CONFLICTING STATEMENTS.

The possibility of a super-dancing-saloon being erected on the site of

Apsley House is, we fear, likely to be relegated to the limbo of lost

opportunities.

It will be remembered that a few weeks ago London in general and the

West-End in particular was excited and delighted by the announcement

that Apsley House had been sold to an influential syndicate and

would shortly be converted into a massive and monumental block,

forty storeys high, crowned with the dancing-saloon and including

a concert-hall with the most powerful organ in the world, and

a swimming-bath with salt water conveyed by a special pipe from

Brighton.

It will also be remembered that Mr. Chumpley Swope, the chairman of

the syndicate, issued a powerful manifesto in which he explained

the purely humanitarian motives of the enterprise--to obliterate

the militaristic associations of the site; to replace an unsightly

building by a fabric which would be one of the architectural glories

of London, and simultaneously to cheer the patients in St. George's

Hospital with the sounds of harmony by night.

Unhappily the realisation of these beneficent and artistic designs

seems likely to be indefinitely postponed, to judge from the

authoritative statements made to our representative by Mr. Doremus

Pomerene, architect to the owners, and by Mr. Chumpley Swope himself.

"There never was any idea," said Mr. Pomerene, "in the minds of

the present owners, Mr. Otis Flather and Mr. Virgil Onderdonk,

of converting the site of Apsley House to the uses of a

super-dancing-saloon. Mr. Flather is a convinced opponent of the

dancing mania and President of the Anti-Tarantulation League, while

Mr. Onderdonk has always been a profound admirer of the great Duke

of WELLINGTON. Subject to the approval of the present Duke it is our

intention to re-erect Apsley House on the Playing Fields at Eton, and

utilise the site for the building of flats for the New Poor."

"The erection of a Neo-Georgian super-dancing-saloon on the Piccadilly

frontage of Apsley House," said Mr. Chumpley Swope, "has long been the

dearest dream of my heart. My first negotiations with Messrs. Shumway

and Prudden were conducted for the express purpose of facilitating the

realisation of this project. Moreover, when Mr. Flather joined me in

the purchase of the entire site his representative, Mr. Onderdonk, was

fully aware of my plans and expressed his cordial approval thereof.

"Eventually my friends and I accepted offers made to us by Mr. Flather

whereby the entire site was vested in him, subject to an agreement

that the Piccadilly frontage to a depth of two hundred kilowatts

should be reserved for the erection of the dancing-saloon, the

concert-hall and the swimming-bath.

"Owing however to the difficulties connected with the laying of the

pipe from Brighton and the unaccountable and irrational hostility

displayed by the Governing Body of St. George's Hospital the plan of

erecting this Temple of Terpsichore has fallen into abeyance and

the West-End is threatened with the loss of an educational asset of

incomparable value. I may add, however, that negotiations have been

opened with the Dean and Chapter of WESTMINSTER and that I do not

altogether despair of obtaining an alternative site and making a fresh

start with my plans for beautifying and humanising London."

* * * * *

Limitations.

There was a young lady of Clacton

Whose knowledge was wide and exact on

Jazz, jumpers and plays

And the cinema craze;

But she never had heard of Lord Acton.

* * * * *

"'Obregon signed the flag as did others at the convention,'

said Villa. 'He kissed the mlag, and cried as he kissed it.

Then those who wanted to break the agreement stole the blag

with the signatures of the delegates."

_American Paper._

This helps us a little to appreciate the confusion of Mexican

politics.

* * * * *

Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 158, June 16, 1920 · 第 27 / 34 题