Last night Dr Johnson gave us an account of the whole process of
tanning, and of the nature of milk, and the various operations upon
it, as making whey, &c. His variety of information is surprizing; and
it gives one much satisfaction to find such a man bestowing his
attention on the useful arts of life. Ulinish was much struck with his
knowledge; and said, 'He is a great orator, sir; it is musick to hear
this man speak.' A strange thought struck me, to try if he knew any
thing of an art, or whatever it should be called, which is no doubt
very useful in life, but which lies far out of the way of a
philosopher and poet; I mean the trade of a butcher. I enticed him
into the subject, by connecting it with the various researches into
the manners and customs of uncivilized nations, that have been made by
our late navigators into the South Seas. I began with observing, that
Mr (now Sir Joseph) Banks tells us, that the art of slaughtering
animals was not known in Otaheite, for, instead of bleeding to death
their dogs (a common food with them), they strangle them. This he told
me himself; and I supposed that their hogs were killed in the same
way. Dr Johnson said, 'This must be owing to their not having knives,
though they have sharp stones with which they can cut a carcase in
pieces tolerably.' By degrees, he shewed that he knew something even
of butchery. 'Different animals,' said he, 'are killed differently. An
ox is knocked down, and a calf stunned; but a sheep has its throat
cut, without any thing being done to stupify it. The butchers have no
view to the ease of the animals, but only to make them quiet, for
their own safety and convenience. A sheep can give them little
trouble. Hales is of opinion, that every animal should be blooded,
without having any blow given to it, because it bleeds better.'
BOSWELL. 'That would be cruel.' JOHNSON. 'No, sir; there is not much
pain, if the jugular vein be properly cut.' Pursuing the subject, he
said, the kennels of Southwark ran with blood two or three days in the
week; that he was afraid there were slaughter-houses in more streets
in London than one supposes (speaking with a kind of horrour of
butchering), and yet, he added, 'any of us would kill a cow, rather
than not have beef.' I said we COULD not. 'Yes,' said he, 'any one
may. The business of a butcher is a trade indeed, that is to say,
there is an apprenticeship served to it; but it may be learnt in a
month.'
I mentioned a club in London, at the Boar's Head in Eastcheap, the
very tavern where Falstaff and his joyous companions met; the members
of which all assume Shakspeare's characters. One is Falstaff, another
Prince Henry, another Bardolph, and so on. JOHNSON. 'Don't be of it,
sir. Now that you have a name, you must be careful to avoid many
things, not bad in themselves, but which will lessen your character.
[Footnote: I do not see why I might not have been of this club without
lessening my character. But Dr Johnson's caution against supposing
one's self concealed in London, may be very useful to prevent some
people from doing many things, not only foolish, but criminal.] This
every man who has a name must observe. A man who is not publickly
known may live in London as he pleases, without any notice being taken
of him; but it is wonderful how a person of any consequence is
watched. There was a Member of Parliament, who wanted to prepare
himself to speak on a question that was to come in the House; and he
and I were to talk it over together. He did not wish it should be
known that he talked with me; so he would not let me come to his
house, but came to mine. Some time after he had made his speech in the
house, Mrs Cholmondeley, a very airy lady, told me, "Well, you could
make nothing of him!" naming the gentleman, which was a proof that he
was watched. I had once some business to do for government, and I went
to Lord North's. Precaution was taken that it should not be known. It
was dark before I went; yet a few days after I was told, "Well, you
have been with Lord North." That the door of the Prime Minister should
be watched, is not strange; but that a Member of Parliament should be
watched, or that my door should be watched, is wonderful.'
We set out this morning on our way to Talisker, in Ulinish's boat,
having taken leave of him and his family. Mr Donald M'Queen still
favoured us with his company, for which we were much obliged to him.
As we sailed along Dr Johnson got into one of his fits of railing at
the Scots. He owned that they had been a very learned nation for a
hundred years, from about 1550 to about 1650; but that they afforded
the only instance of a people among whom the arts of civil life did
not advance in proportion with learning; that they had hardly any
trade, any money, or any elegance, before the Union; that it was
strange that, with all the advantages possessed by other nations, they
had not any of those conveniences and embellishments which are the
fruit of industry, till they came in contact with a civilized people.
'We have taught you,' said he, 'and we'll do the same in time to all
barbarous nations, to the Cherokees, and at last to the Ouran-
Outangs'; laughing with as much glee as if Monboddo had been present.
BOSWELL. 'We had wine before the Union.' JOHNSON. 'No, sir; you had
some weak stuff, the refuse of France, which would not make you
drunk.' BOSWELL. 'I assure you, sir, there was a great deal of
drunkenness.' JOHNSON. 'No, sir; there were people who died of
dropsies, which they contracted in trying to get drunk.'
I must here gleen some of his conversation at Ulinish, which I have
omitted. He repeated his remark, that a man in a ship was worse than a
man in a jail. 'The man in a jail,' said he, 'has more room, better
food, and commonly better company, and is in safety.' 'Ay; but,' said
Mr M'Queen, 'the man in the ship has the pleasing hope of getting to
shore.' JOHNSON. 'Sir, I am not talking of a man's getting to shore;
but a man while he is in a ship: and then, I say, he is worse than a
man while he is in a jail. A man in a jail MAY have the "pleasing
hope" of getting out. A man confined for only a limited time, actually
HAS it.' M'Leod mentioned his schemes for carrying on fisheries with
spirit, and that he would wish to understand the construction of
boats. I suggested that he might go to a dock-yard and work, as Peter
the Great did. JOHNSON. 'Nay, sir, he need not work. Peter the Great
had not the sense to see that the mere mechanical work may be done by
any body, and that there is the same art in constructing a vessel,
whether the boards are well or ill wrought. Sir Christopher Wren might
as well have served his time to a bricklayer, and first, indeed, to a
brick-maker.'
There is a beautiful little island in the Loch of Dunvegan, called
Isa. M'Leod said, he would give it to Dr Johnson, on condition of his
residing on it three months in the year; nay one month. Dr Johnson was
highly amused with the fancy. I have seen him please himself with
little things, even with mere ideas like the present. He talked a
great deal of this island--how he would build a house there, how he
would fortify it, how he would have cannon, how he would plant, how he
would sally out and TAKE the isle of Muck; and then he laughed with
uncommon glee, and could hardly leave off. I have seen him do so at a
small matter that struck him, and was a sport to no one else. Mr
Langton told me, that one night he did so while the company were all
grave about him: only Garrick, in his significant smart manner,
darting his eyes around, exclaimed, 'VERY jocose, to be sure!' M'Leod
encouraged the fancy of Dr Johnson's becoming owner of an island; told
him, that it was the practice in this country to name every man by his
lands; and begged leave to drink to him in that mode: 'Island Isa,
your health!' Ulinish, Talisker, Mr M'Queen, and I, all joined in our
different manners, while Dr Johnson bowed to each, with much good
humour.
We had good weather, and a fine sail this day. The shore was varied
with hills, and rocks, and corn-fields, and bushes, which are here
dignified with the name of natural wood. We landed near the house of
Ferneley, a farm possessed by another gentleman of the name of M'Leod,
who, expecting our arrival, was waiting on the shore, with a horse for
Dr Johnson. The rest of us walked. At dinner, I expressed to M'Leod
the joy which I had in seeing him on such cordial terms with his clan.
'Government,' said he, 'has deprived us of our ancient power; but it
cannot deprive us of our domestick satisfactions. I would rather drink
punch in one of their houses' (meaning the houses of his people) 'than
be enabled by their hardships, to have claret in my own.' This should
be the sentiment of every chieftain. All that he can get by raising
his rents, is more luxury in his own house. Is it not better to share
the profits of his estate, to a certain degree, with his kinsmen, and
thus have both social intercourse and patriarchal influence?
We had a very good ride, for about three miles, to Talisker, where
Colonel M'Leod introduced us to his lady. We found here Mr Donald
M'Lean, the young Laird of Col (nephew to Talisker), to whom I
delivered the letter with which I had been favoured by his uncle,
Professor M'Leod, at Aberdeen. He was a little lively young man. We
found he had been a good deal in England, studying farming, and was
resolved to improve the value of his father's lands, without
oppressing his tenants, or losing the ancient Highland fashions.
Talisker is a better place than one commonly finds in Sky. It is
situated in a rich bottom. Before it is a wide expanse of sea, on each
hand of which are immense rocks; and, at some distance in the sea,
there are three columnal rocks rising to sharp points. The billows
break with prodigious force and noise on the coast of Talisker. There
are here a good many well-grown trees. Talisker is an extensive farm.
The possessor of it has, for several generations, been the next heir
to M'Leod, as there has been but one son always in that family. The
court before the house is most injudiciously paved with the round
blueish-grey pebbles which are found upon the sea-shore; so that you
walk as if upon cannon-balls driven into the ground.
After supper, I talked of the assiduity of the Scottish clergy, in
visiting and privately instructing their parishioners, and observed
how much in this they excelled the English clergy. Dr Johnson would
not let this pass. He tried to turn it off, by saying, 'There are
different ways of instructing. Our clergy pray and preach.' M'Leod and
I pressed the subject, upon which he grew warm, and broke forth: 'I do
not believe your people are better instructed. If they are, it is the
blind leading the blind; for your clergy are not instructed
themselves.' Thinking he had gone a little too far, he checked
himself, and added, 'When I talk of the ignorance of your clergy, I
talk of them as a body: I do not mean that there are not individuals
who are learned' (looking at Mr M'Queen). 'I suppose there are such
among the clergy in Muscovy. The clergy of England have produced the
most valuable books in support of religion, both in theory and
practice. What have your clergy done, since you sunk into
presbyterianism? Can you name one book of any value, on a religious
subject, written by them?' We were silent. 'I'll help you. Forbes
wrote very well; but I believe he wrote before episcopacy was quite
extinguished.' And then pausing a little, he said, 'Yes, you have
Wishart against Repentance.' [Footnote: This was a dexterous mode of
description, for the purpose of his argument; for what he alluded to
was, a sermon published by the learned Dr William Wishart, formerly
principal of the college at Edinburgh, to warn men AGAINST confiding
in a death-bed REPENTANCE, of the inefficacy of which he entertained
notions very different from those of Dr Johnson.] BOSWELL. 'But, sir,
we are not contending for the superior learning of our clergy, but for
their superior assiduity.' He bore us down again, with thundering
against their ignorance, and said to me, 'I see you have not been well
taught; for you have not charity.' He had been in some measure forced
into this warmth, by the exulting air which I assumed; for, when he
began, he said, 'Since you will drive the nail!' He again thought of
good Mr M'Queen, and, taking him by the hand, said, 'Sir, I did not
mean any disrespect to you.'
Here I must observe, that he conquered by deserting his ground, and
not meeting the argument as I had put it. The assiduity of the
Scottish clergy is certainly greater than that of the English. His
taking up the topick of their not having so much learning, was, though
ingenious, yet a fallacy in logick. It was as if there should be a
dispute whether a man's hair is well dressed, and Dr Johnson should
say, 'Sir, his hair cannot be well dressed; for he has a dirty shirt.
No man who has not clean linen has his hair well dressed.' When some
days afterwards he read this passage, he said, 'No, sir; I did not say
that a man's hair could not be well dressed because he has not clean
linen, but because he is bald.'
He used one argument against the Scottish clergy being learned, which
I doubt was not good. 'As we believe a man dead till we know that he
is alive; so we believe men ignorant till we know that they are
learned.' Now our maxim in law is, to presume a man alive, till we
know he is dead. However, indeed, it may be answered, that we must
first know he has lived; and that we have never known the learning of
the Scottish clergy. Mr M'Queen, though he was of opinion that Dr
Johnson had deserted the point really in dispute, was much pleased
with what he said, and owned to me, he thought it very just; and Mrs
M'Leod was so much captivated by his eloquence, that she told me 'I
was a good advocate for a bad cause.'