The performers then came forward, as follows:--First, the fiddler,
playing as well as he could on an old fiddle, “See the conquering hero
comes;” next, four men, two abreast, disguised with matting, rags, &c.
so as to completely prevent them from being recognised, each armed with
a boat-hook; then came Neptune himself, also disguised, mounted on the
carriage of the largest gun in the ship, and followed by the barber,
barber’s mate, swab-bearer, shaving-box carrier, and as many of the
ship’s company as chose to join them, dressed in such a grotesque manner
as to beggar all description. Arrived on the quarter-deck they were met
by the captain, when his briny majesty immediately dismounted, and the
following dialogue ensued:--
_Nept._ Are you the captain of this ship, sir?
_Capt._ I am.
_Nept._ What’s the name of your ship?
_Capt._ The Neptune of London.
_Nept._ Where is she bound to?
_Capt._ Greenland.
_Nept._ What is your name?
_Capt._ Matthew Ainsley.
_Nept._ You are engaged in the whale fishery?
_Capt._ I am.
_Nept._ Well, I hope I shall drink your honour’s health, and I wish you
a prosperous fishery.
[_Here the captain presented him with three quarts of rum._]
_Nept._ (_filling a glass._) Here’s health to you, captain, and success
to our cause. Have you got any fresh-water sailors on board? for if you
have, I must christen them, so as to make them useful to our king and
country.
_Capt._ We have eight of them on board at your service; I therefore wish
you good morning.
The procession then returned in the same manner as it came, the
candidates for nautical fame following in the rear; after descending the
fore-hatchway they congregated between decks, when all the offerings to
Neptune were given to the deputy, (the cook,) consisting of whiskey,
tobacco, &c. The barber then stood ready with his box of lather, and
the landsmen were ordered before Neptune, when the following dialogue
took place with each, only with the alteration of the man’s name, as
follows:--
_Nept._ (_to another_.) What is your name?
_Ans._ Gilbert Nicholson.
_Nept._ Where do you come from?
_Ans._ Shetland.
_Nept._ Have you ever been to sea before?
_Ans._ No.
_Nept._ Where are you going to?
_Ans._ Greenland.
At each of these answers, the brush dipped in the lather (consisting of
soap-suds, oil, tar, paint, &c.) was thrust into the respondent’s mouth
and over his face; then the barber’s-mate scraped his face with a razor,
made of a piece of iron hoop well notched; his sore face was wiped with
a damask towel, (a boat-swab dipped in filthy water) and this ended the
ceremony. When it was over they undressed themselves, the fiddle struck
up, and they danced and regaled with their grog until they were “_full
three sheets in the wind_.”