Literature is becoming so commercialised that it is to be expected
that before long popular authors, who already surreptitiously practise
the tradesman's art, will go a step further and write their own
advertisements. No longer will they be content to get themselves
interviewed on the subject of their next book, their new car and
their favourite poodle, or to depend on the oleaginous eulogies of the
publishers.
For instance:
MR. DOUGLAS DORMY
begs to announce that he is
NOW SHOWING
his new Novel,
THE HIDDEN HAND OF HATE,
and confidently recommends it to
his Customers.
It contains no fewer than 92,563 of the
_BEST WORDS_
in the English Language
and is guaranteed
FREE from Split Infinitives.
Or again:
Are YOU one of the
mentally alert men, the wistful women,
who have filled up an application form
to-day for
_PATTERNS OF CHAPTER ONE_
of
SEPTIMUS POSHER'S
New great romance of love and mystery
THE SICKENING THUD?
If you have not already done so, lose
no time, but write asking for sample of
_OPENING CHAPTER_
(where the PINK-EYED WOMAN prevents
the marriage of ETHEL and LUDOVIC);
of
_CHAPTER NINETY_,
with its nine SUPERB-QUALITY MURDERS;
or
_CHAPTER TWO HUNDRED_
(the last), where ETHEL and LUDOVIC
at last set out through the
_FAIRYLAND OF LIFE_.
You incur NO RISK in asking for these
exquisite samples.
_Write direct to SEPTIMUS POSHER._
Or yet again:
MR. BOREAS BINKS
has pleasure in announcing that his
new volumes of
_RECOLLECTIONS_
is now showing at all Libraries. He
can confidently claim that this work,
entitled
PEOPLE I HAVE MET AND
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM,
is absolutely the most refined volume
of Scandal on the market. All the
reminiscences are novel and tasty.
Or once more:
KEATS WILLIAMS,
_Poet and Critic_.
Poems of every description completed
at the SHORTEST NOTICE.
Ask to see our choice SPRING LINES.
_Specimens Free._
EPICS within Two Days.
ODES within a few Hours.
Sonnets, Rondeaux, Triolets, Quatrains
while you wait.
_A well-known Judge writes_: "I should very much like to give
you a trial. I am sure you deserve it."
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