initiation of friendship so sincere and strong, that on the

following day, when I went to thank Master Diego for his goodness in

vouchsafing me a refuge, he said, Our kitchen lads have been with me

in a body, to declare how excessively delighted they are with your

manners, and to propose having you among them as a fellow-servant.

How should you, on your part, like to make one of the society? I

answered that with such a feather in my cap, I should be the vainest

and the happiest of mortals. Then so be it, my friend, replied he;

consider yourself henceforth as a buttress of the hierarchy. With

this invitation, he introduced me to the major-domo, who thought he

saw talent enough in me for a turnspit.

No sooner was I in possession of so honorable an office, than Master

Diego, following the practice of cooks in great houses, who pamper up

their pretty dears in private with all sorts of good things, selected

me to supply a lady in the neighborhood with a regular table of

butcher's meat, poultry, and game. This good friend of his was a

widow on the right side of thirty, very pretty, very lively, and to

all appearance contenting herself with cupboard love for her cook.

His generous passion was not confined to furnishing her with bread,

meat, and garnish; she drank her wine too, and the archbishop was her

wine-merchant.

The improvement of my parts kept pace with that of my carnal

condition in his grace's palace, where I gave a specimen of rising

genius still ringing on the trump of fame at Seville. The pages and

some others of the household had a mind to get up a play on my lord

archbishop's birthday. They chose a popular Spanish tragedy, and,

wanting a boy about my age to personate the young King of Leon, cast

me for the part. The major-domo, a great spouter, undertook to train

me for the stage, and, after a few lessons, pronounced that I should

not be the worst actor of the company. His grace not wishing to

starve so handsome a compliment to himself, no expense was spared in

getting it up magnificently. The largest hall in the palace was

fitted up as a theatre, with appropriate decorations. At the side

scene there was a bed of turf, on which I was to be discovered

asleep, when the Moors were to rush in and take me prisoner. When we

had got so forward with our rehearsals as to be sure of being ready

by the time fixed, the archbishop sent out cards of invitation to all

the principal families in the city.

At length the great, the important day arrived; and each performer

was big with the contrivance and adjustment of his dress. Mine was

brought by a tailor, accompanied by our major-domo, who, after taking

the trouble of drilling me at rehearsal, wished to see justice done

to my outward appearance. The tailor put me on a rich robe of blue

velvet, with hanging sleeves, gold lace, fringe, and buttons: the

major-domo himself crowned me with a pasteboard crown, studded with

false diamonds and real pearls. Moreover, they gave me a sash of

pink silk worked in silver; so that every new ornament was like a

quill-feather in the wing of a bird. At last, about dusk, the play

began. The curtain drew up for my soliloquy, the purport of which

was to express, in a roundabout, poetical way, that not being able to

defend myself from the influence of sleep, I was going to lie down

and take it as it came. To suit the action to the word, I sidled off

to the corner between the flat and the wings, and squatted down on my

bed of turf; but instead of going to sleep, according to promise, I

was hammering upon the means of getting into the street, and running

away with my coronation finery. A little private staircase, leading

under the theatre into the lower saloon, seemed to furnish the

probability of success. I slid away slyly, while the audience were

considering some necessary question of the play, and ran down the

staircase, through the saloon to the door, calling out, "Make way!

make way! I must change my dress, and run up again in a moment!"

They all made a lane, for fear of hindering me; so that in less than

two minutes I got clear out of the palace, under cover of the

darkness, and scampered to the house of my friend who saw gentlemen's

trunks safe on board.

He stared like a stuck pig at my equipment! But when I let him into

the why and the wherefore, he laughed ready to split his sides.

Then, shaking hands in the sincerity of his heart, because he

flattered himself with the hope of a pension on the King of Leon's

civil list, he wished me joy of so successful a first appearance, and

joined issue with the major-domo in the prognostic, that with

encouragement and practice I should turn out a first-rate actor, and

make no little noise in the world. After we had diverted ourselves

for some time at the expense of my manager and audience, I said to

the bully, What shall we do with this magnificent dress? Do not make

yourself uneasy about that, answered he. I know an honest broker,

without an atom of curiosity in his composition, who will buy or sell

anything with any person, provided that he gets the turn of the

market upon the transaction. I will fetch him to you to-morrow

morning. The knowing fellow was as good as his word; for he went out

early the next day, leaving me in bed, and returned two hours

afterwards with the broker, carrying a yellow bundle under his arm.

My friend, said he, give me leave to introduce Signor Ybagnez of

Segovia, who, in spite of the bad example set him by the trade in

general, trusts to fair dealing and small profits for a moderate

pittance and an unblemished character. He will tell you to a

fraction what the dress you want to part with is really worth, and

you may take his calculation as the balance of justice between man

and man. O, yes! to a nicety, said the broker. Else wherefore live

I in a Christian land, but to appraise for my neighbor as for myself?

To take a mean advantage never was, thank heaven! and at these years

never shall be imputed to Ybagnez of Segovia. Let us look a little

at those articles! You are the seller; I am the buyer! We have only

to agree upon an equitable price. Here they are, said the bully,

pulling them out: now own the truth,--was there ever anything more

magnificent? You do not often see such velvet: and then the

trimming! You cannot say too much of it, answered the salesman,

examining the suit with the prying eye of a dealer: it is of the very

first quality. And what think you of the pearls upon this crown?

resumed my friend. A little rounder, observed Ybagnez, and there

would be no setting a price upon them! However, take them as they

are, it is a very fine set, and I do not want to find fault about

trifles. Now, your common run of appraisers, under my circumstances,

would affect to disparage the goods for the sake of getting them

cheaper; one of those fellows would have the conscience to offer

twenty pistoles; but there is nothing like bargaining with an

upright, downright man! I will give forty at a word; take them or

leave them.

Had Ybagnez ventured up to a hundred, he would not have burned his

fingers; for the pearls alone would have fetched two hundred

anywhere. The bully, who went snacks, then said, Now only look!

What a mercy it is to fall into the hands of a man not of this world!

Signor Ybagnez estimates money as dross, in comparison of his

principles and his soul. He may die to-night, and yet not be taken

unprepared! This is too much! You make me blush, said the salesman

of principle and soul; but so far is true, that my price is always

fixed. Well, now, is it a bargain? The money down upon the nail

too! Stop a moment, answered the bully; my little friend must first

try on the clothes you have brought for him by my order: I am very

much mistaken if they will not just fit him. The salesman then,

untying his bundle, showed me a second-hand suit of dark cloth with

silver buttons. I got up, and got into it: too big for me every way!

but these gentlemen could have sworn it had been made to my measure.

Ybagnez put it at ten pistoles; and as he was an upright, downright

man, of fixed principle and soul, estimating money as dross in

comparison of integrity, his first price was of course his last. He

therefore took out his purse, and counted down thirty pistoles upon a

table; after which he packed up the King of Leon's regalia, and went

his way.

When he was gone, the bully said, I am very well satisfied with that

broker. And so he well might be; for I am certain he must have

received at least a hundred pistoles as hush-money. But there was no

reason why the broker's benevolence should pay the debts of my

gratitude: so he took half the money on the table, without saying

with your leave or by your leave, and suffered me to pocket the

remainder, with the following advice: My dear Scipio, with that

balance of fifteen pistoles, I would have you get out of this town as

fast as you can; for you may suppose that my lord archbishop will

ferret you out if you are above ground. It would grieve me to the

heart if, after having risen so superior to the prejudice of honesty,

you had the weakness to fall foul of what alone keeps it afloat--the

house of correction. I answered that it was my fixed purpose to make

myself scarce at Seville, and accordingly, after buying a hat and

some shirts, I travelled through vineyards and olive groves to the

ancient city of Carmona; and in three days afterwards arrived at

Cordova.

I put up at an inn close by the market-place, giving myself out for

the heir of a good family at Toledo, travelling for his pleasure. My

appearance did not belie the story, and a few pistoles, which I

contrived carelessly to chink within the landlord's hearing, pinned

his faith upon my veracity. Probably my unfledged youth might lead

him to take me for some graceless little truant who had robbed his

parents and run away. But that was no concern of his: he took the

thing just as I gave it him, for fear lest his curiosity should clash

with my continuance at his house. For six reals a day one could live

like a gentleman at this inn, where there was generally a

considerable concourse of company. About a dozen people sat down at

supper. It was whimsical enough; but the whole party plied their

knives and forks without speaking a word, except one man, who talked

incessantly, right or wrong, and made up for the silence of the rest

by his eternal babble. He affected to be a wit, to tell a good

story, and took great pains to make the good folks merry by his puns;

and accordingly they did laugh most inextinguishably; but it was at

him, not with him.

For my part I paid so little attention to the talk of this rattle,

that I should have got up from table without knowing what it was all

about, if he had not brought it home to my business and my bosom.

Gentlemen, cried he, just as supper was over, I have kept my best

story for the last; a very droll thing happened within these few days

at the archbishop of Seville's palace. I had it from a young fellow

of my acquaintance, who assures me that he was present at the time.

These words made my heart jump up into my throat, for I had no doubt

of this being my exploit--and so it turned out. This pleasant

gentleman related the facts as they actually happened, and even

carried the adventure to its conclusion, of which I was as yet

ignorant: but now you shall be made as wise as myself.

No sooner had I absconded, than the Moors, who were, according to the

progress of the fable and the rising of the interest, to lay violent

hands on me, appeared upon the stage, for the fell purpose of

surprising me on my bed of turf, where the author had given them

reason to expect me fast asleep; but when they thought they were just

going to capot the King of Leon, they found, to their surprise, that

both the king and the knave made a trick against them. Here was a

hole in the ballad! The actors all lost their cue; some of them

called me by name, others ran to look for me: here is a fellow

bawling as though his bellows would burst, there stands another

muttering to himself about the devil, just as if that reptile could

stand upright in such a presence! The archbishop, perceiving trouble

and confusion to lord it behind the scenes, asked what was the

matter. At the sound of the prelate's voice, a page, who was the

fiddle of the piece, came to the front and spoke thus: My lord

archbishop, ladies, and gentlemen! We are extremely sorry to inform

you, as players, but extremely glad, as men and Christians, that the

King of Leon is at present in no danger whatever of being taken

prisoner by the Moors: he has adopted effectual measures for the

security of his royal person; and to the royal person, as liberty

avails little without property, he has irrevocably attached the

crown, insignia, and robes. And a happy deliverance for himself and

Christendom! exclaimed the archbishop. He has done perfectly right

to escape from the enemies of our religion, and to burst from the

bonds in which their malice would have laid him. By this time,

probably, he has reached the confines of his kingdom, or may have

entered the capital. May no unlucky accident have retarded him on

his journey! And that the sin of none such may lie heavy on my

conscience, I beg leave very positively to make my pleasure known

that he may proceed unmolested by any interruption from this quarter;

I should be highly mortified, indeed, if his majesty's pious

endeavors were to be frustrated by the slightest indignity from the

ministers of that religion in whose cause he labors and suffers. The

prelate, having thus declared his acquiescence in the motives of my

flight, ordered my part to be read, and the play to be resumed.

_CHAPTER XI._

_CONTINUATION OF SCIPIO'S STORY._

As long as I had money in my purse, my landlord was cap in hand; but

the moment he began to suspect that the funds were low, he became

high and mighty, picked a German quarrel with me, and one morning,

before breakfast, begged it as a favor of me to march out of his

house. I followed his counsel as proudly as you please, and betook

me to a church belonging to the fathers of St. Dominic, where, while

mass was performing, an old beggar accosted me on the usual topic of

alms. I dropped some small change into his hat, which was truly the

orphan's mite, saying, at the same time, My friend, remember in your

prayers to mention a situation for me; if your petition is heard with

favor, it shall be all the better for you; hearty thanks and a

handsome poundage!

At these words, the beggar surveyed me up and down, from head to

foot, and answered, in a grave tone, What place would you wish to

have? I should like, replied I, to be footman in some family where I

should do well. He inquired whether the matter pressed. With all

possible importunity, said I; for unless I have the good luck to get

settled very soon, the alternative will be horrible; death by the

gripe of absolute famine, or a livelihood in the ranks of your

fraternity. If the latter were, after all, to be your lot, resumed

he, it certainly would be rather hard upon you, who have not been

brought up to our habits of life; but, with a little use and

practice, you would prefer our condition to service, which,

partiality apart, is far less respectable than the beggar's vocation.

Nevertheless, since you like a menial occupation better than leading

a free and independent life like me, you shall have a berth without

more ado. Mean as my appearance is, you must not measure my power by

it. Meet me here at the same hour to-morrow.

I took care to keep the appointment. Though at the spot before the

time, I had not long to wait before the beggar joined me, and told me

to follow him. I did so. He led me to a cellar not far from the

church, where he resided. We went in together, and sitting down on a

long bench, at least a hundred years the worse for wear, the

conversation took this turn on his part: A good action, as the

proverb says, always meets with its reward; you gave me alms

yesterday, and that has determined me to get you a place, which shall

be soon done, with a blessing on my endeavors. I know an old

Dominican, by name Father Alexis, a holy monk, a ghostly confessor.

I have the honor to do all his little odd jobs, performing my task

with so much discretion and good faith, that he always lends his

interest to me and my friends. I have spoken to him about you, and

in such terms as to prepossess him in your favor. You may be

introduced to his reverence whenever you please.

There is not a moment to be lost, said I to the old beggar; let us go

to the good monk immediately. The mendicant agreed, and led me by

the arm to Father Alexis, whom we found in his room, hard at work,

writing spiritual letters. He broke off to talk with me. As it was

the wish of the mendicant, he would do all in his power to serve me.

Having learned, pursued he, that Signor Balthasar Velasquez is in

want of a footboy, I wrote to him this morning on your behalf, and he

just sent me for answer, that he would take you without further

inquiry on my recommendation. This very day you may call on him from

me; he is one of my flock, and my very good friend. Thereupon the

monk preached to me for three quarters of an hour on my moral and

religious duties, and how to fulfil them in conscience and honor. He

enlarged principally on the obligation of serving Velasquez with

diligence and devotion, and then assured me that he would take care

and keep me in my place, provided my master had no very material

fault to find with me.

After having thanked the holy person for his goodness towards me, I

left the convent with the beggar, who told me that Signor Balthasar

Velasquez was an old woollen-draper, but with much simplicity and

good nature in his character. I doubt not, added he, but you will be

perfectly comfortable in his house. I begged to know his place of

residence, and repaired thither immediately, after promising to make

my gratitude manifest as soon as I had taken root in my new soil. I

went into a large shop, where two fashionable young apprentices were

walking up and down, practising new grimaces against the entrance of

the next customer. I inquired whether their master was at home,

saying that I wanted to speak with him from Father Alexis. At that

venerable name they showed me into the counting-house, where their

principal was turning over the ledger. I made a low bow, and coming

up to him, Sir, said I, Father Alexis ordered me to call here and

offer myself as a servant to your honor. Ah! my smart lad, answered

he, you are heartily welcome. It is enough that the holy man sent

you; and I shall take you in preference to three or four others who

have been recommended. It is a clear case; your wages begin from

this day.

A very short time in the family convinced me that the head of it was

just such a man as he had been described. In point of simplicity he

was every thing that could be wished; so exquisite a subject for

imposition, that it seemed next to an impossibility not to exercise

my craft upon such a handle. He had been a widower four years, and

had two children, a son of five-and-twenty, and a daughter in her

eleventh year. The girl, brought up by a severe duenna, under the

spiritual conduct of Father Alexis, walked in the high road of

virtue; but her brother, Gaspard Velasquez, though no pains had been

spared to make a good man of him, picked out for himself all the

vices of a young profligate. Sometimes he staid away from home two

or three days together; and if, on his return, his father ventured to

remonstrate in the least against his proceedings, Gaspard shut his

mouth at once, with a haughty toss of the head and an impertinent

answer.

Scipio, said the old man one day, my son is the plague of my life.

He is over head and ears in all kinds of debauchery: and yet there is

no accounting for it, since his education was by no means neglected.

I have given him the very best masters; and my friend Father Alexis

has done his utmost to train him up in the way he should go; but

there was no breaking him in; Master Gaspard ran restive, and bolted

into downright libertinism. You may perhaps tell me that I spared

the rod and spoiled the child. Quite otherwise! he was punished

whenever the occasion seemed to demand it; for, though good-tempered

at bottom, I am not to be played upon. I have even gone so far as to

lock him up; but that only made him more headstrong than before. In

short, he is one of those impracticable beings, on whom good example,

good advice, and a good horsewhip, are equally thrown away. If ever

he makes any figure in the world, it must be by a miracle from heaven.

Though my heart was not grievously wrung by the sorrows of this

unhappy father, sympathy was expected from me, and I condoled with

him accordingly. How much to be pitied you are, sir! said I.

Virtues like yours deserve to have been handed down in your progeny.

The event is quite the reverse, my good lad, answered he. Heaven

heard my prayer, and gave me a son, but converted the blessing into

an affliction. Among other grounds of complaint against Gaspard, I

may tell you, in confidence, there is one which gives me a great deal

of uneasiness; a vast longing to rob his old father, which he too

often finds the means of satisfying, in spite of all my caution.

Your predecessor played into his hands, and was turned away in

consequence. As for you, I flatter myself that my son will never be

able to tamper with your honesty. You will take my side of the

question; for doubtless Father Alexis has given you your lesson on

that head. You may rest assured of that, said I: for a good long

hour did his reverence lecture me on doing your will and pleasure

without let or hinderance; but I can assure you there was no need of

his saying anything about the matter. I feel within myself a sort of

call to serve you faithfully, and I promise to do it with a zeal

beyond all the temptations of the world to shake or lessen.

He who only hears one side is in danger of deciding partially. Young

Velasquez, a mixture of the fribble and the braggart, concluding from

the cut of my countenance that I was made up of mortal frailty, like

my predecessor, drew me aside to a snug corner, and there talked to

me after this fashion: Now mind what is said to you, my dear fellow;

you may think I do not know that you are set as a spy upon me by my

father; but take especial care how you proceed, for I can assure you

most sincerely, that the office is not without very considerable

inconvenience to those who undertake it. If ever I find that you

tell tales out of school, I will give you such a basting as you never

had in your life; but if you will make common cause with me, and a

fool of my father, you may buy golden returns of gratitude from your

humble servant. Do you wish me to deal with you upon the nail? You

shall go snacks in all that we can squeeze out of the old fellow.

You have only to take your choice: fall at once into the ranks either

of father or son; for neutrals will come worst off, where the

contending parties fight for their existence.

Sir, answered I, you make the shoe pinch very tight; it is

self-evident that there is nothing for me to do but to enlist under

your banners, though in my conscience it seems like a crying sin to

betray Signor Velasquez. That is no concern of yours, rejoined

Gaspard; he is an old hunks, who wants to keep me under his thumb; a

curmudgeon, who refuses me the rights of nature, in refusing to stand

to the expenses and repairs of my pleasures; for pleasured are the

necessaries of life at five-and-twenty. It is in this point of view

that you must form your opinion of my father. If that is the case,

so be it, sir, said I; there is no standing against so just a subject

of complaint. I am quite at your service to play second fiddle in

all your laudable enterprises; but let us take especial care to

conceal our good understanding, for fear, your faithful, humble

servant should be kicked out of doors. It will not be amiss, in my

poor opinion, for you to affect an extreme antipathy against me: some

good round of abuse would have a very pretty effect; you need not be

nice; all the blackguard terms in the dictionary will come at your

call. Nay, a box on the ear now and then, or a kick on the breech,

will break no squares; on the contrary, the more you express your

thorough dislike, the more Signor Balthasar will pin his faith upon

my sleeve. My cue will be, apparently, to avoid speaking to you if

possible. In waiting at table, I shall perform my little attentions

to you at arm's length; and whenever your honor may happen to be

called over the coals by the shopmen, you must not take it amiss if I

abuse you worse than a pickpocket.

As plain as chalk from cheese! cried young Velasquez at this last

hint; this is admirable, my friend; at your early age it is uncommon

to meet with such a talent for intrigue; I consider it as a most

happy omen for my purpose. With such a performer to play up to me, I

flatter myself the old codger will be pinched to the bone and left

penniless. You really carry your good opinion of me beyond what my

merit will justify, said I; some industry may fall to my share, but

not such exalted genius. But I shall do my utmost; and if my honest

endeavors fail, your candor must find excuses for my imbecility.

It was not long before Gaspard had proof positive that I was to a

hair's breadth the very man he wanted; and the following was

precisely the first trick I played into his hand. Balthasar's strong

box was in the good man's chamber, by his bed-side, a sort of

oratory, with a prayer-book always lying upon it. Every time I

looked that way, my eyes glistened with hope and pleasure; my heart

chuckled over the very idea of what might happen: Fair, sweet, cruel

box, will you forever be coy to my addresses? May I never experience

the heartfelt delight of possessing all your charms for better, for

worse? As I went into the room at pleasure, and only Gaspard was

warned off the premises, it happened one day that I watched his

father. The old gentleman, fancying himself unobserved of human eye,

after having opened his treasury and closed it fast again, hid the

key behind the hangings. I took an accurate observation of the

place, and communicated the discovery to my young master, who said,

with an improving hug, Ah! my dear Scipio, what glorious news you

bring! Our fortune is made, my dear fellow. I will furnish you with

wax; you shall take the impression of the key, and then our business

is done. There will be no difficulty in finding a benevolent

locksmith in Cordova, where, to do the place justice, there are as

many rogues as in any part of Spain.

Well! but why, said I to Gaspard, do you want a false key? We may

find our account in the proper one. Yes, answered he; but I am

afraid lest my father, through mistrust or whim, should take a fancy

to hiding it elsewhere; and the safest way is, to have one of our

own. I commended his precaution, and falling in with all his

principles, got ready for taking the impression of the key: this was

effected one morning early, while my old master was paying a visit to

father Alexis, with whom he for the most part held very long

conferences. I did not stop here, but availed myself of the key to

open the strong box, wherein an ample range of large and small bags

threw me into the most delightful perplexity imaginable. I did not

know which to choose, there was such a family likeness among them;

nevertheless, as the fear of being caught did not allow of any long

deliberation, I laid hands, hap-hazard, on the largest. Then,

locking the box carefully, and putting the key back again behind the

hangings, I got away out of the chamber with my booty, and hid it

under my bed, in a small closet where I lay.

Having performed this exploit so successfully, I ran back as fast as

my legs would carry me to young Velasquez, who was waiting at a house

where he had given me notice to meet him, and his delight was extreme

at the recital of what I had just done. He was so fully satisfied

with me, as to lavish caresses without number, and to offer me

thrice, in the fulness of his heart, half the contents of the bag,

which I did thrice refuse. No, no, sir, said I; this first bag is

yours, and yours only; apply it to your own uses and occasions, I

shall return forthwith to the strong box, where, as our lucky stars

have contrived it, there is money enough for both of us.

Accordingly, three days afterwards I carried off a second bag,

containing, like the first, five hundred crowns, of which I would

only handle the fourth part, let Gaspard be as pressing as he pleased

to force upon me a brotherly division, share and share alike.

As soon as this young man found himself so flush of money, and

consequently in a condition to gratify his hankering after women and

play, he gave himself up entirely to the devices of his own

imagination; nay, his evil genius pursued him so far as to make him

fall desperately in love with one of those female harpies, who devour

without remorse or intermission, and swallow up the largest fortunes.

His disbursements at her instigation were frightful; and thus it

became necessary for me to pay so many visits to the strong box, that

old Velasquez at length found out he had been robbed. Scipio, said

he one morning, I must give you a piece of information; some one robs

me, my friend; my strong box has been opened; several bags have been

taken out; that is a certain fact. Whom ought I to accuse of this

theft? or rather, who else but my son can have committed it? Gaspard

must have got by stealth into my chamber, or else you yourself must

have played booty with him; for I am tempted to believe you are in

league with him, though to outward appearance you do not set up your

horses together. And yet I am unwilling to harbor that suspicion,

because Father Alexis undertook to answer for your honesty. I gave

him to understand that, by the blessing of heaven on a good natural

disposition, my neighbors' goods had no temptation in my sight; and I

so happily suited the action to the lie, and the lie to the action,

that my judge pronounced a verdict of acquittal on the evidence of

grimace and hypocrisy.

Accordingly the old man dropped the subject; but for all that, there

was a general misgiving in his breast, and it would sometimes light

upon me: taking precautions, therefore, against our further attacks,

he had a new lock put to his strong box, and always carried the key

in his pocket. By these means, an embargo being laid on our traffic

with the bags, we looked excessively foolish, especially Gaspard,

who, being unable any longer to keep his nymph in her usual style,

knew very well that he was likely to be tossed out of her window. He

had, however, invention enough to devise an expedient for keeping his

head above water a few days longer; and that was neither more nor

less than to get into his clutches, in the form of a loan, my

dividend on the joint stock of the strong box. I refunded to the

last farthing; and this restitution, it is to be hoped, may be set

off as an anticipated act of justice to the old draper, in the person

of his heir.

The young man, having exhausted this scanty supply, and desperate of

any other, fell into a deep melancholy, and into ultimate

derangement. He no longer looked on his father in any other light

than as the bane of his life.. His frenzy broke out into the most

dreadful projects; so that, without listening to the voice of

consanguinity or nature, the wretch conceived the impious design of

poisoning him. He was not content with making me privy to the

atrocious design, but even proposed to render me the instrument of

parricide. At the very thought, my blood ran cold within me. Sir,

said I, is it possible that you are so rejected of heaven as to have

formed this horrid plot? What! is it in your nature to murder the

author of your existence? Shall Spain, the favored abode of the

Christian faith, bear witness to the commission of a crime, at the

first blush of. which transatlantic savages would recoil with

horror? No, my dear master, added I, throwing myself on my knees,

no, you will not be guilty of an action which would raise the hand of

all mankind against you, and be overtaken by an infamous punishment.

I pressed many arguments beside on Gaspard, to dissuade him from so

fearful an enterprise. How the deuce I came by all the moral and

religious topics which I brought to act against the fortress of his

despair, is more than I can account for; but it is certain that I

preached like a doctor of Salamanca, though a mere stripling, born of

a gypsy fortune-teller. And yet it was to no purpose that I

suggested the duty of communing with his own better resolutions, and

stoutly wrestling with the fiend who was lying in wait for his

immortal soul; my pious eloquence was dissipated into air. His head

hung sullenly on his bosom, and his tongue uttered no sound, in

answer to all my mollifying exhortations, so that there was every

reason to conclude he would not swerve from his purpose.

Hereupon, taking my own measures, I requested a private interview

with my old master; and being closeted with him, Sir, said I, allow

me to throw myself at your feet, and to implore your pity. In

pathetic accord with my moving accents, I prostrated myself before

him, with my face all bathed in tears. The merchant, surprised at

what he saw and heard, asked the cause of my distress. Remorse of

conscience and repentance, answered I; but neither repentance nor

remorse can ever wash out my guilt. I have been weak enough to give

ear to your son, and to be his accomplice in robbing you. To this

confession I added a sincere acknowledgment of all that had happened,

with the particulars of my late conversation with Gaspard, whose

design I laid open without the least reserve.

Bad as was the opinion which old Velasquez entertained of his son, he

could scarcely believe his ears. Nevertheless, finding no good

reason to distrust the truth of my account, Scipio, said he, raising

me from the ground, where I had till now been prostrate at his feet,

I forgive you in consideration of the important notice you have

communicated. Gaspard! pursued he, raising his voice up to the

loudness of anguish, does Gaspard aim a blow at my life? Ah!

ungrateful son, unnatural monster! better thou hadst never been born,

or stifled at thy birth, than to have been reared for the destruction

of thy father! What plea, what object, what palliation of the

atrocious deed? I furnished thee annually with a reasonable

allowance for thy pleasures, and what wouldst thou have more? Must I

have drained my fortune to the dregs to support thee in thy

extravagance? Having vented his feelings in this bitter apostrophe,

he enjoined secrecy on me, and told me to leave him alone, while he

considered how to act in so delicate a conjuncture.

I was very anxious to know what resolution this unhappy father would

take, when on that very day he sent for Gaspard, and addressed him

thus, without betraying the inward emotions of his heart: My son, I

have received a letter from Merida, purporting that if you are

disposed to marry, you may make a match with a very fine girl of

fifteen, with a handsome fortune in her pocket. If you have not

forsworn that happy and holy estate, we will set out to-morrow

morning by daybreak for Merida: you will see the lady in question,

and if she hits your fancy, the business may soon be settled.

Gaspard, pricking up his ears at a handsome fortune, and already

fingering the cash by anticipation, answered unhesitatingly that he

was ready to undertake the journey; and accordingly they departed the

following day at sunrise, without attendants, mounted on good mules.

Having reached the mountains of Fesira, in a delightful spot for the

operations of banditti, but terror-stirring to the timid souls of

travellers, Balthasar dismounted, and desired his son to do likewise.

The young man obeyed, but expressed his surprise at such a

requisition, in so lonely a place. I will tell you the reason

presently, answered the old man, darting at him a look of mingled

grief and anger: We are not going to Merida; and the alleged

courtship was only an invention of mine, for the purpose of drawing

you hither. I am not ignorant, ungrateful and unnatural son, I am

not uninformed of your meditated crime. I am aware that a poison,

prepared by your hands, was to have been administered to me; but, mad

as you are, could it enter into your contemplation that my life could

have been invaded with impunity by such means? How fatally mistaken!

Your crime would soon have been detected, and you would have perished

under the hands of the executioner. There is a safer way of glutting

your fell malice, without exposing yourself to an ignominious death;

we are here without witnesses, and in a place where daily murders are

perpetrated; since you are so thirsty after my blood, plunge your

dagger into my bosom: the assassination will naturally be laid at the

door of some banditti. After these words, Balthasar, laying his

breast bare, and pointing to his heart, ended with this challenge:

Here, Gaspard, strike deep enough, strike home; make me pay that

forfeit for having engendered such a disgrace to human nature, and no

more than what is due to so monstrous a production.

Young Velasquez, struck by this reproach as by a thunderbolt, far

from pleading in his own justification, fell instantly lifeless at

his father's feet. The good old man, hailing the germ of repentance

in this unfeigned testimony of shame, could not help yielding to

paternal weakness; he made all possible haste to give his assistance;

but Gaspard had no sooner recovered the use of his senses, than,

unable to stand in the presence of a father so justly offended, he

made an effort to raise himself from the ground, then sprang upon his

mule, and galloped out of sight without saying one word. Balthasar

suffered him to take his own course, and returned to Cordova, little

doubting but conscience would play its part in revenging his wrongs.

Six months afterwards it appeared that the culprit had thrown himself

into the Carthusian convent at Seville, there to pass the remnant of

his days in penance.

_CHAPTER XII._

_CONCLUSION OF SCIPIO'S STORY._