The same scene as in Act I. The next day. Two liveried footmen,
Theodore Ivánitch and Gregory.
FIRST FOOTMAN [with grey whiskers] Yours is the third house to-day.
Thank goodness that all the at-homes are in this direction. Yours used
to be on Thursdays.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, we changed to Saturday so as to be on the same
day as the Golóvkins and Grade von Grabes ...
SECOND FOOTMAN. The Stcherbákofs do the thing well. There's refreshments
for the footmen every time they've a ball.
The two Princesses, mother and daughter, come down the stairs
accompanied by Betsy. The old Princess looks in her note-book and at
her watch, and sits down on the settle. Gregory puts on her
overshoes.
YOUNG PRINCESS. Now, do come. Because, if you refuse, and Dodo refuses,
the whole thing will be spoilt.
BETSY. I don't know. I must certainly go to the Shoúbins. And then there
is the rehearsal.
YOUNG PRINCESS. You'll have plenty of time. Do, please. _Ne nous fais
pas faux bond._[14] Fédya and Koko will come.
[14] Do not disappoint us.
BETSY. _J'en ai par-dessus la tête de votre Koko._[15]
[15] BETSY. I have more than enough of your Koko.
YOUNG PRINCESS. I thought I should see him here. _Ordinairement il est
d'une exactitude ..._[16]
[16] YOUNG PRINCESS. ... He is usually so very punctual ...
BETSY. He is sure to come.
YOUNG PRINCESS. When I see you together, it always seems to me that he
has either just proposed or is just going to propose.
BETSY. Yes, I don't suppose it can be avoided. I shall have to go
through with it. And it is so unpleasant!
YOUNG PRINCESS. Poor Koko! He is head over ears in love.
BETSY. _Cessez, les gens!_[17]
[17] BETSY. Cease; mind the servants!
Young Princess sits down, talking in whispers. Gregory puts on her
overshoes.
YOUNG PRINCESS. Well then, good-bye till this evening.
BETSY. I'll try to come.
OLD PRINCESS. Then tell your papa that I don't believe in anything of
the kind, but will come to see his new medium. Only he must let me know
when. Good afternoon, _ma toute belle_. [Kisses Betsy, and exit,
followed by her daughter. Betsy goes upstairs].
GREGORY. I don't like putting on an old woman's overshoes for her; she
can't stoop, can't see her shoe for her stomach, and keeps poking her
foot in the wrong place. It's different with a young one; it's pleasant
to take her foot in one's hand.
SECOND FOOTMAN. Hear him! Making distinctions!
FIRST FOOTMAN. It's not for us footmen to make such distinctions.
GREGORY. Why shouldn't one make distinctions; are we not men? It's they
think we don't understand! Just now they were deep in their talk, then
they look at me, and at once it's "lay zhon!"
SECOND FOOTMAN. And what's that?
GREGORY. Oh, that means, "Don't talk, they understand!" It's the same at
table. But I understand! You say, there's a difference? I say there is
none.
FIRST FOOTMAN. There is a great difference for those who understand.
GREGORY. There is none at all. To-day I am a footman, and to-morrow I
may be living no worse than they are. Has it never happened that they've
married footmen? I'll go and have a smoke. [Exit].
SECOND FOOTMAN. That's a bold young man you've got.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. A worthless fellow, not fit for service. He used to
be an office boy and has got spoilt. I advised them not to take him, but
the mistress liked him. He looks well on the carriage when they drive
out.
FIRST FOOTMAN. I should like to send him to our Count; he'd put him in
his place! Oh, he don't like those scatterbrains. "If you're a footman,
be a footman and fulfil your calling." Such pride is not befitting.
Petrístchef comes running downstairs, and takes out a cigarette.
PETRÍSTCHEF [deep in thought] Let's see, my second is the same as my
first. Echo, a-co, co-coa. [Enter Koko Klíngen, wearing his pince-nez]
Ko-ko, co-coa. Cocoa tin, where do you spring from?
KOKO KLÍNGEN. From the Stcherbákofs. You are always playing the fool ...
PETRÍSTCHEF. No, listen to my charade. My first is the same as my
second, my third may be cracked, my whole is like your pate.
KOKO KLÍNGEN. I give it up. I've no time.
PETRÍSTCHEF. Where else are you going?
KOKO KLÍNGEN. Where? Of course to the Ívins, to practise for the
concert. Then to the Shoúbins, and then to the rehearsal. You'll be
there too, won't you?
PETRÍSTCHEF. Most certainly. At the re-her-Sall and also at the
re-her-Sarah. Why, at first I was a savage, and now I am both a savage
and a general.
KOKO KLÍNGEN. How did yesterday's séance go off?
PETRÍSTCHEF. Screamingly funny! There was a peasant, and above all, it
was all in the dark. Vovo cried like an infant, the Professor defined,
and Márya Vasílevna refined. Such a lark! You ought to have been there.
KOKO KLÍNGEN. I'm afraid, _mon cher_. You have a way of getting off with
a jest, but I always feel that if I say a word, they'll construe it into
a proposal. _Et ça ne m'arrange pas du tout, du tout. Mais du tout, du
tout!_[18]
[18] And that won't suit me at all, at all! Not at all, at all!
PETRÍSTCHEF. Instead of a proposal, make a proposition, and receive a
sentence! Well, I shall go in to Vovo's. If you'll call for me, we can
go to the re-her-Sarah together.
KOKO KLÍNGEN. I can't think how you can be friends with such a fool. He
is so stupid,--a regular blockhead!
PETRÍSTCHEF. And I am fond of him. I love Vovo, but ... "with a love so
strange, ne'er towards him the path untrod shall be" ... [Exit into
Vovo's room].
Betsy comes down with a Lady. Koko bows significantly to Betsy.
BETSY [shaking Koko's hand without turning towards him. To Lady] You are
acquainted?
LADY. No.
BETSY. Baron Klíngen.... Why were you not here last night?
KOKO KLÍNGEN. I could not come, I was engaged.
BETSY. What a pity, it was so interesting! [Laughs] You should have seen
what manifestations we had! Well, how is our charade getting on?
KOKO KLÍNGEN. Oh, the verses for _mon second_ are ready. Nick composed
the verses, and I the music.
BETSY. What are they? What are they? Do tell me!
KOKO KLÍNGEN. Wait a minute; how does it go?... Oh, the knight sings:
"Oh, _naught_ so beautiful as nature:
The _Nautilus_ sails by.
Oh, _naughty_ lass, oh, _naughty_ lass!
Oh, _nought_, oh _nought_! Oh fie!"
LADY. I see, my second is "nought," and what is my first?
KOKO KLÍNGEN. My first is _Aero_, the name of a girl savage.
BETSY. _Aero_, you see, is a savage who wished to devour the object of
her love. [Laughs] She goes about lamenting, and sings--
"My appetite,"
KOKO KLÍNGEN [interrupts]--
"How can I fight," ...
BETSY [chimes in]--
"Some one to chew I long.
I seeking go ..."
KOKO KLÍNGEN--
"But even so ..."
BETSY--
"No one to chew can find."
KOKO KLÍNGEN--
"A raft sails by,"
BETSY--
"It cometh nigh;
Two generals upon it ..."
KOKO KLÍNGEN--
"Two generals are we:
By fate's hard decree,
To this island we flee."
And then, the refrain--
"By fate's hard decree,
To this island we flee."
LADY. _Charmant!_
BETSY. But just think how silly!
KOKO KLÍNGEN. Yes, that's the charm of it!
LADY. And who is to be Aero?
BETSY. I am. And I have had a costume made, but mamma says it's "not
decent." And it is not a bit less decent than a ball dress. [To Theodore
Ivánitch] Is Bourdier's man here?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, he is waiting in the kitchen.
LADY. Well, and how will you represent Aeronaut?
BETSY. Oh, you'll see. I don't want to spoil the pleasure for you. _Au
revoir._
LADY. Good-bye! [They bow. Exit Lady].
BETSY [to Koko Klíngen] Come up to mamma.
Betsy and Koko go upstairs. Jacob enters from servants' quarters,
carrying a tray with teacups, cakes, &c., and goes panting across
the stage.
JACOB [to the Footmen] How d'you do? How d'you do? [Footmen bow].
JACOB [to Theodore Ivánitch] Couldn't you tell Gregory to help a bit!
I'm ready to drop.... [Exit up the stairs].
FIRST FOOTMAN. That is a hard-working chap you've got there.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, a good fellow. But there now--he doesn't satisfy
the mistress, she says his appearance is ungainly. And now they've gone
and told tales about him for letting some peasants into the kitchen
yesterday. It is a bad look-out: they may dismiss him. And he is a good
fellow.
SECOND FOOTMAN. What peasants were they?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Peasants that had come from our Koursk village to buy
some land. It was night, and they were our fellow-countrymen, one of
them the father of the butler's assistant. Well, so they were asked into
the kitchen. It so happened that there was thought-reading going on.
Something was hidden in the kitchen, and all the gentlefolk came down,
and the mistress saw the peasants. There was such a row! "How is this,"
she says; "these people may be infected, and they are let into the
kitchen!" ... She is terribly afraid of this infection.
Enter Gregory.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Gregory, you go and help Jacob. I'll stay here. He
can't manage alone.
GREGORY. He's awkward, that's why he can't manage. [Exit].
FIRST FOOTMAN. And what is this new mania they have got? This
infection!... So yours also is afraid of it?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. She fears it worse than fire! Our chief business,
nowadays, is fumigating, washing, and sprinkling.
FIRST FOOTMAN. I see. That's why there is such a stuffy smell here.
[With animation] I don't know what we're coming to with these infection
notions. It's just detestable! They seem to have forgotten the Lord.
There's our master's sister, Princess Mosolóva, her daughter was dying
and, will you believe it, neither father nor mother would come near her!
So she died without their having taken leave of her. And the daughter
cried, and called them to say good-bye--but they didn't go! The doctor
had discovered some infection or other! And yet their own maid and a
trained nurse were with her, and nothing happened to them; they're still
alive!
Enter Vasíly Leoníditch and Petrístchef from Vasíly Leoníditch's
room, smoking cigarettes.
PETRÍSTCHEF. Come along then, only I must take Koko--Cocoanut, with me.
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Your Koko is a regular dolt; I can't bear him. A
hare-brained fellow, a regular gad-about! Without any kind of
occupation, eternally loafing around! Eh, what?
PETRÍSTCHEF. Well, anyhow, wait a bit, I must say good-bye.
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. All right. And I will go and look at my dogs in the
coachman's room. I've got a dog there that's so savage, the coachman
said, he nearly ate him.
PETRÍSTCHEF. Who ate whom? Did the coachman really eat the dog?
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. You are always at it! [Puts on outdoor things and
goes out].
PETRÍSTCHEF [thoughtfully] Ma-kin-tosh, Co-co-tin.... Let's see. [Goes
upstairs].
Jacob runs across the stage.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What's the matter?
JACOB. There is no more thin bread and butter. I said ... [Exit].
SECOND FOOTMAN. And then our master's little son fell ill, and they sent
him at once to an hotel with his nurse, and there he died without his
mother.
FIRST FOOTMAN. They don't seem to fear sin! _I_ think you cannot escape
from God anywhere.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That's what I think.
Jacob runs upstairs with bread and butter.
FIRST FOOTMAN. One should consider too, that if we are to be afraid of
everybody like that, we'd better shut ourselves up within four walls, as
in a prison, and stick there!
Enter Tánya; she bows to the Footmen.
TÁNYA. Good afternoon.
Footmen bow.
TÁNYA. Theodore Ivánitch, I have a word to say to you.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, what?
TÁNYA. The peasants have come again, Theodore Ivánitch ...
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well? I gave the paper to Simon.
TÁNYA. I have given them the paper. They were that grateful! I can't say
how! Now they only ask you to take the money.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But where are they?
TÁNYA. Here, by the porch.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, I'll tell the master.
TÁNYA. I have another request to you, dear Theodore Ivánitch.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What now?
TÁNYA. Why, don't you see, Theodore Ivánitch, I can't remain here any
longer. Ask them to let me go.
Enter Jacob, running.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Jacob] What d'you want?
JACOB. Another samovár, and oranges.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Ask the housekeeper.
Exit Jacob.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Tánya] How is that?
TÁNYA. Why, don't you see, my position is such ...
JACOB [runs in] There are not enough oranges.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Serve up as many as you've got [Exit Jacob]. Now's
not the time! Just see what a bustle we are in.
TÁNYA. But you know yourself, Theodore Ivánitch, there is no end to this
bustle; one might wait for ever--you know yourself--and my affair is for
life.... Dear Theodore Ivánitch, you have done me a good turn, be a
father to me now, choose the right moment and tell her, or else she'll
get angry and won't let me have my passport.[19]
[19] Employers have charge of the servants' passports, and in this way
have a hold on them in case of misconduct.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Where's the hurry?
TÁNYA. Why, Theodore Ivánitch, it's all settled now.... And I could go
to my godmother's and get ready, and then after Easter we'd get
married.[20] Do tell her, dear Theodore Ivánitch!
[20] See footnote, p. 28. It is customary for peasants to marry just
after Easter, but when spring has come and the field work begun, no
marriages take place among them till autumn.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Go away--this is not the place.
An elderly Gentleman comes downstairs, puts on overcoat, and goes
out followed by the Second Footman.
Exit Tánya. Enter Jacob.
JACOB. Just fancy, Theodore Ivánitch, it's too bad! She wants to
discharge me now! She says, "You break everything, and forget Frisk, and
you let the peasants into the kitchen against my orders!" And you know
very well that I knew nothing about it. Tatyána told me, "Take them into
the kitchen"; how could I tell whose order it was?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Did the mistress speak to you?
JACOB. She's just spoken. Do speak up for me, Theodore Ivánitch! You
see, my people in the country are only just getting on their feet, and
suppose I lose my place, when shall I get another? Theodore Ivánitch,
do, please!
Anna Pávlovna comes down with the old Countess, whom she is seeing
off. The Countess has false teeth and hair. The First Footman helps
the Countess into her outdoor things.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Oh, most certainly, of course! I am so deeply touched.
COUNTESS. If it were not for my illness, I should come oftener to see
you.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You should really consult Peter Petróvitch. He is rough,
but nobody can soothe one as he does. He is so clear, so simple.
COUNTESS. Oh no, I shall keep to the one I am used to.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Pray, take care of yourself.
COUNTESS. _Merci, mille fois merci._[21]
[21] COUNTESS. Thank you (for your hospitality), a thousand thanks.
Gregory, dishevelled and excited, jumps out from the servants'
quarters. Simon appears behind him in the doorway.
SIMON. You'd better leave her alone!
GREGORY. You rascal! I'll teach you how to fight, you scamp, you!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What do you mean? Do you think you are in a public-house?
GREGORY. This coarse peasant makes life impossible for me.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [provoked] You've lost your senses. Don't you see? [To
Countess] _Merci, mille fois merci. A mardi!_[22]
[22] ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Thank you (for coming to see us), a thousand
thanks. Till next Tuesday!
Exeunt Countess and First Footman.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Gregory] What is the meaning of this?
GREGORY. Though I do occupy the position of a footman, still I won't
allow every peasant to hit me; I have my pride too.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Why, what has happened?
GREGORY. Why, this Simon of yours has got so brave, sitting with the
gentlemen, that he wants to fight!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Why? What for?
GREGORY. Heaven only knows!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Simon] What is the meaning of it?
SIMON. Why does he bother her?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What has happened?
SIMON [smiles] Well, you see, he is always catching hold of Tánya, the
lady's-maid, and she won't have it. Well, so I just moved him aside a
bit, just so, with my hand.
GREGORY. A nice little bit! He's almost caved my ribs in, and has torn
my dress-coat, and he says, "The same power as came over me yesterday
comes on me again," and he begins to squeeze me.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Simon] How dare you fight in my house?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. May I explain it to you, ma'am? I must tell you Simon
is not indifferent to Tánya, and is engaged to her. And Gregory--one
must admit the truth--does not behave properly, nor honestly, to her.
Well, so I suppose Simon got angry with him.
GREGORY. Not at all! It is all his spite, because I have discovered
their trickery.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What trickery?
GREGORY. Why, at the séance. All those things, last night,--it was not
Simon but Tánya who did them! I saw her getting out from under the sofa
with my own eyes.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What is that? From under the sofa?
GREGORY. I give you my word of honour. And it was she who threw the
paper on the table. If it had not been for her the paper would not have
been signed, nor the land sold to the peasants.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. And you saw it yourself?
GREGORY. With my own eyes. Shall I call her? She'll not deny it.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Yes, call her.
Exit Gregory.
Noise behind the scenes. The voice of the Doorkeeper, "No, no, you
cannot." Doorkeeper is seen at the front door, the three Peasants
rush in past him, the Second Peasant first; the Third one stumbles,
falls on his nose, and catches hold of it.
DOORKEEPER. You must not go in!
SECOND PEASANT. Where's the harm? We are not doing anything wrong. We
only wish to pay the money!
FIRST PEASANT. That's just it; as by laying on the signature the affair
is come to a conclusion, we only wish to make payment with thanks.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Wait a bit with your thanks. It was all done by fraud! It
is not settled yet. Not sold yet.... Leoníd.... Call Leoníd Fyódoritch.
[Exit Doorkeeper].
Leoníd Fyódoritch enters, but, seeing his wife and the Peasants,
wishes to retreat.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No, no, come here, please! I told you the land must not
be sold on credit, and everybody told you so, but you let yourself be
deceived like the veriest blockhead.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. How? I don't understand who is deceiving?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You ought to be ashamed of yourself! You have grey hair,
and you let yourself be deceived and laughed at like a silly boy. You
grudge your son some three hundred roubles which his social position
demands, and let yourself be tricked of thousands--like a fool!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Now come, Annette, try to be calm.
FIRST PEASANT. We are only come about the acceptation of the sum, for
example ...
THIRD PEASANT [taking out the money] Let us finish the matter, for
Christ's sake!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Wait, wait!
Enter Tánya and Gregory.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [angrily] You were in the small drawing-room during the
séance last night?
Tánya looks round at Theodore Ivánitch, Leoníd Fyódoritch, and
Simon, and sighs.
GREGORY. It's no use beating about the bush; I saw you myself ...
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Tell me, were you there? I know all about it, so you'd
better confess! I'll not do anything to you. I only want to expose him
[pointing to Leoníd Fyódoritch] your master.... Did you throw the paper
on the table?
TÁNYA. I don't know how to answer. Only one thing,--let me go home.
Enter Betsy unobserved.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] There, you see! You are being made
a fool of.
[Illustration: FRUITS OF CULTURE. ACT IV.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. There, you see! You are being made a fool of.]
TÁNYA. Let me go home, Anna Pávlovna!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No, my dear! You may have caused us a loss of thousands
of roubles. Land has been sold that ought not to be sold!
TÁNYA. Let me go, Anna Pávlovna!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No; you'll have to answer for it! Such tricks won't do.
We'll have you up before the Justice of the Peace!
BETSY [comes forward] Let her go, mamma. Or, if you wish to have her
tried, you must have me tried too! She and I did it together.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Well, of course, if _you_ have a hand in anything, what
can one expect but the very worst results!
Enter the Professor.
PROFESSOR. How do you do, Anna Pávlovna? How do you do, Miss Betsy?
Leoníd Fyódoritch, I have brought you a report of the Thirteenth
Congress of Spiritualists at Chicago. An amazing speech by Schmidt!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Oh, that is interesting!
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I will tell you something much more interesting! It turns
out that both you and my husband were fooled by this girl! Betsy takes
it on herself, but that is only to annoy me. It was an illiterate
peasant girl who fooled you, and you believed it all. There were no
mediumistic phenomena last night; it was she [pointing to Tánya] who did
it!
PROFESSOR [taking off his overcoat] What do you mean?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I mean that it was she who, in the dark, played on the
guitar and beat my husband on the head and performed all your idiotic
tricks--and she has just confessed!
PROFESSOR [smiling] What does that prove?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. It proves that your mediumism is--tomfoolery; that's what
it proves!
PROFESSOR. Because this young girl wished to deceive, we are to conclude
that mediumism is "tomfoolery," as you are pleased to express it?
[Smiles] A curious conclusion! Very possibly this young girl may have
wished to deceive: that often occurs. She may even have done something;
but then, what she did--_she_ did. But the manifestations of mediumistic
energy still remain manifestations of _mediumistic_ energy! It is even
very probable that what this young girl did, evoked (and so to say
solicited) the manifestation of mediumistic energy,--giving it a
definite form.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Another lecture!
PROFESSOR [sternly] You say, Anna Pávlovna, that this girl, and perhaps
this dear young lady also, did something; but the light we all saw, and,
in the first case the fall, and in the second the rise of temperature,
and Grossman's excitement and vibration--were those things also done by
this girl? And these are facts, Anna Pávlovna, facts! No! Anna
Pávlovna, there are things which must be investigated and fully
understood before they can be talked about, things too serious, too
serious ...
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. And the child that Márya Vasílevna distinctly saw?
Why, I saw it too.... That could not have been done by this girl.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You think yourself wise, but you are--a fool.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, I'm going.... Alexéy Vladímiritch, will you
come? [Exit into his study].
PROFESSOR [shrugging his shoulders, follows] Oh, how far, how far, we
still lag behind Western Europe!
Enter Jacob.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [following Leoníd Fyódoritch with her eyes] He has been
tricked like a fool, and he sees nothing! [To Jacob] What do you want?
JACOB. How many persons am I to lay the table for?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. For how many?... Theodore Ivánitch! Let him give up the
silver plate to you. Be off, at once! It is all his fault! This man will
bring me to my grave. Last night he nearly starved the dog that had done
him no harm! And, as if that were not enough, he lets the infected
peasants into the kitchen, and now they are here again! It is all his
fault! Be off at once! Discharge him, discharge him! [To Simon] And you,
horrid peasant, if you dare to have rows in my house again, I'll teach
you!
SECOND PEASANT. All right, if he is a horrid peasant there's no good
keeping him; you'd better discharge him too, and there's an end of it.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA [while listening to him looks at Third Peasant] Only look!
Why, he has a rash on his nose--a rash! He is ill; he is a hotbed of
infection!! Did I not give orders, yesterday, that they were not to be
allowed into the house, and here they are again? Drive them out!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then are we not to accept their money?
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Their money? Oh yes, take their money; but they must be
turned out at once, especially this one! He is quite rotten!
THIRD PEASANT. That's not just, lady. God's my witness, it's not just!
You'd better ask my old woman, let's say, whether I am rotten! I'm clear
as crystal, let's say.
ANNA PÁVLOVNA. He talks!... Off, off with him! It's all to spite me!...
Oh, I can't bear it, I can't!... Send for the doctor! [Runs away,
sobbing. Exit also Jacob and Gregory].
TÁNYA [to Betsy] Miss Elizabeth, darling, what am I to do now?
BETSY. Never mind, you go with them and I'll arrange it all. [Exit].
FIRST PEASANT. Well, your reverence, how about the reception of the sum
now?
SECOND PEASANT. Let us settle up, and go.
THIRD PEASANT [fumbling with the packet of bank-notes] Had I known, I'd
not have come for the world. It's worse than a fever!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Doorkeeper] Show them into my room. There's a
counting-board there. I'll receive their money. Now go.
DOORKEEPER. Come along.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And it's Tánya you have to thank for it. But for her
you'd not have had the land.
FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. As she made the proposal, so she put it
into effect.
THIRD PEASANT. She's made men of us. Else what were we? We had so little
land, no room to let a hen out, let's say, not to mention the cattle.
Good-bye, dear! When you get to the village, come to us and eat honey.
SECOND PEASANT. Let me get home and I'll start brewing the beer for the
wedding! You will come?
TÁNYA. Yes, I'll come, I'll come! [Shrieks] Simon, this is fine, isn't
it? [Exeunt Peasants].
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, Tánya, when you have your house I'll come to
visit you. Will you welcome me?
TÁNYA. Dear Theodore Ivánitch, just the same as we would our own father!
[Embraces and kisses him].
Curtain.
END OF "FRUITS OF CULTURE."
[ Transcriber's Note:
The following is a list of corrections made to the original. The first
line is the original line, the second the corrected one.
ALEXÉY VLADÍMIROVITCH KROUGOSVÉTLOF. A professor and scientist of about
ALEXÉY VLADÍMIRITCH KROUGOSVÉTLOF. A professor and scientist of about
THE FAT LADY: MÁRYA VASÍLYEVNA TOLBOÚHINA. A very distinguished, rich,
THE FAT LADY: MÁRYA VASÍLEVNA TOLBOÚHINA. A very distinguished, rich,
PETRÍSTCHEF. Nothing. I only say, get some at any cost I will wait.
PETRÍSTCHEF. Nothing. I only say, get some at any cost. I will wait.
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then pay up and don't be stingy [To Theodore
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then pay up and don't be stingy. [To Theodore
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. What d'you think, Theodore Ivanítch, is he flush of
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. What d'you think, Theodore Ivánitch, is he flush of
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I don't know. I hardly think so, But what does it
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I don't know. I hardly think so. But what does it
COACHMAN. They'd better be brought here to Loukérya
COACHMAN. They'd better be brought here to Loukérya.
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me a moment. [To Servants Cook] Where are the
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me a moment. [To Servants' Cook] Where are the
do it out of spite. .. I turn them out from there, and they bring them
do it out of spite.... I turn them out from there, and they bring them
too!. . [Exit, sobbing, followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch].
too!... [Exit, sobbing, followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch].
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then, I'll tell you what . .
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then, I'll tell you what ...
PETRÍSTCHEF [trembles] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! Márya Konstantínova,
PETRÍSTCHEF [trembles] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! Márya Konstantínovna,
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, it did get there! [Exit Theodore Ivánitch
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, it did get there! [Exit, Theodore Ivánitch
"A raft sails by,'
"A raft sails by,"
]