I PROPOSE TO SHEILAH
Next morning, as soon after breakfast as was fit and proper, I set off
to inquire after Sheilah. I found her looking very pale and jaded, poor
girl; and no wonder, for the business of setting the broken limb had
been a painful one.
'Sit down,' she said, pointing to a chair by her sofa. 'I want to have a
good talk with you. Jim, I hear you were fighting with Colin last
night.'
I hung my head and did not answer.
'What you two should have to fight about I'm sure I don't know,' she
went on. 'But, remember, I'll have no more of it. If I thought you were
to blame I should be very angry with you. But Colin has already been
here and cleared you of everything. Poor Colin!'
'I'm sorry I ever laid my hand upon him,' I said. 'He's a better man
than I am by a good deal.'
'I'm not so sure of that, Jim,' she said, holding out her little hand
to me; 'but, remember, on no account are you two to be anything but the
very best of friends for the future. And now we'll forget all about it.
I want to talk to you about another matter.'
'What is that, Sheilah?'
'About yourself. What do you intend to do? You must not--and, indeed,
you cannot--go on living here without employment. Have you thought of
looking for anything?'
'I have. And what's more I have made inquiries all round, but for the
life of me I can hear of nothing. I'm no good for anything but bush
work, as you know, or I might apply for the billet there is vacant in
the bank up yonder. No, Sheilah! I'm afraid I shall have to clear out
and look for work elsewhere. There's a drover, Billy Green of Bourke,
going up North as far as the Flinders River for a mob of fat cattle next
week. He might take me on.'
'No! no! Jim, you're fit for something better than that,' she answered.
'Why not stay here and take a place for yourself. With your knowledge of
cattle, backed up by patience and hard work, you might make a very good
thing of it in time.'
'There's one serious drawback to that, Sheilah, and that is the fact
that I haven't got the money. If I had, I admit I might be able to do
something in a small way. But as I haven't, well, you must see for
yourself it's impossible.'
'It's not so impossible as you imagine, old friend,' said Sheilah, with
a smile.
'What do you mean?' I asked, surprised at the confident way in which she
spoke. 'Has anyone told you of the money I refused to take from my
father yesterday?'
'You refused to take money from your own father? Oh, Jim, that was
foolish of you. How much did he offer you?'
'Five hundred pounds,' I answered. 'I almost wish now I had put my pride
in my pocket and accepted it. It would have come in very handily,
wouldn't it?'
'You must go up and see him directly you leave here,' she said with
authority. 'Whatever you do, you must not let such an opportunity slip
through your fingers. It was too foolish of you to decline his help.'
'I'm afraid I'm a very foolish fellow altogether, Sheilah,' I answered.
'But my father insulted me; he called me--well, never mind what he
called me; at any rate, having done it, he said he would give me five
hundred pounds, and not another halfpenny, if I were to come to him
starving. I flared up in reply, and told him that I would not touch his
money if I were dying, and came away in a huff.'
'Well, you must go back and get it now, whatever happens. Why, with five
hundred pounds you might lay the foundation of a splendid fortune. Now,
pay attention to me, and tell me if there is any place about here you
would like to take?'
'I should just think there is. Why, there's Merriman's selection on the
other side of the creek; it's as good a little place as any in the
district, and better than most. I've been coveting it for years, and if
I had the money I would take it, stock it by degrees, and as time went
on, and opportunity served, get possession of the land on either side of
it. Yes! If I had that place, I do believe I could make it pay.'
'How much capital would you want to take it and stock it?'
I picked up a bit of paper from the table by where I sat, and, finding a
pencil, set to work to figure it all out. Sheilah was quite excited, and
offered suggestions and corrections as we proceeded, like the clever
little business woman she always was. At last it was done.
'I reckon,' I said, looking up at her from the paper in my hand, 'that
if I had eight hundred pounds cash, and a balance in the bank of five
hundred more, I could do it, and I'm certain I could make a success of
it. But, then, what's the use of all this calculation. I haven't got the
money, and, what's more, I'm certain my father won't go higher than the
five hundred he mentioned, even if he lets me have that now.'
Sheilah was silent for nearly a minute, looking out of the window to
where the tall sunflowers were nodding their heads in the scorching
glare. A little dry wind rustled through the garden and flickered a
handful of earth on to the well-swept boards of the verandah. Then she
turned to me again and said rather nervously,--
'Jim, you have known me a long time have you not?'
'What a question, Sheilah,' I cried. 'Why, I've known you ever since the
night of the great storm--when you were a little toddling blue-eyed
baby. Of course, I've known you a long time.'
'Well, in that case, you mustn't be angry with an old friend for making
a suggestion.'
'Angry with you, Sheilah! Not if I know it. What is it you wish to say?'
'That--well, that you let me lend you the money. No! No don't speak,'
she cried, seeing that I was about to interpose. 'Let me say what I want
to say first, and then you can talk as much as you please. Yes! I
repeat, let me lend you the money, Jim. My father, as you know, has
always put by so much a year for me, to do as I like with, ever since I
was born. The sum now amounts to nearly fifteen hundred pounds. Well, I
want to lend you a thousand pounds of it. And that, with the five
hundred from your father, will give you fifteen hundred pounds to begin
with, or two hundred more than you consider necessary. There, Jim, I
have done; now what have you to say?'
'What can I say? How can I tell you how deeply I am touched by your
generosity and goodness. Oh, Sheilah! what a true friend you have always
been to me.'
'You accept my offer, then, Jim?' she cried, her beautiful eyes at the
same time filling with tears.
'I cannot,' I answered. 'Deeply as I am touched by it, I cannot. It
would not be right.'
'Oh, Jim, I never thought you would refuse. You will break my heart if
you do. I have been thinking this out ever since you returned from
Bourke, and always hoping that I should be able to persuade you to
accept it. And now you refuse!'
She gave a deep sigh, and the big tears trembled in her eyes as if
preparatory to flowing down her cheeks.
'Don't you see my position, Sheilah?' I said. 'Can't you understand that
if I took your money, and invested in this enterprise, and it did not
turn out a success, I might never have the means of repaying you. No! At
any cost I feel that I ought not to take it.'
'Jim, you are giving me the greatest disappointment I have ever had in
my life. Really you are.'
'Do you mean it?'
'I do.'
'Will it really make you happy if I accept?'
'Perfectly happy.'
'Then I will do so. And may God bless you for it. By giving me this
chance you are saving me.'
'You will work hard then, won't you, Jim?'
'I will work my fingers to the bone, Sheilah.'
It was as much as I could do to speak, so great was my emotion. My
brain surged with words, but my mouth could not utter them. I took her
hand and kissed it tenderly. A declaration of love trembled on my
tongue, and wanted but one little word to make me pour it out.
'You must go and see your father this afternoon,' she said after a
little pause, 'and then come down and tell me what he says. When you've
done that you'd better inquire about the place. Oh, if only I were able
to see it with you!'
'So you shall directly, Sheilah,' I cried. 'You shall guide and counsel
me in all I do; for you are my guardian angel, and have always been.'
'Do you mean that, Jim?' she asked very softly.
'Before God, I do,' I cried vehemently. 'Sheilah, I know now what you
are to me. I know that the old brotherly affection I have felt for you
all these years is dead.'
'Dead, Jim!' she cried. 'Oh, surely not dead!'
'Yes, dead,' I answered; 'but out of its ashes has risen a greater, a
nobler, a purer love than I ever believed myself capable of feeling.
Sheilah, I love you with all my heart and soul, I love you more than
life itself.'
She did not answer. For a minute or so there was only to be heard the
chirping of the cicadas in the trees outside, and the dry rustle of the
wind among the oranges bushes.
'Darling,' I said, when I found my voice once more, 'if I take this
money and work as hard as any man can, is it to be for nothing? Or may I
toil day and night, knowing that there is a reward, greater than any
money, saving up for me at the end? Sheilah, do you love me well enough
to be my wife!'
This time she answered, without a falter in her voice, and as she did
she took my great brown hand between hers and smoothed it.
'Jim, I have always loved you' she said, 'all my life long. I will
gladly; nay, that doesn't seem to express it at all. Let me say only
that I love you, and that I will be your wife whenever you come to claim
me. Will that satisfy you, dear?'
I bent over and kissed her on her sweet, pure lips.
'God bless you, Sheilah,' I replied so softly that I scarcely knew my
own voice.
Then we both sat silent again for some time. Sheilah it was who spoke
first.
'Now, Jim, how are you going to begin?'
'I'm going to find your father, and tell him everything,' I said. 'He
ought to know before anyone else.'
'Very well, find him and tell him. Then go and see your own father and
ask him for the money. After that, if you like, you may come back here
and tell me how you have succeeded.'
I bade her good-bye, and went off to find her father.
He was in the act of leaving the stockyard when I encountered him, and I
suppose he must have seen from my face that I had news for him--for,
when he had shaken hands with me, he stepped back to the rails and
leaned against them.
'Now, James,' he said, 'what is it ye have to tell me?'
'Something I'm rather doubtful whether you'll like,' I answered,
wondering how to begin.
'Supposing I can guess already,' he said, with a smile. 'Ye have been a
long time with Sheilah!'
'I have been deciding a very important matter!' I replied.
'Have ye accepted her offer?'
'I have; but how do you know that she had made one?' I answered.
'We discussed it together last night,' he said. 'My Sheilah is a
generous girl, and she takes a great interest in ye, James, lad.'
'Who knows that better than I?' I answered. 'And I will do my best to
show her that her trust is not misplaced. But her generous loan is not
the chief thing I wish to speak to you about.'
'What is the other, then?' he said, looking a little nervously at me, I
thought.
'It concerns Sheilah's own happiness,' I replied. 'Mr McLeod, your
daughter has promised to be my wife.'
He was more staggered by this bit of news than I had expected he would
be, and for a little while gazed at me in silent amazement. At last he
pulled himself together, and said solemnly,--
'This is a very serious matter.'
'I hope it is,' I replied, 'for I love Sheilah and she loves me. We are
both deeply serious, and I hope you have nothing to say against it?'
'Of course, if ye both love each other--as I believe ye do,' he
answered, 'and ye, laddie, work hard to prove yourself worthy of her, I
shall say nothing. But we must look things squarely in the face and have
no half measures. Ye must bear with me, lad--if in what I'm going to say
I hurt your feelings--but my duty lies before me, and I must do it. Ye
see, Jim, ye have been foolish; your reputation in the township is a
wild one; ye admitted to me having been a gambler; remember ye rode in
that race against your father's and your best friends' wishes; ye were
mixed up with a very disreputable set hereabouts, one of whom has been
openly accused of felony; remember, I do not believe that ye had
anything at all to do with the stealing of that horse--if he was stolen,
as folks say; and now ye have also been turned out of house and home by
your own father. Ye must yourself admit that these circumstances are not
of a kind calculated to favourably impress a father who loves his only
daughter as I love mine. But, on the other hand, my lad, I have known ye
pretty nearly all your life, and I know that your errors are of the
head, not of the heart, so I am inclined to regard them rather
differently. Now, your path lies before ye. Ye have an opportunity of
retrieving the past and building up the future, let us see what ye can
do. If, we'll say, by this day year ye have proved to me that ye are
really in earnest, ye shall have my darling, and God's blessing be on ye
both. I can't say anything fairer than that, can I?'
'I have no right to expect that you should say anything so fair,' I
answered. 'Mr McLeod, I will try; come what may, you shall not be
disappointed in me.'
'I believe ye, laddie,' he said, and then we went towards the front gate
together. I wished him good-bye, and having done so, left him and went
up the hill towards the township.
Never in my life do I remember to have walked with so proud and so
confident a step. My heart was filled with hope and happiness. Sheilah
loved me, and had promised to be my wife. Her father had, to all intents
and purposes, given his consent. It only remained for me to prove myself
worthy of the trust that had been reposed in me. And come what might, I
would be worthy. Henceforward, no man should have the right to breathe a
word against me. I would work for Sheilah as no man ever worked for a
girl before; so that in the happy days before us she might always have
reason to look up to and be proud of me. Then in a flash came back the
memory of that gruesome ride to the Blackfellow's Well. Once again I saw
the murdered man lying so still in his lonely grave among the rocks on
the hillside. I shuddered, and with an effort I put the memory from me.
And just as I did so, I arrived at the hotel.
As soon as I had eaten my lunch I set off to call upon my father. I
found him sitting in the verandah, as usual, reading. He did not seem at
all surprised at my appearance. On the other hand, he said, as I came up
to the steps,--
'You have thought better of it and come back for that money, I suppose?'
'I have,' I answered. 'A chance has been given me to-day of settling
down to a good thing, if I can only raise a certain sum of money. If you
are still of the same mind as you were yesterday, I should feel grateful
if you would let me have your cheque for the amount you mentioned?'
Without another word he rose and went into the house; when he returned
he held between his finger and thumb a little slip of pale blue paper
which I well knew was a cheque. Giving it to me he said,--
'There it is. Now go!'
I thanked him, and turned to do as he ordered, but before I had time to
descend the steps he stopped me by saying,--
'I have asked no questions, but I trust this business you are now
embarking on will prove a little more reputable than that in which you
have been hitherto engaged.'
'You need have no fear on that score,' I answered. 'At the same time, I
do not admit that there was anything in the last matter, to which you
refer, of which I need be ashamed.'
'I think we have discussed that before. We need not do so again.'
I was once more about to leave him, when something induced me to say,--
'Father, is this state of things to go on between us much longer? Will
you never forgive a bit of heedless obstinacy on the part of one so much
younger than yourself?'
'When I see signs of improvement I may be induced to re-consider my
decision, not till then,' he answered. 'The sad part of it is that so
far those signs are entirely wanting.'
'I am turning over a new leaf now.'
'I desire to see proof of it first,' he replied. 'I must confess my
experience makes me sceptical.'
'It is useless, then, for me to say any more on the subject.'
'Quite useless. For the future let your actions speak for themselves.
They will be quite significant enough, believe me.'
'Then I wish you good day.'
'Good day to you.'
And so we parted.
Leaving the old home, I strode down the hill, crossed the ford, and made
my way to the principal bank in the township, where I opened an account
with my father's cheque. This business completed, I passed on to the
agent who had Merriman's selection under offer, and when I left his
office an hour later I was in a fair way towards calling myself the
proprietor of the property for a term of years.
Next morning I rode over to the selection and thoroughly examined it. It
was about 10,000 acres in extent, splendidly grassed, and had an
excellent frontage to the river. Merriman had built himself a hut on a
little knoll, and there I determined to install myself, utilising all
the time I could spare from my work among the stock in building another
and better one, to which I could bring Sheilah when she became my wife.
That afternoon the arrangements advanced another step, and by the end of
the week following the papers were signed, and I was duly installed as
possessor.
The next business was to secure the services of a man. This
accomplished, I set to work in grim earnest, the fences were thoroughly
overhauled and renovated--a new well was sunk in the back country--a new
stockyard was erected near the hut, and, by the time Sheilah was able to
get about again, I had bought a couple of thousand sheep at a price
which made them an undoubted bargain, had erected my bough-shearing
shed, and was all ready for getting to work upon my clip.