* * * * *
QUERY BY THE NAVY LEAGUE.--Does Brittania rule the waves, or does she
mean to waive her rule?
* * * * *
_Commander._ What is your complaint against this boy?
_Bluejacket._ Well, sir, as I was a-walkin' arft, this 'ere boy, 'e up
an' calls me a bloomin' idjit. Now, 'ow would you like to be called a
bloomin' idjit, supposin' you wasn't one?
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE PERILS OF MIMIC WAR.
_Motor Lieutenant, Motor Volunteer Corps_ (_to General in his charge_).
"I say, sir, if we"--(_bump!_)--"upset"--(_bang!_)--"shall I
get"--(_bump! bang!_)--"a military funeral too?"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Perilous position of a gallant officer of Volunteers, on
a recent march, who (ever thoughtful for the comfort of his hired
charger) chooses the cooling waters of the ford in preference to the
bridge._ "Here! Hi! Help, somebody! Hold on! I mean halt! He won't come
out, and he wants to lie down, and I believe he's going to rear!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: NAVAL REVIEW (_From an Antique_)]
* * * * *
TRAFALGAR DAY.--(_At the Board School._) _Teacher._ Now can any boy tell
me why Nelson's column was erected in Trafalgar Square?
_Johnny Grimes_ (_immediately_). Please, sir, to 'elp 'im up to 'eaven,
when 'e died in the arms of the Wictory.
* * * * *
[Illustration: REMOUNTS FOR THE YEOMANRY
_Horse-buying "Expert."_ "Yes, it certainly does look more like a
'towel-horse' than anything else; still it'll have to do!"--Passed.]
* * * * *
[Illustration: "How dreadfully stout the general is getting!"
"Yes, isn't it fortunate? Otherwise he wouldn't be able to wear all his
medals!"]
* * * * *