SCENE--_Pall Mall. Enter officer in full uniform hurriedly. He is
stopped by messenger._
_Messenger._ Yes, sir?
_Officer._ I want to see the Commander-in-Chief at once.
_Messenger._ Very sorry, sir, but that gentleman who has just entered
the room is likely to be there for the next three hours. He came here
two minutes before your arrival.
_Officer._ But is a civilian allowed to take precedence of an officer in
full uniform?
_Messenger._ Beg your pardon, sir, but he is not a civilian; but an
officer like yourself.
_Officer._ And yet he is admitted in mufti! Why, here have I had to come
up from the country in full rig, being chaffed at the railway station,
grinned at by the cabman, and cheered by the crowd!
_Messenger._ Yes, sir. Very sorry you should have been inconvenienced,
sir, especially as it was unnecessary, sir!
_Officer._ Unnecessary! Why, doesn't the order come into force to-day
that all officers who appear in the War Office for any purpose
whatsoever must be attired in the proper uniform of their rank and
regiment?
_Messenger._ No, sir. To-morrow, sir, the _second_ of April, is the
proper date. To-day, sir, is the _first_ of April.
_Officer._ And the first of April is surely the most appropriate date!
Quite the most appropriate date!
_Messenger._ Yes, sir!
(_Curtain._)
* * * * *
The War Office is taking steps to turn its surplus cavalrymen into foot
soldiers. We see nothing ridiculous in the idea--as some persons profess
to. We already have Mounted Infantry. Now we are to have Dismounted
Cavalry.
* * * * *
AN IMPOSSIBLE MANOEUVRE IN AUTUMN.--To be in the March past.
* * * * *
THE BEST MILITARY DRAWING.--Drawing your pay.
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE HANDY MAN.--What he will have to become, if
recruiting for the navy continues to fall off, and many more new
battleships are constructed.]
* * * * *
[Illustration: DIGNITY AND IMPUDENCE
_Hector._ "Now then, young feller--who are you staring at?"
_Hodge._ "Whoy shouldn't I stare at yer? _I pays vor yer!_"]
* * * * *