[From Helen's Diary.]
_February --._ Arose, breakfasted, and went for a drive; stopped at
Gladys's on the way home; had tea with her in her boudoir.
Mr. Grayson wanted to come in too, but Gladys wouldn't let him. She says
he is really a terrible bore; that she has to keep him down or he would
run right over her. I wish Edgar would run right over me. She says that
Mr. Grayson never seems to remember that after a woman has discharged
all her duties, she is absolutely too worn out for the little et ceteras
and asides of life. I think she is right. She is one of those women who
carry conviction with all they say; but I always feel in some way that
Edgar is a duty instead of an et cetera and an aside. I dare say I shall
get over this in time. Gladys assures me I will.
She said to-day that I was "just cut out" for a successful diplomat;
that I am so sincere and straightforward in my manner that I am the last
person on earth to suspect. She says it will be my "trump card" when I
know how to play it.
I presume I am lacking in fine appreciation, but in some way this seemed
to cheapen sincerity. It does not, of course, for of all women in the
world, Gladys would be the last to endure cheap sentiment or cheap lace.
Of all the spotless, high-bred, delicate, forcible women I have ever
seen, she is the most so.
I blushed to think of the cold contempt she would feel for me should she
even know that I had heard such a proposition. I represented to her a
case like mine, as though it were something I had heard of, and asked
her what she could think of such a thing. Her haughty indignation was
superb, inspiring. It did me good. I feel just so myself. I wanted to
blush for even having made Mr. Everet go there the other night.
Well, nothing else of any account happened to-day.
I met Mrs. Stevens and looked the other way, at the pug of the wife of
the Secretary of the Navy. It _is_ so strange that she has no better
taste than to wear a blue gown with a brown dog.
I chatted a moment with Senator Stacy's wife, and told her that her
second child was a picture--(it is--of ugliness). I felt it a duty to
say this, however, as the only thing false about it was the impression
it conveyed to her--and the Senator's good will is quite necessary to
Edgar's plans.
Then I went to the Talbots', and wound up with the Farringtons'
reception.
And now, thank heaven, I am going to bed, and Edgar will be at home in
the morning. I shall go nowhere to-morrow night, for he will be glad to
have me at home--unless he should treat me coldly. I won't even _think_
of _that_.